Twisted Emotions: Chapter 10

NINO

Kiara kept throwing poorly veiled glances my way as we walked into our gaming room. Remo was already there doing some recreational kicks against the punching bag. He paused when we stepped in, his gaze narrowing on Kiara briefly before starting to kick again. “I’m starving. Let’s order pizza.”

Upon seeing Remo, Kiara had stiffened beside me and her breathing turned erratic. I wasn’t sure if it was because he was only in his fight shorts or because he was beating the shit out of an inanimate object, but her fear of him was obvious. I snatched the delivery menu to one of our favorite pizza places from the bar. It was stuck to something that had spilled. I turned to her. “You will have to get used to Remo’s presence.”

She jumped, tearing her eyes away from my brother. “I don’t know if I can. I heard what he does, what he likes doing,” she whispered.

I regarded my brother, who watched us from across the room as he landed another kick against the punching bag. Remo did a lot of things, which were unsettling to someone like Kiara, and he enjoyed them all. “He isn’t a danger to you.”

She raised her eyes to mine, shivering, goose bumps rising along her smooth skin. “Are you sure?”

“Yes.” There was no hesitation in the word. I knew with absolute certainty that Remo wouldn’t lay a hand on Kiara because she was mine.

She nodded slowly, her eyes filled with unease. She was reluctant to believe me. She didn’t know Remo like I did. Very few people in this world were safe around my brother, there was no denying it, but the same could be said for me.

“Why don’t you take a look at the menu and see what kind of pizza you want?” I held it out to her.

She took it from me, eyeing it warily. The stained paper looked like it had seen better days.

I made my way over to my brother, who stopped kicking and raised his eyebrows at me. “That look means I won’t like what you have to say.”

“You scare her.”

Remo gave me an amused smirk. There were very few people who weren’t terrified of my brother.

“I’d appreciate it if you try not to scare her quite so much.”

Remo chuckled, ramming his knee into the bag a few more times before he said, “I didn’t do anything.”

“I know,” I said. “We don’t do well with sensitive women, but Kiara lives under our roof now. She is part of our family, and we should make sure she feels as comfortable as possible given her past and our disposition.”

He tilted his head. “You want us to treat her well?” I followed his gaze toward Kiara, who was assessing the bar area, which was piled with dirty glasses, beer bottles, and plates. The cleaning people were coming in the morning.

“Yes. I want her to be treated like family. I want her protected. I want her safe from any threat. She is a Falcone now. She is mine.”

Remo nodded, not taking his eyes off my wife. She placed the menu down on the bar then glanced up and noticed our gazes. She blinked, stiffening, and then swallowed, quickly picked up the menu again, and fumbled nervously with it. Fear.

“She is safe, Nino.” Remo turned to face me, gripping my forearm. “You are my brother and she is yours. I will make sure everyone in this city, and beyond, realizes she’s under our protection.”

Remo didn’t have many redeeming qualities, much like me, but one of them was his loyalty. If he decided someone fell under his protection, he would stop at nothing to make sure that person was safe.

He let go of my forearm. “And? Have you finally fucked her?

I rolled my eyes at him. “No. And I won’t until she wants me to. She is too scared because of the rape.”

Remo’s eyes moved back to Kiara. She was still staring intently at the menu. She must have memorized every pizza they offered by now.

“Kiara isn’t capable of protecting herself. We need to make sure she is safe wherever she is,” I said.

“I don’t want our soldiers in the mansion. This is our home.”

“I agree. That’s why you or Savio, or even Adamo, should guard her when I’m not around to do it.”

Remo smirked. “Are you sure Kiara wants me to guard her? She might die from fear if I’m alone with her.”

“She will get used to you.”

“I doubt it,” Remo said with a grin.

“It won’t be easy, but eventually she’ll come around if you don’t lose your shit around her.”

“I’ll do my best.”

We both knew what that meant. I returned to Kiara’s side. She was biting her lip, and her body was tense. “So did you find a pizza you want?”

“I’m not very hungry,” she said softly. “Is it okay if I only order a salad with mozzarella and olives?”

“You can eat whatever you like. And if you’re still hungry, you can have a piece of one of our pizzas,” I told her.

She smiled. “Okay. Thanks.”

Remo stalked toward us and stopped beside me and Kiara.

“Ready to order?” he asked.

“I will place the order. Will Fabiano be coming over?”

“Yes. Leona spends the evenings with her crack-whore of a mother.”

