Chapter 238

Chapter 238 Book 3 Chapter 73 ~WILLOW~

My lips are parted, and my hands are clutching my chest. It’s just as I had expected. He regretted everything that happened last night.

I could hardly breathe. I held onto the wall for support, but I felt like my heart couldn’t take the pain.

Nothing has ever hurt this much, not even losing my sister. Nothing should ever hurt this much but it did, I was falling apart. I only had a few seconds before I crashed.

Dante’s words had just completely shattered my heart. I turned to run away when I accidentally knocked down the vase next to me. My eyes widened; if he walked outside, he would see me. Then he would know that I’d heard him.

I didn’t want him to know. I didn’t want him to see what he’d done to me. If he did, he would try to apologize and I didn’t want his f****d apology. I ran as fast as I could, and I didn’t stop until I reached his room. I quickly shut the door behind me.

I climbed onto the bed and pretended I was asleep when I heard his footsteps. He was running; maybe he’d seen me. I still hoped that I was fast enough.

My eyes were tightly shut when the door flew open. I could hear his loud breathing and knew that he was most likely panicking.

“Willow?”

I open my eyes and see him right above me. His eyes are searching my face for answers. He was trying hard to find out if I’d heard him without asking me.

He couldn’t hide the worry from his eyes. I could see right through him.

“What’s wrong?” I ask him.

He looks around the room; I’m unsure what he’s searching for.

“Did you leave the room just now?” He asks frantically.

I quirk a brow, “leave the room?”

He nods, “were you downstairs?”

I shook my head immediately. “No. Did something happen?”

His eyes widen, “no.”

He seems to relax a little now that he believes me. It’s also possible that he’s still trying to convince himself.

I was trying my best to hold everything inside of me. It was hard. I wanted to cry and scream. I wanted to blame him for everything, but I couldn’t. He made it clear multiple times that his heart belonged to my sister. He made it clear that I would get hurt if he did what I was asking him for. Last night, I finally got what I wanted but it came with a price.

He was right all along. A part of me always hoped that Dante would learn to love me. I was wrong for dreaming of something like that.

“Are you sure you didn’t leave the room?” He asked me for the second time today.

I force a smile on my face, “I’m sure.”

He scratches the back of his neck and looks around the room nervously. “How are you feeling? Are you hurt anywhere?”

Yes. My heart is bleeding, Dante. It feels like you took a knife and stabbed me there. It feels like it’s no longer beating for you or anyone else.

“I’m okay,” I whisper as I fight back tears.

He nods, “is there anything you want to eat or drink?”

“I’m craving something.” I lie. “A book.”

He quirks a brow at me, “A book?”

I nod, “it’s something my mother always read to me when I was younger. It’s called ‘The lost girl.’ Can you get it for me?”

I wanted him to leave. I wanted an excuse to get some time for myself.

He nods, “is there anything else that you need?”

I shook my head and waited for him to leave. He looked hesitant at first, and maybe a part of him already suspects that I’d heard everything he’d said. Still, he doesn’t bother to ask me for a third time.

“I’ll be back as fast as I can.” He promises me.

The second he shuts the door behind him, everything falls apart. I’m screaming, crying, throwing up in the bathroom.

I stay on the tiled floor for a long time before walking to the bed and searching for my diary. When I found it, I grabbed the pen and started writing.

My dearest husband, Here is where our story ends. After last night, I thought things between us would finally improve. I thought I would finally have your heart. Now I know there was never a chance for that in this life. Your heart is and always has been my sister’s. I’m sorry for loving you so much. I’m sorry for making you do something that you regret. I’m sorry for everything Anya did to you. I’m sorry I could never be anything like her. I wanted to be strong; I wanted to stay for you. I wanted to make this marriage work. I can’t take the pain anymore, Dante. I can’t. My heart is bleeding, and there is nothing I can do to stop it. If you ever read this, please know that I love you more than I’ve ever loved anyone else. The happiest moments of my life were spent with you. Last night, you gave me a part of you, and I’m taking it with me for the rest of my life. I love you, and I hope that you can be happy. I know that I make everything worse for you; now that I’m no longer here, you can find your peace again.

I couldn’t stop the tears as I took the ring off my finger and placed it on the desk beside the diary.

This was the best thing I could do for him. He was not ready for marriage and may never be. I couldn’t keep forcing him to have feelings for me.

It was time for me to go.

I couldn’t say goodbye to everyone else; I knew they would call Dante or try to stop me.

I had to leave when no one was watching me.

I didn’t want to say goodbye, but I had to. I had to be strong. I needed to be strong. I had to prove that I could survive on my own.