Nine Days: Chapter 34

“I fell for you all the way to rock bottom”—24 Hours by Alexander Stewart

“We’re going to be late for our classes.”

Today’s classes aren’t on my mind at all.

Lily is sitting on the kitchen counter right next to the stove, while I—for once—make breakfast. It’s not as fancy as Lily’s fruity pancakes, but I’d say it’s edible. Don’t think there’s much to mess up by pouring cereal into a bowl.

“Seriously, Colin. You know what happened the last time I was late. I refuse to have another panic attack.”

I sigh, setting the cereal box down onto the counter. I walk over to Lily, standing between her legs, laying my hands down onto her waist.

“We’re not attending today.” We’re truly not. I figured since it’s the last day I have with her, we’ll stay here—well, not here at home. I have plans. The plan being Build-A-Bear.

Besides, it’s not like Lily really needs those classes anymore. I truly doubt she will change her mind at this point, so it doesn’t matter whether or not she’s attending.

“I have to. What about my grades?”

I narrow my eyes at her, trying to make sense of her caring about her grades when they won’t really matter.

Lily places her hands onto my shoulders, one of them sliding down over my chest. “Maybe it’s good we’re staying home. We can do…other stuff.”

Smirking, I take her hand from my chest, kissing her knuckles before pressing her hand right against my crotch. “All in for ‘other stuff.’”

I’m expecting Lily to make fun of me because she’s definitely not good for a man’s ego, but she surprises me when instead she traces her fingers along the outlines of my cock, palming me through my boxers.

“Are you cold, Colin?” she asks, smirking. “You’re not wearing any pants, but you are wearing a shirt.”

“It’s fashion, look it up,” I repeat her own answer from yesterday to her.

“You’re hiding something, Carter.” Lily reaches for the hem of my shirt, lifting it up. I stop her the second she’s about to pass my abs. “So I’m right. What are you hiding?”

I choose to remain silent, but I should know better. Lily will find a way to get the truth out of me.

“I love your dress, where did you get it?” I ask, sliding my hands up her thighs, hooking my fingers into the elastic of her panties. With a bit of a strengthened pull, I manage to remove her panties, sliding them down her silky soft legs.

I keep her panties tugged in my fist, using my other hand to trace along the inside of her thigh.

She gasps softly, but she knows this is me trying to distract her. As an attempt to distract me just as much, her hand slips into my boxers, wrapping around the length of my dick. Her thumb glides over the tip of my cock, eliciting a groan out of my throat.

“Tell me, Carter, what are you hiding?” she says while her lips almost brush mine. “Or do you want me to suck an answer out of you.” Her mouth is so close to mine, if I moved even just the tiniest bit I would feel her soft lips, getting a taste of the fuel to my addiction.

She strokes me in my boxers, making it harder to breathe. “What’s wrong, baby? Not so mouthy anymore, are we?”

I want her mouth on mine, shut her up and fuck her until she forgets her own name. Right. Fucking. Now.

But I won’t be the first one to cave.

“You want to kiss me, don’t you?” A tease, that’s what she is. She moves in closer, but her lips never touch mine. Lily kisses the corner of my mouth, then plants a couple more kisses along my jawline and down my neck.

Her hand pulls away from my cock. With a soft thud on the floor, Lily slides off the counter, kneeling down in front of me. She looks up at me, her gaze filled with lust and something dangerous for me—mischief.

“Where’s Aaron?” she asks, hooking her fingers into the elastic of my underwear.

“Early practice,” I breathe out.

Grinning, she pulls down my boxers until my erection springs free, her soft hand instantly wrapping itself back around my cock.

I inhale sharply when her tongue darts and crosses her lips, licking along my dick.

Hissing, my free hand finds into her soft blonde hair, gripping it firmly, yet not to the point where it would hurt her.

Lily’s still looking up at me, and if I didn’t know any better, I’d say she’s asking me what to do next.

Then she plants a kiss to my tip before opening her mouth and wrapping her lips around the tip of my cock, sucking.

My head tilts back into my neck, breathing growing heavier the deeper Lily takes me.

“Fuck, Lily,” I rasp, savoring the warmth of her mouth wrapped around my dick.

She moves so teasingly slow, it’s torture. The part of my cock that doesn’t fit into her mouth, Lily pumps with her hand, using slow and gentle strokes.

After a couple of torturously slow strokes, Lily moves quicker, her grip around my cock tightening just enough for her touch alone to send me off to see stars.

Pretty sure my groans and grunts grow a bit louder when Lily forces as much of my dick into her mouth as only possible, to the point where she would almost gag.

When I think she couldn’t surprise me anymore, she does.

Knowing that she’s not even wearing panties at the moment doesn’t exactly help against my urge to come.

The last time I felt like coming after a couple of moments when receiving a blowjob, was back in high school. Lily has managed to have me completely lose my mind. For her.

