Chapter 50

The Unwanted Bride Of Atticus Fawn Chapter 50 I couldn’t breathe. Not with the way Atticus was looking at me. His eyes looked drugged but confused at the same time. What was there to be confused about? I was his. He was mine.

How could he ask me that question? His mark was on me. I smell like him because he put that mark there. I smell like him because we’re bonded; we are one.

The person standing before me didn’t seem to know any of this, which was simply absurd. How could he not know?

I’ve been so confused by his reaction to me since I returned.

Why was he acting this weirdly? What could have possibly happened for him to be behaving like this? Did Anya do something to him while I was gone? Was I crazy for thinking that way? She was capable of doing something sneaky, and she had threatened me in the past already. That thought soon flies out of my head as Atticus’s touch becomes more desperate.

He grabs my waist and pulls my body against his while inspecting my neck. His finger is slowly rubbing the mark, making me wonder what he’s thinking. How could I stay mad at him when he was this close to my body? How could I be angry when my heart was racing because of his nearness?

He always knew what his closeness did to me; maybe he was doing it on purpose so that I couldn’t make a scene in front of everyone.

His hands were warm, and they sent tingles throughout my body. It was hard to control my need for him, even though I knew this wasn’t the time for any of that.

No. I had to find out what was going on before I let my heart flutter like this because of him. I made these same mistakes in the past; I didn’t want to do it again. I was tired of letting Atticus win these arguments because of my feelings for him.

“How can you not know the answer to that question?” I demand. “The answer is staring you straight in the eyes. Are you blind?”

He looks even more confused at my words. His grip on my waist tightens, and it seems like he’s having an inner battle with himself.

“What the hell are you doing?” Someone shrieks.

I didn’t even have to look.

I knew that voice well. Anya. She was back. Her annoying voice was all I needed to know that she was here.

Couldn’t she have stayed away a little longer? There was plenty I still wanted to ask Atticus, and I knew that with her being here, she would try her best to ensure I didn’t get the opportunity to do so. I should have moved him. I should have continued this conversation somewhere else where no one could disturb us. It was too late for that now.

It’s good that she was here. I had plenty to say to her as well.

She glared at Atticus, but when her eyes fell on me, they widened. She looked like she’d just seen a ghost. If one person were unhappy that I was back, it would be her. She doesn’t try to hide her irritation at seeing me.

“Are you surprised to see me, Anya?” I ask. “I mean, I’m supposed to be on vacation with my family. At least that’s what Atticus told me that you said to him. Can you tell me where exactly we went? I think my memory might be playing games with me.”

Atticus looks between the two of us, and I can tell that he’s completely lost.

“What’s going on?” Atticus asks.

“I should be asking you that.” Anya snaps. “Why are your arms still around her?”

He looked down at his hands still on my waist and cleared his throat before quickly letting go of me.

Why did he do it? Why did he act like touching me was wrong? I’m his wife; he can touch me without feeling guilty. Just how many things have changed around here after I’d been forcibly taken from the academy? Are there any more surprises that I need to prepare myself for?

“Did Autumn not go on vacation with her family?” He asks her. “It sounds like the both of you are arguing. You’re best friends. I’ve never seen you fight before. Did something happen between the two of you? Is there something that I should know about?”

Best friends? What world was he living in? We were far from best friends, closer to enemies, after I realized her true feelings towards me. Anya didn’t like me, and it took me too long to know the truth. I would have saved myself plenty of pain if I had recognized her dislike for me earlier.

“Of course I didn’t go on vacation with my family!” I snap. “Where have you been all this time, Atticus? How could you not realize that something was wrong?”

What other lies has she been telling him?

Anya grabs my arm and pulls me towards her, “watch what you’re saying to him. He’s not ready to hear the truth.”

Not ready to hear the truth?

Who was she to tell me what he was ready to hear?

“What’s going on here?” Damon asks as he joins us. He’s concerned about Anya; as usual, everyone is always worried about her. He doesn’t see me at first, but when he finally does, he takes a step back. His eyes are wide, like Anya’s when she first saw me. “Autumn?”

“Why is everyone so surprised to see Autumn here?” Atticus asks, looking between the two of us.

Why is he asking such a question? How much did Atticus not know? Everyone here seemed to know a lot more than he did, and it surprised me.

“Um,” Damon says as he tries to come up with a response to his question. “I’m just surprised to see Autumn here when no one informed me that she was coming, that’s all. It’s good to see you, though. I’m glad you’re here. I’m sure Clarissa will be overflowed with happiness to see you.”

Atticus looks at his brother as though he’d lost his mind.

“AUTUMN!” Clarissa gasps as she shows up right behind Damon. She’s the only one that looks happy to see me. But I wasn’t even sure if I could trust her at this point. I wasn’t sure who I could trust amongst myself anymore. They’d all let me down when I needed them the most.

