Chapter Nineteen: Blood and Bonds

I stayed in that grassy hollow for hours, whining fading to silence as exhaustion took me. I fell asleep, dark grey fur matted with dirt, and woke to the morning sun stabbing my eyes. I'd shifted human in my sleep, the cold dawn air biting my bare skin, goosebumps prickling. At least I could feel that. The rest of me—chest, head, soul—felt numb, a dead weight I didn't want to carry. I'd vowed not to feel again after Natalie, and here I was, hollowed out worse than before. But duty gnawed—beta to Cade, pack ties I couldn't snap. I'd have to go back, eventually.

I shifted back, dark grey fur cloaking me warm, shaking off leaves and grass clinging like guilt. My stomach growled, a sharp ache, so I hunted—a rabbit darted through the underbrush, and I snagged it, teeth sinking in, blood hot and coppery on my tongue. It dulled the hunger, not the void.

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Two days gone, I wasn't even in our territory. I'd crossed the border into no-man's-land, a 50-kilometer stretch of wild nothing between us and the next pack—rogue country, lawless and thick with pine and risk. I could handle myself, claws and teeth sharp, but my sanity? That teetered, fraying with every step away from pack lands, every howl I swallowed.

I knew I couldn't stay. I turned back, an hour's lope bringing our border's scent—earth, sage, home. Matt's tawney wolf stood sentinel, ears up, dark eyes locking on me as I crossed. "Dude, you alright?" his voice linked, sharp with worry. "Where the hell'd you go?"

I shook my head, fur rippling. "Had to get away," I growled, paws scuffing dirt. "I might stay out here a bit longer." A sigh rumbled through me—not ready for the pack house, but the border's edge felt safer, a tether.

"I followed your scent here and waited," Matt said, wolf grin flashing. "Knew you'd come back eventually. Electra's been distraught."

My ears perked, head snapping to him. "Why?" Was it us not being mates—or had she played me, stoking feelings to watch me burn? Anger flared, but I shoved it down. Her face at the ceremony—shocked, sad—mirrored mine. No game there.

Matt stepped closer, eyes soft even in wolf form. "She knows you vanished for a month after Natalie. Thought you running was her fault, that you were gone for good."

That hit—Natalie's lie had me AWOL last spring, a detail stretched in pack gossip. "She didn't find her mate then?" I asked, curiosity clawing.

His ears drooped. "Nah, locked herself in her room for the last two days, won't budge."

I weighed staying out—days more to numb this—but duty and her pulled me back. "You got a clothes stash nearby?"

Matt padded off. "Yeah, this way." He dug under a pine, teeth dragging a burlap sack to me—pants, shirt, standard border cache for shredded shifts. I changed human, not caring Matt saw; we'd shifted plenty, no shame between pack. The rough cotton scratched, but it beat bare skin.

"Thanks," I nodded, voice gravelly. He dipped his head, resuming patrol, brown tail flicking as I turned for the pack house. Twenty minutes at a slow trudge, no rush—late afternoon sun slanted through the trees, casting long shadows on the path.

The pack house loomed, quiet, eerily still—wolves out or nursing hangovers from the party. I slipped inside, boots soft on hardwood, aiming for my room unseen. My body felt off—skin tight, warmth creeping up my spine, a buzz I couldn't place.

A door creaked down the hall—purple, hers—and I bolted for mine, hand on the knob. "Kyan!" Electra's voice rang, sharp and desperate. I froze, rubbing my neck, turning slow. "Uh... hey..."She walked toward me, green eyes tired, rimmed red—two days of no sleep etched in her face, cream sweater wrinkled, hair a mess. Still beautiful, damn it, her shy smile growing as she closed the gap. "Thank the Goddess you're alright," she said, voice trembling, and then she hugged me—arms tight, wildflower scent flooding my nose.