“Lily, you have to stop,” I grit out, pushing her away from my cock and pulling her up onto her feet.

My mouth immediately slams against hers, I’m no longer able to stay away from her lips. With no hesitation, I push my tongue into her mouth, waiting for that all too familiar tiny whispery moan to elicit from her.

And when it comes, that soft sound shoots right into my balls.

“I need you, Colin,” she speaks against my lips, her voice hoarse. “I need you inside of me, right now,” Lily corrects when I reach my hand down to her pussy, gliding a finger through her folds.

“So impatient, Lilybug.” Giving Lily as she wishes, I lift her up and carry her to the kitchen island, sitting her down. She spreads her legs, letting me stand in between.

I grab my erection, stroking the tip of my cock through her folds, spreading her wetness around, covering my tip with it.

With her lips on mine, my hands on her ass, I gently ease inside of her, pushing in piece by piece, watching her face for signs that it hurts. When they don’t come, I feel somewhat relived.

If there’s one thing I refuse to do, it would be hurting Lily. In any possible way.

Once I’m completely inside of her, Lily holds my shirt in her hands, lifting it up. And although that’s the last thing I want right now, I’m not fighting it. I help her take off my shirt, but to my luck, Lily doesn’t pay much attention to my body when I start to thrust in and out of her.

She moans my name, leaning back on the island, holding herself up by her arms. “More,” she demands, and so she gets what she wants.

Digging the tips of my fingers into the skin over her hips as I hold onto her tightly, I move faster, pushing into her deeper, rougher.

“Fuck, yeah,” she cries out, lying down on the counter, her arms no longer holding her up.

“You like that?”

She moans out loud in response, bringing a grin to my lips.

One of her hands traces down her body, her fingers finding her clit, rubbing it. Her other hand rests on her covered breast, giving it a squeeze. She’s doing all the things I want to do, to herself.

But God, it’s hot watching her. Watching as her fingers get covered in her own wetness when she circles her clit just the way it is the most pleasurable for her.

Yet as much as I enjoy watching her, I take over, using my thumb and rubbing the pad of it over the swollen nub.

I can feel her walls tighten, clenching around my dick. “Let go, sweetheart,” I order, looking into her eyes.

She’s staring back at me, her mouth forming the perfect “O” as more moans roll over her lips.

“I want you to come with me.”

She’s panting heavily, so am I. Drops of sweat rolling down our bodies, making it appear as if neither of us took a shower just an hour ago. But hell, I’d take a shower every hour if that meant Lily would blow my mind like this in between.

I only manage to nod, pushing into Lily just that tiny bit deeper. And when she comes with my name leaving her mouth, I come inside her, marking her even more as mine than she already is.

Lily takes a lot longer to shower than I did, so by the time she’s coming downstairs, freshly showered, I’ve already finished my breakfast.

After my shower I threw on some underwear and sweatpants, which means I’m still shirtless. But it’s not like Lily didn’t see my new tattoo before.

I know she has, just refused to ask me about it…until now.

“Why did you get a lily tattooed on your chest, right over your heart?” she asks, taking a seat on the barstool next to me.

“I like the meaning, Lilybug.”

She chuckles, yet raises her brows at me. “What meaning? Purity?”

“Not purity.”

Her arms cross in front of her chest. “What kind of other meaning is there?”

“Devotion.”

I can hear the sharp intake of breath from Lily, but instead of losing her shit like I’m expecting her to, she says, “It doesn’t even fit in with your other tattoos.”

I shrug. She’s right. All of my tattoos lack of color, simply because black ink seems to fit me better.

Except for my new one.

It has a couple of green strokes along the peddles. The same color of green that I see when I look into Lily’s eyes.

All of my tattoos have important meanings though. Important to me, at least. Lily’s isn’t too unique on that part. And yet somehow it’s still the one that means the most to me.

“It fits to the mark I have on my heart.”

A bit startled, Lily hops off the barstool and stands in front of me, tracing her index finger along the outlines of the lily on my chest.

“We both know that you got this tattoo because of me.”

“Not even trying to deny that.”

“Devotion, huh?” She pauses, inhaling deeply before she continues, “You’ll regret it, Colin. I mean, you’ve already committed to it, so there’s not much you can do about it anymore. But why did you get it in the first place?”

I blow out some air in a rough sigh.

“I want the truth.”

“Cause, mi sol, even if you’re going to die, I’ll always remember you. You’ll always be a part of my life, of my heart. Even if this ends in pieces of glass, shattered. You’ve made my life better in a couple of days. You’ve shone through the layers of fog that clouded me. You do have my ultimate loyalty, even after you’ve died. I couldn’t move on from you. I don’t even want to. You’re all that I am, Lily. I feel like I’m suffocating when you’re not around. And when I do breathe, you’re in every breath I take. You’re everywhere I look, everywhere I go. You’re everywhere. And that’s how I want it to be.”

