In Your Dreams, Holden Rhodes: Chapter 22

I WOKE up the next morning with rocks in my brain. A dull, thudding ache sat right behind my eyes. My limbs were sluggish. The light seared my eyes and I squinted.

A heavy arm draped over my waist. A big, warm, hard body curled around me. My pulse skyrocketed.

Holy shit. There was a man in my bed. My other eye opened wide. I was in my bra and underwear under the covers.

Even through my cloudy-headed haze, I noticed the thick length pressing in my backside. My eyes went even wider.

Did I—? My mouth went dry. Did I hook up with someone last night? Holden would have watched me leave with someone. I didn’t like the devastating ache in my chest at that idea.

Moving slow so I wouldn’t wake whoever he was, I turned my head.

Holden.

He was still asleep. He was over the covers so the blankets separated us but I sank back into the bed with shock and his arm tightened around my waist, pulling me harder onto his erection.

I was in bed with Holden, half naked, and he had a boner. This was like a fucked up game of Clue. In Katherine’s old bedroom with the hot grumpy guy who has major morning wood.

A rush of heat grew between my legs and I froze. My skin prickled hot but my head was still pounding so it might have been the hangover.

I had to get out of here.

“Holden.” I slapped his arm. “Holden, wake up. Someone roofied you and deposited you in my bed.”

He groaned and gave me one more squeeze before he frowned and opened his eyes. His eyes were bleary, his hair unruly, and he looked so sexy, sleepy, and delicious.

He let me go and jerked back on the bed like I burned him.

“Good morning, Coyote Ugly.” His voice was low and hoarse with sleep and I twinged again between my legs. His gaze dropped to my chest before he rubbed a hand over his face. I twinged again.

Stop that, I told my ladyparts.

“I wasn’t aware the Sasquatch slept. I thought he did all his skulking in the forest at night,” I said, pulling the covers up high on my chest. My face warmed. “So, awkward question. Did we—?” I made a hand motion between us.

I didn’t know what I wanted the answer to be. If we did, well, that would make things awkward. Also, if Holden and I had sex, I wanted to be present and remember it.

He grimaced. “No.”

A lick of disappointment hit me at his expression. “You don’t need to act all repulsed by me.”

I’d admit I was curious how it would be with us. He had kissed me like he wanted me, and I couldn’t help but picture him moving over top of me while I moaned. I replayed him gripping my hips hard and groaning over and over again.

“You were blackout drunk,” he told me.

“What?” I blanched in shock. “No, I wasn’t. All I drank were those cordial things. I only had three or four.”

“No,” he said, “You had like eight. And cordial is liqueur. And then you did three tequila shots.”

Ooooh. The music. Dancing. Laughing with Olivia. Olivia asking me how many I had drank.

I cringed. “I got drunk.”

He nodded, eyes on my face, expression indiscernible. “Yep.”

“What else did I do?”

He sat up fast. “Nothing. I stayed because I didn’t want you to choke on your own vomit.”

“Nice.” I gave him a thumbs up. The morning boner meant nothing. “Really nice.” I rolled over with the full intention of sleeping for six years.

“Hey.” He patted my leg. “Get up.”

“Don’t you have a job to go to?” I mumbled into the pillows.

“We’re finishing the bathrooms today.”

I raised my head with a questioning glance. “It’s Monday. You don’t take days off.”

He exhaled a frustrated breath. “I moved some things around.” He wouldn’t meet my eyes. “It’s fine.” His phone buzzed in his pocket.

“Aren’t you going to get that?”

“I’m going to get coffee and breakfast and when I get back, I want you in the shower.”

I pictured Holden and I in the shower, him pinning me against the tiles with his hips, bucking into me while I gasped and came all over the thick length pressed into me this morning.

A rush of heat hit me between the legs and I stared at him.

He rolled his eyes. “You know what I mean.” He disappeared out the door and stomped down the stairs. “Ten minutes,” he called up the stairs.

“Mhm,” I mumbled back, already falling back asleep.

“ANOTHER PACKAGE CAME FOR YOU.”

An hour later, Holden set a box down on my bed as I sipped the coffee he had brought me. He wore a knowing, smug expression.

“Might help you feel better,” he added before he walked down the hall, where he was working on one of the bathrooms while hollering at me to get dressed.

I gave him a strange look as he left before I ripped the box open.

Oh. The company had sent a replacement vibrator. The box had the same red heart pattern as the previous box, so he must have put two and two together.

A wicked idea entered my head of me using the vibe while Holden worked in the bathroom a few rooms away. Heat coursed through me and I squeezed my thighs together.

I shook my head. Wow. We weren’t going there. Not today, Sadie. Not today.

Would be fun to see his face as I announced to him I wasn’t to be disturbed, though. I snorted.

“You better be getting ready in there,” I heard him call from the other room.

I rolled my eyes and headed to the shower.

An hour later, Holden and I entered the forest beside the inn. I sipped the coffee he had brought me.

“Thanks for doing this,” I told him with a small smile. “I know you wanted to do renos today. I’m just feeling blah.”

He nodded. “I know. It’s okay.”

He watched me for a moment. His hair was damp. He must have run home to take a shower. I pictured him under the spray, water rolling down his abs. I didn’t know he had abs, but I felt his chest that night we kissed. His body was incredible.

