Chapter 1

A

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One

My distorting mind drifted to a few minutes earlier when a much grin graced lips. The glance at the silverware lined up beside the dishes and lighted smelling fragrance smoke caressed my nostrils. Everything seemed perfect for the night. The positivity this would work buried every doubt.

The cling from the silverware on the ceramic plate drew me back our dinner. My appetite evaporated well as every other hope of having night. I could not tell what had stolen , maybe the sight of the splattered food around the table, the already burnt–out candles or the fact that Thomas had not said a word to me.

At intervals, I would look up to find him munching on each bite of the spaghetti meatballs I had prepared specially for the day.

every , he took a glance at the screen of his phone. I wanted speak, to tell him to look at me instead. We would share smile maybe laugh over old memories, and he would me that he loved me. But I could tell he was ignorant of so much that it boiled down in my belly. The churn did not stop and my mind wandered far.

“Darling, do you know what day it is?

finally out.

“What?” He asked in between a bite.

I mean today’s date?”

“This is the 17th of May, why?”

I returned to my meal without another word, noticing eyes on the screen again.

“Would you not pick up your call?” I asked.

“Not important,” He said firmly without looking up, happening today? You didn’t mention.‘

I dropped the cutlery, gulping down a water, Today is birthday darling,” He paused, finally looking up.

“It’s today?”

“Yes, I share the same birthday with Catherine personal assistant. Did ” I asked.

He did not reply but moved his eyes again to screen of his phone.

“She is the one calling she ”

“Who?”

“Catherine.”

“I don’t know what are talking about.”

Chapter Cave Bangna

273

“I saw the wrapped present in your drawer two days ago. At first, I thought it was for me, but then, I grew too curious and went through it. I never asked you for a lingerie, that was when I realized it wasn’t for me,”

Thomas avoided my eyes as I searched for his. I had done it again, reading him like a book. He hated it when I did that. His silence choked me, sapping me of what was left of me. At times like this, I wanted him to cook up something just to see me happy. To say comforting words, speak lies that would elevate my hurting heart at least I would feel the warmth his attempt to make me calm I would have preferred he had said he had an ageing disease that made him important details about me than to face the reality right in front of me, the that clearly showed that he was running out of

love for me.

“I still don’t know what you are talking about

“You clearly forgot about my birthday but you got a present for another lady whose birthday is today. What is there not to understand?”

“Oh, I see,” He dropped the cutlery from his grip,

“What?” I asked.

“That’s the reason for this meal and why you sent all servants away?”

“I wanted to do something special for us. You never seem to be at home anymore. We don’t do anything together. It’s like we are…”

“Regina! Is this the reason for this meal? To tell me what should do in this marriage?”

“We have been married for twenty years Thomas and every year you never forget my birthday not until last year. What has changed?” My voice quivered and my throat went dry again.

“I think I have lost my appetite.” He yanked off the chair to the ground, cold sweat rushed down my forehead as I watched him walk away.

“Thomas! Where are you going?”

“Don’t wait up for me, I’ll be back He said those words without even looking back, with every passing day, a stalk of our marriage faded away but I was willing to give it a chance.

I waited up for Thomas, sitting on the couch of the room we shared together in my night robe. He came back just as I predicted with stress of the long day written all over him. On nights like this, he would crave for my touch, caress his skin and his wounded tired mind.

“Hey Thomas,” I said calmly.

“You startled me, what are doing? I thought I told not to wait up for me.”

“Well, it’s not midnight yet and it’s still my birthday. We still make it fun.” I ignored his

questions, leaving the couch I strolled towards him and I took the robe I’m sorry about the dinner, I didn’t mean to upset you.

I touched his shoulders.

Chapter One: Regina’s Dilemma

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“Regina you have to go to bed, I have had a long day and I need to rest.” He took down my hands moving from me.

know you had a long day me take care of you. I’d wrap my arms around you like I used to and I moved in for peck but Thomas stopped me halfway pushing me aside.

“Stop it! Put back your robe and go to bed! I think you should find something to do with your time other than being over dramatic. You aren’t the only one birthday ”

Tears welled in my aging eyes from within aching heart, Do me attractive anymore?”

asked looked

“Answer me! Do not love me enough to with me anymore? Back then not resist me. What has changed Thomas? Tell me what has changed?”

His silence was like the sharp edges of a dagger that pierced through me. Slowly, could feel every bit of the growing agonizing pain.

yearned for a response, something that would plant another seed of hope. But he said nothing. With every second that passed, I became an even more bitter wife. “Do you still want me here?” My voice choked as hot tears flowed freely. He pulled further away towards the

door.

“Regina, I do not have time for this drama tonight.”

“Where are you going? You just returned.”

He put on his shirt and walked out towards the door. I hoped he turned and looked at me so he would tell me that he was sorry and he wanted me but he did not turn back nor call out to me.