Playing Hard to Get: Chapter 39

I STARE AT HER, dumbfounded by her beauty, crushed by those tears on her face. I never want to make my girl cry. The meaning of her words, what she just said, slowly sinks in.

Fuck, she’s right. He may have had her first…

But I do love her best.

“Jo…”

“It’s okay if you don’t feel the same yet, really.” She smiles and it’s shaky, her tears falling freely now. I reach up and gently brush them away with my thumb, savoring her soft skin. The way she’s watching me, her body shivering, her eyes shining with love. “But I’m in love with you, Knox. We haven’t known each other for long, but I know without a doubt how I feel about you. And nothing will change that. Not Bryan showing up and trying to win me back. Not your old hookups popping into the bookstore and letting me know how lucky I am that I nabbed you.”

What? Is she serious? She never told me about that.

“Not the fact that you’re graduating this year and you’ll probably leave to go play in the NFL. As long as you’ll have me, I want to be yours.” She sniffs, closing her eyes for a moment as if to stop her tears and I can’t take it.

I yank her into my arms and kiss them away one by one, my heart aching at the sound of her sobs. “I love you too, Jo Jo.”

Her eyes crack open. “You do?” she practically wails.

I almost want to laugh. This woman…

“So fucking much. I think I’ve been in love with you for a long time, I just didn’t want to admit it, because I’ve never been in love before. I didn’t know what I was feeling.”

“We’ve only known each other a couple of months,” she points out with a little hiccup.

“My dad told me at dinner, when you know, you know.” I kiss the tip of her nose. “And with you, baby, I know. I’m in love with you, Joanna Sutton. And I’m so fucking glad you feel the same way because, if you didn’t, I would’ve done everything in my power to convince you that you should love me. I would’ve worn you down until you would’ve been like, fine. Jesus, I love you.”

She’s laughing. Crying. Shaking her head, looking at me as if I’ve lost my damn mind, which I have, thank you very much. All over her. “You would’ve done that for me?”

“And more. Because that’s how much I love you. You’re the first thing I think of when I wake up, and the last thing I remember before I fall asleep. Something will happen during my day and I’ll think, ‘I need to tell Jo Jo about this.’ Everything in my life begins and ends with you.” I cup her cheeks with both hands, tipping her face up, so I can kiss her. “I love you.”

She closes her eyes, nuzzling her cheek against my palm. “I love you, too.”

Will I ever get used to her saying that? Probably. Do I ever want her to stop?

Never.

“Thank God I don’t have to convince you.” She laughs, and the sound makes me feel as if my heart is going to float out of my chest. “Now let’s go inside before my balls freeze off.”

Thank God I left the dinner early and came over here when I did.

Cam and I went back to the hotel for dinner with my family and the energy was so off in the restaurant, it was…odd.

I felt like I was trapped in a bad dream.

Blair was hostile. Cam was quiet, and that guy is usually bouncing off the walls after a big win like the one we just had. He spent most of the meal talking to my dad while I tried to engage a sullen Blair in conversation. Mom had a weird look on her face as she observed us all and eventually…

I got sick of it. I tried to text Joanna, but she didn’t answer, which freaked me out. Mom saw it all over my face, and halfway through dinner, she stretched her hand across the table, settling it over mine.

“You can leave if you want. You should go to her,” she murmured.

“But you guys are leaving in the morning—”

“Go. Your heart isn’t in it.” Mom’s smile was understanding and that’s when I realized why my heart wasn’t in it.

It’s right here with this woman. She owns my heart, and I’m giving it to her freely.

Just like she gave me hers.

Still can’t believe that fucker Bryan was trying to work his weaselly ways on her, but my Jo is smarter than that chump. She was on to his bullshit. I only had to provide backup.

Guess I can’t blame him though. Joanna is pretty fucking special.

His loss is my gain.

The moment we’re in her apartment, I shiver at the blast of heat that hits us. Natalie is curled up on the couch, her gaze bouncing from Jo to me and back to Jo.

“Those are happy tears, right?” The hint of worry in Natalie’s voice is obvious.

I sling my arm around Joanna’s shoulders and pull her in close, kissing her forehead. “Definitely,” I answer for my girl.

“Aw.” Natalie rests her hand against her chest. “You two are adorable.”

“Thanks for watching out for Jo,” I tell Natalie.

Her smile is faint. “She’s my best friend. Of course I’m going to watch out for her.” A fierce gleam fills her gaze. “Tell me you chased after Bryan and beat his ass.”

I chuckle. “Nope. Joanna let him walk. I bet that hurt more than an ass beating from me.”

That fucker is lucky I didn’t beat his ass. He deserved it for what he’s done to her. Joanna needed to stand up for herself and tell that asshole to leave her alone, and I think—hope—he finally got the message.

If not and he comes back around, then I’ll give him the ass kicking he needs.

“You were so strong, saying what you said to Bryan,” Natalie tells Joanna. “I’m so proud of you.”

Joanna’s trembling, overcome with emotion, I’m sure. “Thank you.” Her voice is thick with tears.

My girl is brave. I’m so proud of her.

“You need to go to bed.” I kiss Joanna’s cheek, my lips lingering for a beat too long. “I know you’re tired.”

“Please.” Natalie rolls her eyes, reaching toward the side table by the couch and holding up her AirPods case. “Looks like I’ll need these tonight.”

I chuckle, Joanna leaning into me, and we wish Natalie good night before I lead my girlfriend—the woman I’m in love with—back to her bedroom.

It feels so good to think like this. To admit my feelings and just live in them. I love her. She loves me.

Life is fucking good.

Once we’re in her room, she sags against me, and I can feel her weariness. That argument with Bryan and our life-changing conversation took everything out of her. With gentle hands, I begin to remove her clothing, stripping her of her coat and hat. Smiling when I trace the eighty-eight on her right cheek. It’s faded, smeared from her tears, but it still feels good, knowing she wore my number today. Representing me.

