Chapter 16

Hullo there!

SHOUTOUT TO cute-_-gal! YOUR AN AWESOME.. UHM.. POTANA (Its like a Potato, and a Banana, cause I didn't know which one to call you. That's a compliment just BTW haha)

1: Does anyone wanna make me a book cover? Cause my skills in that department are kinda dry... lemme know in the comments or by direct message if you're interested :)

2. So you guys really gotta START ANSWERING MY QUESTIONS.

IF you read the last authors note my answer is:

I'm a Kiss-Virgin thing, never been kissed and not planning on being anytime soon ;)

Hmm so here's Chapter 16 cause I still luv youu..

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-Jesse's POV-

Dinner consisted of light awkward small talk.

The topics varied from the weather, to how businesses are run to collect money for the pack. That, and a whole lot of awkward silences and taps of cutlery against plates in between.

Theodore and Mum kept exchanging glances, linking to each other.

Valerie had finished her food, and was twiddling her thumbs under the table.

I leaned my head down a bit, to whisper in her ear unnoticeably.

'You a bit bored Val?'

She halted for a moment, before nodding shyly.

'Kinda' She whispered back.

'I know how you feel. This is pretty boring' I exaggerated a silent yawn, rolling my eyes towards my mum and Theodore.

Valerie threw her hand over her mouth, stiffling her giggles.

Christan shot me a confused look, after checking none of our parents had looked up at us. They were so engrossed in their own conversation, its like we weren't sitting at the table opposite them.

'Do you wanna play Dumb Ways To Die on Tyler?' I whispered, pulling my phone out from my pocket.

It was the only game I had.

'Who's Tyler?' Val whispered in reply, looking towards the door.

'This' I said, holding up my phone.

'Is Tyler James, the most trustworthy buddy you could ever have. My only love' I brought my phone to my lips, pecking him lightly.

Valerie giggled, taking Tyler as I handed him to her.

'Your so silly Mummy' She whispered.

'I know' I smiled down at her, looking back up at the table.

Mum was staring straight at me.

Not in a scolding way, or in a Smiley way.

Just blankly.

Theodore cleared his throat, making our eyes snap up to him.

'Before we remind the pack; stay safe in the woods. There has recently been an anonymous threat, so be careful when outside. We are still debating whether school should be permitted from next week onwards' Theodore said.

'So no school? That's ridiculous Dad! Alot of us are in our Senior year!' Christan read my mind perfectly, speaking up to what I was just about to say.

'Yes but this threat is like none we have received before. If an action is taken from their side, we will be forced to prepare for war' He said, cutting a slice of meat off his plate casually.

'Fine' Christan mumbled, playing with the food on his plate.

I shared a look with Christan.

"Should we-"

"Not yet" He replied.

We both looked back down at our food.

The awkward silence fell again, and I was beginning to get irritated.

I pushed my chair out, standing up from my seat.

'Well I'm not going to lie and say this has been fun, so if the rest of dinner is going to be you two linking while we sit here in an awkward silence I'd prefer to be playing Call of Duty in my room. Shall I take my daughter and leave or is something eventful going to take place?' I questioned both of them.

'Jess wait. Baby we.. I got you here to apologize. I'm sorry I overreacted, when she wasn't even your child. You did what was best for Valerie, and I really am proud of you for stepping up to the challenge.' Mum stopped, and turned to look at Christan.

'Both of you. You'll make great parents for her' Her lips curled into a smile.

I smiled back, unable to be mad anymore. We both stood up and hugged it out.

I had missed my mothers arms. She was my mum after all.

'Im Bethanny, Jess' mum. I guess you can call me grandma if you like though. What's your name?' My mum bent down to Valerie, who immediately took to hugging onto my right leg.

She was nervous.

'Valerie' She whispered, almost impossible to hear.

She hugged onto me tighter.

'Nice to meet you Valerie' My mum smiled, holding out her hand to my daughter.

Valerie immediately shot her eyes up to me.

