24. WAKE UP

"Wake up, you idiot! We have to clean all this shit up before your dad gets back!" I yelled as I shook Timothy's body. He lay in his bed in his room which miraculously had been left clean. Unlike my room. Found some puke in a cup. Other than that it was okay.

Timothy groaned and rolled onto his other side.

"No, you're not sleeping through this, do you want your dad to find out?!"

"Stop screaming!"

"Then get up!" I yelled even louder.

Timothy groaned again and stumbled out of bed. He went into the bathroom.

"Hurry up!" I said before running down the stairs.

Red cups everywhere, the floor was sticky from all the beer and... teenage angst.

I began cleaning up and ten minutes later, a groggy Timothy in sweats joined me.

He didn't say a word. I knew he wasn't a morning person but today was even worse.

"Bad hangover?"

Timothy just rolled his eyes.

"Ouch! You're even bitchier than normal. Did you get your period or something?"

Timothy raised his middle finger at me which made me laugh.

I gave him a playful shove and finally he smiled a little. Then his smile faded.

"Josh?"

"Yeah?"

"Did we kiss last night?"

I froze in place. Holy fuck. Why did he remember?

"We did?!" Timothy almost looked scared.

"No, of course not!" I blared. "I'm straight! Do you think I would let you kiss me?! Just the thought makes me sick!" I screamed. I walked to the other side of the room, turning my back on him.

"Probably just one of your perverted fantasies. You probably thought of me while fucking your boyfriend last night too but don't get it twisted: I'm not a fag like you." I picked up a few cups.

I looked behind me and for the first time in a while Timothy looked genuinely hurt by what I said. I felt terrible. But what else could I do? I couldn't have him think I kissed him. And since the idea upset him so much, I had to talk it out of his head.

I saw Charlie's death-mobile drive into the driveway. Great.

He opened the door and came inside.

"Is your dad here yet?" Charlie asked.

T shook his head. "No."

"Okay." Charlie sighed. "Good."

He was just standing by the door peering at Timothy with big eyes. He didn't say anything.

"Are you here to help clean this up?" T asked.

Charlie raised his eyebrows and looked away. "Yeah. Totally."

Why did he seem so nervous?

It took us about an hour to get the house back to normal.

"Can we talk outside?" Charlie asked then, grabbing T's hand.

Timothy seemed a little wary now too. "Sure.."

I knew they wanted alone time. That's why they literally left the house. But.. I was too curious. I needed to know what he had to say. Did this have something to do with Charlie's sudden sad behavior yesterday?

They sat in the backyard so I opened a window and listened in on their conversation. They were sitting on the wooden bench with their backs to the window.

"My dad's going back to Australia. Since my parents' divorce it was just kind of a matter of time before that happened." Charlie took a deep breath.

Timothy just watched him, looking nervous.

"And he's making me come with him. He said he'd cut me off if I didn't and my mom agreed with him."

"You're leaving?" Timothy sounded breathless. I could hardly make out his voice over the wind.

"I have to. I'm going to finish school in Australia and then go to college there. They decided."

"Can't you just stay and work or something?"

"I can't just drop out and start working, I'll never make enough. And I can't live with Allie because of her mom and you-"

"You can live with us!" Timothy insisted.

"Your dad would never allow that."

"I can try! I can ask him!"

"Timmy, I.. I want to try this thing with my dad. I know we don't get along now but for the first time in years he seemed happy again at the thought of going back home. And he listened to me. He actually showed interest in my life for the first time since the divorce. I think.. I think maybe we could be good again. Like we used to be. And that's all over if I don't go with him."

Timothy was quiet. He was looking at his lap and fiddling with his fingers.

"Maybe you could come with me." Charlie said softly.

My heart broke at the idea.

Timothy looked up. He looked so hopeful. "Really?"

"There's nothing I want more, you know that. But your dad-"

"I'll convince him! I'm sure he'll let me go! He wants me to be happy!"

