Chapter Twenty-Six

Coming out of wolf form when you've spent time dark was like waking up from a dream you can't remember. Your body shifts back and you are left on two legs, confused as to what happened. The confusion for me lasted all of two seconds before everything crashed into me. My mother had passed away. I hit my knees and cried for the loss of the woman who had birthed me, raised me, loved me. I cried at the pain that tore at my chest at the thought I would never again see her smile, never again hold her hand, give her flowers, or simply bask in her presence.

I knew it was coming but could anyone ever truly prepare for the death of a loved one? I coughed and rubbed at my eyes. Ezekiel and Micheal whined as they moved around me. I coughed again, lingering in the pain of the loss of my mother. I let out a shuddering breath as the two wilds pushed around me, trying to give me comfort. My mother had died and there was a different sensation that twisted my stomach heavily and a wave of apprehension hit me as I realized what I had done.

"Shey." The name was torn from me, guilt and regret tore at my insides as I remembered what I had done, how I had lashed out. I had done more than simply yell at her. I had blamed her. Michael nudged at me and I shook my head, shifting quickly. I needed to find her. I needed to try and fix what I had done. I could practically see the chasm that had opened up between us because of my words. I couldn't lose her too. I had just lost my mother, I couldn't handle losing Shey on top of that.

Shey loved my mother, had adored her and I had accused her of causing her death, of killing her. There was nothing I could have said that would have been worse than that. I had to find her. The bond wrapped around me, making it hard to breathe. It was furious for what I had done, had said to Shey. It was furious that I had damaged my chances at a future and I was furious at the fact I had been so utterly stupid as to accuse her of something so vile.

There was no excuse for my behaviour. No logical reason for it. Yes my mother was gone, she was gone and I would never see her again but lashing out like that had no justification. My wolf whined in the back of my head, he understood it was partially his fault. His uncontrollable anger had exasperated the problem, had dulled my mind, making me lash out at those I loved. At Shey. The pain of losing my mother was intense but the pain I got at the thought of losing Shey was worse. She was to be my future, the one thing I could look forward to through the grief of my loss and I wasn't sure how badly I had ruined my chances.

I couldn't let her go. My wolf paced in the back of my mind, he didn't want to lose her and I wanted to chain him again but he had escaped my first set. He was pushing back harder than normal, feeding off of the intense emotions rolling through me and I had to be careful. He didn't want to lose her and I knew if I pushed him too much we would do something else we would end up regretting.

My paws carried me through the forest. We were at the furthest edge of the territory. Ezekiel and Michael ran beside me, their coats brushing mine, reminding me that they were with me. They sent comfort over our mind link but sadness lingered on the edges of it. My mother's passing would affect many people in the pack. She was well liked through the territory because she was never one to balk at duty or one to withhold kindness. I knew there were quite a few shifters that my mother has presided over their births. It was a show of comfort and solidarity for the female giving birth. Letting her know that despite the difference in power and rank, all the females suffered the same in that.

She had been loved by so many and my chest hurt just thinking about her but finding Shey and ensuring she stayed with me was my only concern at the moment. My mother was gone and I couldn't change that no matter how much I wished too. I could, however, try to make things right with Shey. I ran faster, trying to make it back to the house. The quicker I made it back, the less chance there was of Shey making it further from the territory than she already had. It was morning and she had a good few hours to run. The thought made my heart beat rapidly, sending the organ pounding uncomfortably against my ribs.

I didn't want to lose her too. She was all that I had left, she was my future and the thought of how badly I had damaged it made me panicky. I had to fix it. I had to find her and fix what I had done. The bond was endlessly tormenting me, twisting at my organs, urging my limbs to move faster. I weaved through the trees, jumping over logs and dodging branches. We were still a good few minutes away from the house and I could feel the pack pressing down on my mind. I could feel their confusion but I pushed it away, blocking them out.

Find Shey? Michael's voice pushed into my mind, there was a sharp edge to his voice and I knew he wasn't happy with me. I wasn't happy with me.

Start to look. We need to find her. I nodded my head once and they immediately moved away from me, heading into the forest. I surged forward, pushing my body faster, my claws digging into the earth, propelling me forward.

The house finally came into view and I padded towards a familiar clothing cache. I shifted, my muscles and bones aching at the action. I reached into the small cave made at the base of a tree, pulling out the water proof bag and grabbing a pair of jeans. I yanked them on before jogging towards the house. I inhaled deeply, there was a chaotic mash-up of various scents. I inhaled deeply again, sorting through the scents that were bombarding me. I could scent mainly pack members but underneath it I could smell a faint familiar scent.

