15 | ℜ𝔢𝔞𝔩𝔦𝔱𝔶

Sophia's POV

I sat up, breathing heavily. My head was pounding, luckily not so much that I wanted to bang my head against a wall. I grumbled under my breath and rubbed my forehead. I had one big and crazy dream last night.

I recalled me and Grayson mocking each other and having conversations I never thought I'd have, especially not with him.

I recall the way I moved my body against his, as if we were together, as if we were one. The way my skin glided over his. The way his rough hands rested on my hips while I swayed them from side to side in a slow pace. He sometimes glanced at my lips, I'd have no idea how to react, so, as usual, I just blushed stupidly and looked away.

The song kept fading more and more into the background, he was my first and only priority that night. I didn't know, still don't, what I wanted to do or say to him, but I simply wanted to be with him. Right there and then.

But it was all a dream.

Some part of me wishes it wasn't. I mean, we almost kissed! We were so in the moment, our faces only inches apart, the only thing stopping us were...us. I guess we both weren't ready, maybe he just didn't want to, but I...I don't even know myself why I didn't go any further. Probably because he could have any girl, so why me? I was just going to be another fling of his.

Grayson's reputation for being a bad boy and player wasn't a secret in our school. I've heard plenty of rumors about him. "He's been in bed with the various amount of girls here." and "I heard he only slept with women, because they're more mature and know how to please a person." even "He gets you in bed at night and in the morning he won't even know your name." I've heard it all.

Although I didn't understand half of it, I did some bits and pieces, and I just couldn't believe that, could I?

We're talking about Grayson here, a part of me said.

Yeah, I know, I haven't even known him for more than five or six days, let alone talk to him more than a few sentences, but I just couldn't see it. He wouldn't do that, would he?

"You can be so oblivious sometimes, Sophia. You try to see the good in people, but in some there just isn't any left. Can't you see what they're doing?! They are making you feel bad about yourself, they make you feel small. It's ridiculous! Even if you get hurt, you still try to help the people who made you feel weak, who broke you..." One of my old friends' words replayed inside my head. Carrie's words.

I shook my head to clear it, shoving these thoughts to the back of my mind. Grayson is good. Everyone has good in them. With some you just have to be patient.

But, as I was saying before, the more sensible part of me did wish it all just was one, wild dream.

I told him I was in. I told him I wanted to play. What exactly I agreed to, I have no clue. But everyone has already told me to stay clear from Grayson, to not let him play his devilish games on me, but I think I just did the opposite.

I wanted to slip out of bed, but felt a body next to mine. I shot up straight and looked down at the person lying next to me.

When I saw who it was, I never felt so relieved. For a second I thought it was- no, that wouldn't be possible. It was all just a dream.

I poked Liv until she subconsciously rolled away from my touch and muttered some curse words in her sleep. I snickered and silently climbed out of bed, I didn't want to wake her.

As I walked over to the bathroom, I halted in my steps and turned around. If we didn't go to that party, what exactly did we do? I can't remember. How can I not remember?

"Hey, um, Liv?" I came over to her and asked softly. She hummed absentmindedly. I bent down to her level and stroked the hair out of her face so I could see her more clearly. Her eyes fluttered open and she groaned, probably also having a headache.

"Yeah? Wait, how late is it?" she said, looking around distorted. I didn't look at the time when I woke up, but did now.

"Around 12 o'clock," I answered, shifting my gaze back to her. Before I was going to start my interrogation, I had to make sure she was alright.

"How are you feeling?" I asked gently, not trying to startle her as she just woke up and visibly was tired.

"I definitely need a pill," she chuckled and then slapped her face, groaning loudly. She sat up and dangled her legs from out of the comforters. I went to the bathroom and took out some pills, I didn't know which ones, since I've never used them. She took the the middle one and swallowed two pills, thanking me as I gave her a glass of water.

"So...what did you think of yesterday? How was it?" she enquired me.

"Uh, well...what exactly did we do yesterday?" I replied back with. She raised both her brows at me, as if analyzing my face to see if I was serious.

"I didn't think you had that much to drink," she chuckled again. Drink? What did I drink?

She saw my lost expression and continued, "How many cups have you had at the party?" The party? No... No, no, no. This can't be real. It was a dream, right?

"The party...at the mansion?" She looked me over with concern. "I saw you dancing with a guy. Two, actually. But one of them fit the description you gave me of Grayson perfectly," she said, hoping to let my memories come flowing back. But she didn't need to, those flashbacks are running around freely through my mind.

"S-So, it wasn't a dream?" Liv seemed even more confused now, but shook her head slowly, nonetheless.

"Did you have another drink after the one I gave you?" she asked me. I thought about it for a second, then recalled me getting a second one of the same kind. Don't judge, okay? I was feeling it, and I loved it.

I nodded my head and stared at the ground. I actually did that with Grayson. I danced with him and almost kissed! Oh God, I need a shower. "I'm gonna go get ready now, it's already in the afternoon," I told her, and without waiting for a response, went straight to the bathroom and closed the door behind me.

I don't know what I'm going to do now. I think I may have ruined the...thing we had. We weren't even friends or anything, but still. Was it going to be awkward now? Is he going to ignore me like most other girls? Ugh! I sighed heavily and turned on the shower. I didn't wait for it to get warm as I directly went under. I simply need to clear my head and calm down.

He's probably not even going to remember that night. Yeah, maybe he didn't even know it was me at the moment. I tried to relax a bit more with these thoughts, and eventually succeeded.

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Grayson's POV

What the fuck did I do...

What is wrong with me? How could I do this?

I was drunk and didn't think straight. I know, being drunk isn't an excuse, but fuck, I messed up big time.

