Mid-Thirties Slightly Hot Mess Female Seeking Billionaire: Chapter 25

Sarah

Dear Diary,

I am going to die. Please don’t miss me too much. You may visit me at the cemetery anytime. I cannot believe my luck. I guess I really wasn’t joking when I said I was a hot mess.

Always yours, sunny and silly Sarah.

‘Oh my gosh, Isabel,’ I whisper to my friend on the phone as I run around my apartment tidying up. ‘What did I do?’

‘I do not know what you were thinking, Sarah,’ she says, and I can tell that there’s a tone of amusement in her voice. ‘I thought you said you weren’t that good yet.’

‘I mean, I’m not the best in the class, but I’m okay. At least that’s what the teacher told me.’

‘Are you sure the teacher didn’t tell you that because she wants to make more money from you?’

I think back to my pole dancing lessons and how the teacher had told me I was one of the best in the class. I bite down on my lower lip because I know what Isabel is saying is correct. I’m not the worst in the class, but that’s because the worst woman in the class can’t even get up the pole at all.

‘Okay. You might be a little bit right, but that’s not going to help me right now because he’s coming over and I think he’ll be here within an hour.’

‘I mean, who knows? Maybe he will like your moves,’ Isabel says doubtfully. ‘Though, I’m very confused as to why you invited your boss over, seeing as…’

‘Not now,’ I glare into the phone and sigh. ‘Do not ask me why I invited Ethan over.’

‘I mean, I know why you invited Ethan over,’ Isabel giggles. ‘Because you love him, because you want to do him,’ she sings and I wrinkle my nose.

‘I do not love him. Are you crazy?’

‘I was just joking, but I think you’re being very defensive right now.’ She pauses. ‘You’re not developing feelings for this douche bag, are you?’

‘Would I develop feelings for a douche bag?’

‘Yes,’ she says adamantly. “Yes, you would.’

‘I know. Okay, so there’s something that I have to admit.’

‘Oh my gosh. Please do not tell me you’re in love with this man.’ She groans. ‘If you think you’re in love with him, you need to send him a message and tell him to go home and not bother coming over.’

‘I’m not in love with him. I mean, I think he’s funny and I think he’s cute and you know I have for a long time.’

‘Yeah, but that was fine when he was ignoring you,’ she says. ‘Because then it was just a fantasy in your head. Now he’s been inside of you. That means something.’

I groan loudly. ‘Why do I cringe every time you say that?’

‘I don’t know,’ she says, laughing. ‘I mean, how old are you if you cringe when I say he was inside of you?’

‘I think I could be 60 or 70 and I would still be cringing thinking about that.’

‘You weren’t cringing when he was doing you though.’

‘Oh my gosh, Isabel,’ I scream at her and she bursts out laughing.

‘I’m glad I can make you laugh. I’m just trying to lighten the mood for you.’

‘Should I just tell him I was joking?’

‘No. You need that 20 grand, right?’

‘Of course I need 20 grand. Don’t you need 20 grand?’

‘Yes, and if you want to send him over to my house, I’ll give him a lap dance for 20 grand.’

‘Isabel.’ I frown. ‘You’re joking, right?’

‘Uh-oh, are you getting a little bit jealous?’

‘No. Why would I be jealous?’

‘Because you don’t want me giving your man a lap dance.’

‘He’s not my man,’ I say. I pause as I hear my phone pinging. ‘Hold on. I just got a message.’ I open my texts and freeze. ‘It’s Ethan and he says he’s 15 minutes away.”

“Shit.”

‘Oh my gosh. I’m about to hyperventilate, Isabel,’ I groan. ‘He’s going to be here in 15 minutes.’

‘Well, is everything ready?’

‘I mean, my place is as clean as it’s going to be. The pole is up. I just need to shave my legs one more time.’

‘What do you mean you need to shave your legs one more time?’

‘Well, I shaved yesterday, but you know hair grows in quickly and I don’t want to be upside down and hairs poking out where they shouldn’t be.’

‘Oh my gosh, Sarah,’ she laughs. ‘You really are a hot mess, aren’t you?’

‘Thank you. That makes me feel amazing.’

‘You’ve got this. Trust me, he’s most probably not even going to be paying attention to your dancing because he’s going to be looking at you and you’re going to be looking so hot. He’s just going to want you.’

‘Well, he knows that he’s going to be hands off because…’

‘Because what,’ she asks.