It was Azrael's slightly earthy scent and I jolted at it before inhaling again. I focused on his scent, separating it from the rest of them. It was in a faint trail towards the house and when I inhaled again I caught a very faint smell of citrus and sweetness that mixed with Azrael's scent. My wolf snarled in my head and I shoved him away, I didn't need his possessiveness while looking for Shey. I headed towards the house and the back door was flung open violently, Carrie stood in it, her face an even and deadly mask.

"Luka. Nathaniel. Scott. Sterling." Her voice was tight, clipped, and pissed beyond all hell and I stared at her, my eyes wide. "What the fuck is wrong with you?" Her voice turned snarly as she stalked towards me. "I told you. I tried to teach you."

"Gamgam-"

"Oh no, no, no, Luka!" She pointed at me viciously. "Don't you fucking Gamgam me! What the fuck is wrong with you?" She stopped toe to toe with me, breathing heavily. Her eyes were so dark they were like the deep of the sea, tinged with blue but but so dark they were nearly black. She was vibrating and my wolf snarled at her, sensing her challenge. "I have tried to teach you for years! Years of my life fucking wasted!"

"Don't." I stared at her, urging her to back down.

"Oh hell no!" She spat it out and leaned towards me and a growl vibrated in my throat. My wolf pushed forward and I was having a hard time holding him back. "I told you again and again to not lash out. I told you repeatedly and I fucking wasted my breath!"

"Don't." It was threaded with a warning growl and I moved around her.

"Don't you fucking ignore me." She grabbed my arm, the tips of her extended claws biting into my skin as she yanked me backwards. "Your mother is gone, Luka, but it doesn't excuse what you did! I can't believe how you behaved!" I closed my eyes, trying my hardest to shove my wolf back. He demanded her obedience, to answer her challenge.

"I need to find Shey." I gritted my teeth, hoping she would hear the feral tone in my voice, hear the wolf that was pushing forward at her challenge.

"Shey? Shey? Your mate? The one you threatened to kill? The one you blamed for your mother's death? That Shey?" She spat it out, her eyes so dark they were nearly black. "The one you twisted your grief around to hurt? That particular Shey? I tried my fucking best with your parents to raise you right but you just had to make someone hurt just as badly as you did, didn't you?" The words were enough to make my wolf surge down my limbs as she snarled at me.

"Don't." The word was so twisted with a growl that it was garbled. I pulled away from her, my thoughts turning to Shey. I needed to find her. I didn't have time to listen to her yell at me, I didn't have the patience for it.

"Don't you fucking use that tone with me. I have had enough! If you won't learn this lesson the easy way, fine, I'll teach you the fucking mountain way." There was the sound of bones cracking, joints popping, and clothes ripping. I whirled around right as Gamgam snarled at me, her thin, grey wolf leaping at me.

I snarled in return, throwing a fist that snapped her snout to the side with a yelp. A red haze covered my vision. "Don't! This is your last wa-" She jumped at me again, her claws ripping up chunks of earth from the force of her leap. My wolf surged forward, taking over. My limbs snapped and reshaped in an instant, the jeans tearing to shreds as I met her in the air. Our bodies collided in a mass of fur, teeth, and claws. She aimed at my throat but I twisted out of the way, her jaws closing on nothing but air with a sharp snap.

Vicious growls and snarls escaped her throat and mine as we fought for a the dominant position. We broke apart and my lips curled back over my teeth as we circled. She gave a short lunge forward, a snarl escaping her throat as she snapped at me, trying to entice me into attacking. I dropped into a crouch, a growling snarl vibrating the air around me. Power radiated off of the both of us as we continued circling.

She lunged at me again and I met her once more, my teeth trying to find a purchase on her throat. I needed her submission. The fight needed to end. The more time I spent fighting Gamgam, the more time Shey had to run away. Her bites became more vicious, drawing blood as she tore into my skin. Her claws slashed at me, trying to find a grip in my flesh so she could throw me onto my back. I snapped back at her, my warning snapping becoming more erratic and harsh, breaking skin instead of nipping at it.

Her blood coated my tongue and teeth as I fought more aggressive but she wasn't giving in, wasn't submitting. She managed to get me onto my side and I used my back legs to throw her off. She landed with a yelp as I shook myself and stalked towards her, growls rattling in my throat. She jumped to her feet, favouring her front right leg as she snarled at me. I took advantage and jumped at her as I slammed into her, we rolled across the ground in a tangle of snapping jaws, slashing claws, and flying fur.

