22 | tell me to stop

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CHAPTER 22

I recommend reading this with music on to set the mood hehe

You can find the playlist for this book on my spotify: @silhouxette

"You seemed off this morning. He said, crossing his arms over his chest. "What's wrong?"

"Oh... um, nothing. I just felt a bit ill." I lied.

He cocked his head to the side slightly, letting his eyes travel over my face. "You don't look ill."

I scrambled for something to say that would get me out of the hole I had just dug myself into, but he spoke again before I could even think about it properly, a deep sigh lacing his voice. "It doesn't matter."

I felt guilty for lying to him, but anything was better than admitting to the fact that I left because of the irrational jealousy that flooded through me when I saw that girl kissing his cheek.

I forgot about it when his facial expression changed, mischief breathing itself into his eyes and that dimpled mouth. "Sing for me again. Or should I say howl for me again? That's probably a better word for it."

I had no control over the way my own mouth dropped open. I was no Beyoncé, but you'd assume based on the amount of music I listened to that I'd at least be able to hold a tune. "I wasn't that bad!" I defended.

His lips twitched at the corners as they fought a smile. "Sure."

"Shut up." I said, smiling to myself and walking over to the counter to turn off the music that had been underscoring our conversation. "And I'm almost positive you aren't any better."

"Wanna bet?" He teased, eyes sparkling when they met mine. "Put a song on."

"What if you don't know it?" I asked.

His jaw set determinedly. "I doubt that. Put one on, gorgeous."

I clicked the 'shuffle play' button on the home screen of my phone and listened as the first few notes of a song traveled into the air and latched onto the particles, resonating around the room.

"A tornado flew around my room before you came..."

You've got to be kidding me.

Of all the songs that could have played, it was the first and only one that he had ever recommended to me. Great.

A small smirk graced his lips as he sang, and I could tell that the same thing was going through his head.

The husky tone of his voice contrasted the lightness of Frank Ocean's in the best possible way, and I rolled my eyes internally. Of course he was a good singer. Life was just unfair like that.

I couldn't take it anymore, letting my finger pause the song. "Okay fine. You win."

I raised my head from my phone to look back at him, noticing the boyish grin that had fallen onto his face. "Did you add that to your playlist because I told you about it?"

My face heated a little and I shrugged. Yeah. It's a good song."

"Admit it. You're obsessed with me." He said, eyes finding mine and piercing through me. Humour filtered into his voice as he said it, but there was something else there too. Darker. More serious.

"No." I said, sticking my tongue out at him childishly.

"Really mature." He commented, raising his eyebrows in amusement.

That cocky grin that he had worn countless times in front of me made an appearance on his face. "And we can't have it all. I just happen to get pretty close to it."

"Everything except modesty, huh?" I teased, laughing as we stared at each other.

I cleared my throat, the heated silence that filled the air making me slightly uncomfortable. "Did you need something else?"

Something changed in his face as I waited for his answer. His eyes, usually calm and sea like, were now burning me up from the inside.

That felt fitting somehow. It was like a fire that you knew you should look away from, but couldn't bring yourself to no matter how hard you tried.

It was common knowledge that Gabriel was handsome. I knew it from the very first time I saw him, sitting on the steps of that hall and watching with me an intensity that I was still yet to forget.

Regardless, I could easily say that I had never found him as attractive as I did in this moment.

Shadows flitted across his face in a way that left him looking different to any of the other times that I'd seen him.

Darker.

More intense.

He stepped closer, eliminating the space between us that was already practically nonexistent.

I watched dark eyelashes sweep over the pale skin of his face as he blinked, jaw setting determinedly once his gaze returned to mine. "I need you to be honest with me."

My will had disappeared at some point during his transformation from 'guy next door' into 'guy your parents warned to stay away from', and I found myself nodding.

"Why did you leave this morning? I know it wasn't because you felt ill." He said.

I brought my lips between my teeth as I considered my answer. "Um..."

His face hardened as if he could hear the thoughts in my head that were screaming "Deny! Deny! Deny!"

Everything about him was daring me to lie and see what happened.

"Is it because you saw me with Jenny?" He asked, the hesitancy in his voice a stark contrast to the intensity of his gaze. Almost as if he was scared that I would take off running.

If that was the case then he wasn't actually too far off. The urge to flee was growing stronger every second and I glanced behind me, subconsciously planning an escape route.

I was met with the hard granite of the counter, remembering with a start that I had basically backed myself up against it when I went to turn off the music.

There was nowhere for me to run to, so I turned my head back to face Gabriel.

"The girl you were with had nothing to do with it. I just felt like I should go." I answered, the steady voice that came out of me a surprise.

I was lying through my teeth and I knew it. Seeing him with Jenny had bothered me far more than it should've, I just couldn't let him know that.

My mouth had clearly detached itself from my the rest of my body, which was a jittery mess. My heart was pumping blood through me so quickly that I could feel each and every beat.

