The Dixon Rule: Chapter 6
The Dixon Rule (Campus Diaries, 2)
âAND THEN WE GOT TO SEND ACTUAL MESSAGES TO THE ACTUAL astronauts in the International Space Station! Can you believe it! And tomorrow we get to see their responses. Can you believe that!â
If she werenât ten years old, I would question whether Maryanne snorted a pound of cocaine before I got here. Sheâs pacing the living room, talking a mile a minute, wearing a look that can only be described as euphoric.
Sadly, all this ecstasy is a result not of coke but space camp.
âFirstly, I need you to chill,â I advise her. âYouâre making me dizzy. Secondly, what was your message?â
She offers a broad smile. âI asked whether farts smell differently in zero gravity.â
I gape at her. âThat? That was your question? Weâre talking about a real astronaut in outer space, and thatâs what you choose to ask them?â
She shrugs. âI must know.â
âAlso, I heard this campâs got you making bottle rockets. What if you mix all the ingredients wrong and accidentally create a biological weapon?â
Maryanne thinks it over for a beat. âThen I guess we kill everyone at camp.â
âWow. Kid. Thatâs dark.â Laughing, I shake off the fact that my little sister might be a psychopath. âAll right, go change out of that uniform. Mini golf ainât going to play itself.â
âEeee! I love it when youâre home!â
Next thing I know, she throws her skinny arms around me. I lift her off her feet in a big hug, making her laugh in delight.
I love being home too. I love my family, and I especially love this geeky girl in my arms. Some kids might resent their parents for giving them a sibling after eleven years of being an only child, but Maryanneâs had me wrapped around her little finger since she was an hour old and I was a preteen. I used to race home from hockey practice and demand to feed her. At night, I would sing her lullabies until my parents sat me down one day, informed me that I canât sing, and said they would prefer, for the sake of their ears, not to hear my singing voice ever again. Merciless, those two.
I can hear them chatting in the kitchen, so I drift down the hall toward the doorway.
Mom just got home from a meeting, and she leans against the white granite counter in her trademark business getupâfitted slacks and a silk blouseâwith her curly black hair pulled into a tight bun at her nape. She always looks like she stepped off the cover of a corporate magazine.
Dad, meanwhile, is a perpetual bum. Even before he started working from home, heâd wear jeans and a T-shirt to the office. Now the jeans have been replaced with baggy sweatpants.
They make such an odd couple. They met in high school when Mom was the type-A class president and Dad was the laid-back hockey star. Now heâs the laid-back entrepreneur who sort of fell into a super-successful business after his NHL dreams didnât pan out. And sheâs the type-A town manager of Heartsong, Vermont, a position that works functionally as a mayor. Sheâs the first Black woman to ever hold the position, so it was a big deal when she was elected by the city council. Heartsong has gotten a lot more progressive over the past ten years. The townspeople adore my mom.
My parents glance over at my entrance, halting their conversation.
âSorry to interrupt,â I say.
âOh, youâre not interrupting,â Mom answers quickly. âJust discussing work stuff. Whereâs your sister?â
âChanging out of her camp uniform. Iâm taking her mini golfing.â I gesture to my dadâs bare arms and ask, âYou been hitting the course this summer? Your arms are looking less pudgy from the last time I saw them.â
He glares in indignation. âPudgy? How dare you?â
âThe truth hurts, bro. Youâve definitely been working out or something, though. You look great.â He mustâve lost a solid fifteen pounds these past few months.
âTrying to.â
âI probably shouldnât have brought so much sausage, then,â I say with a grin. I mightâve gone a little overboard when I paid a visit to my favorite butcher in Boston on my way to Heartsong.
âWait, thereâs sausage?â His eyes light up. âPlease tell me itâs from Gustav.â
âNo, I went to some generic grocery store butcher. Of course itâs from Gustav.â
Mom glances from me to Dad. âI will never understand this obsession.â
âSome people just canât see the big picture,â Dad says, nodding at me.
I nod back. âExactly.â
Sheâs exasperated. âWhat does sausage have to do with the big picture? What big picture are we even talking about? You know whatâforget it! I donât care. Iâm just happy youâre home,â Mom says, wrapping her arms around my waist.
Her head barely grazes my chin. At six one, I inherited Dadâs height and the perfect blend of their skin tones. I gotta say, Iâm really fucking good-looking.
