Chapter 34

Hannah “Do you have to go on this business trip?” I ask Tobias. We are snuggling in bed after having sex, and funnily enough, I’m the big spoon.

Though, I can’t say I’m complaining. My man needs to feel precious and taken care of sometimes. I bet his employees would find it funny if they knew that Tobias likes being fissed about. He is really enjoying my hands massaging his sculpted, muscular back.

“Oh, that feels nice…” Tobias mumbles and stretches like a cat when I knead his back harder. It makes his ass jut out, but I’m deliberately ignoring it. I would get horny again if I touched it. I continue to work his back and remind him about the topic. “About that business trip?” “Right…” Tobias inhales. “Before I go, we should get a restraining order against your mom. I don’t want her showing up at your college or something while I’m gone.”

“That would be a good idea,” as sad as it is, it would be wise. “I love my mom, but… I want to finish my exams in peace.”

any friend you could invite here while “Understandable…” Tobias is quiet for a while. “Is there I’m gone? I don’t like leaving you alone in such a large mansion. If you don’t have one, I will call Winnie.”

A smile flits over my lips. Winnie seemed nice, and I wouldn’t mind her coming over. It would be amazing to make friends with her, especially if she ends up together with one of Tobias’s brothers.

“I would love it if you called her, and then… maybe I can ask Caroline to come over too? I haven’t seen her since the fire, but she recently asked if I wanted to go out and look at Andrew’s hockey match. She said the game isn’t important, but she wants to check out the players.”

Tobias turns tense at that, and then he grumbles. “I’m the only man you should be checking out…”

I snort in amusement. “I know! This is for Caroline, not for me. She is single and looking for a man.”

Tobias relaxes a little, then mutters. “Do you promise you won’t be looking at some other man’s abs while I’m gone?”

Does he actually think I would do that? Even after I basically revealed that he is the only man for me?

“You’re the only man that I want,” I murmur into his back. He smells nice, and I kiss his smooth, hot skin.

When Tobias leaves for Europe, the days slow down. I study in the mornings and watch TV with Caroline and Winnie late at night. They both agreed on coming on over.

It makes sleeping easier now that my man is gone. I don’t have to fear the dark when all three of us lounge and live in the living room. But the thing that is worrying is that our diet consists of chocolate, cake, chips, cole, and lots of ranch dip.

Every day is a sleepover, and we are just lazy. But after a month of living the dream, Caroline raises an eyebrow at me. “Damn, Hannah… not to be mean, but I think you should slow down on the cake.”

“Hm?” I blink at her from my place in the armchair. I’m devouring a chocolate cake and follow her gaze to my stomach. I frown. “Yeah… perhaps it’s time to get a gym membership…” Winnie laughs. “Are you sure you’re not pregnant? You quit birth control, but even on those pills, you aren’t a hundred percent safe. Like, what if Tobias got you pregnant way before he left? Because I hate to say it, but you look more than a month pregnant.”

“That would be the dream,” I say softly, looking down at what resembles a baby bump. “But… the test showed negative this morning.”

“Oh… well, sometimes those tests aren’t that reliable,” Caroline pops chips into her mouth. and chews. “I had a friend whose test showed negative until she was six months pregnant.”

My hope threatens to spiral again, but I smash it down. I won’t let myself think I’m pregnant when I’m probably not. I want to be, but… what if I want it too much?

“It might be a phantom pregnancy,” I caress my stomach with a pout to my lips. “I want to have a baby so much that my body responds by making me fake pregnant. It’s rare, but it can happen…”

“Aw, Hannah…” Winnie’s face is filled with sympathy. “It will happen… eventually… and if it doesn’t, then your husband have more than enough money to take you to some clinic.”

“What if I’m infertile?” I tear up at my own words. They sadden me because I want Tobias’s kid. Sure, adoption is an option, but… I rather it did not come to that.

“If you’re so worried, we should definitely visit a clinic,” Winnie says and nods at my wallet.” Tobias left you with your debit card connected to his account, right? We should go tomorrow. I’m sure a private clinic would take you in immediately for the right price.”

I swallow thickly. “But won’t Tobias be mad that I’m wasting his money?”

“No, and especially not if you tell him what you used it for. That guy is dying to have a big family,” Winnie points out and sighs dreamingly. “I need to find myself a man…”

Winnie wants a man? Well, this is new. Should I tell my friend Jake to strike while the iron is hot? Or maybe she is into Mark? They are both fine men-she can’t go wrong with either pick.

Caroline groans. “Winnie, I’m sorry, but this conversation wasn’t about you. I get that you need to get laid and lose your v-card. I do, but could we please focus on Hannah’s baby problem first?”

“Right…” Winnie scratches behind her ear while thinking. “We should book you a time at the clinic. And before you cry about using your husband’s money, trust me, Tobias won’t mind. He will thank you later when there is a baby in your arms.”

Winnie is probably right. Tobias expressed his yearning for a baby, and I doubt he would be mad if I went to a clinic. If he knew, he would probably encourage me.

Should I tell him when he calls me later? Tobias calls me every night, but I want to keep this to myself…

only for now. is that wrong? Probably. Still, it’s very sensitive to talk about over the phone.

I can tell Tobias all about it when he comes back home. For now, I will investigate on my own.

“Okay,” I look at my friends, determined. “Let’s go to a clinic and see if I’m pregnant. Perhaps I could have them check and ensure I’m not infertile while we are at it.”

My biggest fear would come true if I couldn’t have children. Tobias wants to become a dad, and I’m worried that if I’m infertile, it might become a dealbreaker. What if he leaves me? He would have a good reason, then.