She wasn't submitting and my attacks became more pointed and brutal. Her attacks grew just as ferocious as mine. More blood was drawn, more skin was split and slashed. Fur was torn and sent flying, there was no give on either side and I came to the sudden realization that the fight was not going to end well. It had been started and there was no positive end to the road we had taken. There was only pain, hurt, and death waiting for either of us.

Carrie was a mountain shifter, they respected strength. She respected strength. Her refusal to submit let me know that she did not believe I was strong enough to be her Alpha. That she no longer respected me as her Alpha. My teeth found her throat and I clamped down hard. I managed to get her on her back but she continued fighting, my instincts drove me to close my jaws on her throat. I could hear her wheezing for breath but the frenzied state she had worked me into wouldn't let me lessen the grip.

There was shouting that made through the fuzzy anger laced dominance in my brain and I became aware of someone tugging on my jaws, trying to pry them apart without success. Another person started tugging on the scruff of my neck and I growled menacingly right before someone slammed their foot into the side of my ribs. I ignored it, unwilling to let go before a harder kick slammed off my ribcage, nearly fracturing several of the bones. I yelped, the motion removing Gamgam's throat from my mouth. I was tacked and pinned to the ground, I fought to get out of the restraining grips.

"Alpha, you need to shift!" Benji's voice was strained and almost frantic as he grabbed the fur at the sides of my face. "Listen! You need to shift back. Don't do this. Not today." Benji's voice cut through everything and I felt reality slipping back into my mind, cutting through the power high I had gotten from the fight.

"Luka Sterling, you shift back right now!" Gamgam's voice was sharp and I snarled at her. She had a blanket wrapped around her as she stormed over, her face twisted as she reached out and pinched my ear hard. Blood streaked her skin but the small wounds were already healing. "You shift right now." She pinched my ear tightly, unrelenting until I did as she ordered. I shifted back my bones re-shifting and changing places before I knelt on the ground with Gamgam holding onto my ear and she gave no other words as she yanked me up by my ear.

I hissed at the pain as she started to drag me into the house, muttering angrily under her breath. "I should finish what I started out on that lawn. I should tune you in the mountain way, Luka Nathaniel Scott!" As soon as we were in the house she let her hand drop from my ear before she whirled around, slamming the door shut. "What the fuck is wrong with you? I told you to get your shit together. I told you." She spun around again and advanced on me. I gave a low growl of warning that she ignored as she grabbed my ear again and started yanking me down the hall. "Do you know what you did to her? Do you?" She shoved a bedroom door open and yanked me inside, I followed as closely as I could to avoid getting my ear ripped off.

"I need to-"

"You don't need to do anything, you fuck! Accusing her of killing your mother? She loved Lily. She loved her and you threw that at her. You little shit!" Gamgam pinched my ear harder, causing me to yelp before shoving my head away and stalking towards the dresser. "Do you know what that poor fetita has gone through?" She viciously yanked open the dresser and I tried to fight against my wolf's aggression. He didn't like that she had refused to submit and he was pacing wildly in the back of my head, snarling indiscriminately.

"Her mother died when she was eighteen, curule!" The has curse stunned my wolf and I slightly. Gamgam never swore in Romanian, not towards people at least. "She killed her mother." The words made my eyes go wide and I blinked a few times.

"Pardon?"

"You heard me, curule! She killed her and you accused her of killing yours. Hope that little outburst made you happy because it destroyed her. You got your wish, someone is just as hurt and broken as you are. Does that make you feel good? Does that make you feel better?" Her words were vicious as she yanked out some clothing and whipped them at my head before she moved to the closet and yanked open the door. "I took her to the temple to help prepare Lily, to get her mind off of her guilt and she bolted half way through. She was gone for four hours, Luka." I slowly pulled on the clothes Gamgam had thrown at me. It was a black pair of jeans and a black shirt. It made my head and heart ache to listen to her but I forced myself too.

"I sent people out looking for her. Then Azrael arrived and I sent him out too. He found her in the cemetery. She had dug Lily's grave and he found her lying in the bottom of it, fucking catatonic." Gamgam whirled around as she tugged a black dress on. "Was unconscious when he brought her back. Her hands were torn to shit from the digging. After she got cleaned up she would just sit there. She would stare with this fucking broken look on her face. She would stare but she wouldn't say anything. You broke her, Luka. Like she was some sort of unwanted toy all because you had to make someone, anyone, hurt like you do." She advanced on me again, anger flushing her face red and her eyes darkened. I could see her wolf struggling with her, wanting to come out once more.

