Chapter 24

Chloe sat across the table from Elliot, watching as he talked about his latest deal while he shoved steak into his mouth. They were supposed to meet with the others for a drink and brunch; and they had met them for a moment. Then Elliot impatiently said he was hungry, ushered Chloe to a table, and ordered food.

He hadn't bothered to invite the others, and Chole had declined lunch as she sipped on her mimosa.

"I'm sorry if I was rude to your friends, but I only have a limited amount of time before I have to be across town for a meeting, and eating on our own is quicker. You can join them after I leave if you like." He shoved another bit of steak into his mouth.

"Thank you for your permission to talk to my friends," Chloe said overly sweetly.

Elliot at least had the grace to blush at her comment.

"I wanted to talk to you about your friends," he said as he reached for his drink.

"Yes, what about them?" she asked.

"You look nice today," Elliot said as if he was trying to soften her with a compliment.

"Thank you." Her smile felt forced.

Elliot took a deep breath as he looked over to where Lia, Ben, Faye, Silas, and Valentine stood sipping their mimosas and assorted drinks while they waited for a table big enough for all of them.

"I've been asking around, and I don't like what I hear," Elliot frowned. "I mean, at first, I was impressed with your friends, they all seem well off and influential, but the opposite is true."

"Oh no, they are all very rich, disgustingly so," Chloe said in a dry voice as she sipped her drink.

"It's not that. Did you know Ben killed his wife, and Valentine did some horrible things during the war, like really bad, torturing people and stuff?"

Chloe spat out her drink and started to choke at what he had said.

Elliot was completely serious. Chloe wiped her mouth.

"Ben did not kill his wife, and Valentine would never torture anyone." Well, almost anyone, she conceded silently. He was doing his best to torture her.

"You don't know that. You weren't there!" Elliot hissed, looking over his shoulder at Valentine.

"I was there." Chloe watched Elliot's eyes grow wide. "I have known Valentine and Silas for twenty years. They are skilled surgeons who save lives." As she said the words, she realized it wasn't true. Valentine wasn't a surgeon anymore, and he had taken lives.

Chloe looked over her shoulder at Valentine, whose head turned as he met her glance.

"That look right there? What is that? What's between the two of you?" Elliot asked.

"Nothing, nothing at all," Chloe said, unable to hide the bitterness in her voice. She drained her glass and then reached for her purse. "This isn't going to work between us, Elliot, so let's just cut our losses. My friends are non-negotiable, and if you feel like they will hold you back, then I think we both need to move on."

"If that's what you want," Elliot said, leaning back in his chair.

"It is," Chloe agreed, standing and heading for the door with a wave to her friends.

They waved back with concerned looks, but no one tried to stop her from leaving. She was a block from the restaurant when a hand reached out and caught her arm.

"Where are you going?" Valentine said, pulling her towards him with such force that she collided with his chest.

"I'm going to go adopt a cat!" she said, stepping away from him. He reached for her again, and she stepped back again. "Don't touch me."

"Chloe, what happened. Did you and Elliot end it?" he asked in a quiet voice.

"Yes, we did. He said Ben was a murderer, and you killed and tortured people." Chloe was swallowing hard against her tears.

"I did," Valentine said. His eyes held such sadness as he admitted it.

"Killed, sure, it's war, but torture?" Chloe shook her head in denial.

"War is torture. I was responsible for every man on the field, and not every man on the field played by the rules, which meant I was responsible."

"Did you torture anyone?" Chloe asked a direct question.

"Not hands-on, but I ordered it and was in the room when it happened," he admitted. "As a surgeon, I could picture what every punch and twist did to the person's ligaments, bones, and organs. I would watch and think about how to cause the least amount of pain to get the maximum results, but it didn't matter because it was always ugly."

Chloe could feel his pain and self-hatred as he admitted it.

"Now you can see why I don't deserve someone like you. I don't deserve to be happy." His voice was low.

"What you did, did you have a good reason for doing it, or was it just because you could?" Chloe started walking. It was too hard to look at him.

