Chapter 201
The Abandoned Empress
I felt heartbroken, but I said firmly, â⦠Throw it away, too. â
âBut my lady, this is the late emperorâs gift. If you abandoned it recklesslyâ¦â
I closed my eyes tightly. Though I wanted to throw them away, she had a point.
I replied with a deep sigh after pondering for a moment.
â⦠Keep it deep inside, so nobody can see it.â
âYes, my lady. Thatâs all for now. Are you really going to throw all of them away?â
âNo.â
âOh, thatâs what I guessed. They are too precious to throw away. Can I put them back?â
âBurn them all instead of throwing them away.â
âPardon? Burn them all?â
âYes, burn them all.â
Originally the clothes of someone who died should be burned. Iâm here as Aristia la Monique, the successor of the Monique family, not as the woman named Aristia who already died.
âOh, my lady⦠â
âDonât you hear me?â
âOh, okay, my lady.â
After Lina went out with a bunch of dresses after some hesitancy, I slowly rose from the sofa and looked around at the empty dressing room.
Dresses in black, gray, navy blue.
I giggled at the mix of dresses in dark color.
When I was about to walk away from the dressing room after tidying up the disordered dresses, Lina suddenly reappeared and said, âMy lady, Sir Carsein is here. What shall I do? â
ââ¦Tell him to go back. I canât meet anybody today because Iâm in bad shape. â
âButâ¦â
âLina, when did you start talking back to me?â
I knew at some point that she followed Carsein like her master, but I felt she went too far.
Staring at her who flinched, I said coldly, âBecause I regarded you as my friend, you seem to talk back to me too much. Your comment is okay, but if you meddle, I canât accept it.â
â⦠Yes, my lady. I will be careful. â
At that moment, the door was flung open. I stared at the young red-haired man who stepped in. How rude of him!
âWhat the heck are you doing? I didnât even allow you to come in.â
âI couldnât just go because you are out of sorts.â
âWhat are you talking about?â
âYou were crying. I see your red face, â said Carsein, approaching my desk and looking at me with a worried expression. As I was facing his blue eyes, I felt more and more jammed up on the inside.
He said, breathing roughly, âIâm sorry if I hurt your feelings. But I was really worried about you. â
â⦠â
I suddenly felt sorry for him. Given my first meeting with him or rumors about him in social circles, Carsein was not the type of man who was careful and considerate. He was far from it. He wasnât so meticulous. Rather than being attentive, he was indifferent. In other words, he only focused on what he was interested in.
While he was trying his best to do something good for me, I could do nothing for him. Rather I was taking out my anger on him without any reason.
âOh, Iâm sorry for being angry.â
While I was apologizing to him out of guilt, I saw Duke Lars overlapping him. Despite his strong bondge with my family, he dumped me after thorough political calculations.
âLook at me, Tia.â
â⦠â
âUgh? Please raise your head. â
I looked up at his low but appealing voice. I said with a sulken voice, â⦠What do you want to say to me?â
âI heard what happened at the Imperial Palace. Well⦠was my father also involved? â
â⦠â
âOh, he wasâ¦â Carsein sighed again, said in a calm voice, âLet me apologize on behalf of my father. So, please let off your steam.â
â⦠Itâs already late,â I said, turning away from his eyes.
I unwittingly spat out some barbed words at him, though I tried not to.
âYou said you heard what I told them at the palace. Donât you really know what that means?â
When I saw him stiffening, I chuckled.
Yes, you know it. You know what kind of decision Iâve made and what Iâm thinking now.
âI said I would no longer interfere with the matters of the pro-emperor faction. So, I told them they should not expect any cooperation from my family. Donât you know what this means? It means Iâm willing to turn my back against them, especially your family, the chief of the faction, in particular.â
âThatâs why you tried not to make eye contact with me? Youâre not going to see me because you have turned your back against our family?â
â⦠â
âWhewâ¦â He sighed long, looking at me as I remained silent.
âWhy are you always trying to think in extremes?â
âWhat?â
âPlease donât do that. Isnât it too hard if you live like that? Let me help you. So, I hope you wonât be too hard on yourself.â
I was silent. What can I do for Carsen, the second son of the Duke Lars family at the moment when I could pursue a different path from theirs? Even if this had not happened, how could he help me in a situation like this when he spent time only practicing fencing without any interest in politics?
As if he read my mind, he let out a deep sigh after looking at me blankly for some time.
âYou donât believe me at all?â
â⦠â
âWell, would you believe me if I say I would move out of my parentsâ house?â
ââ¦Moving out?â
I opened my eyes wide. Of course, as he wasnât the successor of his fatherâs title and as he came of age, he was supposed to move out someday. But he was too young to move out. Besides, given that it was customary for the rest of the brothers including him to move out when the eldest son inherited the title, his remarks were extremely unusual.
When I looked at him in surprise, he nodded, looking at me with serious eyes.
âYes, Iâm moving out.â
âWhy?ân/ô/vel/b//in dot c//om
âWell, Iâm supposed to move out anyway. If I move out, I donât have to follow the political line of my family.â
â⦠Well, donât do it. I donât want to get you involved in my matters.â
Basically, it was my own matter. I didnât want to get him involved in something that I didnât like. Although I was grateful for his efforts to help me even by moving out, I didnât feel he would be a great help to me because he was not politically trained at all. Of course, he would be helpful when it came to fencing.
When I shook my head with a determined expression, he remained silent for a long time, then said in a calm voice, âOkay. Letâs talk about it next time. â
ââ¦Sein.â
âYou look tired. Have some rest.â
Having said that, he turned. His red shadow flickered and disappeared out of the door.
Looking at him disappearing, I sighed deeply.
Somehow I felt frustrated and gloomy.
Three days later I received a letter with the results of the meeting. The luxurious white paper detailed the coronation schedule and procedures, but there was nothing about the emperorâs wedding that was the center of the controversy.
According to the long letter, the emperor agreed to break off his engagement with me, but refused to hold a wedding ceremony with someone immediately.
Was it because of that? Other letters enclosed in it included several precautions. For example, as he canât officially reveal his breakoff in the presence of foreign delegations, I have to continue to act as his fiancée until a few months later when it is officially recorded. And I should not make any mistake as he will announce to the outside world that he and I have agreed to hold a wedding ceremony after I come of age and fully recover from poisoning.
Touching the two letters to the candlelight, I tilted my head.
Why did they make this conclusion? This was not what the pro-emperor faction or the noble faction wanted.
When I saw the ashes of the letters, I suddenly remembered what happened three days ago.
The emperor came to see me urgently and asked me to think twice about my decision, but I refused his request coldly. I felt heartbroken when he turned, saying he would do as I wished.
When I was working with a heavy heart, the butler came in carefully and gave me good news. He said the delegation of the Lua kingdom just arrived in the capital, and that my father would return home by evening.
It was already in the evening after I gave house employees various instructions for my father who came all the way back from the Lua kingdom.