Kiara’s eyes widened. I wasn’t sure if it was the insult or because another man was joining us tonight.

I picked up my phone and gave our favorite Italian restaurant a ring. Their pizzas were the best in town. We all got our usual orders, so the addition of a salad caused a bit of a stunned silence on the other end.

“Why don’t you sit down? You can turn on the TV if you want. The food will be here in thirty minutes,” I told Kiara, who stood frozen beside Remo and me.

She nodded and moved to the sofa where she sank down in the middle.

“I hope she loses that submissive behavior soon. It’s fucking annoying,” Remo muttered.

“This is new for her. She wasn’t as tense when I was alone with her.”

Five minutes later, Fabiano sauntered in. He had a spare key and never bothered ringing the bell. “I need a scotch,” was the first thing out of his mouth. “Leona’s mother is a fucking nightmare. That woman smokes and shoots up more crystal than most people and manages to survive.”

“That’s because you offer her a free supply. Her tolerance to the substance grows,” I explained.

Fabiano glared. “I know. But if I don’t give it to her, the stupid whore will hit the streets again, and it fucking kills Leona to see her mother sucking ugly dicks.”

Kiara sucked in a soft breath on the sofa, and we all turned to her. She flushed. Fabiano reached over the bar counter and grabbed a bottle of scotch from the shelf then poured himself a generous glass. “Anyone else?”

“I’ll have one,” Savio said as he walked in, clapping Fabiano’s shoulder. “I hear you’re being pussy-whipped.”

Fabiano shoved him. “I can still wipe the floor with your ugly face, Savio, don’t forget that.”

Savio smiled cockily. “Not much longer. I’m a fucking natural when it comes to fighting.”

I opened the fridge under the bar and took two bottles of beer out, one for Remo and one for me, then glanced over at Kiara, who was focused on the TV. The local news was reporting about a fire that had burned down one of our soldier’s restaurants.

“Turn that off,” Savio shouted. “The fucking news grates on my nerves. They always get it wrong. “

Kiara jumped and quickly turned the TV off. “Mind your tone,” I said to Savio, who raised his eyebrows at me. I turned to Kiara. “What would you like to drink?”

Her eyes darted from me to my brothers and then Fabiano. “Something non-alcoholic, please.”

“Alcohol adds to the fun,” Savio said with a grin.

Kiara flinched. Adamo skidded down the stairs in that moment. “Get Kiara one of your Cokes from the kitchen,” I ordered.

He groaned but turned on his heel and went off. The pizza arrived shortly after. Fabiano and I carried it over to where Kiara sat and spread the boxes out on the wide table. I sat down beside her, and Remo took up her other side; it was his usual spot. Kiara’s shoulder stiffened, but she didn’t react any other way. I handed her the salad. “That’s yours.”

“I really don’t get why girls always eat salad. It annoys the fuck out of me,” Savio said as he grabbed a piece of his pizza.

Adamo threw himself down on the sofa between Fabiano and Savio, causing them to scowl at him. He handed a bottle of Coke to Kiara. She who took it, mumbling a thanks, and poured herself a glass.

“What’s on?” Adamo asked between bites.

“We tested a race in Kansas. It was a huge success,” Remo said eagerly, turning on the TV and opening the recording of the illegal street race.

“Cool,” Adamo said, eyes keen when the camera zoomed in on the line of cars.

Kiara ate quietly among us. If I closed my eyes, I wouldn’t have even known she was there at all, except when I got the whiff of her flowery perfume. It was obvious that she was uncomfortable surrounded by so many men, and the alcohol seemed to bother her additionally. She’d have to get used to it. This was how it always was in our home.

“Maybe we can convince Vitiello to extend the races into his territory,” Savio suggested.

“I don’t think Luca wants to cooperate with us any longer than he has to. We all know that this truce won’t last forever. Then all bets are off.”

Kiara shifted. I inclined my head toward her, but she was focused on the salad.

Fabiano cocked an eyebrow at me as if I knew what was going on in her head.

“It would do Luca good to remember that he’s lucky having us on his side,” Remo said, reaching for a piece of my pizza; we usually all shared pizzas. He leaned over Kiara’s legs to reach the box, brushing up against her leg. She gasped, jerked back, and dropped her salad. Pressed up against the backrest, chest heaving, she regarded Remo as if he was going to jump her. His eyes narrowed, and I knew this wasn’t going to go over well. “What the fuck is wrong with you, woman?” he growled. “I was going to grab a fucking piece of pizza, not grope you. I have no intention of fucking you, not now, not ever. For one, there’s no fun in breaking someone broken, and secondly you are Nino’s, so he’s the only one who’s going to get your pussy. Nobody else is going to touch you like that, got it?”

