𝕴𝖙'𝖘 𝕹𝖔𝖙 𝕹𝖔𝖙 𝓐 𝕷𝖚𝖓𝖈𝖍 𝕯𝖆𝖙𝖊

รɦαω

I couldn't get away from him. And lying to myself that I didn't want to be around him just made the desire to have him in my sight at always burn stronger.

There's something different about me lately. I've been prefectly content with being lonely for however many years now. But ever since Riel walk into this company, everything has changed. Now, I find myself longing to be free of solitude.

I have always managed to steer clear of the office cafeteria, never peeked inside or tasted its food. So, why on earth am I now making an appearance at a place that sells one dollar sandwiches?

It's not the place that matters, but the person whose presence made it worth something.

He did the same at my house, a place that I was starting to think I'd never laugh or even smile in. But with Riel's presence, it echoed with laughter and

its mirrors reflected my smile for the first time.

It's crazy to think that a thirty million dollar house didn't have the concern of being a home until Riel entering through its door. And it's crazy think I couldn't go back to my own house without noticing that along with the laughter and smiles, he's no longer there.

This madness had to stop, he's just my employee. I won't allow him to hold any importance pass that role in my life. Maybe I have a brain tumor, I am sure that would explain the sudden shift in my brain chemistry.

A rush of "feel-good" hormones hits me as I glance down the cafeteria.

Riel possesses some sort of charm that makes me need to be close to him. He wakes a side of me that I thought was gone, the side that craves the warmth of a hand to hold, the comfort of a hug and joy of putting a smile on someone else's face.

I sense employees giving me side-eye glances or averting their gaze as I set foot in the cafeteria. Riel was too busy watching the server assemble a hot dog to notice me. I watch how easily he leans his well–balanced silhouette over counter to collect his food and drink.

I don't know if he does it intentionally or not but he seems to only ever wear clothes that sways attention to the gracefulness and sensuality his slender frames carries.

Riel walks to find a table to eat at, the brown tweed blazer he wears, frames the confident way his shoulder move back and his gray dress pants that follow the length of his strides. A brown belt holding onto his narrow waist, doesn't let him drown into the fact that the jacket and pants aren't his size. And underneath, a white t–shirt lends him an air of effortlessness.

In the midst of moving to approach him, I feel a hard clap on my back.

"Shaw," Sebastian grins."When since did you stop eating gourmet lunches?"

"I'm not here for lunch," I grumble.

"Hmm," he considers."Then there's no reason for you to be in our boss free space." He grins.

"Your boss free space?" I ask him.

"Yes," he motions around the canteen,"this is the only place for everyone to take a break from being around you before the workday ends."

"Haha, very funny," I scoff.

I brush my brother off me, and head for the table Riel sitting cross legged at.

"Sir?" Riel looks up from toying with a condiment of mustard.

"Lunchtime is over," I tell him." I need you to get back to work." The lie escapes my lips almost too smoothly.

It's not like I could tell him the truth behind my tracking him down in his lunchtime. I'm your boss that likes keeping to himself, but I can't keep to myself unless I have my sights on you (the truth made no sense to me nor would it to him).

"No," he says, looking at the screen of his phone."It's hardly twenty minutes into my lunch." He rolls his eyes at me and continues to eat.

"I don't think you understand your job as my assistant," I lower my voice at him."You're suppose to be available to me at anytime . . . you don't have a set lunchtime."

"Sorry," he gives me an apprehensive look and packs up his lunch into his bag."I'll go wash my hands and get back to work."

He gets up, leaving his bag and turns a corner with a sign pointing towards the restroom.

"That was harsh," Sebastian mumbles suddenly."You wouldn't have let him finish his lunch?"

"Why are you concerned about things that shouldn't concern you?" I sneer at him.

"He's such a nice guy," he sighs; argues."It's a shame he has to work for a bully."

Riel comes back from the restroom and picks his bag up from the table.

"I am sure, Shaw doesn't need you that urgently. You can finish having your lunch." Sebastian urges him before he turns and nudges my side with his elbow. "Isn't that right, Shaw?"