"It doesn't matter. There are all kinds of ways to justify it, trust me. I have tried them all. Most times, it was to get intel to save lives, sometimes it was intel to win a battle, but either way, it was me hurting people." He walked slowly beside her. "I am so far from who I used to be, and you deserve better than me. Am I glad you broke up with Elliot? Yes! Do I want you for myself? Yes. I want you so much, and every once and a while, I will forget about my past and only see you and my need. Then reality sets in, and I know you will never want me if you know the truth."

"So, that's why you push me away?" Chloe said with wide eyes. "What if I learned the truth, heard every gory detail, and still wanted you?" She stopped and looked up at him.

"I don't know if I'm willing to take the chance. At least now, you love who I used to be. I don't think I could handle it if you decided you couldn't love who I have become." He looked at her, brushing a strand of hair that the wind had caught out of her face.

"It could be the same for you too. I haven't been fighting a war, but I have worked in an ER for many, many years, and that can harden the most optimistic person. I'm not the shy innocent girl you once knew. I've been hit and hit back. I've cussed out more than my fair share of nasty patients, I've almost been fired more than once, I get drunk more often than I should, and my sense of humor is much lewder than it used to be. What if you miss the girl I used to be?" Chloe asked.

Valentine didn't say anything as he looked down at her.

"We're in each other's souls, Valentine." She licked her lips, and Valentine pulled at her lip with his thumb.

"There's another thing that scares me?" His eyes had darkened, and something in the vibe between them changed, causing Chloe's heart rate to accelerate.

"I used to be so gentle with you. I don't know if I could be that way again. I need more," he insisted, and Chloe stopped breathing.

Picking up his hand, she placed it above her breast, where her heart was racing. "I think at this point, after twelve years, you need anything and everything, just as I do."

Valentine's eyes grew wide, and then he smiled an honest smile that made his eyes crinkle and touched Chloe's heart while making her toes curl.

"Lewd, uh?" he asked with a squint of one eye.

"Feel that?" she asked, pressing his hand to her chest. "That's not fear making my heart beat so fast."

"So, what do you propose we do about it?" Valentine asked in a husky voice.

"Not what you think, at least not yet," Chloe gave a low laugh. "Let's go out on a date and get to know one another again. Maybe a few makeout sessions. We won't tell the others, at least not right away."

Valentine frowned, and she could tell he was overthinking again.

"You tell me the worst, and I'll tell you the worst, and then we will see if my heart still does this when you come near." Chloe insisted as she pressed his hand where it lay against her breast.

"That's attraction, Chloe. It doesn't mean that we have to like each other." He shook his head with a sad smile.

Chole closed her eyes. "This is love, Valentine. My heart has never beat this way for any other man, and after twelve years, there have been more than a few that I have found attractive, but I never wanted them. Have you ever wanted another woman?" Chloe held her breath while he answered.

Valentine shook his head. "A few beautiful women have offered over the years, and I thought I could, but when it came down to the moment of decision, I couldn't because they weren't you."

"See, it's love." Chloe stood on her tiptoes and allowed herself to kiss his cheek. He pulled her close, holding her for a long moment, her hand and his caught between them.

"Dinner at my apartment?" she asked in his ear. He smelled divine.

"No. I think we should dine out if you don't mind. It will be safer. The only thing keeping me from touching you the way I want to right now is the fact that we are in public." He let his hand wander over the curve of her hip while his other hand flipped their hands and moved them down further, causing the back of his hand to brush her breast on purpose. He stopped their hands right below her breast, and she could feel his hand pressing against her.

"I'll pick you up at seven?" he asked.

Chloe nodded, wondering how a simple touch could cause so many feelings.

"Are you still going to get a cat?" he asked as he stepped away from her.

"I'll hold off for the time being." She laughed.

"You'll tell me if you decide to get one, though?" He watched her as she tilted her head, considering him.

"Alright," she agreed. Valentine was giving her an easy way to tell him that she wasn't interested in case she changed her mind.

Chloe let her hand drift away from his as she turned to walk back to her apartment. It felt as if she was walking on air the entire way home.