Tears welled in Kiara’s eyes.

“Oh fuck,” Savio muttered.

“Remo,” I said in a warning voice.

He scowled, grabbed the piece he’d wanted in the first place, and leaned back. “Shut up, Nino. I’m fucking sick of her flinching. It’s fucking annoying, especially because I didn’t even give her reason to flinch. This is my home, and I’m not going to walk on eggshells because she can’t get a grip on herself.”

Kiara swallowed audibly and picked up the few pieces of lettuce she had dropped on her jeans with shaking fingers. Then she rose slowly. “Do you have a mop so I can clean this?” she asked quietly.

“Leave it. The cleaning people are coming tomorrow.”

“I don’t want them to find cheese and salad on the floor,” she said.

“Trust me, they’ve seen much worse on these floors,” Fabiano said.

She gave a jerky nod. “I’ll go clean up and then go to bed.” She pressed herself past my legs. To my confusion, she didn’t move toward the guest bathroom, instead she walked toward the French windows and slipped outside into the gardens.

“Why’s she going outside?”

Fabiano shook his head. “For fuck’s sake, she’s going outside because she’s going to cry in peace.”

I regarded him, and he narrowed his eyes. “You are a fucking genius, but you’re still a stupid asshole when it comes to women.”

“You should probably go after her,” Adamo suggested.

I frowned. “If she wants to cry in peace, she probably doesn’t want my company.”

“Women,” Remo muttered, shoving another piece of pizza into his mouth.

“Listen to the kid,” Fabiano said. “Go to her and console her or whatever it is you are capable of doing.”

“I’ve never consoled a woman.”

Fabiano sighed. “Then improvise, simulate emotions or whatever. I don’t give a fuck.”

“Since you are the one who has a girlfriend and who has experience dealing with female emotions, it seems logical that you should go outside and console her.”

Fabiano snorted. “I knew this marriage was a fucking bad idea.” He leaned back. “I’m not the one she wants to see, trust me. She’ll probably scream bloody murder if I go after her in the dark. You are her husband so act like one.”

I stood.

“Good luck,” Savio said, stifling his laughter.

It didn’t take me long to find Kiara. She was perched on a sun chair. The bluish glow of the pool highlighted her face, and I could see tears running down her cheeks. She quickly ran the back of her hand over her skin, but it was too late. I sat down beside her, ignoring her body tensing. “I’m sorry for ruining your dinner.”

“You didn’t ruin anything. We’ve had far worse incidents, and most of them involved broken bones, so this is nothing.”

I reached for her and brushed another tear away. She became very still and stopped breathing. I grabbed her shoulders and brought our faces closer. She sucked in a breath, but I needed to get through to her. “If something bothers you, say it. If you don’t want Remo to trample all over you, you will have to stand up to him. I can protect you, but it won’t bring you the respect of my brothers. If you want to be a part of this family, you need to gain their respect. Being submissive and shying away like that doesn’t cut it, okay?”

She averted her eyes.

“No,” I ordered.

Her gaze flew back to meet mine. I tightened my hold on her shoulders, and she winced.

“I’m not sure if I can do it. My fear is too strong.”

“Your fear is useless. It cripples you. Don’t let it.”

She narrowed her eyes. “It’s not that easy.”

“It’s not as hard as you make it out to be either. It’s your choice to face your fears or to let them rule over you.”

“Let me go,” she said with a shaky.

I nodded and released my hold on her shoulders. “That’s a start.”

Standing up, I held my hand out to her. “Now come. We’ll return. You can have pizza.”

She hesitated but then she took my hand and straightened. Her pulse was still racing under my thumb, but she looked less shaky. “I can’t eat your pizza.”

“We always share our pizzas. Nobody will mind.”

“I’m vegetarian. Your pizzas all have some kind of meat on them,” she said.

I hadn’t noticed that she hadn’t eaten meat at the wedding. “Next time we’ll order a vegetarian pizza for you.”

She became tense as we stepped back into the gaming room, and her skin reddened in embarrassment. I led her back to the sofas and sat down beside Remo so Kiara didn’t have to. Remo pretended he didn’t notice and kept watching the race on the screen. Kiara squeezed my hand briefly before she released me and took a gulp from her Coke.