"Do you know the worst part of this entire thing, the absolutely worst part? She doesn't hate you for it, she hates herself!" She narrowed her eyes at me, her jaw clenching together tightly. He words sliced into me deeper than her claws and teeth ever could. "I hope you are happy and I hope you are proud of yourself. You would have been better off just rejecting her and leaving her to die. That would have been better than what you did to her. Your mother is dead but what you did is fucking inexcusable." She spat the words at me, her face twisting with an unheard snarl before she left the room, slamming the door behind her.

I was left to my own thoughts, even my wolf was stunned and silent. I swayed slightly, I wasn't entirely sure what I was feeling but it wasn't good. Shey had killed her own mother and I had blamed her for killing mine. A heavy feeling of guilty swamped me and attempted to drag me to the floor. Everything was fucked up and it was my fault. There was no one else to blame. I was the one who had no control over my emotions, I was the one who always lashed out. I was the one who screamed at Shey, who had taken my anger out on her.

Gamgam was right. I wanted someone to hurt just as badly as I did. I had gotten that wish and it made me feel fucking horrible. I ran my hand through my hair, bunching it, tugging on the strands in agitation. I wasn't even sure where to begin with trying to fix it. I had no clue what to do or how to do it. How could I apologize to someone I had done that too? The bond was vicious as it tore through my insides, demanding me to fix my mistake, to make it better.

I turned almost robotically and headed out of the bedroom. The house was silent and I stared straight forward as I walked through it. No one was inside or outside that I could feel. More than likely they had all gone to the cemetery. I swallowed as I pushed open the front door and stepped outside. A small figure wrapped their arms around me and Maricella's familiar scent swirled in the air.

My arms stayed at my side as she pulled back, her hands grasped my face. "I'm sorry for your loss." Her voice was soft but I couldn't understand the look in her grey eyes. "You can fix this, Luka. It's okay." There was conviction to her voice and I closed my eyes, unwilling to look at her soft kindness. Her thumbs brushed my cheekbones, scratching at my stubble. "This can be fixed. Just sit down and communicate with her. Explain what you feel and then apologize. It's all you can do." She patted my cheeks before going onto the tips of her toes and kissing my cheek. "Let her know. Be honest with her." She let my face go and wrapped her arms around me again.

"I don't even know if she wants to see me." I tentatively wrapped my arms around her before looking around. Bennett was standing beside a familiar beat up jeep.

"She's your mate, Luka. She will want to see you, she's grieving like you are." She let me go and linked her arm through mine. There was such a sincerity to her voice that I almost believed her. She lead me down the stairs and to the driveway. "Bennett, we can head to the cemetery." The cold male nodded, pushing off of the jeep and placing his hand on Mari's back.

"How are you doing, Luka?" His voice was still as icy as it had ever been but there was a touch of concern to his voice that softened the harshness of it.

"I've been better." I was a fucking mess. My mother was gone but that ache wasn't as harsh. I had been preparing for her death for years, it was painful but bearable the more time that passed. However the thought of what I had done to Shey, what I had done to our relationship was excruciating. My mother didn't have a future, as painful as it was to admit, she didn't. Shey and I did and I potentially destroyed it.

"We all have. You'll make it through." He removed his hand from Mari's back and squeezed my shoulder and I nodded.

"Thanks." The word was strained and I coughed lightly. We entered the trees, following the path towards the graveyard. Silence followed us and a somber feelings settled over me. As much as I had known her death was inevitable, I still didn't want to see her being lowered into the ground. I didn't want to say goodbye. I had to but that did not mean I wanted to.

It was time.

I had been given so much with her but now it was her time to move on. It was her time to be with my father, to rest in Mene's arms as her scales were stripped bare. I held my chin up higher. I had to be strong for the pack, I had to show strength and resilience. Mari squeezed me gently, reminding me of the support I had.

"How many came with you?" The question hung it the air for a moment before Mari let out a small sigh.