She jumps forward and wraps her arms around me. “I can’t believe you’re in front of me right now. My heart feels so happy. It’s so good to see you. I’ve missed you so much.”

Had she missed me? Then why was her home empty of my belongings?

“Am I missing something here?” Atticus asks. “Since when are Autumn and Clarissa best friends?”

Clarissa freezes when she realizes that Atticus is here with us. It almost looked like they were trying to hide something from him.

She wipes the tears from her eyes, hiding them from Atticus. The more I stood there, the most confused I got. Something terrible was going on, but I couldn’t figure out what it was. Something was not right. Everyone was acting strange. But none as strangely as Atticus.

“I’ve always preferred having Autumn around over Anya.” Clarissa teases without looking directly at him. “I’m just showing her how happy I am that she’s here. There’s nothing wrong with that. If you’ll excuse me, Autumn and I have some important catching up to do.”

Clarissa wraps her arms around mine and pulls me away from Anya and Atticus. I could feel their eyes digging into my back as I was dragged away.

I wasn’t finished speaking to Atticus. I still had plenty on my mind to scream and shout at him. But I couldn’t do it earlier because he was clueless about everything.

“I know that you must be both angry and confused right now,” Clarissa whispers the moment that we’re far enough so that Atticus can’t listen to our conversation. “But there is a reasonable explanation for everything happening right now.”

Really?

I couldn’t think of anything that would be able to explain the craziness happening around me.

Atticus was acting clueless, and Anya was happy to rub it in my face that she had him back in her life. What had caused this massive change? Before I had been kidnapped, Atticus promised to be a better husband; what caused that sudden change in his behavior?

“I thought you liked me,” I tell her. “I went to your home. Every single picture of me has been removed. My clothes are gone, and everything of mine has completely disappeared. It’s like all of you tried to erase my existence when you found out that I was missing. None of you tried to find me. Do you realize how that makes me feel? Do you—”

Clarissa hugs me mid-sentence, “you have it all wrong, Autumn. Of course, we all like you; we don’t just like you; we love you like family. You are our family.”

“Is that how you treat family?” I demand. Nothing was adding up. Someone was lying to me.

“I can explain. All you have to do is listen.” She begs. “Once you hear what I say, you will understand everything.”

I decided that she at least deserved a chance to explain herself. She was always nothing but pleasant to me. Maybe I could still trust her; I just had to listen to her explanation and decide whether or not she was telling the truth.

I crossed my arms over my chest and nodded; it was my signal for her to continue. This was the only chance that she would get.

“When you got kidnapped, Atticus saw everything. He saw the men throw you into a vehicle after drugging you. He tried to stop them, but they had already driven off; he didn’t stop there; he chased the vehicle with his jeep, and that is when something horrible happened.” She begins to explain. The look on her face worries me.

Something horrible happened? The fear in my heart exploded in my chest, I think I knew where she was heading with this, but I don’t think I was ready to hear it. I was hoping that I was wrong.

“We don’t know the exact details, but Atticus got into an accident. Before it happened, he called Damon and informed him that you had been taken. He ordered him to close down all roads so that your kidnappers couldn’t escape. That’s the last anyone heard from Atticus. When we arrived at the scene, Atticus’s jeep was flipped over and smashed against a tree. You were nowhere to be found. We searched everywhere for the vehicle he described but couldn’t find it.”

I covered my mouth as I waited for her to continue.

I can’t breathe.

My heart aches so much with this new information.

An ACCIDENT?

Atticus had gotten into an accident while trying to save me. This entire time I was angry because I thought he had moved on because he believed I was gone for good. I thought he was happy that I had disappeared. I felt guilty after knowing I had been so wrong all along.

“When we pulled Atticus from the jeep, he was barely recognizable with all of the blood and bruises covering his body. I thought we had lost him. But the doctors did a great job at bringing him back. But even they couldn’t work a miracle. His body was trying to heal itself, but too much damage had already been done. When Atticus woke up, he surprised everyone when he hugged Anya. We weren’t aware of what was happening until we spoke to the main doctor assigned to him. It was the worst news that any of us were expecting.”

My heart was pounding against my chest; it was not easy finding out that the love of my life had gone through something so horrible, and I was nowhere around when it happened. I wasn’t there when he needed me the most, but it wasn’t my fault. We were both going through something awful at the exact time. But it only happened to Atticus because he was trying to save me. I was unconscious when the accident occurred; I had no idea it had even occurred until now.

An accident? Those words kept repeating in my head.

The more I thought about it, the worse I felt. How did this happen? How did his jeep flip?

“They said that his head had taken the most impact from the accident. The doctor claimed they tried their best, but this wasn’t something they could have prevented. Atticus has temporary memory loss, but the doctor also informed us that it’s possible it can even be permanent. Only time will be able to answer whether it’s temporary or not. We haven’t taken the news lightly. It’s been a rough few days, and we’ve been trying our best to cope.”

