Chapter 22: Falling...

After Noah but me to bed I couldn't sleep it was only 8pm and all I wanted to do was see everyone even though I knew they didn't want to see me.

The house was a lot quieter than it usually was, there was no laughter of the boys playing cards in the living room or chatter from the girls it was just silent. It made me feel on edge. I was waiting for someone to come and see me I mean maybe they just didn't want to see me.

I hadn't seen Kenzie since she was born and it's been over 3 months since I last saw them all. I wanted to cry thinking about the time I could've spent with them but I decided long ago that, that wasn't me anymore I didn't want to be sat around crying I wanted to be going to the gym and fighting.

As I laid on my side, I heard the door open and close, knowing someone was in here I turned to see Hailey walking to sit over on the chair next to me. I smiled at her but she didn't return it but that wasn't unexpected.

"Where have you been?" Hailey said harshly "I'm sorry okay" I said sitting up and resting against the headboard. "No you don't get to act like this!, like this isn't a big deal. You left knowing everyone was already upset and tired but of course! if the attention is off you for even a second you have to pull a stunt like this and have everyone looking for you. Half of the men missed Harry's funeral because of you, including Jeremiah!" She shouted letting her anger that I knew she had been building up.

"I did this for you guys! I said don't look for me but none of you idiots seem to get this message!" I shouted back being tired of told what to do and shouted at. "Jeremiah's been drunk nearly every night, he doesn't speak to anyone and if he does it's about you being gone or if they've found any information on you. Nobody's seen him in weeks" Hailey shouted back.

"What do you mean?" I said lowering my voice, "He took off 2 months after you left! He couldn't do it anymore, live in the same house you were in and know that you left him to fuck another guy!" She shouted. "What the hell are you talking about!" I shouted back in anger.

"Oh yeah the whole mafia knows, while we were all out searching for you, you were partying at a night club and fucking a stranger!" Hailey stood up shouting. "Where's Jeremiah!" I said standing up in pain as I did so. "Don't act like you fucking care Maeve or should I say Bella." Hailey said and by know I knew for a fact that the whole house had heard.

All of a sudden I heard Grayson's voice from outside. "Hailey will you go to Kenzie she's thrown up." Grayson said sounding tired. Hailey looked at me with death stares and left the room as Grayson entered.

"If your head to shout at me know your fiancé already did" I said walking slowly to my closet as it hurt. "Actually wife now but you wouldn't know would you because you left for another guy." Grayson said making my heart clench knowing I had missed so much.

"Where's Jeremiah?" I said knowing he would know. "On his way here, after Colton heard you got run over by a car he managed to convince Jeremiah to come back, I don't why Jeremiah bothers I would have left your ass a long time ago" "You think I want to be here? I had a life but of course I got taken out of it for the second time because Jeremiah can't help but wreck my life when something good is actually happening." I said as Grayson shook his head mumbling 'pathetic' under his breath before leaving my room, making me alone once again.

I quickly tried distracting myself from what had just happened, I walked into the bathroom removing the hospital gown I was once in to see bruises all along my stomach, legs and arms along with a massive bandage along ribs.

Instead of a shower I grabbed a cloth wiping my body as leant over the shower to do my hair. I let the tears slowly fall as I looked at myself in the mirror while putting my clothes on. Wearing a tight long sleeve top with black short shorts. Why can't these people just leave me alone? If they hated me so much why bring me back again?

—

After what happened with Grayson and Hailey I really did notice how tired and sad they looked after my actions again, i dreaded to see everyone else but I was thirsty so I walked down the all too familiar stairs seeing everyone sat outside while Kenzie sat in Louis's arms.

I didn't want to go out for obvious reasons so I just went to the kitchen and ended up grabbing some alcohol, I'm not supposed to drink it because of me being injured but when am I ever aloud to? I turned around to leave but only to crash into a hard chest.

"Parker" I said sounding not amused. "Ah Bella" he said sarcastically. I tried to walk past him to leave but he stood in my way. "You know I really didn't think you would leave us all to fuck another man?" He added being sarcastic again. "It's not like that" I said still trying to get past without looking up at him because I knew I would cry. "Then what is it like huh? Because I took your side before seeing the photos and ended up getting chocked and punched" Parker said as I looked down.

