Chapter 58

I knew this day would come. It was impossible to ignore, especially with how Cole’s assistant spent days coordinating the next five weeks of my life, but time flew by way too fast.

“It’s only five weeks,” Rafael says as we stop outside the glass sliding doors leading into the airport. Earlier, he had insisted on parking his truck and walking me to the entrance, and while I was resistant at first, I’m glad he came to see me off.

I wrap my arms around his waist and hug him so hard, he groans.

“Are you feeling okay about the flight?” he asks.

“Nope.”

“Great. What’s nine hours of anxiety anyway?”

“Sounds like a typical day for me.”

Rafael chuckles. He kisses the top of my head before I let go of him. “Are you sure you’ll be okay?”

I put on my best brave face. “I’ll do my best.”

He stares at me for a few beats. “You’ll call me when you land?”

“For the fifth time already, yes.” Funny how we went from hardly ever speaking to one another to acting like two teenagers who can’t go to sleep without talking about anything and everything.

With one last mind-numbing kiss, Rafael heads back to the crosswalk that leads to the parking garage. I’m an emotional being, so I’m already crying before even walking inside the airport.

When he catches me wiping at the corners of my eyes, he laughs, and I flip him off before turning to the sliding doors. I take one step before pausing to glance over my shoulder.

“If you want to make your flight, you should get going,” Rafael says.

“I know.”

“You’ve got this.”

I throw him a thumbs-up before rolling my shoulders back and heading inside. My anxiety spikes as soon as I enter the busy Detroit airport, but I remind myself that I’ve been here before and done this once already.

“Here goes nothing,” I grumble to myself as I head to the security checkpoint.

I make it through without any hiccups. With time to kill before my flight to London, I check out some stores, although I don’t have Nico here to distract me with a hundred different questions.

My chest aches, and I rub at the spot as I think about the way he looked when we said our goodbyes back at Rafael’s house earlier. If it weren’t for his father encouraging me to leave, I doubt I would have found the courage to get in the truck and leave Nico behind, especially after I saw the way his bottom lip quivered as he held back his tears.

It’s just five weeks, Ellie. They’ll be here when you get back.

I head to my gate, only to find out my group was called twenty minutes ago.

“Shit.” I hand the employee my phone with the boarding pass before heading down the bridge.

My legs are trembling as I consider my new reality for the next nine hours, but I do my best to focus on the exercises Rafael taught me.

When deep breathing doesn’t work, I envision the video he showed me about airplanes and Jell-O, and that seems to temporarily do the trick until I get on the plane and am told by the person in my seat that I got the wrong one.

“No. I’m 17E.”

He checks his phone and shows me his boarding pass, confirming that he is in the right seat. With a frown, I tug my phone from the front pocket of my backpack and check my boarding pass again.

6G?

I walk in the direction of the first-class cabin. I’m confused, wondering if Cole upgraded me from business to first-class within the last hour while the polite flight attendant leads me to my seat.

“Thanks.” My heart is racing in my chest as I struggle to lift my bulging carry-on in the bin. With one last hard shove, it slides into place, and I shut it before a flight attendant tells me I need to check it instead.

No way am I parting with my prized possessions like that.

I’m jittery by the time I take a seat. The temptation to rush out the door is riding me hard. If I wanted, I could leave and try this all again tomorrow. I doubt Rafael would mind turning around to come pick me up—

“Hey.”

My head whips to the side, and my mouth falls open at the sight of my first-class seatmate.

Rafael sits down next to me, and I stare at him for a few seconds before finally recovering.

“What are you doing here?”

“I was in the mood for a trip to London.”

“You what?”

He shrugs as if he didn’t just blow my mind. “I wasn’t sure if you needed me to come, so I packed a carry-on just in case and asked my family to watch Nico.”

“Oh my God.”

“Is it too much?”

It’s…

Everything. I reach over the middle compartment dividing our seats and rope my arms around him. “Thank you.”

“While I can’t follow you around Europe…” He sighs longingly. “I thought I could at least help you through the hardest part.”

My eyes mist over. “This may be one of the nicest things someone has done for me.”

“We’ve got to work on setting your bar a little higher.”

“Are you kidding? If you keep this up, no one will ever compare.”

“Just how I like it.”

I laugh, and he kisses the crown of my head.

When he holds out his hand for me, I grab it with a smile. I want to say the three big words that have been floating around in my head all week, and I want to say them now.

“Rafa?”

He looks up from his phone. “Yeah?”

“I love you.”

His eyes soften right before his brows scrunch. He opens his mouth, only to shut it again.

“You don’t have to say it back. I just wanted you to know.”

He brings our interlaced fingers to his lips and kisses the back of my hand. “When I say it back—and I promise, I will—it’s going to be somewhere without any witnesses.”

“I’m holding you to that.”

He gives my hand a squeeze. “Deal.”