Forbidden: Part One – Chapter 52

“That’s right, baby girl. Take all of me.”

Cam pushed his cock into me in a single thrust, the sting of pain taking my breath away. I wriggled, trying to create some space between us. It was too much. I was stretched tight around him, each thrust causing a burning friction in my channel. I tried to breathe in his scent, but there was… nothing.

“Ah ah, no getting away from us,” Theo whispered in my ear, his hand coming up and gripping my throat. “We’re going to do whatever we want. This is our body.”

A gush of slick rushed out of me as Ben pinned my hands above my head, but it felt wrong. Nausea swirled in my stomach. I didn’t like this. Darkness surrounded me, and I realized someone had slipped a blindfold over my eyes. I tried to relax into Cam’s thrusts, tried to tell myself it felt good, but the panic in my chest grew and grew.

“Look at that little whore, taking cock like the omega slut she is,” Cam growled. Theo’s hand squeezed tighter and tighter. I tried to tell them to stop, scream, whine, anything, but no sound came out. A hint of a scent tickled my nose, but I couldn’t place it.

“Omega sluts, all the same.” I heard Ben’s words, but they didn’t make sense. My alphas wouldn’t talk to me like this.

Cam came with a grunt before ripping his cock out of me and grabbing my ankles, holding them to the bed.

No, not the bed. A metal table.

It had all been a lie. Everything they had said and done leading up to this moment. Betrayal turned my skin hot and cold at the same time.

Steel bands wrapped around my waist, tightening until I knew they would leave deep bruises. Shackles clicked around my hands and legs, keeping me spread-eagled on the examination table. Theo’s hand lifted from my neck, and I took a ragged breath before a cold, metal collar wrapped tightly around my neck, holding it in place.

“Why are you doing this?” I croaked out. “I thought you loved me.”

Tears leaked from behind the blindfold, wetting my face and hair.

“Who could ever love a fat, ugly, defective slut of an omega like you?”

It was him.

I choked and gagged on Glen Jacoby’s rotten fruit scent—initially sweet and then stomach curdling.

“Activate the device,” he commanded with a laugh.

“No!” My scream echoed in my ears, my throat feeling like it was bleeding from the force of it.

“Josie, baby girl, wake up now.” The voice hovered on the edge of the fog surrounding me, but I couldn’t bring the words into focus.

My alphas. They hurt me. Betrayed me.

“Why won’t she wake up? Precious, please come back to us.”

“Fuck, she’s going to hurt herself. Sweetheart, open your eyes now.”

“Josie, wake up!” Theo’s bark ripped me out of the nightmare.

My eyes flew open at the command. I was on my back on the bedroom floor. Cam, Ben, and Theo were around me. Looming over me. Trapping me.

“No!” I shrieked. “Stay away!”

I curled into a ball and then remembered the device. They would use it against me. My hand flew up to where I knew it was implanted and I dug my nails in, trying to dig it out.

“Angel, please stop. You’re bleeding.” Theo pleaded, his coffee scent acidic.

His scent.

Every muscle in my body froze. I took a deep, shaky breath. Bursts of coffee, cinnamon roll, and spiced apple hit me.

My mates.

I whimpered, relief coursing through me like a deluge before a sob tore out of my chest. It had been a dream. My mates were here.

I breathed in again, needing to convince myself this was real. Each inhale convinced me a little bit more.

“I’m going to turn a light on,” Theo murmured.

The glow of the table lamp illuminated the mess around me. The bedding was in a twisted pile on the floor. I realized I was naked, something that had felt fine when I went to bed but now made me want to vomit. I whimpered as I tried to cover myself, curling into a tight ball.

Ben dug through the bedding pile until he found my favorite soft blanket. He slowly moved towards me and laid it over me. I realized he was crying. They all were. I had made my alphas cry. Another sob burst from my chest.

“Can I touch you, baby girl?” Cam asked, his voice hoarse.

I shook my head. I couldn’t handle any hands on me, my skin still crawling from the nightmare.