âI wish you could stay longer,â she clucks.
âMe too, but Iâm hosting a goodbye party for Beck on Saturday night.â
Her eyes widen. âIs he moving?â
âNo. Heâs going to Australia on vacation. This dude demands a goodbye party for a monthlong vacay.â
âIâve always liked that guy,â Dad remarks, because everyone likes Beckett Dunne. He oozes charm, that asshole.
âIâll come back again next week,â I promise my folks. âI want to try to be here every weekend for the rest of the summer.â
Mom is pleased. âYour sister is going to love that.â She pauses. âAre you going to see Lynsey while youâre here? We ran into her the other night at the pancake house.â
âYeah, I know. She told me.â
âOh, so youâre still talking.â Mom speaks in a careful tone.
I honestly canât gauge if my parents are upset or thrilled that Lynsey and I are broken up. Sometimes, they really seemed to like her. And then other times, Iâd catch them exchanging looks, as they do now.
âYouâd be happy if we got back together, right?â I ask them.
Mom blinks in surprise. âI didnât realize you two were discussing getting back together.â
âWeâre not. Just hypothetically, youâd be happy with it if we did?â
âWe will always support whatever you do,â she says, and Dad nods in agreement.
Itâs not quite an answer. But Iâm also not going to push a hypothetical, given that Lynsey has shown zero desire to rekindle our relationship.
âAll right, Iâm going to track down the squirt and head out. Let her expend some energy on the putt-putt course and then fill her up with junk food and sugar so she crashes hard when we get home.â
âThanks for taking her out. Weâre excited to have a quiet night in.â Dad winks at Mom.
âSeriously, gross. I donât want to think about the activities you have planned while weâre gone.â
Dad offers a wolfish look. âProbably a good idea.â
âI literally just said I donât want to know,â I growl.
I hear them laughing at me as I stomp out of the kitchen.
The following night, Dad and I indulge in a Stanley Cup marathon where we watch old footage featuring some of our favorite championship wins. Heâs been recording every single game for the last twenty-five years, so we have plenty to choose from. When we get to the game Garrett Graham won with the Bruins, sweeping that series 4â0, Dad says, âI canât believe Luke married into that family.â
âRight? I mean, I canât believe heâs married, period. But thatâs a serious family to join.â I marvel. âHockey royalty doesnât even do it justice.â
I note the way Dadâs eyes shine when Graham scores one of the most beautiful goals Iâve ever seen to secure the Cup for the team. Fuck, I canât wait for the opportunity to chase that trophy. I want to hold the Stanley Cup in my hands. I want to see the cool silver shimmer under stadium lights.
âDo you miss it?â I ask my father. âPlaying?â
âEvery day.â He speaks without hesitation, and it brings a clench to my chest.
I canât imagine how devastating it would be to skate onto the ice for your very first NHL game and suffer a career-ending injury on your very first shift. In one tragic play, Dad tore both his ACL and MCL, and his knee was collateral damage. There was no way he could ever play at the same level again. His joint stability was shot, and the doctors warned him he could do permanent damage if he kept playing.
Hockey was his entire life, and it was stolen from him. When I was drafted by Chicago, I broke down and cried. Seeing the pride on my dadâs face, knowing I was going to play for the same team he had, albeit fleetinglyâit had triggered a wave of sheer, throat-closing emotion. All Iâve ever wanted was to make him proud. To make both of them proud. I donât care how sappy it makes me, but theyâre legit the best parents anyone could ever have. Maryanne and I are beyond lucky.
Speaking of Maryanne, she chooses that moment to wander into the family room and flop on the couch between us, chattering on about tomorrowâs itinerary. Theyâre going to the planetarium.
âMan, space camp actually sounds dope,â I remark.
âItâs fun,â she acknowledges. âBut! Geology camp is even better.â
âUh-huh. Is it now?â I play along. From the corner of my eye, I see Dad fighting a smile.
âAbsolutely!â Maryanne proceeds to tell us about geology camp, explaining how there are three whole days dedicated to archaeology, when they do a mock excavation. âAnd! We get to make our own magnetic fields. And! We go on rock hunts. The brochure says thereâs tons of agate around here.â
âA what?â I ask.