Internally, I sighed at the memory of the kiss. What a waste of a kiss. So hot and yet it was going nowhere. It was like a little tease from the universe, so fleeting and unfair.

He led me deeper into the forest along the trail and I stared up at the looming trees, craning my neck to see way up. I inhaled the humid, clean forest and let the breath out as a sigh. Even along the trail, I could still hear the ocean from the other side of the inn.

“Where are we going?” I asked him.

He tucked his hands into the pockets of his black parka. “This trail goes into the forest and loops around. Figured we’d do the whole loop or turn back if we got tired.”

“How long is the loop?”

The corner of his mouth moved and his eyes glinted. “If I told you, you wouldn’t want to do it.”

I groaned.

“If you get tired, I’ll carry you.” The corner of his mouth twitched more, and I watched, fascinated.

What would it take to get a full smile out of him? I bet Holden’s smile was blinding. The laugh he had let out when he saw my panting of him was more in disbelief. I wanted the real thing.

I breathed in another breath of fresh air. It was like the forest air was giving my energy back. “It’s nice in here.”

Holden made a noise of acknowledgement in his throat.

We passed a cluster of trees and an idea formed in my head. I grinned.

“What’s that look?” Holden asked and I grinned wider.

“Just daydreaming.”

He nudged me with his elbow. “Tell me.”

“Did you ever have a treehouse growing up?”

He shook his head, eyebrows lifting with curiosity.

“Me neither. I always wanted one but there was no tree in our backyard growing up. It would be cool to have a treehouse out here for the inn, but for adults.”

Our shoes made soft noises on the path as we walked and the idea became clearer in my head.

“Okay, if I had a bazillion dollars,” I told Holden while he listened, “this is what I’d do. There’s this bar in Toronto Willa and I go to all the time. Tiny little place. It’s at the back of a restaurant and it doesn’t even have a name. No one really knows about it, which is part of the appeal. Behind the bar is a wall of windows, and when you sit at the counter, sipping your cocktail, you can look out at all the city lights. Three million people in Toronto, eating dinner in their kitchens, taking the bus home from work, walking to meet friends, grocery shopping. It’s like, everyone is the star of their own story, you know?”

I looked up at him and he studied me with a thoughtful expression.

“I love going there with Willa. We sit and chat and look out at the lights and feel so small and insignificant, like our problems aren’t so important in the big scheme of things.” I shrugged. “Maybe I’m missing Toronto, but it would be cool to do a little bar out in the woods.”

“You want to do a bar in the middle of the woods?” Holden’s eyebrows shot up. Beside us, a squirrel chased another up a tree.

“I know, I know.” I rolled my eyes. “It’s insane. It’s just a daydream. I think it would be fun, especially because we’re doing the secret library so we have the whole whimsical getaway thing going for the inn.” I surveyed the forest around us. “I get that city lights vibe here, funny enough. These trees are hundreds of years old. They’ve seen lots of people walk by, thinking about their own problems, and yet the trees are still standing.”

Emotion stung my eyes and I blinked it away.

“It’s like my problems don’t matter as much here,” I told him, laughing a little. “Which is crazy.”

“It’s not.” He shook his head. “I like that about the forest, too. It’s quiet, and everything grows around each other in harmony.” He shrugged. “And it smells nice in here.”

I laughed. “It smells really, really good in this forest, but that might be partly due to you.”

He gave me a strange look.

“You smell good,” I explained.

“Really.” He sounded like he didn’t believe me.

I nodded. “Yep. Don’t let it get to your head, though.”

He snorted.

We walked for a few more minutes in silence, and maybe it was the walk or the coffee hitting my bloodstream or the clean forest air, but I perked up. I didn’t even mind the elevation gain as the trail led up into the mountain. Spending time in the forest with Holden cleared my head and put a brighter shine on my mood.

“There’s a painting of this forest at the gallery,” Holden said.

“Oh, yeah?”

He nodded. “I was going to take you there.” He cleared his throat. “On our date.” He glanced at my face and then back at the path. “It’s by a local Indigenous artist. She does a lot of pieces inspired by this area. I like her work.”

“That sounds really cool. I’ll have to swing by and check it out.”

He nodded and continued walking in silence.

“Why do you like art?” I asked, because one crumb of information about Holden wasn’t enough. I wanted him to keep talking about himself.

He glanced at me. In the forest light, Holden looked so handsome, like he wasn’t even real. Like I had imagined him. His skin glowed, his eyes were so clear and bright, and I could smell him—a mix of deodorant and laundry soap and a bit of sweat from working. That scent was like the cordial drinks I chugged last night—addictive and totally intoxicating.

A twinge hit me in the chest. Whoever got Holden was a lucky lady.

“Art makes me feel connected to other people.” He thought about it for a second, frowning a little. “It’s like what you said about that bar. I look at some paintings and I feel small and insignificant, but in a connected way. People are not that different, no matter the time period or where they live or how much money they have. The most famous paintings explore the things that make us human.”

“Like what?” I breathed.

Please keep talking.

“Like…” He hummed, thinking. “Like being in awe of the beauty of nature. Or being in love with someone who doesn’t love you back. Or the unfairness of privilege, or how devastating war and death is.” He shrugged and lifted his eyebrows at me. “Or revenge on the guy that pissed you off.”

A laugh burst out of me and he grinned.

Oh, wow.

Holden was already gorgeous. When he smiled, though?

He took my breath away.