‘Because he’s not coming over to bang me.’

‘Okay, good luck with that.’

‘What? I’m serious.’

‘I know you’re serious, but the other day you were telling me you never wanted to see him again and he was a jackass, and now he’s coming over to your place so you can do some sort of pole dance for him? Like, girl, what is going on?’

’20 grand is what’s going on, and he said he’s going to bring cash.’

‘Ooh, 20 grand in cash sounds like a pretty cool thing.’ She pauses. ‘If you get it, will you show me?’

‘Will I show you what? The pole dance?’

‘No.’ She makes a vomiting sound. ‘I don’t want to see you pole dancing, but I do want to see 20 grand in cash.’

‘Fine,’ I say. ‘When I get it, I will show you. Anyway, I got to go. I’ll speak to you later.’

“Okay. Good luck, I love you..”

I hang up the phone and quickly rush to the bathroom so I can do a dry shave. I take a deep breath and then put on the outfit I’d had planned. It was a leotard from my tap dancing days and it was slightly too tight. I grab a tutu and wrap it around my waist. If I’m going to be hanging upside down, I do not want my vagina lips hanging out for any reason.

The doorbell rings and I freeze. It’s only been 10 minutes. I take a deep breath and head towards the door. Ethan is standing there with a cocky smirk on his face. I stare into his blue eyes.

‘You’re early,’ I say.

‘Well, much better than being late.’ He pushes past me and walks into the apartment. ‘So are you ready to earn that money?’ He holds up his briefcase and I just stare at him as I close the door.

‘Really, Ethan?’

‘What?’ He says, looking at me with a confused expression.

‘Earn that money? Why don’t you just say you want to make it rain on me?’

‘I mean, if you want me to, I can throw dollars on you as you’re moving up and down that pole.’

I lick my lips nervously. I don’t know about moving up and down the pole. I can barely get up and do a spin, but I’m not about to tell him that.

‘Anyway,’ I say. ‘I just want you to understand one thing.’

‘Yes? What is that?’

‘Nothing is going down tonight. This isn’t a precursor to sex. This isn’t a precursor to a lap dance. This isn’t a precursor to any sort of dirty thing that might be in your mind right now.’

‘I know,’ he says, looking around my apartment. ‘We already determined that it was just to see the moves of the best pole dancer in New York City.’ He smiles at me widely. ‘I am really excited to see how the best performs.’

I narrow my eyes as I stare at him. Why do I have a feeling that he knows that I’m not the best? Maybe because he’s seen me dancing on a table and nearly fall, but I’m not going to even acknowledge that.

‘You may have a seat on the couch over there,’ I say.

‘Thank you,’ he says as he sits down. ‘So are we just going to get right to it or…’

‘I mean, that’s why you’re here, right?’

He smirks. ‘No drink or anything?’

‘What do you mean or anything?’

‘I don’t know. I know you love Chinese food. I figure maybe you might’ve ordered some.’

‘Oh, are you hungry?’ I say quickly. ‘I can get some crackers and cheese for you if you want.’

He stares at me for a couple of seconds and shakes his head. ‘No, but thank you for the offer.’

‘Would you like something to drink? I have a bottle of wine. I think I have a Merlot and I have a couple of ciders.’

‘Any beer?’

‘No.’ I shake my head. ‘I don’t really buy beer. I’m not really a beer girl. I mean, I’ll drink it sometimes, but…’ I pause as I realize I’m mumbling. ‘Anyway. You don’t care about that. Cider or wine for alcohol or orange juice or water.’

‘I will have a cider, please,’ he says, leaning back and looking around. ‘Your place is really nice.’

‘It’s small. Nothing like yours.’

‘But it’s very well decorated.’

‘Thanks,’ I say, smiling at him. ‘I like to think that I could have been an interior decorator in another life.’

‘Is that something you have interest in?’ He says as I head over to the fridge to grab him a cider.

‘Oh, no. I mean I like it, but I could never be a professional.’ I shake my head as I head back with the cider. ‘Why?’

‘Oh, I was just wondering if that was something you were interested in pursuing. You know we have a lot of different avenues and opportunities at the company.’

‘I know,’ I say. ‘But I’m more interested in the writing part, you know, and music.’

‘I know,’ he says. ‘Your jingle was amazing.’

‘It was okay,’ I say. ‘Have we heard anything from Lord Chambers yet?’

He smirks. ‘Actually, yes. It was like I said, he loved it but wanted to make some changes.’