âAgate. Itâs a gemstone.â She huffs at me. âDonât you know anything about Vermont geology?â
âNope. And Iâm insulted that you think I would. I was popular in school.â
âIâm very popular,â Maryanne says haughtily, then continues spitting out geology camp stats. âOh! And we get to dig for serpentine!â
âLike snakes?â I wrinkle my forehead.
âNo. Itâs a rock. Serpentine. And itâs so pretty. Itâs greenish and black and super smooth. The brochure says they give us these little pickaxes we can use to dig.â
âIâm sorry, what? Theyâre giving children pickaxes?â
âSo?â Maryanne challenges.
âSo that seems aggressively irresponsible.â
Dad howls with laughter.
The rest of the visit flies by, and Iâm bummed to say goodbye when Friday rolls around. I leave Heartsong after the morning rush, making it back to Hastings in the early afternoon.
Almost immediately, I realize something has happened to the residents of my apartment complex.
Theyâve been replaced by pod people.
Pod people who, for some reason, have it out for me.
Not that everyone was overly friendly before, but at least I got smiles and introductions when I wandered around Meadow Hill.
Suddenly everyone is borderline hostile.
Like that dude, Niall, who lives downstairs. When I bump into him in the outdoor visitorsâ lot where I park my Mercedes, he points his finger at me and snaps, âYour musicâs too loud.â Then he clicks the key fob to lock his little Toyota hatchback and stalks off.
Harry, who mans the lobby in the Sycamore building, scowls when I give him a heads-up that Iâm having people over on Saturday. Iâm not even obligated to tell him. It was a courtesy.
Then, on the path, I pass one of the married couples who live in Weeping Willow, and the wife gives me a look that could freeze water.
When I say hello, she responds with, âYeah, okay.â
Now, Iâm checking my mail after two days away, and the woman who lives next door to NiallâI think her name is Priya?âcautiously approaches the mailboxes as if sheâs entering a lionâs cage.
I greet her with a smile and realize, no, thatâs not wariness. Her expression conveys deep contempt, as if sheâs entering the cage of a lion she wants to murder.
âHello,â I say, my smile faltering.
âSure.â
I donât know if âsureâ is better than âyeah, okay,â but it sort of feels like itâs a rung lower on the greeting ladder.
âPriya, right?â I reintroduce myself. âShane.â
âI remember your name. I donât forget names.â
âRight, you must be good at that. Keeping track of all those clients. Diana mentioned you were a counselor or something?â
âIâm a psychotherapist.â
âThatâs really cool. Did you go to school for that?â Itâs the dumbest question I could have asked, but sheâs making me uncomfortable with those sullen eyes and the frown marring her lips.
âI chose to go the psychotherapy route, but I have both an MD in psychiatry and a PhD in psychology.â She spares me a disparaging look before turning to unlock her mailbox. âFrom Harvard.â
âWow.â Iâm suitably impressed.
âI know, right? Isnât it astonishing that women can be doctors in the twenty-first century? That our worth is no longer tied to the way men treat us?â
I blink.
Sheâs smiling sweetly at me.
I have no idea what the fuck is going on.
So I keep a pleasant expression plastered on my face and say, âDefinitely. Five gold stars for womenâs liberation.â
Her eyes narrow. Jesus. Those eyes. Dark as coal. âAre you mocking the feminist movement?â
âNot at all. I think itâs great.â I hastily tuck my mail under my arm. âOkay, I have to go now.â
I hurry out of the vestibule, feeling Priyaâs gaze piercing into my back.
What the hell is the matter with these people? None of them threw a welcome parade for me, but I assumed thatâs because they didnât like the idea of a college guy moving into a complex full of couples and families. But thereâs a large number of singles in Meadow Hill too, and nearly all the ones Iâve run into today have acted like total dickheads.
It isnât until I go outside for a swim a couple of hours later that I finally encounter a friendly face, belonging to a woman in her early fifties whoâs leaving the pool area as Iâm entering. Iâve seen her hanging out at the pool before, but this is the first time sheâs stopped to chat. Before now, she seemed content to ogle me from behind her book while I pretended not to notice.
âHello! Itâs Shane, right?â She has dyed-red hair, very tanned skin, and, unlike everyone else in this goddamn place today, is sporting an actual smile.