I add, “I didn’t want to get this tattoo after you’ve already passed. I wanted—needed—you to know that you’ve got me. You’ll always have me.”

A tear rolls down her face, one I want to wipe away, but Lily isn’t letting me.

“This is crazy,” she says, crying. “You are crazy.”

“Perhaps it is. Perhaps I am. But that doesn’t mean you mean any less to me.”

“This wasn’t supposed to happen!” She takes a couple of steps back. “You weren’t supposed to…do this, feel this! You were supposed to show me beautiful places, get a couple of good, glowing memories into my head before it’s all black for all of eternity.”

“Life doesn’t always play out the way you want it to. Guess you should know that.”

Lily rolls her eyes at me, turning away. She starts to walk toward the stairs, probably to get her stuff and run away. Then she turns around again and starts to speak, “I can’t do this, Colin. I can’t do this—us anymore.” She takes a deep, shaky breath. “You’re hurting the both of us. Unnecessarily.”

“It wouldn’t hurt you if you didn’t feel the same way about me.”

My phone chimes just as Lily storms off, muttering something about life and the world being cruel.

I check my phone, just in case it’s about Eira before I go to run after Lily.

As I read the message on my screen, my whole world stops for an entire second. I push whatever I feel in my heart aside. Taking a deep breath, I shove my phone into my pocket and run after the woman that owns my heart.

She’s in my room, sitting on my bed as she holds her legs tightly to her chest.

“Lily,” I say calmly. My eyes wander to my window, watching for a moment as it’s pouring. My room is dark from the lack of sun, but it fits everything going on inside of me right now.

“Stop,” she cries. “I can’t deal with any more cruelty.”

I’m two seconds away from losing my shit. And when Lily mutters something under her breath, I can’t hold it back any longer.

“Yes, Lily, the world is fucking cruel. It’s breaking you down, taking away every good thing you have. It’s painful. It’s dark. It’s making you lose your goddamn mind.”

I shake my head and press my lips together. “But it’s also bright and filled with joy. It has good things to offer, if you fucking let them in.” I let out a disbelieving chuckle. “You’re living on a floating rock filled with water and you’re expecting life to make sense. Well, breaking news: It doesn’t make any kind of fucking sense to anyone. Your whole existence doesn’t make sense. For all we know, we could be a part of someone’s imagination and wouldn’t even know of it because this, our current life, is all we’re familiar with. Yet you’re here. You’re here for a reason, regardless of it maybe not making sense at all. Your reason to be here certainly isn’t to die earlier than you’re destined to. You have so much more to experience, so much more to see. And you’re wanting to throw it away.

“I showed you the world. I threw the fucking world to your feet and you’re still complaining about it not being a happy place. It’s not a fucking happy place, but you can get life to suck a little less if you’d only tried to.”

She’s crying more than before, and it breaks my heart. Perhaps all I’m saying is all the wrong things, but at this point, it’s all I have left to offer.

“I can’t get through life on my own, Colin. I can’t. I’m not that strong. I’m falling apart at every single tiny thing that fights back. I can’t keep living, feeling like a broken piece that’s never going to be whole again.”

“For fuck’s sake, Lily!” I say louder than intended, being seconds away from hitting something—not Lily—with my fists. “You are not alone!”

“I am.”

“Say that again, I dare you.”

“I am alo—”

“YOU HAVE ME!” I yell from the top of my lungs. “You have me. You’ll always have me, Liliana Heaven Reyes. You’ve had me since the day I found you crying in the arena. I’ve done nothing but to love you all these days. I took you on silly dates. The happiness you’ve experienced all this time, it wasn’t because the places were oh-so-magical. You felt alive. You felt loved.”

“So what? You just played with my heart?” Her eyes are red from crying, her nose too. She sniffles, wiping away tears that I swore I’d never be the reason for.

I run my fingers through my hair in frustration, inhaling a deep breath while looking at the ceiling. For someone who’s naturally smart, she comes off as pretty stupid right now. “To hell with that, Lily.” My eyes meet hers.

I hate that she’s crying. And I hate it even more that I will have to leave in a few seconds. My phone keeps vibrating in my pocket, so whoever tries to reach me…it won’t be good news.

“I fell in love with you, Lily. I spent eight, or seven, however many days I’ve actually had with you, trying to make you fall in love with me too.”

She opens her mouth to speak but I cut her off before she gets to do so.

“I know I’m fucking selfish. But yeah, there you have it. I love you. Now, go on, break my heart, Lily. I don’t care what you do with it, you have it all. Throw it on the streets and let a car run it over, step on it, I really don’t care, as long you’re the one breaking me.”

This time she’s not even trying to say something anymore, probably because she’s sobbing too much to do so—or because she just refuses to say anything.

“Look, I have a second car parked down the road. It’s a black BMW, you can use it to get away if you want to. The keys are downstairs. I have to cancel today, not sure if you’d even want to go out anymore anyway. This is going to be so shitty of me, but I have to go.”