Theo got up and I whined. “Don’t leave me.”

I knew it was irrational to want them to be near me but not touching me, but the thought of him going anywhere constricted my chest. He crouched down in front of me.

“I’m just going to get the first aid kit from the bathroom,” he said carefully. “I promise I’ll be right back. Is that alright, angel?”

I nodded, tightening the blanket around me. My upper arm felt like it was on fire, and wet drops of blood dripped down my skin. Shakily, I pushed myself into a seated position, using the wall at my back for support. Ben and Cam sat close in front of me. Not touching, not saying anything, just lending me whatever support they could with their presence. There was such sadness in their eyes and their scents were sharp with distress. I wanted to reach out and comfort them, erase the devastation from their faces, but fear kept me frozen.

Theo returned with the first aid box.

“Can I look at your arm, love?” he asked, sitting down at my side. He moved hesitantly as if I was a wounded animal about to bolt. Which, I guess I was. My face heated. God, I was such an inconvenience. Other alphas got fun, perky omegas who slept without waking up screaming and were… normal. My mates were stuck with me.

Defective. Glen’s voice snarled through my mind, making me whimper.

“Baby girl, we’re right here. Nothing’s going to happen to you.” Cam’s voice grounded me enough to peek out from where I’d pressed my face to the blanket.

I took a deep breath, trying to focus on Cam’s words. I realized Theo was waiting for me to give him an answer. “Okay,” I whispered, untangling my wounded arm from the blanket.

I kept my eyes on his face, not wanting to see what I’d done to my arm. Tension filled his gaze as he frowned at the cuts. He caught me looking at him and threw me an apologetic smile.

“Sorry, love. It doesn’t look like it needs stitches. I’d like to clean it up and bandage it if that’s okay with you. I won’t touch you more than I have to.”

Part of me wanted to throw myself at my alphas and demand that they wrap themselves around me. But I wasn’t quite ready yet. I gave Theo a non-verbal assent and continued taking deep breaths, allowing the scents of my mates to pull me further and further away from the dream.

Ben sat close to my other side, his shoulders shaking with silent tears. I wanted to ease his pain, but I didn’t know how. I pushed my left hand out of the blanket and threaded my pinky with his. His teary gaze met mine as he squeezed my little finger.

“I love you,” he mouthed at me.

“Love you,” I mouthed back.

Theo’s hands were achingly gentle as he cleaned my arm—the place where the scar was, not the device. I took a shuddering breath. It wasn’t in me anymore. The adrenaline of the dream drained from me, leaving me boneless. I rested my head on Ben’s shoulder, unable to remain upright. He shifted slightly so my face rested close to his neck, as if he knew I needed his scent right now.

“All set,” Theo said, causing me to jump a little. I still wasn’t ready to look at my arm, the evidence of what I had done to myself.

“Do you want to go back to bed, sweetheart?” Cam asked, his voice hesitant.

I lifted my head, meeting his devastated gaze. Last night he looked at me with heat in his eyes as he made love to me repeatedly. That seemed like a distant memory.

“I… I don’t think I’m ready to go back to bed,” I whispered. “Can I sit in the den for a bit?”

“Of course, precious,” Ben said, giving my pinky a little squeeze.

“I don’t want to keep you up,” I said, shame curling in my stomach.

“We want to be with you,” Theo said firmly. “Unless… unless you want to be alone?” His voice sounded strained.

“No!” I said, panic filling me at the thought.

“Not leaving you,” Cam said with an air of possession.

Memories of nightmare-Cam tried to encroach. I needed to replace them with something good. I released Ben’s finger and shakily held out my arms to Cam.

“Will you carry me?” My heart was pounding, and my scent was bitter with stress.

“Always,” Cam grunted out.

With tremendous tenderness, he scooped me up. I wrapped my arms and legs around him and breathed in big gulps of his scent. This was Cam, my Cam, who was so worried about hurting me I had to goad him into having sex. My Cam, who had been so tender while he dominated me. I rubbed my face against his neck, scent-marking him. I needed their scents covering me, grounding me. I tightened my hold and he responded in kind, exhaling a deep breath.

