Forever After All: Chapter 64

Just having her sitting next to me has my heart racing. It’s been weeks since I last touched her, and part of me thought I never would again. I didn’t think she’d ever speak to me again. For weeks, she’s been ignoring my presence at her house and every gift I’ve sent… she’s been ignoring me.

“Don’t take me anywhere public.”

I tighten my grip on the steering wheel and glance at her. “Why not?”

She looks at me, her expression unreadable. “I don’t want people to think we got back together. I saw the speculations in the tabloids, the rumors. I want no part of it.”

My heart wrenches and a sense of loss washes over me. I park the car by the side of the road and glance out my window, unsure what to do, what to say.

“Are you seeing someone?” I ask, the words leaving my lips involuntarily.

Elena looks at me, her eyes flashing with something I can’t quite decipher. She’s never been hard to read, but tonight she’s shutting me out.

Elena turns away and opens her door, stepping out of the car. I follow her lead and walk up to her just as her door slams closed.

She leans back against my car, and I lean into her, my arms on either side of her, caging her in. I want to take a step closer and feel her body against mine, but I resist. Instead, I take in her beautiful face and those eyes that haunt my dreams. I see her every time I close my eyes, but she… she’s moving on.

“Why don’t you want to be seen with me, Elena? What does it matter if we end up in a tabloid or two?”

I try my best to keep my raging thoughts in check, but I fail. Is she dating someone? Her security team is as good as mine, and no matter how hard I try, I’ve been unable to find out what she gets up to, where she goes, who she spends time with.

“Does it matter?” she asks, her gaze unwavering.

I raise my hand to her face, pushing her hair behind her ear gently. “It does,” I say, trying my hardest to act like my heart isn’t fucking breaking. “You’re still my wife, Elena.”

Her eyes flash with anger and she grits her teeth. “Not by choice. We’re separated, Alexander. I’m only your wife on paper, and if I have it my way, I won’t be for much longer. You might not want to sign, but that won’t stop me from obtaining a divorce. My lawyers are working on it as we speak.”

I take a step back, my stomach recoiling. “You want to leave me that badly, huh?”

Elena looks away, her entire body tense. It’s clear that she doesn’t want to be here. She doesn’t want to be with me, and I can’t help but wonder who she wishes were with her right now, in my place.

When she looks back at me, there’s a forced smile on her face. “Well, I promised you a date, didn’t I?” she says. “I’ll give you tonight, Alexander, and in return, you’ll let me go.”

One night. That’s all the time I have left with her. For weeks I was certain that she was hurt and that she needed me to prove to her that I love her, that I won’t give up on her or walk away, no matter how hard things get.

Now I realize I was wrong. It’s not me she needs at all. She doesn’t need my love, she doesn’t need me to prove anything to her. What she needs is for me to let her go, so she can truly move on and live the life she deserves. A life without me.

I move to stand next to Elena, both of us leaning back against my car, her shoulder brushing against mine. Her face is tipped up toward the stars in the sky, and I stare at her, taking in her beauty. The idea of her being with someone else makes me violently angry, it makes me want to chain her to me. But I can’t be selfish with her. Not ever again.

This beautiful woman has given up her entire life to save her mother’s, her every hope and dream. There’s no one that deserves happiness more than Elena does, and if it isn’t me that she’ll be happy with, then I need to walk away. I need to do it, even if it kills me.

“Tell me three good things that happened to you today,” I ask her.

Elena looks at me, her eyes widening just slightly in surprise. The question broke through her cold demeanor, and she smiles. “Hmm, three things? My mother and I went out for breakfast together, and just having her sit opposite me is still surreal. I also managed to cut costs in Rousseau Corporation’s marketing department by ten percent, and, well… I went on a first date today with someone.”

I freeze, my heart twisting painfully. I can’t even describe the pain I feel at those words. My heart feels like it’s in physical pain, and my stomach turns in a way it never has before. Heartbreak… that must be what this is.

“I wondered why you were home late today,” I say, staring up at the sky to keep my jealousy from showing. “Must have been a good date, considering how late you got back. It’s no wonder you finally bothered to come speak to me—to ask me to stay away.” I turn to look at her, my eyes dropping to her lips. By the time she came home tonight I’d been standing in front of her gate for hours. She didn’t come home until after ten, but she came home alone. I lift my hand to her face, my thumb stroking her lip. “Did he kiss you goodnight before walking you to your car?”

I swallow hard and drag my eyes away. Did he make her laugh? Did he get to hold her hand? Did she give him what used to be mine?

“Alexander,” she says, her voice soft. “Don’t.”

I run a hand through my hair and let my eyes fall closed. She’s been all I’ve been able to think about for weeks. I’ve been in such a bad state that my grandfather has had to step back in at work. Everything I thought I ever wanted feels meaningless without Elena, but she… she’s been going on dates, she been getting over me.

I look at her, and it hits me. I lost her. I lost the one good thing in my life, and I only have myself to blame. Tonight is all she’ll give me, and she isn’t even doing it willingly. I coerced her, the way I did when I made her marry me. I was always her last resort—whoever she’s with now is who she chose. I might not like it, but Elena deserves to have a choice. She deserves the world.

I hold my hand out for her and force a smile to my face. “Will you dance with me?” I ask, my voice soft. If tonight is the last time I get to hold her, then I have to make the most of it.

Elena turns to look at me, startled. “Here?”

“You and I danced in that cramped little space at Inferno, so why not?”

I grab my phone and put on the exact same song that was playing that night, and Elena takes my hand. I pull her closer, my arms wrapping around her waist while hers wrap around my neck. Having her this close, fuck.

Elena and I sway to the music, and she laughs when I twirl her around. “We still can’t dance for shit,” she says, leaning back in my arms. I look at her, and she takes my goddamn breath away. She’s so beautiful, and the way she smiles, fucking hell.

She leans into me, her chest pressed against mine, and she still fits into my arms so perfectly. How could this woman not be made for me?

My eyes drop to her lips and I swallow hard. Her grip on me tightens, and I tilt my head slightly, moving just a little closer. I want just one last kiss. I want her lips pressed against mine, just one more time. Elena’s breathing quickens, and she rises to her tiptoes.

Her lips brush against mine and I can almost taste her. Her eyes fall closed, and I kiss the edge of her lips. She inhales sharply and threads her fingers through my hair, pulling me closer. “Alexander,” she whispers.

I pause at the sound of my name, pulling away reluctantly. I cup her cheek gently, my thumb brushing over her lips. She looks at me as though she can’t figure me out, and I force a smile onto my face. She wouldn’t even be here with me if she had a choice, if I didn’t ask for a date in return for staying away. What she wants is for me leave her alone, yet here I am, wanting far more than she’s willing to give.

A kiss… I have no fucking right.

“Come on, Buttercup,” I whisper. “I’ll take you home.”