‘Oh, what change?’ I ask.

‘He said he’ll let me know. I told you.’

‘I guess you are the king of knowing all things, huh?’

“Yeah. I think so.” He smirks.

I roll my eyes, then head to my phone and turn on my small Bose speaker. “I’m going to dim the lights,’ I say. ‘And play some music and then get going if that’s okay.’

‘Perfect,’ he says. ‘I’m excited to see you dance.’

I take a deep breath and smile and go to my phone and scroll through my music. I’m not even sure what I should perform to. I think about doing Beyonce’s new country music song, but the beat won’t exactly go with what I have in mind. I then go to Ed Sheeran, but I know that’s not going to work. I finally settle on a Lil Wayne song from back in the day. I press play and music fills my apartment.

‘Okay,’ he nods his head. ‘I feel like I’m at the club.’

‘Uh-huh,’ I say, as I head towards the pole.

I close my eyes for a couple of seconds and then count down in my head, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. I grab a hold of the pole and twirl around. I can see that Ethan is staring at me intently. I feel powerful. I feel sexy. I love this feeling. I love dancing. I love being admired, especially by someone like Ethan.

I think about what Isabel had said on the phone about my feelings for him, about if I’m falling in love and it’s weird because I know it’s way too soon to be falling in love. Just because we slept together didn’t mean anything, but I definitely have strong feelings for him and I definitely feel a connection.

I can hear Ethan tapping his foot against the floor and I try not to look over at him. I know I’ll feel intimidated. Instead, I lift a leg and wrap it around the pole and start making my way up. I’m singing along to the song to try and keep in beat. I’m having difficulty sliding up. I try to remember what my teacher said. I try to be sexy. I try to put on the best show that I can.

As I spin around, I look over at Ethan and I see his hands on his pants and for a few seconds I think he’s unzipping himself. He’s not about to play with himself, is he? I twist my neck to look at him better and I’m not sure what happens, but the next thing I know, I’m sliding down and falling and my head has hit the ground.

‘Ow,’ I cry out.

I can hear Ethan chuckling as he jumps up. ‘Oh my gosh. Are you okay?’ He says, as he hurries over to me. There’s a look of concern on his face.

‘Were you about to jack off?’ I accuse him as my head starts pounding.

He looks down at me in confusion. ‘What?’

‘I saw your hands on your pants and…’

‘I was just smoothing my pants down,’ he says. ‘Are you crazy? Do you think I’m some sort of creep? I’m not going to jack off as you try to dance on a pole. Really, Sarah, you think that of me?’

‘I don’t know. I just…’ I press my lips together. I have not felt this embarrassed in a long time. And that’s saying a lot.

‘Sarah, are you…’ He kneels down then and looks at me. ‘Oh fuck,’ he says as he touches the side of my face gingerly. His expression changes to one of worry.

‘What? What is it?’

‘You’re bleeding,’ he says. ‘You’ve hit your head harder than you thought.’

‘Oh, no,’ I groan. ‘I can’t believe this.’

‘You’re going to have to go to the hospital.’

‘No,’ I say quickly. ‘I’ll be fine.’ I moan as he reaches below me and picks me up. ‘What are you doing?’

‘I’m taking you to the hospital,’ he says. ‘I don’t care what you have to say. You’ve just fallen and hit your head and now you’re bleeding.’ He sighs. ‘I guess I was correct when I said you were clumsy.’

‘I’m not clumsy,’ I moan. ‘I…’

‘Sarah, stop arguing with me.’ He sighs. ‘I knew this was not a good idea.’

‘What do you mean you knew this wasn’t a good idea?’ My head pounds. ‘Ow, I think I’ve got a headache.’

‘I hope that’s all it is,’ he says, staring down at me. ‘I will say, you look very sexy, and the beginning of the dance started well, but overall I’m going to give you a four out of 10.’ He chuckles. ‘Definitely not the best pole dancer in New York City.’

‘Thanks a lot, Ethan. Thanks for nothing.’

‘I’m just saying,’ he says, as he heads towards the door. ‘But you know what?’

‘What?’ I glare at him.

‘Let’s just get you taken care of,’ he says quickly. ‘I want to make sure everything’s okay.’ There’s worry in his tone. ‘Let me take care of you. Okay, Sarah?’

‘Fine,’ I mumble. I’m surprised he’s being so caring and I hate how much I love it.