Charlie didn't look convinced but he smiled anyway. Charlie kissed Timothy gently. That was the first time I'd seen him kiss him so innocently. Truly lovingly.

I felt nauseous again. And I felt my throat tighten. Timothy was leaving?

"When are we going?" Timothy asked.

"In three days." Charlie smirked apologetically.

"Why did you wait so long to tell me!"

"Because I thought we'd be over and I didn't want you to be sad. But.. at least there's hope now."

✪

Timothy helped his dad make dinner that day. He was being extra good.

Joe hadn't noticed anything. He had no clue about the party.

Timothy placed a pan with chicken breasts on the table.

Joe served the rice and sat down with us.

"So, are you going to tell me what you want? You're being awfully nice and helpful. You even touched the chicken!"

"Yeah." T chuckled nervously.

I quietly ate my food. Guess T's birthday gift will be a farewell one. I frowned and kept eating.

"Did something break at the party yesterday?" Joe asked.

"No."

"Then what is it?"

"Um.." T played with his food. "We should talk about it later."

Joe's shoulders lowered and he looked worried now. "Oh."

"It's nothing bad!" T insisted.

"Then will you please just tell me? You're driving me crazy!"

T glanced at me.

"I'll keep my mouth shut. Promise." I said.

"Um.. okay." T mixed his rice and veggies. "Charlie came over today.."

"Did you have sex?!" Joe screamed.

"No! Dad, please!"

"Okay! I'm just checking." Joe shook his head.

Timothy sighed. "He told me he's moving back to Australia."

"Oh." Joe sounded surprised but also relieved. Then he looked at Timothy's face and adjusted. "Well, I'm sorry, kiddo."

"A-and.. He asked me.." T speared some chicken on his fork. "I want to go with him."

"What, to Australia?"

"Yes."

"Are you serious?"

"Yes.. Why wouldn't I be?"

"You're seriously thinking about moving across the world for some boy?!"

"I'm not thinking about it, I want to."

"So... that's what this is?" Joe gestured to the food. "Your going away meal? When's he leaving?"

T looked at his lap. "In three days." He mumbled.

Joe laughed.

"It's a bit fast, I know. I could go in a week or a month, maybe.."

"Timothy, you're not going." Joe looked Timothy in the eyes.

"Dad,"

"I know you like him-"

"I love him!"

"Don't say that,"

"I mean it!"

"Well, you're too young. I'm not letting you leave the country with a nineteen year old."

"I'd be living with him and his dad! It wouldn't just be us two!"

"We both know that man is never home."

"He said he would spend more time at home." Timothy looked so hopeful. Even a little desperate as if his life was depending on this.

...Maybe it was.

"I don't care. Tim, you're my son. It's my job to raise you and I'm not done yet. I'm sorry if it sounds unfair but I'm protecting you. You know, maybe this is a good thing. That Charlie was too old for you anyway. And you need some space from him. I don't like this all-consuming thing you have with him, it's not healthy."

"It's called love!"

"No, it's called obsession! And frankly, I'm glad it's over! You will find someone better, I know you will."

Joe continued eating. I watched Timothy and he was just sitting there staring at his hands. I felt bad for him but I was also relieved. I didn't want him to leave.

"Will you at least think about it?" Timothy asked quietly.

Joe sighed. "I'm sorry. It's not happening. What kind of parent would I be if I let you go?"

"A good one."

"Timothy-"

He got up and walked away slamming the door behind him.

Joe glanced at the picture of Timothy's mom on the table and sighed.

I gave Joe a pat on his back.

"Was I too harsh?"

"No. He would've gotten mad either way." I shrugged.

"Do you think I'm being unreasonable?"

I shook my head.

"I think you made the right choice. You know, Charlie is choosing to be with his dad. And I think Timothy should do the same... If I had a dad like you I know I wouldn't leave."

Joe wrapped his arm around my shoulder.

"Thanks, kid."