“I love you, baby girl.”

“Love you so much.”

I wanted to apologize to all of them for my reaction, for waking them, and upsetting them, but I knew they would just growl at me and tell me I had nothing to be sorry about. The ghost of a smile tugged at the corner of my mouth.

Cam settled down on the sectional with me still wrapped around him. I reached my arms out on either side of me, needing to feel Ben and Theo. They were there immediately, pressing their bodies against mine. Theo’s hand threaded in my hair, and Ben held me around my waist. For a moment, it was too much. Reminders of being held down in the nightmare flooded me. The guys stiffened, noting my distress. I forced myself to take a deep breath, inhaling their scents. You’re safe, you’re safe.

“It’s okay,” I said, my muscles unclenching.

I knew the guys were dying to ask me what had happened, but they refrained, simply caressing me and planting tender kisses on my skin. I needed to tell them everything. If I didn’t do it now, I would chicken out.

“Glen Jacoby has been a friend of my parents for a long time.” I kept my face pressed into Cam’s neck, eyes closed, focusing on their scents to keep me grounded. I felt Cam’s breathing hitch before he relaxed again.

“When I was younger, he was at the house a lot. I realize now he was working with my parents to plan the Designation Government takeover. I hated being at home anyway, so I tried to stay out of the house or in my room. But sometimes, my parents would force me to come down and sit through these long, formal dinners. Glen would almost always be there, along with a group of their friends. Director Whiteburn was there once, and several other people who now have government positions. But I remember Glen the most. He was the loudest, always saying anti-omega things.

“After I revealed, the insults became more pointed. He mocked my body, talked about how much I was eating, and gave my parents suggestions on how to control me better. He acted like he hated me. But sometimes, I would catch him staring and it felt… I don’t know. It felt like he was a predator and I was his prey. His eyes tracked me all the time.”

Cam vibrated underneath me, and I heard Ben’s sharp intake of breath. I glanced over at Theo, who was sitting stiffly, a blank mask on his face.

“When the Designation Government came into power and founded the Academy, I was in the first class mandated to attend. At first, it was like a strict boarding school. But then things got worse.”

My throat felt like it was closing up. I’d never shared the full story of what happened to anyone besides Sam, and I had been drunk when I had told him. Cam pressed a gentle kiss to my temple.

“They implemented a whole system of punishments. If you didn’t follow their rules, they would take away your weekend privileges, meaning you could never leave campus. They would also strip your room of anything comfortable, like blankets and pillows. You already know about the meal plan they put me on.”

My three alphas growled.

“We got word that they were going to start doing… medical exams on us. Specifically, pelvic exams to make sure we were virgins.”

“Fuckers,” Cam snarled.

I squeezed my eyes shut and clenched my hands tightly, pushing ahead.

“I made a few friends while there—Poppy and… Genevieve.” God, even saying her name was painful.

“Our rooms were next to each other, and we had classes together. Poppy was only there for two months before she bonded with her alphas. She left before things got bad. When Genevieve and I found out the medical exams were scheduled to start, we decided to escape. We couldn’t make it another year and a half, and we’d been punished so much that we hadn’t been allowed to do any pack interviews. We were trapped. So we planned out the whole thing, but the night before we planned to go, the guards came to my room. They said Genevieve told them about our plans to escape. She betrayed me.” I choked on those last words, the pain as fresh as it had been years ago. Cam’s chest vibrated with a steady growl, and I wasn’t sure any of them were breathing.

“So they took me to this room. Glen was there with Dr. Bishop, my fathers, and other DA board members. Glen announced to all of them I was a defective omega and could never bond with a pack the way I was. But they had just created a new training program to transform omegas like me to fit the expected designation standards.”

My tears fell heavily. Cam wrapped the blanket around me tighter.

“Take a breath, baby girl.”

I forced the air into my lungs and then continued, trying to get the words out as fast as possible.