"It's fine," Riel scoffs."I've already lost my appetite."

"Then you'll have no problem getting back to work," I turn, knowing that he's only few steps behind me.

Sebastian follows me into the elevator but Riel turns away.

"Where are you going?" I ask him.

"I am not allowed to use this elevator," he pauses," and I would rather ride the employee elevator. So sorry, but I won't be available for the next thirty seconds, if you don't mind."

I blink, suddenly taken aback by his passive aggressive tone towards me. He hasn't took me to task in a whole week.

"Mr. Summers, get in the - "

The elevator doors slid shut, cutting me off.

"You were going to let him use the elevator?" Sebastian asks.

"Yes, does it bother you ?" I scoff.

"No . . ." he murmurs."But you're the one who made up the rule that only execs could ride on this elevator."

I guess my past self never thought he would want to pass quiet moments in an elevator with an employee.

"I remember," I snap.

Sebastian chuckles."Riel is quite gusty, that was a cleverly subtle way to tell you he doesn't want ride the elevator with you."

"Sebastian," I whisper."Your phone is ringing."

His phone wasn't ringing, but telling him it was my cleverly subtle way of getting him to stop talking.

"No. . . it's not," he feels his pockets for his phone.

I am already walking off the elevator when he realizes. I steer towards the direction of my office where I notice Riel standing outside the glass doors, his expression less upset than before.

"Sir," he muses."You've work for me?" He pushes the door open and gestures for me to enter the office first, which I didn't like. I'll be the one to open the doors in our relationship. That's our boss-employee relationship, of course.

I sit around my desk and wave at my laptop."It won't stop freezing," I tell him.

"Uhm," he scoffs."I am your assistant not IT."

"So? You lied on your resume about being tech savvy ?" I mouth.

"I didn't," he retorts."I'll have a look."

"Excuse me," he says, he tries to push my chair to the side but fails.

"You'll be able to look at it without me moving," I voice in a harsh whisper.

"Fine," he says and takes a hesitant step toward me. It's not like him to be this panicky.

"I won't get angry if you come near me," I reassure him.

I would prefer if he did. He steps a bit more lively towards my desk. His leg brushes at the arm of charm with me in it.

"If you say so," he mumbles under his breath.

He draws to the foot of the desk for a closer look at the crashing laptop.

"You've like a hundred different apps running at the same time," he laughs softly."No wonder it's freezing."

Reil leans onto the desk, hovering the length his body over my lap as he lowers himself to the desk with his eyes fixed firmly on the laptop screen inches away from his face. I watch his brows furrowing in concentration as he taps away at the keyboard, but I am interested watching the reflection of him biting his lips.

As he lends all his focus my technical issues, he unwittingly inches closer to me. So close that I could no longer ignore his pert backend. I sneakily open my palm out behind him even it's just to pretend I've some right to smack his bowed bum.

"Is there anything open on here," Riel's voice brings my wondering eye back to his face,"you want saved?"

I look at the laptop."Yeah," I say, "this contract right here." I point to where on screen the PDF file is open.

"Okay," he gives a faint smile. His full, rounded two-toned lips that danced between shades of deep toffee and a delicate pink of rose petals.

Hunger ravages me the more I mull over his lips. It's as if they're begging me to taste the softness, passion and the promise sweetness Riel is hiding from me.

I didn't think this young man had any clue on how much of my day I spend thinking about; admiring; desiring him.

"Just . . . how old are you ?" I blurt out.

Riel turns to me."I am twenty-one and a half," he blinks.

Couldn't he have tried to be an older twenty? Maybe then I wouldn't have to feel like a dirty old man about my attraction towards him.

"And a half ?" I grin."Who says that?" I ask him.

"I do," he retorts."And you can't fire me from my job for being young."

I scoff at his words. "Do I look like a man that's petty enough to fire you for being young ?"

He gives me a look that says 'yes', "then why is my age important to you?"

"No reason," I say.

"Sure," he mouths and goes back to staring at the laptop.

