Part 58

(POV - Aria)

The rain had finally stopped.

Aria stared out the window again, her body thrumming. The clouds still weighed down on the horizon, dark and heavy, a thick fog settling over the tops of the trees where the rain had been just minutes before.

She couldn't spot the mountains anymore, their peaks hidden behind the fog blanketing the very tops of the trees. It looked almost like a painting, or a very artistic photograph. Nothing moved in the picture before her, there were no birds flitting from branch to branch or diving through the leaves together. There was no sin to cause the furthest part of the horizon to shimmer in its sweltering rays. There was just that eerie stillness that lingered after the rain, as if nature was too hesitant to start moving again in case the rain came back.

With no small amount of guilt, Aria shifted in her seat, recalling the traitorous little swoop her stomach gave when Aiden had pressed another kiss to her lips and smiled earnestly at her. He'd left to fetch them both dinner, leaving Aria as confused as ever.

A part of her had enjoyed his touch and his affection. The only issue was that she couldn't help but wonder if that part was the part of her that recognized Aiden as her true mate and wanted him to be hers. It was the part of her that had craved his acceptance, refusing to let go of that tiny bit of hope even after Aiden had shattered her heart time and time again.

It was the part of her she wasn't sure she should trust.

Her thoughts strayed to Marcus, and she wondered what he might be doing just then, while she stared out across Aiden's territory.

She wondered if he'd decided she wasn't worth the trouble anymore and moved on. Or maybe he was on his way to confront her. It surprised her when her wolf perked up at the prospect of seeing Marcus again, of having him near and possibly indulging that need for him to just hold onto her so she didn't end up floating away. It surprised her and yet, she felt like it wasn't that surprising at all. Especially since her heart beat just a little faster at the thought of seeing him again, and butterflies fluttered in her stomach.

Had any other wolf experienced this? She had been marker and mated by her true mate and yet she yearned for someone else's touch. She felt almost empty without the sound of Marcus' voice humming in her ear, deep and steady, always so calm where she had been anxious. He settled her in a way she really didn't believe Aiden could.

And she didn't know how to move on if Aiden really was serious about starting over with her. What if her feelings for Marcus never went away? What if they only grew the longer he was away? Could she break things off with Aiden after things had progressed that far?

Maybe she should just stay with Aiden. That's what was expected, and after being on the receiving end of rejection, she wasn't sure she could put Aiden through the same kind of pain that she went through. But she couldn't shake the bone deep need to have Marcus beside her again.

"You finally get what you want and yet you're still sulking," a voice mocked from the doorway. Aria turned, so consumed by her thoughts that she hadn't even heard the door click open. It was Meredith, her slim arms folded across her chest, and deep, disapproving frown marring her pretty face.

"Excuse me," Aria said, not having caught onto Meredith's words when she'd spoken to them. Meredith rolled her eyes and scoffed.

"You finally get what you want and yet you're moping like you're still not happy," she sneered.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean, Meredith?" Aria said in a deadpan. With everything going on in her own mind, she didn't have the mental capacity nor the patience to help Meredith through whatever crisis she was experiencing.

"It means that Aiden hasn't been the same wolf since you ran off with that crazy Alpha of yours," she spat. "Ever since you ran away from the pack, he's been an entirely different person. I've known him all our lives and yet I have never met this version of him. It's pathetic actually."

Aria let loose a mirthless laugh, her cheeks heating in anger.

"How is this my fault?" she snapped, rushing to her own defense. How could Meredith think that Aria had any part to play in this entire situation? Aria had been just as much a victim as Meredith, if not more. She had been the one whose heart had been torn to shreds multiple times, left to be tossed aside like trash, like she wasn't worth the bond that was already there.

But she paused, because tears had filled Meredith's eyes, and she choked back a quiet sob.

"Meredith," Aria said, her voice so much softer now, her heart hurting to see Meredith upset. She knew it was a weakness, something April had always given her grief over. She'd always been teased for having a soft heart, open even to those who were nasty to her. Meredith was no different.

"No," she murmured, her voice wobbling. "I have had years with Aiden. I've learned everything there is to know about him, how he thinks. how he reacts to things. I even know what he's going to say long before he says it. And yet... And yet I couldn't even imagine just how powerful the mating bond would be."

"No one ever really knows how strong it'll be until it happens to them," Aria supplied, feeling so small on her seat at the bay window. "I never expected it to be so... much."

"What is it like for you?" Meredith asked suddenly, catching Aria off guard with her question. She scrambled for an answer, trying to find the words that would help someone who hadn't met their true mate yet understand.

"It's like." Aria paused, chewing on her bottom lip in thought. "It's like he's still here. There's this intangible tunnel between us. Like I can feel him on the other end, and I think it's the same for him. If we tried, we might be able to communicate through it the way some other mated pairs do, but it'll take a lot of work."

"What did it feel like when he-" Meredith swallowed, licking her lips before she continued. "When he marked me?"

Aria's heart stuttered, recalling the pure agony that had torn through her body when she had laid eyes on the mark on Meredith's neck that night. And when she opened her mouth to speak, her words were barely above a whisper.

"I thought I was going to die," Aria admitted, looking down at the ground. "I thought my wolf 'had' died, she howled so loud before going completely silent. And I couldn't see anything until Marcus got to me.

"I thought I was going to die as well," Meredith said. "After you left with Marcus, Aiden became more and more distant. He pulled away from me. He refused to touch me. And after the first few days, he wouldn't even look at me. It felt like I'd disappeared."

Aria panicked. Meredith had wrapped her arms around her middle, tears running down her face.

"He went into rut just a few hours before you came back," Meredith revealed, wiping her tears with an open palm. "He was so volatile, and I'd told him I would help. We were already in his room when he caught your scent mixed with Marcus'. God, he went berserk, Aria. He almost killed his own sentries trying to get to you. He-he almost attacked me."

Aria paled, getting to her feet, and crossing the short distance between the bay window and her door where Meredith stood. She hesitantly reached out, not sure if Meredith would push her away or let Aria comfort her as best she could.

"Meredith, I know there's nothing I can say to make it right," Aria said, swallowing around the lump in her throat. "But I'm so sorry you had to get hurt as well. It isn't fair to any of us, Aiden included. And I wish there was something I could do to make it right. But I don't really know what Aiden is thinking anymore. Not that I ever knew, to be honest."

"There's nothing that anyone can say to make any of this right," Meredith sniffled, looking up to keep the tears from falling. "There's no way to make this right, because no matter who he ends up choosing, someone is going to get hurt."

Aria didn't say that she didn't think she'd be hurt if Aiden went back to Meredith. It was a sudden, simple knowledge that slid to the front of her mind, the kind of knowledge that she just accepted. The sun was warm, the sky was blue, and Aria wouldn't be hurt the same way she had been if Aiden came back and told her that he was choosing Meredith.

The knowledge was accompanied by an equally frightening fact: if Marcus never spoke to her again, she'd never be able to live.

She would be okay as long as she could still bring Marcus into her arms and run her fingers through his long curls, listen to the rumble of his chest when he growled beneath her.

That would be her undoing.

She was about to speak when an earth-shattering roar split through the silence, shaking the foundation of the floor and scaring her and Meredith speechless.