"What photos" I said trying to avoid him saying how he got punched on my behalf. "Oh you didn't know? While you and that other man were fucking Elijah and Taylor were snapping away to send us some photos" he said sarcastically once more.

"I'm sorr-" I began but got cut off "An apology isn't going to fix it this time, you've lost everyone I hope your happy with yourself" Parker said before leaving to go outside to Louis, Grayson, Hailey, Camila and Wesley.

I was about to head up to my bedroom but I remembered Parker had said about photos of me and Kaiden and I knew they would probably be in Jeremiah's study, without thinking my feet just started leading me down the hallway and into his office.

When I entered I looked around taking in the mess of the office that I assume Jeremiah had made. I felt guilty for all of this but if they would just see I didn't do it to hurt them they wouldn't react like this, yes I slept with another man but I only saw Jeremiah when I was with him however they wouldn't know that because at the end of the day it is my fault.

I walked further in seeing three photos scattered on Jeremiah's desk, as I got closer came into view a photo of me and Kaiden entering his house and then another of us making out at the last one of me and Kaiden naked and you know what.

Tears started to cloud my vision as I knew Jeremiah and everyone in the house had seen these. As I was lost in thought I didn't realise someone walking in until their body was pressed to the back of mine.

"So you found the pictures?" I heard Jeremiah say from behind me as I pulled back the tears that so badly wanted to fall. "Jere-" "Don't...just don't" Jeremiah interrupted me saying. "I did this for you for everyone, I asked you not to look for me but you still do! Don't you understand I'm trying to give you a life!?" I said raising my voice as I went on.

"Don't start with that bullshit everyone hear knows you only left to be with another man." He said as he pulled out the picture of me and Kaiden naked and into his hand. "You know I don't want to be here! You don't want me here and neither does anyone else! Just let me go." I said trying to hold back the tears.

"Do you not understand how broke I was when you left, I had lost one of my best friends, and my baby! And the next day you were gone along with everything that reminded me you were here" he said as his voice broke near the end, holding back the tears.

"That's exactly why I left! Everyone was tired of me, of the pain I kept giving you all. I left so you could move on!" I said as the tears clouded my vision once again. Before he could say anything else I walked into the kitchen grabbing the bottle of alcohol I once had and walked up to my bedroom, sitting on the balcony.

He looked so tired and broke, the second I saw him I just wanted to hug him and tell him everything was going to be okay, but I couldn't. I opened to bottle of the strongest alcohol in the house I could find, and poured a glass of it, drinking it quickly and refilling.

I sat there letting the tears fall as I thought of what I should do next, should I leave?, no, I couldn't that would just cause more chaos. None of them wanted me back and I understood why but I just wish they knew the real reason I left. Everyone accept Hailey and Jeremiah thought I just left of of being selfish but they didn't realise I had lost my baby.

Grayson seemed confused to why Jeremiah was so hurt and isolated but it was for the reason I left, it wasn't about me it was about our baby.

By now I had, had more than 5 little glasses of alcohol and I was definitely not good. Without thinking my dumb brain of mine decided it would be a great! Idea to go and see everyone sat downstairs. Note the sarcasm.

I got up already stumbling from my stomach but now from being drunk to add to it, Parker hadn't seen the alcohol I was taking up and I was thankful because I wouldn't have had it. The alcohol was numbing the pain I felt, numbing the insults that had been given. It just helped.

I was slowly walking down the stairs careful not to fall, as I saw Grayson, Hailey, Kenzie, Louis, Lucas, Parker, Wesley, Camila, Noah and Colton. They seemed happy, well as happy as they could be.

I walked through the kitchen still stumbling side to side, I assumed Jeremiah was in his study as he wasn't out there. I walked further out until I opened the sliding glass door knowing this encounter was not going to end well.

Noah saw me first to which he got straight up and headed over to me "Are you drunk? Go back inside." Noah said and everyone hadn't noticed that I was there but that would soon change. I pushed my finger to Noah's lips shushing him before I shoved past him.

"Well isn't this just the perfect family reunion?" I shouted sounding happy and laughing as I tried to walk over to them but stumbled back to which Noah caught me. "Maeve go back inside" Lucas said trying to hide his anger as Hailey became more protective of Kenzie, not showing me to Kenzie.