Yesterday was a mistake. It was all one, big mistake, and I just hoped for it to be a nightmare.

Wanna know what I did? Well, I almost fucking kissed her. Sophia Ross, I almost kissed her. We danced together, we were both pretty drunk and feeling each other. We had...a moment. I cringed at my own thoughts.

When I saw her in the kitchen, talking to a friend I haven't seen around around, that friend handed her a drink. I don't know what it was, but probably something with alcohol.

Her outfit, you wouldn't believe your eyes. I couldn't decide if her normal clothes - the ones she wore at school - were better or the ones she was wearing there. Her usual outfit was cute and fit her perfectly. Light pink skirts, white blouses, sweaters made out of wool. Basically the 'soft girl' style.

But that night... She looked like a whole different person. It wasn't a bad thing, not at all. She appeared more mature and experienced? Maybe mysterious and dark. I don't know, I can't find the right words for it. But she looked good. The only thing that bothered me was that, just like in school, at least fifty percent of the boys were gawking at her.

Her top was lace, and so you could see her smooth and soft-looking skin through it. I couldn't help it, my overprotective side slipped through the cracks a bit. She just reminded me so much of her, I don't want anything bad to happen. I glared at anyone who looked at her wrongly, even though I didn't do much better. I was just another lost puppy on the leash she held, and she didn't even notice.

When she wanted to take a sip, she finally saw me observing the whole scene. I know I couldn't tell her what to do, but I didn't want her to get hurt. Some of these guys would try things on her and it'll only be easier for them if she were drunk. Even if she were sober, any guy who dared to touch her without her permission was dead meat. Literally.

When she chugged down that entire drink, I was shocked, to say the least. Did she just... Yup, she did. Damn, has she even ever drank before? She seemed so innocent, but now... Those were the thoughts running through my mind at that point.

The way she looked at me, it was seductive and captivating. If she did it on purpose or not, I didn't know. But as hard as I tried to deny it, it was a turn-on. I ignored the sensation of a small friend of mine twitching downstairs and kept on staring at her.

My anger rose and my blood boiled when I saw her grabbing that boy's arm and tugging him behind her. The boy would have done so without her having to pull him, believe me, I recognised that look on his face all too well.

I had to hold myself in, and it wouldn't have worked if the girl that was hanging from my arm wasn't there. It was only then that I realised the girl has never left, I completely forgot about her when I spotted Sophia there. A look of pure jealousy was plastered onto the girl's face.

"What?" I asked her, maybe a bit too rudely. She scoffed at me.

"I saw that," she complained. I really wasn't in the mood for an argument with a stranger, but oh well.

"Saw what?" I asked again. She whined and pulled on my arm annoyingly.

"Just come upstairs with me already. I'll make you forget about her in a matter of seconds," she slurred. I rolled my eyes and took her by the shoulders, making her look me in the eyes.

"I already told you. You're drunk and I'm not going to have sex with you while you are under the influence of alcohol," I articulated every single word. She was way too drunk and wasn't really listening anyway. She was probably going to fall asleep while going up the stairs.

"I don't careee, I want to do this!" She stomped her foot childishly on the floor and crossed her arms, but I had to catch her before she'd fall.

"I'm not going to take advantage of you like this, okay? Look at you, you can barely stand up without falling. Let's just get you to a safe place," I told her calmly. I placed her one arm around me and carried most of her weight. I put her in one of the bedrooms upstairs. She had already fallen asleep and was snoring lightly. I had to kick a couple out the room first, they could fuck in their car if they wanted, but this was more important.

I locked the door behind her, but not before filling a glass of water and setting it down on the table next to the bed. I put the covers over her and went back downstairs. I gave the key to Anderson's girlfriend, she'd know what to do with the girl and maybe they knew each other. It was also an excuse so I could finally get to see Sophia again.

While I was searching the living room for her, I witnessed him trying to kiss her, but she pulled away. I shouldn't have smiled, but I did. I went over to her directly when I saw that she looked guilty. She shouldn't feel like this when she rejected a guy she didn't know, nobody should.

After a while, she started getting comfortable and moved her body to the rhythm. You can not believe how hard it was for me to hide the boner I was getting. I swear, I was so scared that she'd find out, but fortunately for me, she didn't.

The moment she pushed her butt against my crotch, I knew I was going to have to find a good fuck after this. I felt the bulge in my pants grow, I tensed up but swiftly changed her from position. She stopped for a second, as if wondering what to do, but then resumed her teasing, little dance.

It made me furious when she told me about her parents. She evidently loved dancing and was utterly good at it, no doubt there. But we went on to the next topic, and I instantly forgot about that as she faced me, our faces only inches apart.

I asked her a question.

I question I didn't know why I asked.

I regretted it.

The biggest part of me does, if I should be honest. But there's one side of my brain that wanted this. Wanted to play this dangerous game with her. And when the answer left her luscious lips that I have been staring at for so long...

"Yes."

I couldn't control myself anymore. The evil and dark side of me smirked, he was overly satisfied and hungry for her. Full of lust he looked at her, ready to show what a man can do.

But that other part of me, the softer one, was scared. I was scared.

How could I have dragged such a pure and innocent human being into this mess? This dark place that pleases my fantasies that I have tried to keep secret for so long.

I can hurt her, I can break her, without me even noticing or being able to stop.

I need to find a way to stay away from her, and quick. But the dark side of me disagrees. He wants to have some fun.

But never ever has that one side of me been completely full-filled with pleasure. And when i tried to, the other person only ever got hurt.

That's why I fucked up.

That's what's wrong with me.

I am a monster I can't control.

But this is reality, and I have to face it now.