I could almost hear her anger towards my mother. Could she sense my anger towards my mother before? Is this why she felt the need to stand by me?

I bent down to her level.

'Val, she's not a bad guy. I'm not angry with her anymore' I chuckled lightly.

'Oh' She smiled, immediately turning back to my mother.

'Nice to meet you as well too' Valerie took my mothers hand, shaking it.

'So tell me all about you Valerie!' My mum exclaimed, over excited.

I giggled a little at her excitement, happy that my mother accepted the situation.

I was kind of done being mad at her anyway, its not like I hadn't already forgiven her.

'Um.. I'm Valerie and I'm 4 years old' Valerie held up four fingers, making me smile.

I'm glad.

'Jesse!' Theodore's voice rang joyfully behind me, making me turn around swiftly.

He beckoned for me, a large grin on his face.

He pulled his arm off Christan's shoulder, shooing him off to Valerie and my mum.

I was about to blurt "Well don't you two seem chummy again" out loud, but I decided against it.

'Hey Theodore' I waved awkwardly, walking up closer to him.

'Sorry about everything Jesse, I did do most of the convincing when it came to your mother though' He smiled.

'No worries, and thanks' I replied.

'But to think of it! You and my boy?' He chuckled light heartedly.

My face was struggling not to fall flat into an emotionless mask.

I started to feel queasy.

'You'd never to that to her! Of course you knew.. well know how upset she'd be! Because you know, she worked so hard for this family to be right without instability straight away' Theodore stated.

I really wasn't feeling too good.

'She has been trying so hard.. which is why she did blow out of proportion with Valerie and things. Plus there are the opinions of others that cant be taken lightly as Christan is to be Alpha. And it is just plain wrong.' He listed one after another.

I feel really really sick right now.

'But you knew that, you're such a good daughter, helping your mum out like that so she can be happy again. Good on ya' He patted my back lightly.

If he had patted any harder, I would have thrown up.

'Yeah.. I guess' I mumbled out, clearing my throat.

Aint that just a hard assed reminder.

I can't believe I let Christan come even remotely close to me.

Now, instead of having just my soul, he stole my heart and occupies the thoughts in my mind.

'You okay Jesse? You look a bit pale' Theodore immediately placed the back of his palm to my forehead, as if by instinct.

I felt kind of awkward about the whole thing, even though I felt on the brink of bringing up breakfast, lunch and dinner of yesterday and today.

'You're a bit hot too' He furrowed his eyebrows in concern, the way Christan does.

'I'm just a tad queasy, I'm sure I'll be fine' I forced a smile into my face, using my eyes to kindly tell him to move his hand off my forehead.

He did as I silently asked, and removed his hand from my forehead.

We all went back to the dinner table, because Mum came out with a steamy hot chocolate hot lava cake. Valerie's sleepy eyes immediately widened, sitting up straight.

I had to force a smile on my face when the cake was cut open, the sweet chocolate rushing all round the serving plate. It looked so bloody amazing and smelled so good, but I just felt even worse.

My stomach was churning, and all the smell was to me was sickly sweet. My mouth didn't fill with druel, instead, filled with horrible bile.

Everytime I swallowed it back, the more would come.

Mum served Valerie her cake, which she attacked. Her face was already covered with chocolate sauce by her first bite, licking her lips at the taste.

'Its so good' Was what I could make out from her cake filled speech.

I couldn't shake Christan's happy presence beside me.

I didn't want to run off to the bathroom, because I didn't want to cause a scene, but I knew if I so much as opened my mouth to speak I would throw up.

As I stared down at my serving of what looked like a truly great tasting chocolate moulten lava cake, I couldn't bring myself to eat it.

I swallowed hard.

'Um.. I need the um.. loo cause you know.. yeah' I stuttered, closing my mouth immediately again.

I pushed away from my seat, and speed walked away from the table as fast as I could. As soon as I knew I was out of line of vision, I sprinted upstairs, clasping my hand over my mouth.

