Chapter 35

Tobias It’s been close to five weeks since I left Hannah, and I hate to say it, but I will have to stay in this country for longer than six weeks.

The newly built hotel in southern Sweden is in utter chaos. The people they hired are unfriendly and unsuited to be my staff, and I’ve decided to personally run interviews to find people to hire.

It’s a pain in the fucking ass, but I have to do this. It’s important the people working for me carry the friendly spirit that Ford Hotels stand for. I’m sure Hannah will understand when I call her. I miss her like crazy, and after this nightmare of a recruitment train is over, I’m- taking time off work for a month.

I want to teach Hannah how to drive and take her on a road trip along the coast. Eat good food, watch the sunset, and go swimming as much as possible, possibly even surfing. My brothers and I are all talented at that, but Mark is the best one on the board.

“Tobias?”

Hook up from my computer and do a half-spin in my chair. As usual, Sarah doesn’t knock. She is standing in my office with a nervous smile on her lips, and I resist the urge to sigh. “What do you want?” I can’t hide the irritation in my voice. Sarah doesn’t deserve it, but I can’t help it. Seeing her just sets me off in a bad mood. I can’t relax around her, probably because we have so much history.

“Nothing special, I’m just… umm…” she takes her freedom to sit in the chair in front of my desk. “I know that you chose Hannah, and I respect that. I do, but I would still like to talk.”

I notice she must have done another surgery on her face. This time, her cheeks are sharper. She looks skinnier, too… hmm.

Did she use Daniel’s money?

I find it odd that Sarah had another surgery. I thought she divorced Daniel. Does her surgery mean she took a lot of his assets with her? Probably. I mean, she is still on the board and everything.

“Alright,” I say, relaxing my shoulders because there is an odd air around Sarah. She seems less edgy.

“What do you want to talk about?”

Sarah takes a deep, shuddering breath. “I’m just going to come on out and say it.”

“Mmm?”

“As you may have noticed, I’ve lost a lot of weight.”

“Yes…” I look her up and down. Sarah looks as thin and white as a ghost these days, but that’s none of my business to point out. “It’s hard not to notice that you’re rather thin.”

“It’s because of my condition,” she grimaces. “I suffer from cachexia. It eats your muscles and usually leads to extreme weight loss…”

I stare at her, eyes hard. “But to get that symptom…” I can’t say it, and Sarah gives me a sad smile.

“I’m going to die, Tobias. My cancer was discovered too late, and I’ve been given a year. Perhaps I die before a year has passed, or maybe I live a little longer, but that is unlikely.” My chest draws tight, and to make matters worse, Sarah sits there and smiles as if she isn’t dying. I also suspect she can read my mind and knows I care because her lips twitch.

“Look, you don’t have to say anything, but I want you to know that I’m divorcing Daniel because I understood who I’m in love with way too late. I thought I could forget about when I found that I was dying, it wasn’t Daniel who I wanted beside me. It was you.”

you, but I stare at her, entirely speechless. It all makes sense now. Sarah used to be manipulative and sneaky.

She got together with Daniel to make me jealous, to make me beg to get her back.

And the reason she came back for me, divorced Daniel, and wanted me back as her husband or boyfriend so suddenly must be because-

Shit.

I suck sticky air into my lungs, barely able to talk without my conflicting emotions bleeding into my voice.

“You knew, didn’t you? You’ve known for a while and didn’t tell me. This is why Daniel came to me and said he just wished for you to be happy. He also knew you were dying.” “Correct… this is why he isn’t angry with me. Daniel knows I won’t be around for long and respects my dying wish, which is for you and me to get another chance.”

“Sarah…” pain laces my voice. “You know that I’m with Hannah. She is my wife. Even if you’re dying, I can’t…”

“I’m sure she would understand if you said I was dying,” Sarah tries and reaches out her arm to place her cold, smaller hand over mine. When I look at her, her bottom lip trembles. “One date. One date is all I ask for, and everything will be fine. I will give you and Hannah my blessing, but I want just one night of you and me talking over wine. We don’t have to kiss or hug. Just hang out and talk about life, the future, and… us.”

“That sounds a lot like cheating.”

“It won’t be!” Sarah assures me. Her hand is clutching mine. “Not if you tell Hannah about it! Just tell her the truth; I’m sure she won’t mind. Come on, Tobias. I’m desperate and dying!” “I…” I pause, hesitating about what to say or do. There is a constricting feeling within me. I’m hurting for Sarah. I feel sorry for her, but taking her out on a date feels wrong. “I can’t…” “Why not?” Sarah’s eyes are shiny with tears, and her voice is a barely audible whisper. It hurts seeing my ex-wife like this: so in love with me and filled with want when my whole heart belongs to someone else. It’s painful because… yes, I love Hannah more than anything in this world, but once upon a time, I would have done anything for Sarah.

Funny how the heart can have a change of mind…

I gently remove her hand from mine. “Because while you will die happy having had your last night with me, eating dinner with you will cause future problems between my wife and me. Hannah might think I’m only with her because you’re dead, which isn’t true. She is my choice, and I must stick with that choice while you’re alive.”

“But… but what if she doesn’t have to know?” Sarah asks. “What if we head out for dinner, just you and I, one last time, and Hannah doesn’t have to know about it?”