Fabiano gave me a look that probably conveyed recognition, though I wasn’t sure why. Nobody mentioned Kiara’s exit or her puffy eyes, and eventually she became more relaxed and watched the race with us.

Her eyes started drooping but she didn’t get up; she probably wasn’t sure if she was allowed to leave. I decided to make it easy for her. “Let’s go to bed,” I suggested and stood.

That was obviously the wrong thing to say because the tension in her body returned full force. I sent Fabiano a questioning look. After all, he was the woman whisperer. He only shrugged.

“Good night,” Kiara said before she followed me silently into our wing. I tried to figure out the reason for her tension. I thought I was doing her a favor when I suggested we go to bed. I wasn’t even tired.

When we arrived in our bedroom and her gaze lingered on the bed, she swallowed thickly and it dawned on me. “Are you worried because you think I want sex?”

She bit her lip. “I’m a horrible wife.”

“I’m not a good husband either. It is what it is.” I pointed at the bed. “As I said before, you don’t have to fear me. I won’t touch you unless you desire it. We discussed this. I assumed you understood that our bedroom doesn’t pose a threat to you.”

“I guess it’s difficult to believe,” she said.

“I keep my word.”

I wasn’t sure if it finally sank in or if it needed more time. When I joined her in bed later, she had her back turned to me and was half hidden beneath the covers. I couldn’t see if she had tensed but her breathing definitely changed. I waited for her to fall asleep before I got up. This was going to be one of those nights where I wouldn’t get any sleep. With a last glance at my sleeping wife, I walked out into the corridor. I was never going to be a good husband; my disposition would always prevent that.

KIARA

When I woke, it took me several moments to realize where I was. Once I did, my pulse quickened. I sat up, looking around. Nino was gone, and I didn’t hear any sounds coming from the bathroom either. I got out of bed and headed into the bathroom. As I’d noticed yesterday, there wasn’t a lock on the door. It was a bit unsettling since Nino could walk in at any point. For that very reason, I hurried through my shower and quickly got dressed in a maxi dress with a high neckline. Even if I preferred to keep most of my body covered, it was too warm outside to wear something long sleeved. My eyes were drawn to the window behind the Jacuzzi tub and the blue sky outside. From the looks of it, it was going to be another hot day in Las Vegas. The sprinklers in the gardens were spewing water. I supposed there was no other way to keep the grass this beautifully green.

After that, I busied myself by putting away my clothes into the drawers that Nino must have cleared for me in the walk-in closet. When I was done, I hesitated, not sure how to proceed. I was hungry and I couldn’t very well stay in the bedroom all day, but the mansion didn’t feel like home yet. I wasn’t sure if it ever would, so walking around on my own felt like I was intruding.

Eventually, my hunger drove me outside. It was quiet in this part of the house, which wasn’t surprising considering its size. Nino was probably in the main wing with his brothers. I wasn’t really sad that he didn’t wake me when he left the bedroom this morning. I was used to being alone most of the time and preferred solitude over the company of people.

I moved downstairs into the smaller living area in Nino’s wing and froze on the last step. There, beside the French windows, stood a beautiful Steinway D piano. I couldn’t do anything but stare. I took the last step down then approached the instrument almost fearfully. How did Nino manage to get it over here so quickly? But this was Las Vegas and he was a Falcone, so he probably had his ways. The more important question was why did he buy this for me?

Of course I told him I loved to play, but it wasn’t as if he needed to put in an effort to win me over. We were already married, and I was bound to him forever. If anyone was required to please someone, then it was me as the wife. And so far, I’d failed miserably.

I sank down on the black leather bench, letting my fingers glide reverently over the smooth black and white keys, and then I began to play, but to my surprise it wasn’t the song I’d been working on these past few months. It was something new entirely, a melody I hadn’t even known was in me, but as my fingers moved over the keys, it took shape. Slowly, the knot around my chest loosened, and I realized the notes were my emotions shaped into music.

The sound was haunted and frightful, the notes chasing each other, quick and erratic then slowing almost abruptly. Tumult and fear, resignation and defiance, and beneath it all an underlying pain I could not shake.

I couldn’t stop playing, even as I began the melody anew, reformed it, but the emotion remained, and it filled the room and me. For a moment, I felt at home, felt almost at peace.

“I see you discovered your piano,” Nino drawled, and my fingers dug into the keys, making the beautiful instrument cry out almost angrily.