He has his elbow bent on the desk, a pendant in the shape of a miniature elephant dangles from his neck.

I don't what comes over me but I find myself trailing a finger along the span of his elbow. His rich and silky skin is a deep sepia with a soft, golden glow.

"Aah," Riel reels back, staring at me."It shouldn't freeze anymore." His pupils dilate as he steps away from me.

"Y-You, um, should get a technician to u-upgrade your storage." He stutters before quickly weaving out of the office.

─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ───

A week ago, Riel touched my face to wipe fresh cream from my mustache and I didn't mind. I quite enjoyed the affection. But now, after I touched him, he's gone silent.

I may have wrongly let myself believe that there's some mutual emotional intimacy growing between us.

I am such a fool - Why would I even let myself think his gesture meant his affection?

"Sir . . . Mr. Harlow . . . Sir," Riel calls out to get my attention.

"I heard you the first time," I growl at him.

"Did you really?" He retorts."Anyways the car is here."

It's makes sense he would break his vow of silence to sass me.

I see Riel's hand extending to open the door so I stride past him and swing the car door open.

"Get in," I tell him in a sharp tone.

He looks at me amused before he gets into the back seat. I take a moment to allow myself to be intoxicated by the rousing scent that lingers in the air after him before getting in the car.

I don't bother to close the door behind me as I let myself fall back against the leather upholstered car seat. There is nothing I could do but fill my senses with seductive scent that hangs over Riel. He is near me and I feel at peace, like the calm after the rain. With each breath, I drank in his scent, the sweet scent of fresh rain and sunshine.

"Sir?" Riel interrupts my half conscious state."Are you ok?"

"No," I sigh."I am a thirsty man." I tell him.

"Should I go get a bottle of water for you?" He asks me.

"That won't help me." I groan.

I want to tell him that I ache for his attention. And that I want badly for him to climb onto my lap and allow me to nuzzle into his neck, so I could get high off his scent. But he wouldn't be able to understand the thirst he afflicts me with.

"Okay," Riel frowns, a delicate crease knoting his brows.

After a silent drive, we arrive outside a Japanese restaurant on Columbus Circle.

"Mr. Harlow, it's great-t to see - " the hostess pause in her greeting to look at Riel."And company ?" she gasps.

I did spend so much time eating alone that it's so surprising I would bring someone here to have lunch with me ?

The young hostess finally pauses her disbelief and leads us toward a small dining room separated from the rest of the busy restaurant by bright shoji screens.

"Take your s-shoes off," I try to say to Riel but he's already has his shoes off and is stepping onto the tatami mat.

He looks back sharply at me."Is there anything that you would like me to do before your guests arrive?" he asks.

"What guests?" I ask him.

He glances from me to the table in the middle of the room and then back at me again."The guests coming to your lunch meeting?"

"It's a lunch date," I say.

"A lunch date ?" he scoffs.

"No, this is not a date." I say, panicked.

"It's, um, just lunch with me and you."

He tilts his head to the side, a perplexed expression drums on his face."Sir?"

"It's just lunch, Summers. Don't think too much into it." I sigh.

He doesn't agrue back since a waiter comes to get our order.

"You can order anything you like. I'll be one paying." I tell Riel.

"Well since you're offering," he smiles.

"I'll have the tofu dengaku for starter, followed by the wagyu beef stake, the matcha cheesecake and the best sake you've got."

The waiter eyes him suspiciously.

"Don't worry," I say to the waiter."He's twenty-one and a half. And I'll get the same order as him."

"Of course, Mr. Harlow." He says and leaves."Hārō-san ga dēto?" He doesn't even try to get far enough from the door before indicating his suprise that I could be on a date in Japanese.

"You should've told him that I am just your assistant." Riel voices.

"Why?" I ask,"that's not really any of his business."

"But - "

"But nothing," I interrupt him.

"So, you're going to let him think this is a date ?" He asks me.

"Who says he thinks this is a date?" I retort.

