070

I woke up earlier than everyone, so I figured preparing food for New and his mom to make up for my sudden absence. I planted a kiss on New's cheek, to which he flinched, but still remained asleep. The clock flashed the time, and it said 6:45 in the morning.

Waking up that early on a Saturday was very unlikely of me, but I guessed I was thinking of a lot of things that my mind didn't sleep at all. I put on my shoes, headed out of the room, and made my way to a nearby cafe to buy some food.

By the time I got back, New's mom was already awake and she was stretching her back as she looked at the window. When she turned to my direction, her eyes grew wide in surprise.

"Tawan!!!"

New must have slept like a log, because his mom screamed so loud that I felt my ears ring. She must have been so surprised seeing me by the door, because she ran excitedly towards me and pulled me into a tight embrace.

"How are you? Why did you leave suddenly? I missed you a lot!", She said as she continued hugging me tightly.

Contrary to his son's calm approach last night, she was rather ecstatic that I was once again back with them.

"I had to take care of things, Ma. I'm sorry I couldn't tell you, my phone got trashed and I lost contact of you and New.", I said.

"You brat, you made me worry a lot! I thought you were gone for good.", Finally, she let go of me and held me by the cheek instead.

"Hahaha, I'm sorry Ma, I won't do it again. Here, I bought muffins for us to eat. Think of it as my peace offering for leaving without notice."

"You believe in the saying 'the way to a man's heart is through his stomach' huh?", She said teasingly.

"I guess I do."

I put the bags of food on the table and checked on New, who was still sleeping soundly. He must have been too tired with the treatment that he slept peacefully so I didn't wake him up to eat with us.

"Really, son. Why did you suddenly leave? I really didn't want to be nosy if it's anything personal, but I want you to know you can talk to me, alright?", New's mom as she held my hand. It was just the two of us eating, and it seemed like New won't wake up any sooner.

I took a deep breath before telling the truth to his mom. With all of the things the three of us had gone through, New's mom made me feel like I could trust her, so I was only a bit hesitant to tell her the truth.

"Well, my dad found out about us."

New's mom wore a worried look on her face, but didn't say anything.

"He destroyed my phone, which explains why I didn't get to contact you, and kept me locked in my room for days."

"Oh honey, it must have been a suffering for you.", She said as she hugged me. This time, it was a relieving hug that felt like a mother's. It felt good receiving it again from her, and even if it was not the same as my mom's, it still felt genuine.

I told her the rest of my story, including my application to the university's photography competition. Although it was a bitter story to tell, I felt like a big chunk of heaviness was lifted in my heart when New's mom offered her ears to hear me out.

Ever since my mom's passing, I pretty much had to bear my worries all by myself. Of course, meeting New made the weight bearable, and I was able to find a reason to keep on existing, but in a time where both of us were in situations that needed someone to rely on, I couldn't keep on venting my issues on New.

"So what do you plan on doing now?"

"For now, I'll do my best at school and try to make my grades a little better. The contest can't guarantee my admission, especially when it's only my first time going."

"Right, do whatever you can in your power to augment your grades, don't worry about New's therapy."

"Can I stay with you for the time being? I ran away from home, and I don't really want to go home just yet. I'm not ready to face my dad."

"Of course honey, we'd love to have you around. New never told it to me, but I'm sure he's bored seeing only my face all day.", She jokingly said.

New's mom took a sip from her cup and continued eating her blueberry muffin when I suddenly remembered another thing that I wanted to discuss her with.

"Ma?"

"Yes?"

"Can...can I take New out next week?"

The smile from New's mom faded when she heard my request. I already expected her to say no, but I still tried my luck in getting her approval.

"When he was still not admitted to the hospital, he told me he wanted to chase the sun. As metaphorical as it may sound, but it's the only thing he wants to do before he....before he passes.", I said, my heart breaking as I said each word. It hurt me discussing that matter with his mom, as if I had already accepted the fact that the time left for New and us to spend together was close to ending.

"I didn't want to do it, but I thought that if he were to leave this world, I want him to leave with nothing but good memories to cherish."

His mom didn't say anything and was far from her usual active nature, and only looked at the window deep in her thoughts.

"I won't do it if you say no, Ma."

Just then, she turned to my direction and looked at me worriedly.

"If you don't know yet, the treatment has been failing to eradicate the cancer cells in New's body.", She said. My blood ran cold when I heard the words come out of New's mom's mouth.

How long was I gone that things turned out this way?

"His skin has gone sensitive and peels off due to the radiation, and the cancer cells have started dividing rapidly that the treatment hardly makes progress. On the day that you didn't show up, the treatment worked just fine and he was getting used to the side effects brought about by the radiation. Now, even intensifying the radiation wouldn't make a change. If anything, it would only cause his body to collapse.", New's mom continued, her voice faint and cracking from frustration. It wasn't noticeable awhile ago, but being close to her now, I noticed how bloated her face was and her eyes swollen from crying.

I looked at New, who was still sleeping soundly like a kid, and then at the wheelchair that was on the side of the couch. It made sense, how his voice was rather weak and raspy as he talked, and why there was a wheelchair on the room. New's body was deteriorating even with the treatment, and there's nothing else we could do.

"It pains me greatly, seeing him suffer at an early age. Why him, of all the people in this world? There's countless of people who commit grave sins each day, and they get to see the light of day in good health, so why my kid?", This time, New's mom was already sobbing uncontrollably. I couldn't even fathom the pain she was going through as a mom, seeing her child dying slowly before her eyes.

"Today's the last day of New's treatment. The oncologist told us there's nothing left they could do, and the only thing we could do is send him home and....wait."

Wait.

That moment, I didn't even remember breathing. My heart was shattered into a million pieces, hearing about the news about my boyfriend. I knew I had it coming, but it still felt like a knife had pierced through my heart. It was getting hard to breathe, and I couldn't look at New for a long time because I kept imagining things that I didn't want to see.

Our drinks had gone cold and the muffins remained untouched as we cried quietly in the room. It was a miserable Saturday morning that started off happy, only to descend into a horrible feeling of melancholy.

After a few minutes of silence, New's mom called my name and wore a smile.

"If that's what will make him happy in his last moments, do it."

I felt a gush of joy fill my heart when I heard his mom agree to my request. I was ready for her to turn down the offer as New was really not in the state to go around and travel, but it made me happy that his mom still agreed.

Still, I couldn't help but feel like a hole was beginning to get carved out of my chest. Chasing the sun may mean like a promise fulfilled for New, but to me, it meant a moment that will forever be a beautiful goodbye.