“They forced me onto a metal table and strapped me down. Everyone stood around me, watching me as I screamed. Glen said they had a new device they could implant into an omega’s arm that would force compliance and deliver punishment, all to train the omega to obey alphas at all times. So, then they cut open my arm and put the device in.”

“Shit,” Ben said, looking wide-eyed at Cam, whose jaw clenched. Cam shook his head almost imperceptibly, and I wanted to ask about their reactions, but I was shaking too hard to get words out.

“Shh, you’re going to make yourself sick,” Theo said, running his hand up and down my back, his pace too rapid to be soothing. “I’m going to get you some water.” He kissed me on the cheek before getting up. The silence in the room was stifling, broken only by my sobs and Cam’s growl. I reached out blindly for Ben’s hand, unable to stomach looking any of them in the eye. He immediately captured my hand, squeezing it tightly and kissing my wrist.

I heard shattering glass from the kitchen and flinched.

“Theo?” I asked.

“Don’t worry,” Cam said. “He’s just trying to process it all.”

I curled into myself. “I’m making you upset.”

“We’re upset because we love you more than anything. You’re being so brave, so strong to tell us.”

Theo returned with a glass and tissues. I met his gaze for a split second, and the rage and love I found there took my breath away. I managed a few sips of water before exchanging the glass for tissues, cleaning up my face and blowing my nose. I could feel my mates’ eyes on me intently as I grabbed more tissues to blow my nose again. For some reason, the idea of them staring so seriously at my snot caused a hysterical giggle to burst out of me.

“Never thought I’d have an audience for blowing my nose,” I quipped. None of them said anything, the tension still crackling in the room.

“Okay, Josie, not the time for joking,” I muttered.

“I think you’re very funny,” Ben said gravely.

I snorted, casting him a grateful smile. He winked and that gesture, more than anything, helped me continue.

“After they put the device in me and sewed up the cut, Glen activated it. I lost consciousness. When I came to, all I knew was some amount of time had passed. Everyone in the room, my fathers included, were clapping and congratulating Glen for his work. I realized I was naked.” I dug my fingernails into my palms more deeply, trying to keep myself from returning to that room. Theo’s hands captured mine, soothing the marks on my skin.

“Squeeze my hand as hard as you want to,” he said. “Use your fingernails on me.”

I whimpered. I could never cause him pain. But I gave his hand a squeeze in gratitude.

“I was terrified of what had happened and lashed out at the doctor and assistant. Then Glen activated the device again, but this time it gave me an electric shock. I didn’t know if the pain would ever end. After that, I didn’t fight them.”

“During the rest of my time at the DA, Glen visited frequently. We had monthly medical exams, and he would be there for them. He would activate the device so I would be unconscious for the exam. It feels almost worst that I wasn’t awake for it. I don’t know what they did to me,” I sobbed. “I’m dirty.”

“No,” the three of them growled at the same time.

“You are so strong, precious. Such a survivor,” Ben said, kissing away my tears. “I’m so in awe of you and how you’ve kept going, kept resisting, kept living.”

“But I stopped fighting,” I confessed. “Anytime I did anything they didn’t like, they would take more things away. I lost track of time. I think I spent more time in solitary than out of it. And Glen would visit and use the device—shocking me if I didn’t obey him and then putting me unconscious whenever he wanted. When it was finally time to leave the DA, my parents came to collect me and bring me back to their house. I hadn’t been outside for almost two years. Those first few weeks, I stayed in my room. I wanted to die,” I whispered.

“That’s how Sam found me. I hadn’t gotten to speak to him for two years. He was about to move to Sol. He told me he wrote to me the whole time I was at the DA but had been told that I didn’t want to talk to him—I was too busy having fun at boarding school. He panicked when he saw me. He was going to give up moving to be with Ger…” I stopped, aware that I was about to betray his secret.

“We are forever in debt to Sam,” Cam said, sensing my hesitation. “He’s part of your family, which makes him a part of ours. We would never do anything to hurt him.”