"Hārō-san ga dēto?" he repeats." I am sure that means, Mr. Harlow, on a date? in Japanese."

I give him an impressed look."Where did you learn Japanese?"

"My grandmother is half Japanese," he answers.

"Nihon ni itta koto ga arimasu ka? (Have you ever been to Japan?)" I ask him.

"Īe (No)", he says,"demo watashi wa Kyōto de obaachan ni ai ni iku tame ni chokin shiteimasu (but I am saving up to visit my grandma in Kyoto.)"

"I have a private jet," I blurt."I'll let you borrow it."

"Hmph," he snarks."Because you just lend your employees your private jet."

"You're the only exception," I tell him.

He eyes me for a long moment, as if he doesn't believe me. He goes to say something but the waiter comes back , setting plates down with a gentle clink onto the table.

"Arigatou," Riel thanks the waiter.

He puts a pair of chopsticks between his fingers and places a bite of glazed tofu between his lips. Unlike the last time we had lunch together, he isn't shy about eating as much as he can.

He eats quietly not minding me while I admire the cute way he wrinkles his nose when he tries the spicy and sour sauce.

"It's not polite to stare," Riel murmurs.

"Of course." I say. "Sorry," I move my eyes off him and go back to slicing my stake into strips.

I try not to stare at him but I see him from the corners of my eye, pouring sake into an ochoko once for me then himself.

Riel sips the sake, and his eyes flicker with delight."It's so good." He cheers.

I smile,"I hope so, you ordered most thousand dollar

bottle."

"A thousand dollars?" he gulps."I am sorry, sir. I didn't know. You can take the money back from my paycheck for the next two weeks." He sets his cup of sake aside.

"Don't be ridiculous, Summers." I say to him."I am not so awful. Now, drink your sake without fussing."

"Okay," he says as he shyly places the ochoko back at his lips.

The bill for lunch comes and I slip my credit card between the book, passing it off to the waiter.

"Gochisosama!" Riel thanks me for the delicious meal.

"Dou itashimashite (You're welcome)," I tell him.

We leave the restaurant but the driver isn't outside, which I would've usually found upsetting me but it's my chance to be with Riel outside of work for a while longer.

Riel breaks the quiet between us,"You didn't say how you learned Japanese."

"My mother's third or fourth husband was Japanese," I tell him."So, I lived in Japan for two years as a child."

"Third or fourth?" he laughs.

"She got married five times after my dad so I lost count," I whisper.

"She sounds interesting," he says.

"She's a little too interesting," I grin at his assessment of my mother.

The smile on my face starts to fade as I glimpse the car fast approaching us.

I sigh, discontented with my luck. Riel is very chatty after a drink, I'll make a note to take him out more often.

"Oh my gosh," Riel squeals."I should get that hat."

He holds onto my arms and pulls me with him in the direction of a street vendor selling bohemian clothing at the roadside.

"Let me see that hat," he tells the man operating the stall.

The man nods, and hands him the hat. He inspects rust knitted colored beret before reaching into his pocket and pays the man for it.

He lifts the beret over head and fixes the brim to lay flat a few inches away from where his hairline starts. He tilts his head slightly to side and uses his finger to pull a some of the silky locs from back his head to frame his face.

He smiles at me then asks me for my opinion."How does it look?"

"You look . . ." the response chokes in my thoart as a wave of heat courses through me as I try understand how he could be so captivating,"it looks great."

I need him to be mine so bad, it hurts.

"Good," he beams and turns to check the other stuff the man has displayed.

He picks a bracelet and necklace from the tons the man has lined out on the stall. He ties the tiger eye necklace around his neck then checks himself out in a small spoty mirror hanging to the side.

He tries on a few unique looking rings before he pays the man for the assortment of jewelry.

I think Riel might be a bit of a hippie.

Just when I believed the torment of my senses has halted, Riel leans in, taking my hand to fold down my jacket cuff and fastens the bracelet around my wrist.

"It looks nice on you," he notes."Keep it, it's a gift," he says."What am I even saying?" He laughs sadly. "A man like you won't even think to keep a cheap thing like this."

