14.

The most valuable thing we have is truth.

Brotherly Bonding.

Train.

After going back to the infirmary I barely made it to  Andie's room before I fell to the floor exhausted, I wasn't really surprised by my sudden collapse, I knew it was bound to happen, dad helped me to the next room, cleaned up and I fell asleep.

I groaned moving to the side to avoid the sunlight streaming into the room, it was too early to wake up, or was it me who was just feeling lazy, so I groaned again when it seemed the sunlight was intensifying. "Mom I'm trying to sleep." I mumbled and a low chuckle rung out in the room.

"Mom is not here and you've slept half the day away, come on wake up." It was Emric who spoke adjusting the blinds and laying next to me, I immediately tangled myself with his body and sighed to the comfort. It reminded me of the days when we were young and I would have nightmares, I would cling to my brother and his scent always made me feel better, he always felt safe.

"Ah, I see you're being a baby all over again." He teased and I whined with my head on his chest. "Yes I fucking feel like being a baby right now, I'm scared." I confessed how I felt then, Emric didn't say anything, he just held me closer and rubbed my back.

"What do we do when we're scared?" He asked me like he used to when we were kids. "We hold on to the things that make us brave, we find courage where there is none, and we find bravery within others and not ourselves, because no one is ever truly alone when they're scared, there is always someone to hold your hand in the dark, your shadow never leaves you even when it's dark." I exclaimed every word and every syllable like dad taught us.

We are never truly alone, and when we're scared we should never fear the unknown but embrace it with all its opportunities. "How are you feeling?" Emric asked again as his hand rubbed my back. "Better, though this position reduces my masculinity." I whined and he scoffed. "You've been by my side our whole lives, how can this be anything other than me being here for you brother." He expressed making me feel calm and happy.

"I guess you're right, I just don't know how to face him, what don't I even say, how do I even say it, it's not like I can just dive in and hope it's not the shallow end of the pool and hopefully get no concussion." I mumbled and Emric hummed. "That is a conundrum, but remember Train, I was once in the same spot you're in, and although our circumstances are different the confession is never different, it's difficult, challenging, and terrifying." He asserted and I was baffled.

"You were afraid when you told Linden about wolves?" I question with unhinged curiosity, Emric was alpha, the bravest person I knew and I never knew him to be scared or frightened, he was sturdy and did not waver, hearing him say he was scared was a shock to me more than anything.

"I was terrified and not because of the confession directly but of losing the man I loved, even before I knew we were mates I knew we belonged together, and if he had rejected me then because the secret was out, I didn't know what I would've done, maybe it would have been different when we turned eighteen and he would be my mate, the bond would've made things easier but it would still be terrifying." My brother explained and sure enough I felt the same way.

I had no idea what I would do if I lost my starfish, he understood me, loved me, and cared about me, he was there when I needed loving the right way, he was perfect for me, and my confession to being a wolf would have it going down the drain and I was terrified.

The prospect of him not wanting me was on the cards, who would want a man with a second animalistic soul within them, not everyone was like Linden and not everyone could be like him, he was just like mom or dad, he understood even without saying a lot, he saw past the fur, would my own mate do that, I wanted so badly for a rogue attack to happen so I would shift and fight for my mate then he wouldn't be scared of me.

I snorted to the thought, if only. "You're thinking too hard, and you're frown line in showing." Emric remarked poking my forehead where my supposed frown line was, it would show whenever I was racking my brain for answers or how to deal with a problem that had no right way of solving.

"I'm thinking about him, I went on a rampage Emric, I let my wolf lose control and did all that—." I couldn't say it even now, I knew what I was doing but my anger and fury clouded everything plus with no control over my wolf it was more so my fault,  if I had only stayed inside beside my mate maybe it wouldn't have happened.

"They deserved it Train so don't you dare feel guilty about it, he could've died Train, and they would've acted like it was nothing and probably covered it up so no one would know about it, we got there in time to make sure it didn't happen, but for your wolf, it was blood for blood, I'm sure as hell if my own unwanted mother inlaw had done something to mama munchie I would've rampaged." He asserted proudly speaking of his mate and justifying my actions.

I sighed with slight amusement thinking of Linden's pet name that had slipped from Emric, mama munchie indeed. Though I was having trouble believing what I did was right I wouldn't voice it out as I only needed Andie to tell me it was okay that I did it, and that he wouldn't hate me for it.

I had now two things to worry about, telling him that I was a wolf and the fact that I had ripped his parents apart and left only enough to make sure they didn't die, the ST Maine police department would claim it was a rabid wolf that attacked them that was obvious but if I were to tell my mate then he would know I did it.

No matter how much I fumbled with words I couldn't find the right ones to actually convey how I felt, did I need to start with an apology, or did I dive right in and wait for him to respond with shock and then understanding, my mind was on a tailspin and I didn't know if I could do it.

"What do I say, how do I say it?" I asked Emric and he chuckled deeply as his voice was now deep and yet surprisingly soothing. "Hey stop laughing,  I'm serious." I whined punching his eight pack which more or less looked like ten, and he obviously didn't feel it. "Fine, fine I'm sorry." He calmed down laying on the bed with my head on his chest,  it was amusing how both of us had fit on it.

"Train, you don't need some perfectly crafted speech to talk to him, you just need to say whatever you feel, a crafted speech is like a meticulous lie, you're not saying the truth you're just saying the words hoping they convey what you want the other person to believe but in hindsight that's not how you truly feel at all." He stated sternly with his all wise eyes looking at me and a smile on his lips.

"Linden is rubbing off you isn't he, Mr wise alpha." I teased and he scoffed with a proud stare. "If he doesn't rub me off who will, he is my mate." He replied with a smirk and I facepalmed making him laugh again. "Not like that!" I yelled as we both burst out laughing, it made me feel better, but Em was right I need to just dive in and hopefully not at the shallow end.

"I'm gonna take that advice to heart." I conceded and he smiled. "I know you will." He mumbled as we lay on the bed, I didn't know how he was going to react but I was prepared to beg him if need be, I couldn't lose him.

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I love writing these brother moments a lot, hope you enjoy them too.

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