Chapter 24: Thomas

A/N: 11.07.20

Q/A: Do you guys believe in astrology? Do you have a favorite sign?

P.s: if you'd like access to early chapters, you can join my patreon. Link is in my bio ❤

⤵️⤵️⤵️

*Thomas's pov*

After walking around the city, I finally decided to go home. It was pitch dark and I could hardly see what was in front of me. The dim street lights that haven’t been changed for decades weren’t much help either, so I ended up having to use the flashlight of my phone.

Elle was sitting on the front stairs, staring at who knows what. I noticed that she was holding something in her hand. It was her favorite spoon, the one that I bent.

“You were with a friend?” she asked, but she didn’t meet my gaze. I sat down beside her, keeping a small distance between us.

“I was at work,” I said. “And then I went for a walk. I decided to reflect on my sins before my Sunday morning confession.”

I could tell that Elle was trying hard not to laugh.

“You don’t even go to church,” she chortled.

“I think I need to find Jesus.”

“I think you need to get your shit together before you do.”

“Jesus will guide the way,” I said. Elle burst into laughter, shaking her head which made the messy bun in her hair loosen. She turned towards me and bit her lower lip, the smile on her face slowly vanishing. “I’m sorry for yelling at you, I shouldn’t have taken my anger out on you.”

The fact that Elle was the one who was apologizing made me feel even worse.

“It was my fault. I was in a bad mood and I said things that I didn’t mean.”

“You meant what you said, even though you shouldn’t have said it that way, you still meant it.”

My jaw clenched, staring at my dirty sneakers. “Sorry.”

“Are you really unhappy?” I could hear the pain in her voice and I turned towards her.

“Elle, I’d be miserable if it weren’t for you. You’re the one keeping our family together, and when I say family, I mean you, me, and Molly. You gave up everything for us. You’re young and you shouldn’t have to live a life like this, and I’m so damn lucky to have you as my sister and I’m sorry if I didn’t tell this until now,” I blurted. “You’re the best mom, dad, brother, and older sister ever. Screw our parents.”

Elle smiled tilting her head back. “Do you miss them?”

“Of course I do,” I mumbled, looking away.

“Me too.”

We stared at the pitch-black void in front of us in silence.

“But we have each other,” she said. “And we’ll survive without them, just like we always have.”

“You’re not mad at me?”

“You’re still going to do the dishes for the next two weeks,” she said.

“Right,” I laughed half-heartedly, but I was glad that Elle and I were on speaking terms now. “Elle? I um, I have something to tell you.”

She groaned. “Don’t tell me you got a girl pregnant.”

“W-What?”

“I dunno, we’ve never had that talk before.”

“I know how condoms work,” I snapped.

“Oh,” she said, blinking in surprise. “So no one’s pregnant?”

“Of course not!”

“Good, because I don’t have enough money for child support. So what did you want to tell me?”

My jaw tightened and my hands clenched. I avoided her gaze, finding comfort in the darkness around us. I took in a deep breath but I knew that I needed to tell her. Eli was right. I wasn’t alone. Even though I felt like the entire world was against me, there would always be people standing beside me.

"I think I'm broken."

"We all break, Thomas, just in different ways.”

“No, I mean…” My voice drifted as I tried to find the right words. “I think I like boys.”

The silence that followed made my chest tighten, and I ran my hand repeatedly through my hair to busy them.

“You think?” she asked. She didn’t sound mad. Just curious.

“I like a boy,” I corrected myself. “I like girls too but the person I like right now is a guy.”

Another silence followed.

“Is it Jayden?”

“What?! No! He’s like a brother to me."

She shrugged. “You two have this weird homo thing going on.”

“We have a no homo thing going on.”

“Good, because I’m team Rhayden forever,” she said. Elle loved Rhys and Jayden.

“Same. I can’t ruin their dream of getting married and having a gazillion kids,” I snorted. Jayden always wanted to be a dad, saying that he wanted at least five of them. Rhys on the other hand wasn't too keen on the idea of popping out five little baby Jaydens.

“If it’s not Jayden, then who is it?”

I nibbled on my lower lip. “His name is Eli. We have a couple of classes together and I used to have detention with him.”

“The bicycle you fixed a few weeks ago. That was his, wasn’t it?”

“Yeah.”

“You must like him a lot,” she grinned. I blinked in surprise.

“Wait, why aren’t mad?”

“Why would I be mad?”

“I dunno, don’t you find it strange that I’m not,” I paused. “Straight?”

“Thomas, I have a lot of problems, and your sexuality isn’t one of them,” she sighed. “At least I don’t have to worry about you getting a girl pregnant.”

I was both surprised and happy but also a little disappointed. I expected Elle to give me a long lecture about how unnatural being broken was, but she didn’t seem to give a damn. Maybe Eli was right. Had I been overthinking this whole time?

“Straight or bent, you’re still my little brother. My little brother who’s great with taxes.”

“I thought you were going to kick me out of the house or something.”

Elle raised the bent spoon that she was holding. “You see this, Thomas? This is you.”

"Is this a new way of insulting me?”

“Just look at it. What is it?"

"A spoon."

“What kind of spoon?”

“A bent one.”

"But it's still a spoon. Bent or straight, it's still a spoon. People are the same. Bent or straight, that doesn't change who they are as a person. The same goes for you. Whether you like boys or girls, you’re still Thomas. Nothing will change that.”

Elle reached out and gently tousled my hair, smiling.

“But you still owe me a new spoon.”

⤵️⤵️⤵️

A/N: Please don't forget to leave a vote!

Q/A: Are you an extrovert or introvert?