Tingles sparked, slow at first, a prickle where her hands gripped my back. Then—boom—my whole body erupted, pleasurable shivers racing under my skin, electric and alive. She pulled back, eyes wide, staring at her arms. "Do you feel this too?" Her gaze snapped to mine, searching.

I exhaled, shaky. "Yes." She reached out, fingers trailing my arm—tingles flared, hot and insistent, everywhere she touched. My breath hitched.

She looked up, curious, awed. "What does this mean?"

Stories flashed—elders' tales of mate bonds, sparks only the fated felt. "It means we're mates," I said, blunt, disbelief choking me. How?

Shock froze her. "How? I didn't feel anything on my birthday."

I shrugged, mind reeling, arms aching to pull her close. Maybe we'd blocked it—me running, her hurt—some fluke of the Moon Goddess's timing.

"Kyan?!" Cade's growl cut through, low and furious behind me. "Where the hell you been?" I turned, his hazel eyes blazing—concern warring with rage, jaw tight. Electra peeked from behind me, and his face shifted—pure, molten anger, fists balling. He'd known something was brewing between us, had caught the glances, the runs, but Callie and the baby kept him too tied up to dig deep. Now, it hit him square—his sister, his beta, tangled up after he'd laid down the law: no trouble with her.

He crossed his arms, voice dropping dark and heavy. "What's going on here?"

I mirrored him, glare hard. "She's my fated mate." Electra grabbed my elbow—tingles flared again, softening my edge. I looked down, her green eyes steadying me.

Cade yanked her arm, pulling her away. "Hey!" I snapped, shoving his chest, tugging her back. He growled, deep and alpha, and I snarled right back.

"I told you what'd happen if you went after her, Kyan!" he roared, fury spiking. "She can't be your mate—you felt nothing at the ceremony!" His yell rippled, wolves in the hall—Clara, some young ones—cowering under his alpha weight. It didn't faze me; my own anger burned hotter.

"I don't know how, but I feel it, Cade—she's mine," I shouted, voice raw, fists clenched.

He teetered on shifting, eyes flashing gold. "Kyan Theloneous Baxter, I, Alpha Cade Marcus Harris, hereby—" I cut him off, stepping forward, rage a living thing.

"I challenge you for alpha!" I bellowed, the words tearing free, gasps echoing—Matt, Shauna, others drawn by the noise. Cade seethed, teeth bared.

"Challenge accepted!" he roared, storming for the training field. I followed, Electra's hand brushing my arm—tingles again. "Kyan, what are you doing?" Her voice shook, concern raw.

I didn't know—anger drove me, blind and wild.

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The training field hummed, a crowd circling—wolves from the party, border guards, kids peering wide-eyed. Grass crunched underfoot, the air thick with sweat and tension, dusk painting the sky bruise-purple. We shifted fast, clothes ripping—my dark grey wolf, his big grey beast—jaws snapping, growls rumbling deep.

He lunged, teeth flashing; I dodged, spinning to snap at his back legs—missed. His jaws clamped my hip, tearing flesh, a hot gush of blood. I groaned, pain lancing, but pivoted quick, sinking teeth into his hind leg—bone snapped under my bite, a crack loud as thunder. He'd limp now, weakened.

He didn't let me savour it, twisting to rip at my face—my ear tore, a sharp sting, and I recoiled. We circled, him hobbling, me favouring my hip, blood slicking the grass. I lunged sudden, his bad leg buckling—he toppled, and I aimed for his neck. He rolled, snagging my front paw—bones crunched, agony flaring, a whimper escaping. I bit his muzzle, forcing him off, and he scrambled back.

Growls rumbled, his eyes on my limp paw, a wolfish grin gleaming. He swiped my back leg—claws raked deep, a long gash dropping me. His teeth flashed for my throat; I kicked hard, claws slashing his soft belly, blood spilling. He growled, reeling, and I shoved him over with my hind legs—jaws locked his neck, biting down. Bones cracked, blood flooded my mouth, his gasps ragged. Alpha fights were to the death, and I was seconds from claiming it.