I hope I made her proud. We almost lost that game.

“I’m going to take care of you,” I murmur, tugging at the hem of her jersey T-shirt. “Let’s get you undressed, baby.”

“Are you trying to get into my pants, Maguire?” She’s half-joking, her lips curved into a barely-there smile.

“Definitely.” I grin. “But only so we can climb into bed and fall asleep.”

Her disappointment is palpable. “Please tell me you’re going to strip too.”

“Hell yeah.”

Once she’s down to her panties and that’s it, I’m guiding her beneath the covers, pulling the comforter up to her chin. She watches me with wide eyes as I efficiently strip, until I’m wearing nothing but my boxers and climbing into bed with her. I grab hold of her by the waist and haul her in close, spooning her from behind, my face buried in her fragrant hair. She snuggles against me, resting her arms over mine, her ass nudging my cock.

It stirs to life, the horny fuck.

“I still can’t believe Bryan showed up.” Her voice is scratchy. “Why would he try to convince me we should get back together?”

“Because he realized he lost you and he regretted his every choice.” I squeeze her tight. “I understand where he’s coming from. Now that you’re mine, I never want to lose you.”

“I’m glad we broke up. If not, I would’ve never met you.”

I push her hair aside to rain tiny kisses along her nape. “The best thing that ever happened to me is Bryan ending it with you.”

She keeps her head bent, her breathing shallow. “You really mean that?”

“When it comes to you, I mean everything I say. You’re the best thing to happen to me. I’m on top of the fucking world this semester, and that’s all thanks to you.”

“You had something to do with it,” she says wryly, and I tickle her ribs, making her squeal. “What? It’s true.”

“Yeah, but only because of you. You inspire me.” I kiss her hair. “You believe in me when I don’t even believe in myself sometimes.”

She glances back at me, confusion in her gaze. “Knox. You are the most confident person I’ve ever met. What did I do to help you believe in yourself?”

“School. My reading. Writing those papers. You make me strong, Jo Jo.” It was so much easier to fake it when we were younger. Even in high school. My coaches always had my back, would somehow make it easier for me to pass classes, and now I realize it’s because they couldn’t afford to lose me on the field.

They’d do whatever it took to keep me there, even cheat for me.

College is where it got tough. Now I’m glad I didn’t take English my freshman year like I was supposed to. I would’ve never met Joanna.

Everything happened as if it was supposed to end up like this.

“Your mom shouldn’t feel guilty. I think what happened to you is pretty normal.” A sigh leaves her. “It’s not right though. From what I understand, schools are getting better at identifying reading disorders and offering help. I hope that’s the case.”

“You don’t want to be a teacher, huh? You’d be really good at it.” I love that she wants to help others. She’s such a natural.

“I realized I didn’t have the passion for teaching.” Her voice is soft. Even a little hesitant. “I’ve been writing lately. Little scenes here and there.”

“Really?” I know she said she wanted to be a writer, but I didn’t know she was actually doing it. “What are you working on?”

“Um…it’s a romance.” She laughs nervously. “About a hot football player who falls for the nerdy girl.”

“Nerdy girl? I don’t know if I’d describe you like that.” I give her a squeeze, my hands wandering.

She shoves my hand away from her breast, her laughter growing. “I didn’t say it was about us, Knox.”

“You gotta admit it sounds familiar.” I kiss her shoulder. “Is the story hot?”

“It will be.”

“Like that book of yours I listened to?”

Jo goes quiet. “Hopefully.”

“Guess I’ll have to read it then.”

“That’s what it takes to get you to read, some sexy stuff?” She glances over her shoulder at me, her smile soft and sweet.

I kiss her, murmuring against her lips, “I’ll read anything you write, Jo Jo. That’s how much I love you.”

“I love you too.” She faces forward once more, snuggling up close, and we remain quiet for a few minutes, both of us lost in thought.

Until finally I slide my hand over her stomach, then lower, my fingertips teasing the waistband of her panties. “Are you tired?”

She nods. “You can keep doing what you’re doing though.”

“I’m tired too.” I slip my hand into her panties, encountering nothing but wet heat. “But never too tired for you.”

Within seconds, her panties are gone, and I’m stroking her pussy, my mouth on her neck, my dick lodged between her ass cheeks. She’s rubbing against me, soft moans falling from her lips, the sound of my fingers sliding in and out of her filling the room.

Filled with impatience, I get rid of my boxers before I roll her onto her back and kiss her fiercely at the exact moment I fill her to the absolute hilt with my cock. She moves with me, her head thrown back, her tits bouncing with my every thrust, and I increase my speed. Pounding inside of her, desperate to come.

Desperate to make her come.

“You’re mine, Jo Jo,” I remind her. Remind myself. “This pussy belongs to me.”

She clenches around me, her inner walls beginning to milk my cock, strangling my orgasm right out of me. I come with a shout of her name, spilling inside her as I shudder and shake. She runs her hands up and down my back, her nails lightly scratching, making me shiver.

“I love you,” I whisper into her ear once the orgasm has subsided for both of us. I’m sweaty, my skin clinging to hers, and I try to lift myself off of her, but she presses her hands against my lower back, keeping me there.

“I love you too.” She kisses along my jaw. “Don’t leave me. Not yet.”

“Baby, don’t you know?” I touch her face and she cracks open her eyes. “I’m never leaving you.”

“Promise?” Her eyes are filled with so much love for me, my chest aches.

“Yeah.” I chuckle, dipping my head to kiss her. “You’re stuck with me.”

“There’s no one else I’d rather be stuck with.”

“Same, Jo Jo.”

Same.