âYup. Thatâs me.â I extend a hand to her. âNice to meet you.â
âIâm Veronika. Cherry Blossom, 1A.â
Her hand lingers a little too long, until Iâm forced to wrench mine away. I use the pretense of needing to pull my phone out of my pocket, but that simply draws her attention to the phone and gives her the wrong idea.
âYes, good call, we should exchange numbers!â Veronika sounds delighted. She has one of those raspy voices that tells me she probably smoked two packs a day in her youth. Maybe still does. âItâs always smart to have a neighborâs contact info. Would you like me to add you to our Meadow Hill group chat?â
Thereâs a group chat?
Fuckinâ Dixon. I bet sheâs been scheming to keep me off it.
âIâd love that,â I tell Veronika, flashing her my dimples.
She giggles like a schoolgirl. We exchange numbers, and she saunters off with the exaggerated sway of her hips.
Iâm pretty sure that lady wants to bone me.
I stretch my towel over one of the loungers and settle on top of it, deciding to scroll on my phone for a while before swimming laps. I just completed an hour workout in the Meadow Hill gym, and I think maybe I overdid it. Itâs arm day, so the thought of using my arms again to propel myself through water makes every muscle in my body weep.
I take my off-season training seriously, but this summer Iâm kicking it into a whole new gear. I plan to be in the best shape of my life when hockey season starts. Thereâs no room for slacking off anymore. This time next year, Iâll be reporting to training camp. The last thing I want to do is show up for my first NHL training camp huffing and puffing like a fifty-year-old smoker because I let myself get out of shape.
I find some new messages in our guysâ group chat. THE BOYS ALL CAPS, as Beckett named it. And yes, ALL CAPS is part of it. I truly donât know why women fawn all over that guy. Heâs not funny.
BECKETT:
Anyone feel like hitting up a club tonight?
WILL:
Pass. Iâm too sunburnt to move.
Originally the group chat was only for me, Beckett, and Ryder, but Beck added Will after they became joined at the hip. Iâve never met two dudes more obsessed with time-travel movies. And group sex. They do a lot of that too. But I donât judge.
BECKETT:
You should have asked one of the milfs to rub sunscreen all over your dick.
WILL:
I donât fuck the clients. Gonna keep saying that until youâre forced to accept it.
BECKETT:
Never. Ryder, you down?
RYDER:
Me personally? Fuck no. But lemme ask the wife. If she wants to go, Iâll go.
BECKETT:
Wow.
RYDER:
Wow what?
BECKETT:
That woman owns you now. You realize that, right, mate?
RYDER:
Yes and?
I raise a brow at the screen. Lord, whatâs happened to my buddy Ryder? Dudeâs gone from avoiding girlfriends like the plague to getting married and happily handing over his balls on a silver platter.
Although I suppose if my wife were Gigi Graham, Iâd gladly let her handle my balls.
I heard her come once. I still think about that sometimes. Jerked off to it a few times too, though Iâd never tell Ryder that. Heâd rip my throat out.
Or maybe he wouldnât?
I meanâ¦he was fully aware I was standing outside the door of that study room when he and Gigi fooled around in the library last fall. And Iâm sure he knows I wouldâve had to be painfully hard listening to her soft moans. Part of me thinks he mightâve let me watch if Gigi had wanted it. Heâd give that woman anything she asked her. Manâs smitten.
Watching isnât my kink, though.
Being watched, on the other handâ¦I could get on board with that. But thatâs not something Iâd ever suggest to a girlfriend. The one time I mentioned this kink to Lynsey, she was so disgusted that I never brought it up again. She accused me of watching too much pornography. Which is laughably not the case because I very rarely use porn to jack off. I prefer the real thing.
Well, not so much these days. Now that random hookups are off the table thanks to the Crystal fiasco, the only way Iâm getting laid is if I 1) have a girlfriend or 2) find myself a friends-with-benefits arrangement. Someone I spend an extended amount of time with. Someone to have regular sex with instead of impersonal and hollow one-night stands.
Iâm sending a message to the group chat saying I donât feel like going out tonight when the phone vibrates in my hand. I brighten when I see the notification.
Hell yeah. Progress! I may have been spurned by everyone else today, but at least I won over Veronika. And now maybe the rest of them will be wowed by my stellar personality via my hilarious messages and start warming up to me.
No sooner does the optimism take root than another notification pops up.