His tone gets dispirited and my chest falls at the thought.

"I'll cherish it," I whisper."Thank you."

─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ───

I sink into bed with my left arm above me, my finger traces lightly along the span of the reddish-brown gemstones of bracelet around my wrist.

Riel doesn't know how priceless this bracelet he called a cheap thing is to me. It's not that I haven't gotten a gift before, but there's something about the unfeigned simplicity of this gift from him that captures my soul.

It like Riel is writing the book on how to win my heart in ten easy steps and he doesn't even know it.

I am about to grab my phone to call Riel, just to hear his voice before I go to bed. I have grown a bit tired of listening to his voice on recording. I had a speech to give at an event and I asked Riel to record it in his voice since I am an audio learner and I figured hearing it would help me remember better. Yet, little did I anticipate that my simple idea would spiral into an sly way for me to have him with me late at night.

I know that it's an inappropriate and pathetic thing to do but I couldn't help myself. At least, I haven't done anything sexual while listening to playing or I wouldn't be able to face him in the eye at work.

If I call him now, I could find some lie as to why I was calling him.

"Shaw?" I hear Mallory's voice and banging on the front door.

I drop my phone and head downstairs to answer the door.

"Mallory?" I open the door.

It must be an emergency for her to pay a visit me this late or at all.

"I have been knocking down the door for minutes now," she hisses." Didn't you come sooner." She steps into the apartment.

"I didn't hear you." I tell her.

"Whatever," she shoves her massive coat in my hands."We've a problem."

I hang up her coat."What problem?" I ask her with my back turned.

"My ganddad wants us to announce that we're having our wedding in six months." She scoffs in a bitter tone.

I hurl around at her statement."We can't do that," I shout.

Mallory's lip press into a thin line and the muscles of her face tensed. "What do you mean we can't?" She asks.

"I mean," I scratch my head,"maybe we shouldn't be lying to our families about our relationship."

She grins a bit, "When since have you grown morals?"

"Since, I have decided that I want to be happy." I tell her.

"Happy?" She rasps.

Mallory is my childhood friend. She has to see I want to be happy.

"You've a girlfriend that you love," I tell her."And you both are so happy each other and I want the same for myself."

"So . . . you're jealous?" She asks.

"Yes," I tell her.

"You're jealous that I am in love with

someone that's not you?" She scowls.

"No," I reply." Of course not . . . it's not about you being in love with someone else. It's just that I would like to have someone that I can be in love with. I want to be happy with someone."

I can't say when my love for Mallory turned platonic, but it's between Riel becoming my employee and me realizing that my first love didn't have to be my last.

"I am not exactly happy," she cries."I have to hide who I am from my entire family because my granddad is never going to let me have my inheritance if he finds out that the little girl he raised is gay."

"We could speak to him," I consider. "Maybe he'll change his mind about the conditions to your inheritance."

"Are you freaking crazy?" She yells at me."The old man is set in his ways, he not going to understand anything."

"Calm down," I say softly."If he doesn't understand, I'll help you get the best attorney money can buy and we'll fight for your inheritance in court."

"You want me to take my granddad to court?" She sobs."What's wrong with you?"

I know she's angry but I don't feel any quilty.

"Nothing is wrong with me." I tell her.

"Are you seeing someone?" She asks.

"Is that the reason you're robbing me of my inheritance?" She asks louder.

"I am not robbing you of anything." I yell.

"Just tell me who this woman you're seeing is," she sighs."I'll talk to her, I am sure we can work something."

"I am not seeing anyone," I rasp.

"You're a liar," Mallory curses."How can you be so selfish to go back on your promise?"

She shoves my shoulder."I didn't let you fetishize my sexuality, so you're turning your back on me." She rants.

"Wow," I sneer at her."I can't believe that's what you think of me." I open back the door.

I pull her coat off the rack and hand it to her."I think you should leave." I tell her.

She walks out and I hold onto to the doorknob, hesitating to close the door in face of the woman that for years has been the center of world.