Why did he never fail to get this kind of reaction out of me?

His voice dropped an octave lower as he leaned forward slightly. "Do you not get tired?"

I swallowed nervously. "Of what?"

"Lying to me." He answered, eyes boring into mine as he watched for my reaction.

"What makes you think I'm lying?" I asked with a frown. I knew somewhere in the back of mind that my question was completely irrational since I actually was, but clearly all sane thoughts had left my head.

"You wanna know how I know?" He replied, a smirk pulling at his lips when I nodded in response.

"Cause I would've done the same thing." He finished. I let out a small gasp at his words, trying to figure out what he was telling me.

Suddenly it became impossible to ignore our proximity. I could feel the cold stone of the counter pressing into my back, but it was the look in Gabriel's eyes that had me shivering.

Goosebumps raised themselves across the soft skin of my arms as the sound of his breathing filled the room.

I found my own lungs pumping faster, the breaths I released desperate to join with his.

I guessed that the look on my face mirrored the one on his because he began to lean in slowly.

"Cora." He called, eyes caressing my face in a way that I so badly wanted for his fingers to instead. "Tell me to stop."

I gulped, the words frozen on the tip of my tongue.

"Cora, tell me now." He repeated, growing more agitated as his gaze moved down to my mouth.

"I can't." I said honestly, shoulders dropping in defeat.

That was the only confirmation he needed before he crashed his lips to mine and I started to fall.

Slowly at first before it became a plummet, dizzying and intense - the kind of fall that set the whole world spinning and swaying around me.

The only constant, the only thing that wasn't rotating at a million miles an hour, was Gabriel.

The feeling of his hard chest under my fingertips grounded me, reminding me that the fall wasn't physical, just a product of my foggy mind.

With no tongue and soft lips, we were kissing in a way that could've been described as innocent if it wasn't for the passion with which we did it.

The tension that had been building ever since we met each other was finally being released, and neither of us held back.

Heat spread through every single part of my body until even the tips of my fingers were tingling, and I had to do something with them.

Before I could even think about it they were buried in the curls that crowned his head, forcing us even closer together.

And then it happened.

His tongue entered my mouth, that light that I had only seen when he smiled pouring into me with every stroke.

And I knew he felt it too, that shift. Because he pulled away from me for a split second and just stared.

A small smile fell across his face and he whispered. "You don't know how long I've been waiting for this."

And then he was back, all soft lips and hot breaths, and I wasn't falling anymore.

I was flying now, so high above the clouds that I didn't think I'd ever want to come back down.

The craziest thing is that I wasn't scared because I knew he'd be there to catch me, and I was beginning to think that's all I really needed.

Although I only had two others to compare it to, I knew that this was exactly how a kiss should feel.

Dizzying. Passionate. Sweet.

So good that it set the world spinning on its axis.

We both panted as we came up for air, cheeks brushing against each other and begging us not to pull apart.

As I stared at him, noticing how his lips had swollen because of mine and his pale skin had flushed slightly, I was overcome by an urge I had never had before.

I wanted... more.

More kisses and frantic touches.

More of him looking at me the way he was now.

When did that happen?

There's no way that I hadn't just imagined this moment.

That the way Cora was staring at me now, the desire I saw in her eyes, wasn't just part of a really good freakin' dream.

It wouldn't be the first time.

I took a good look at her, watching her breathing slowly return to normal and admiring the blush that had spread across her cheeks.

My hand reached for hers of its own accord and when they met, I was reminded that everything that had happened was completely real.

Bloody hell. I just kissed Cora.

And I mean properly kissed, not the annoying 'almost there' thing we did in that art studio.

My eyes returned to their favourite spot on her face and stayed there. Watching. Waiting.

She looked flustered, and I was relieved to know that it had the kiss had the same effect on her as it did on me.

Her lips parted slightly and my brain conjured up the memory of what they had felt like against mine.

Candyfloss didn't do her justice anymore. She tasted like every single sweet thing I had ever eaten in my life, combined.

I could already tell that it would be impossible to resist based on the way that I was eyeing up those lips right now, far too similar to how an addict looked at their next fix.

My thoughts were interrupted when I noticed her face fall in my peripheral vision.

"What did we just do?" She whispered with her hands on her cheeks, voice carrying with the air around us.

What we should have done a long time ago.

I had to stop her from getting into her head and overthinking everything. I'd stood by and watched as she did it last time, and I'd be damned if I was letting it happen again.

"Cora." I called, hoping the look in my eyes was communicating how I felt.

"Yeah?" She replied, taking her bottom lip between her teeth and nibbling on it. I had noticed her doing that a lot now, so I guessed that it was some kind of nervous habit.

I just had to show her that she had nothing to be nervous about.

"Did you like it?" I asked, watching her big brown eyes absorb my words. "The kiss." I added, before she pretended that she had no idea what I meant.

The expression that she had been wearing before returned almost instantly. Her pupils had darkened to a shade that looked almost black in this lighting, and I couldn't look away.