Everything made so much sense now. Atticus acted clueless because he was unaware of our marriage; he was unaware of my love for him. He was unaware of every time we’ve spent together, he didn’t have any of those memories, but I had them all.

I was the one that would suffer now that he didn’t remember me. I was the one that would miss him like crazy.

“We never wanted to remove every memory of you from his life, Autumn; I’m so sorry you had to find out like this.” She apologizes. “But when the doctor told his parents that reminding Atticus of you could cause more damage than good, they panicked. They removed everything that could remind him of you. Including all of the articles about your marriage to him. Even the articles about you being kidnapped. They worked hard to ensure that he never found out the truth. But I can assure you that everyone was still searching for you, your parents, Damon, and all of us who remembered you kept looking for you. I begged them not to hide the truth from Atticus; I knew that the moment he regained his memories, he would never forgive them for not telling him about you. I mean, he almost died trying to save you, and Atticus would want to remember the woman he risked his life for. But no one listened to me.”

My body felt numb everywhere. Not only had Atticus gotten into a horrible accident, but he also had no memory of our time together. He couldn’t remember anything about us.

I didn’t know what to do. My heart was racing, and the devastation I felt with this news had only intensified.

Clarissa pulls out her phone and points the screen at me, “this is the jeep. In case you don’t believe that I’m telling you the truth.

These are all the articles that were removed from it as well.”

I look at the pictures, one after the next. It was printed in bold that Atticus had crashed while trying to save me. Clarissa must have kept them to show me. Everyone knew the truth, but they kept it from Atticus to protect him.

I tried to stay calm, but nothing could stop my pain.

I didn’t think my heart could hurt this much. I didn’t know it was possible for anything else to cause me this much pain. Atticus got into an accident because of me. Because of me. I close my eyes as the tears slowly build up. And now his memory of us was gone. I knew I was repeating myself, but I couldn’t get past this. It was hard to accept everything that had happened while I was gone.

“Autumn?” Clarissa calls my name. I can’t hear her; I can’t listen to anything she’s saying, not when I feel like this.

I know he doesn’t remember me, but I need to be near him. We’ve been apart for too long. I couldn’t take this separation anymore. I couldn’t stand knowing the truth about everything.

“Autumn?” Clarissa calls my name once more. “Are you okay? You look pale!”

The fear in her voice is unmistakable.

Before I know it, I’m turning away from her and running in the opposite direction. I don’t know where I’m going, but there is only one person on my mind. I have to find him. I need to get close to him.

I held my breath when I spotted Atticus a short distance away. He’s in a heated argument with Anya. I know they’re in an argument because of the way they were both glaring at each other. Mostly Anya was the one glaring at him. How could she be that angry with him after the life-threatening accident he’d recently been in? I didn’t believe for one second that she was actually in love with him. I’m unsure what her intention was with Atticus, but I couldn’t let her get her way.

I don’t know what I’m doing; I can’t seem to control my feet or the rest of my body, for that matter. I’m still running towards them.

Atticus looks up and spots me racing toward him. His eyes are confused at first and then wide as he waits for the impact. He doesn’t have time to prepare as I throw myself into his arms. His hands reach out and grab my waist to steady me. My hands are on his hair first. I couldn’t stop the tears as my fingers dug into the strands, as I pulled our bodies closer together.

I know that he doesn’t remember us, but I can’t help myself. I need this. Knowing what I did now, I had to hold him at least once.

Just once, I wanted to keep him close to me.

I didn’t care what would happen next. I didn’t care that Anya was shouting my name. I didn’t care about anything but the man in my arms.

The man that risked his life for me. The man that I misjudged this entire time. My husband. My mate.

Yes. My mate. Mine.

I gasped at the sudden revelation. Why did it take me this long to realize it?

He’s been mine this entire time, yet it took me forever to realize it. It made sense why Atticus was able to mark me. It suddenly made sense why I always loved him more than anyone or anything else. The answer had been staring me straight in the face all this time.

But what did this mean about Anya? Did he reject her? How could the both of us be his mate at the same time? And why did Atticus never recognize me as his mate even after marking me? Did he know all this time?

All these questions are threatening my sanity. What did I do from here?

“Get your hands off my mate!” Anya screams behind me.

I can feel the shock radiating off Atticus’s body as I continue to hold him against me. How did I explain all of this to him?

Clarissa made it clear to me that her family did everything to make him forget about me in fear of him going into an incredible state of shock from finding out about me.

As much as I wanted to keep holding onto him, I knew I couldn’t keep it up. I knew I had to do something to get a grip on myself.

But just for a few more seconds, I wanted this. I wanted to savor every second of this hug because I had no idea how long it would be before I had my Atticus back. I had no idea what would happen after this moment.

I was terrified.

Terrified of our future together. Terrified of never getting the opportunity to have him this close to me again.