"Lucas stop being a fucking buzz kill!" I shouted to which I saw Grayson get angry at. "Watch you language!" He said to which i laughed while Noah still held me. "What are you going to do about it huh?" I said as Lucas shook his head.

"Come on Maeve let's put you to bed" Noah said trying to pull me back inside. "I said get off of me!" I shouted turning around and slapping him to which it didn't affect him as some gasped, "What the hells wrong with you!?" Hailey said getting up and taking Kenzie in, to which I saw Kenzie crying. I instantly felt bad but pushed that aside not wanting to look weak as Grayson followed Hailey in but not before sending me a death stare.

"What's gotten into you?" Colton said standing up to face me and I turned to face him. "What's gotten into me!? Maybe the fact that every time I manage to get my life back on the line you all kidnap me again! I'm so sick of it! None of you want me here, and I don't want to be here either, I left so it would benefit you all! I lost my baby to save Jeremiah and Harry lost his life to save Parker can none of you be thankful for something I've done because if I hadn't of done that Jeremiah wouldn't be alive but oh wait if I lose my baby nobody cares!" I shout not realising what I had just told Colton, Lucas, Louis, Parker, Wesley, Camila and Noah.

As I said it I instantly regretted it but that was overcome by the tears. They all looked at me in shock turning into guilt. Colton went to say something but before he could I turned around and left as I hear Noah call out my name but I ignored it.

I walked in with my head down but still trying to stand straight. Without realising I walked into a hard chest to which I tried to quickly move without them seeing me cry. "Maeve, what's wrong?" I heard Jeremiah say as I tried to move past him.

"Stop pretending like you care, and let me past" I said as he held my arms to stop me from moving. "Tell me what's wrong" Jeremiah said removing one hand to lift my chin so I faced him. "Your men that what's wrong" I said quickly removing his grip and walking upstairs without stumbling and going into my bedroom.

Jeremiah's POV:

I walked outside after Maeve went upstairs and saw everyone sat in shock, "What's going on?" I said with a bit of anger in my voice, "I'm so sorry" Louis said which made me confused, I looked over to Camila where I saw her trying to hide her tears, "What's happened?" I shouted not understanding.

"The baby, Maeve told us" Colton said showing sadness. At the mention I lost my composure for a little before I covered it up as I cleared my throat. "Well it's in the past now" I said going back to emotionless. "Jere-" Noah started but I cut him off by leaving and going into my study.

I sat down feeling my heart ache at the mention, a few minutes later I heard a knock at the door to which said come in. Lucas walked in holding a sad expression. "If your hear to speak about the b-baby feel free to leave" I said stuttering at the words. "I've known you long enough to know what your doing" Lucas said sitting in the chair across from my desk.

"And what am I doing" I said trying to get back to doing work. "Your acting like it didn't happen so that people won't speak about it" he replied. I gulped hiding the tears from my eyes. "Stop fighting your emotions Jeremiah, you need to grieve, that's the only way you'll move on" Lucas said leaning forward.

"Get our Lucas!" I shouted to him as he shook his head and left. He was right I did need to let the emotions through, but it hurt, just like when my parents and sister died. It hurt too much so I just pushed it away.

I need to speak to Maeve, we need to get through this together, the guilt is eating me up. Without another thought I got up and went upstairs to wear I knocked on Maeve's bedroom door, to which there was no reply. I walked in to see Maeve sat outside on a chair on the balcony.

As I got closer I saw that there was an empty bottle of alcohol next to her which meant that she had been drinking even though she knows she shouldn't. I walked out ready to speak to her but saw her curled up asleep.

I picked her up to take her to her bed. She snuggled into me not realising as she was sleeping and all I wanted to do was take her to my room but I knew I couldn't.

I placed her down on her bed as her eyes fluttered open. "Jeremiah?" She said but it sounded more like a statement. "Goodnight" I said turning to walk away but she grabbed onto my hand. "Stay" she said to which I turned to face her.

"Last time I did you were gone when I woke" I said thinking about when she left me. "I wasn't thinking, I thought it would be better that way" she said as her eyes watered. "Clearly, you seem to never think" I said before turning and walking out of her room and going into my room.

She broke my heart, but somehow I always end up going back to her.