I shoved open my bedroom door, rushing to the bathroom and flipping up the toilet seat.

My hair revolved around my face as soon as I knelt in front of the toilet, in the way of where the puke coming up through my throat was going to fall. I couldn't stop it though.

As I opened my mouth to puke my guts out, a hand swiftly grabbed my hair from both sides and held it behind my back. I barely noticed, all I could think about was the vomit falling into the toilet.

I felt disgusting.

His large hand rubbed my back comfortingly. I knew it was him because of the sparks his hands shot out, making me feel even more tingly.

I puked again.

After hovering over the toilet for a minute and not puking my guts out again, I spat the remainder of the horrible taste in my mouth in the toilet.

I used my hands to push myself up off the bathroom floor, flushing the toilet. Christan followed my every move, using his spare hand to rub my shoulders comfortingly.

The bad thing was I loved it.

I went to the sink and washed my face of the left over spills. I brought my face up to look in the mirror above me.

I could see Christan holding my shoulder and hair from hair behind me, looking straight at me through the mirror with concern. He took both his hands off me, bringing them to the front of my face. He dug his fingers into the front of my hair so I could feel his touch on my scalp, combing my hair back properly.

'I.. thanks' I almost sighed, taking the slightest step forward so his frame wouldn't be so close to mine.

I didnt look back up at the mirror to see him, and averted my mind towards my toothbrush in front of me.

I picked it up and squirted toothpaste on it, popping it inside my mouth. Like he wasn't behind me at all.

I finished brushing my teeth and cleaned up, taking the face towel on the sink to clean up the water on my face.

Just as I was about to move away from the sink, his hands grabbed onto my waist, pulling me to his frame. He nuzzled his face into my neck, breath fanning on the delicate skin. It was sending electricity sparking through the joints in my bones.

'Whats wrong Jay' He mumbled into my skin.

I tensed immediately.

'Im fine. I'm going to go get Valerie, she's probably done' I said with no emotion, pushing his hands off my waist.

His warmth left me immediately.

'Woah hey' He pulled my hand back as I began walking away, tugging me back.

'1: You run off to puke your guts out. 2: I help you and you wont tell me what's going on? 3: You of all people know Valerie is definitely not finished with that cake yet. What's happening Jay? You were fine just before'

His somewhat thick dark brown eyebrows were furrowed under his scattered hair, searching for an answer with his pleading eyes.

My eyes fell to the floor.

'I told you. I'm fine' I said, hoping he would just leave me alone.

I shouldn't be doing any of this with him.

He groaned out loud, pulling me closer to him.

'I hate it when you do this' He frowned, lacing his fingers through mine.

'Youre freely accepting me one moment, and I think we're doing pretty well. But then something always happens, you shut me out again and pretend like we have nothing all over again'

Dammit. I'm bloody bipolar aren't I?

'We don't have anything' I said, despite off what he just told me.

'Its like you love proving me right, and not yourself' He chuckled, spinning his and my linked arm over my head.

I spun round, straight into his chest.

'Do not!' I exclaimed in protest, glaring him down.

He simply chuckled again, swaying lightly so we were dancing.

'Why are we dancing? There's no music! Christan!' I protested, frustrated with him.

'There isn't a rule saying you cant dance without music' He replied simply, spinning me around again.

'There should be' I muttered under my breath.

He turned me back into him, but I tripped over my own feet and fell into his chest.

I could feel his heartbeat, the rise of his chest when he breathed it. It was calming.

He lifted my arms and put them over his shoulders, bringing his hands to hold me by my waist.

I felt like nothing could touch me when he held me. He was mine forever, and I didn't even know why.

'Why do you keep trying when you know I'll keep shooting you down?' I mumbled, getting myself lost in his eyes.

I dont deserve what he does for me. That he hasn't given up yet.

'Any moment with you, even if its only for a bit, is worth it' He said softly.

My stomach fluttered.