I nuzzled my face into Cam’s neck. “He was going to give up moving to be with his boyfriend just to make sure I was okay. But I told him… I told him I would kill myself if he gave up his happiness for me.”

Ben made a distressed noise.

“Our compromise was that he would keep paying for his apartment so I could move in. At that point, political opposition to the Designation Government was ramping up, and they weren’t paying me a lot of attention. Sam moved me out without telling my parents. Once they found out, they tried to threaten me to get me to return. I told them I would make everything that happened to me at the DA public if they tried to force me back home. That scared them enough to back off.”

“Did the DA remove the device before they sent you home?” Theo asked, running a gentle finger over my bandages.

“No. I got really drunk with Sam before he left and told him everything. I forced him to cut it out.”

“Fuck!” Cam shouted. A snarling growl tore through his chest, and I could tell he was torn between punching something and keeping me on his lap. In the end, he tightened his grip on me.

“What was the nightmare about, precious?” Ben asked, cupping my face with his hand.

“I think seeing Glen on the news last night triggered it.” I paused, unsure how much to tell them. In the end, I decided they didn’t need to know the details. It would only make them hesitant to touch me or have sex with me, and I didn’t want that.

“I dreamed of being on that table with Glen. I was scared the device was still in me.”

We lapsed into silence. I felt drained, but not in a bad way… I felt lighter, grateful we didn’t have this secret between us. I rested my head on Cam’s chest, holding Ben’s hand tightly. After a while, I realized Theo wasn’t touching me. I cracked my eyes open and saw him staring off into the distance.

“Theo?” I asked hesitantly. “Are you okay?”

His eyes snapped to mine, and he forced a smile that didn’t reach his eyes.

“No, angel, I’m not okay. I just heard that my mate, the most important person to me in the world, was tortured for years. And we didn’t do anything about it.”

I scrunched my nose in confusion. “What would you have done? You didn’t know I existed.”

Theo ran his hand through his hair in agitation. The usually styled strands were sticking up erratically. I reached out and fixed a few pieces, and he leaned his face into my hand. I nudged Cam’s arms, and he released me with a reluctant sigh. I crawled over to Theo’s lap, snuggling up to him.

“It’s not your fault,” I whispered, running my fingers down his face.

He took a slow, shuddering breath before wrapping his arms around me and burying his face in my hair.

“We’re going to take those fuckers down,” he said.

A thrill of fear and excitement ran through me. I’d spent the past few years just trying to survive, not thinking about the future, unsure if I would have one. But the thought of taking Glen down, the DA, the entire Designation Government…

“You think we can?” I asked, sitting up.

“Fuck yes,” Cam growled.

Ben smiled. “You haven’t seen these two in action, precious. They’re fierce when someone hurts someone they love.”

A little warm glow settled in my chest. It felt like hope.

“It’s going to take me a while to come to terms with this,” Theo said. “But I’m so grateful you told us. That you trust us.”

“Thanks for being safe,” I said, my voice hitching.

“Sweetheart, what do you need from us? I don’t want to trigger you,” Cam asked, concern etched onto his face. Now that my panic had settled, I realized my mates were all naked. I just had my blanket wrapped around me.

“Umm, maybe just no bondage with metal. And no blindfolds.” Cam nodded seriously. “But, please don’t… don’t be all careful around me. I still want you to see me as desirable. Not like a victim.” I looked them each in the face.

Finally, the tiniest hint of a smile touched Cam’s lips.

“You have nothing to be concerned about there, sweetheart. You are the sexiest,” he gave me a kiss on the forehead, “hottest,” a kiss on my nose, “most desirable woman in the universe.” A kiss on the lips. I exhaled, my shoulders relaxing. I had been worried sharing my past would ruin everything between us.

Theo’s arms tightened around me.

“Why don’t we go back to bed?” he suggested. “We can sleep in my room.”

I sighed in relief. I loved my room but didn’t want to return to my bed tonight. I kissed Theo on the cheek as he stood and carried me to bed.