She nodded slowly, the fire in those eyes spreading to the rest of her face as she stared at me.

I rejoiced internally, letting my thumb make a featherlight trail across her cheek. "Then just let it happen."

Her body responded in place of words, a trail of goosebumps raising wherever I touched.

My hand covered the nape of her neck and brought her face to mine, allowing me to revel in the feeling of her smooth skin under my rough palm.

For someone who was usually so guarded and hesitant, each kiss brought out a different side of Cora.

And as our lips met for the second time and she melted against me, I marvelled at how she was this time around.

Soft. Open. Inviting.

The same mantra that her mouth sang as it moved against mine, slipping me just a little further into that addiction.

I was done for. There was no coming back from this. If Cora decided that she still wanted to stay as friends, I wouldn't be able to do it.

Not after experiencing everything that I'd be missing out on.

The kiss was short and sweet, her mouth innocent and shy in the way it explored mine. I couldn't stop myself from reflecting on how perfect she was for me. I just wished I could get her to see it.

I reluctantly pulled away from her to be met with the look that I knew was written all over my own face.

It was one that screamed "Don't stop," and ignoring it was one of the most painful things I'd ever had to do. But she wasn't ready for that yet.

So I changed the subject, a mischievous smile flitting across my face. "I told you we'd end up as kissing friends."

I couldn't help the way my smile grew as her laughter filled the air, the hand that had been resting on my chest reaching out to hit my shoulder.

"Don't get used to it." She said, rolling her eyes playfully and turning away from me as she did it.

I knew she was joking, but there was a part of me that felt the need to prove her wrong anyway. "What if I want to get used to it?" I said with raised eyebrows, arm reaching out to grab hers before she could turn away from me fully.

The only response she gave me was non-verbal, the sound of her breathing growing a little louder.

I repressed a smile at the knowledge that I had that effect on her.

Not that asshole from the cafe or any other guys she had been with. Me.

To stop myself from wearing the wide grin that was threatening to appear on my face and having to answer when she asked what had gotten me smiling, I spoke first. "You started packing yet?"

Confusion washed over her face and I put her out of her misery by reminding her. "We're leaving for Cornwall in a couple of days."

"Don't tell me you've forgotten?" I asked with mock outrage, resisting the urge to laugh.

Her eyes flashed with horror and I could tell that she had definitely forgotten, but she played it off with "No, of course not. I've almost finished packing."

I nodded, lips curving up at the corners. "Sure you have."

Her lips parted - probably to defend herself some more - but I leaned in and kissed her before she could say anything else, letting out a low groan when her body moulded against mine.

I could say that it was because I didn't want her to start arguing with me again, but that wasn't it. I actually found the way her eyes blazed whenever she was mad at me really hot. The only reason I had kissed her was because I wanted to.

When her eyelids fluttered open and she gave me what I could only describe as a dazed smile, I reluctantly began to make my way over to the door. I needed to leave now, or I wouldn't be able to stop.

"Where are you going, stalker?" She called after me, voice lighter than I'd ever heard it before.

I turned around against my better judgement, breaking into laughter. "First I'm a robber, and now I'm a stalker. You wound me, gorgeous."

Her dimples bid me goodbye as I crossed the distance to the door, pausing for a second before I turned the knob. "Bye, Cora. And remember to lock this next time."

I didn't get a response so I glanced behind me again, giving up on my attempts not to do exactly that.

Something in my heart ached as I watched her trail her lips with her thumb, the small smile she gave me her own little sign that she was coming around.

Slowly. But it was happening.

That brick wall had lost most of its foundation now. The question was, what would happen when it all came crumbling down?

This chapter is dedicated to everybody who has read this far and managed to cope through the slow burn hehe

I feel like - especially in slow burn books - there's so much pressure to make their first kiss absolutely amazing and I definitely felt it as I wrote this chapter. You wouldn't believe me if I told you how many times I restarted it.

But I really hope it lived up to your expectations. Please tell me if it did because I worked so hard on it <3

Also, if you've been following along with the story closely then you've definitely realised by now how big of a part music plays in Gabe and Cora's day to day lives. I'm obsessed with it so naturally, they also are.

I would recommend listening to each chapter with their playlist in the background because it makes it SO much easier to get into their heads.

https://open.spotify.com/user/31n5if6t272ahfnlw7njirpxrsxe/playlist/7bBYeFad3vWPzanznLYpf3?si=Q2Vo7NDLST-kpdYBFocUxQ

Anyway, sorry for this really long author's note, I'm just super proud of this chapter. I don't know if you guys noticed this but during their 'almost kiss' the descriptions were more physical because that's how they saw each other at the time. Neither of them was truly ready to be kissed by the other.

In this chapter though, I focused on the more emotional aspect of it because they've gotten close enough to each other to think about how the kiss feels internally as well as externally.

Have a good day/night and thank you for reading <3