He slowly leaned down to me, till his forehead rested lightly on mine. I could feel his breath on mine, sending tingles through my skin.

He was going to kiss me.

I wanted him to kiss me.

But.. he shouldn't. For the better of someone else, I need to give up my desires.

I held two fingers to his lips, coming between us both as I stepped back.

'We cant' I whispered softly, taking another step back from him.

'Well.' He paused.

He was silent for a bit, his head hung towards the floor.

Then he looked up, fire igniting in his eyes.

'Why the bloody hell not? Why can't you just be with me?' He raised his voice slightly with frustration.

'Because I shouldn't be' I replied.

'You are my mate! Everything points to us being together! Why can't you just accept me?' He looked desperate now.

'You aren't my mate'

'Lying isnt a good trait' He grabbed my hands.

'I can feel the electricity affecting you' His thumb brushed over my knuckles, sending small shocks raging through my nerves.

'What are you.. what are you doing?' I tried not to let my eyes follow to our hands.

'I can feel the goosebumps on your skin' He walked closer to me, brushing his bare arm against mine.

Proving his point that goosebumps were rising on my bare arm.

'Christan-' I started my sentence, but couldn't finish it.

Because my breath hitched in my throat.

His hand was now on my lower back, playing with the hem of my shirt. His fingers kept brushing against my skin.

'I can feel the shiver down your spine' He ran his whole hand along my back, bringing it up.. and back down.

'I can hear your heartbeat racing' His other hand went to my heart, feeling the way it was beating at triple the speed it should be.

"I can hear the way you think about me" His voice played only in my head, like smooth chocolate.

He maneuvered me back into the position we were in, just as we almost-kissed.

'And nobody else in the universe can do this to you, because you are my mate' He whispered, sending my stomach into a frenzy.

I stayed quiet.

Maybe if I thought of something else hard enough I could forget about him.

Like..

'I'm pretty sure Channing Tatum could do it. Have you seen the body on that man?'

He squeezed my waist slightly.

'Youre crazy if you think I'm ever going to let any man close enough to let you think about them the way you think about me' He frowned.

'What if I'm gay? Then what?' I teased him even more.

'You wouldn't be enjoying this position as much then would you?'

'Who said I'm enjoying it?'

'Has anyone ever told you, you're bloody stubborn?'

'Am not!'

'Even with everything, you still won't admit that I'm your mate'

'I am not stubborn!'

'You are!'

'IM NOT. YOU ARE NOT MY MATE'

'The fact that you said that sentence makes you more stubborn'

'I'm not stubborn!'

'Prove it. Kiss me'

'Like hell I will!'

'Told you!'

'I am not stubborn!'

'The only way your gonna prove it is if you kiss me'

'I dont need to prove myself to you'

'Only cause youre too stubborn to do it'

'Oh yeah? I'm too stubborn?'

'Yeah. You are'

'Im so stubborn I'll keep refusing to do this right?'

And in the heat of the argument, I stepped forward and grabbed his face with both my hands. I pulled his face towards mine, pausing just before my lips touched his.

I looked up straight into his eyes.

He didn't hesitate for any longer.

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2 months... oh God.

To the Fam: DON'T STOP AND THE CAPES AND THE UNDERWEAR AND THE PADDED FAKE MUSCLES AND THE ALBUM AND THE BILLBOARDS AND THE EP AND THE ALBUM ASDFGHJKL ALL AT ONCE.

IF YOU HAVENT SEEN PENELOPE GO WATCH PENELOPE.

IF YOU HAVENT SEEN THE LEGO MOVIE GO WATCH THE LEGO MOVIE.

And I'm so sorryyyyy (Imagine I sang that like Blink then ill be easily forgiven XP)

And its a cliffhanger I guess.. but hey, I'm still loved right?

Its raining outside right now, and the street light outside my window is shining on it so the rain effect looks really awesome but no one is awake!!! Ughhh.

Love ya all!

Thanks for sticking round here :)

Naya :D