"Bennett and I. Amber and Dad, Uncle Jace, Davin and Bailey." She looked up at me and I tried to ignore her gaze on the side of my face. "Jay and Collin wanted to come but with Angie getting further along in her pregnancy they needed some others to stay with her and Seamus." I nodded in acknowledgement. I had forgotten that Angela had gotten pregnant. It was best to have others there to make sure things were safe and patrolled. "Where are Michael and Ezekiel?" She was looking around as if she could see them and I sighed, probing down the mindlink between the three of us. They were waiting at the graveside, mourning the lost Alpha Female.

"At the graveyard." I swallowed, we were getting closer and closer the final goodbye I would have to give my mother.

"I see." Mari nodded as she squeezed me again. "We're here for you, Luka." She leaned her head against my shoulder and I coughed, trying to get rid of the lump in my throat. The closer the cemetery grew, the larger my urge to cry grew. I didn't want to break down or cry again but she was my mother, the one person who had supported me. Lowering her in the ground was supposed to be hard and painful. I could hear the pack through the trees, I was positive all of them had showed up. My mother was well loved.

I let out a shuddering sigh as we continued the trek. My muscles and skin ached from the fight I had gotten into with Gamgam. Shame flooded me at the remembrance. I never should have taken her on. I knew she wouldn't have submitted, Gamgam only ever willingly submitted, no one could force anything out of her. That was what made her respect so wanted. You wouldn't get her submission without it. I let out another heavy sigh and Mari squeezed me tightly again.

"It's okay. We're right here with you." She murmured the words as we broke the treeline and stepped into the cemetery. The pack was clustered around my family's burial plots and I inhaled deeply before moving quicker, disentangling myself from Mari's grip. I had to do it on my own. My strides covered the ground between me and the pack quickly and several pack members looked back, their faces twisted with sympathy and grief as they saw me.

They moved to the side, creating a path for me to move through and I walked through them. Hands reached out and touched me, trying to help me shoulder the burden of my mother's death. I could see her body laying beside the roughly dug hole and I stopped at the foot of her grave, the smell of slight decay covered by moonvines brushed my nose but it was the soft citrus and sweetness that caught my attention.

My eyes sought out what my nose had found and I spotted her standing beside Azrael, She was standing close to him and my wolf snarled in my head at their proximity and I shoved him away. Her face was almost chalky white in appearance and I could see dark rims around her eyes. She looked as Gamgam had said, broken. My heart twisted and ached in my chest and the bond screeched rolled in me at the slightly empty, pained look in her eyes. It demanded I fix it, to fix her but looking at her I didn't even know where to start.

I could sense that the entire pack's eyes were on me but I couldn't take my eyes off Shey. She looked lost. All I wanted to do was pull her into my arms and tell her how sorry I was. Tears pricked at my eyes but I forced them away. She looked clean, her hair was pulled back into a braid and her clothes were clean. She looked cared for but not in the way it mattered, not in the way she needed to be at the moment. I cleared my throat slightly and she jumped at the noise, I winced at the implications it brought.

I opened my mouth, trying to think of what to say. I closed it and swallowed hard. "There are many words that could be said about my mother." I spoke slowly, trying to gather my thoughts and to try and hide the shakiness of my voice. "She was loving and caring. She was kind and sweet. She was one of the brightest souls I have ever seen and my world will be dark without her." I coughed against the lump in my throat.

"There are many things I can say, could say but the only ones that come to mind right now is that I will miss her." I turned to look at where she lay on the ground, her skin clean and her body wrapped in the vines. "I will miss her smile, her laugh. I will miss her encouragement and her unwavering resilience. I will simply miss her. She was my mother but it was her time. I just hope her and my father can find each other once more. She was his heart and he was her soul. They are two pieces of a whole being and they belong together. Despite how badly I wish for her to be with me, she needs to be with him now."

"I had my time with her, it's his turn now." I looked up at the sky, I could almost sense my father's presence. "You take care of her because I will find away to come up there and kick your ass if you ever do anything other than make her smile. Treat her right. You take care of her for me because I can't anymore." I looked back down at her before I slowly climbed into the grave. No one but me would lay her down in her final resting place. It would be my last act as her son.

Benji moved over and gently picked her up, holding her out for me. I took her into my arms gently, laying her down at the bottom of the grave. I bit my lip to fight back the tears as I gently smoothed down her hair and her cheeks. Her body was cold and i could tell rigour mortise was starting to set in. I kissed her forehead gently. "I'll miss you." I pulled back and my eyes caught a flash of silver in her hands. I couldn't see what it was exactly but it looked suspiciously like a certain moonstone pendant Shey used to wear. It was tucked under the moonvines and under a few of my mother's fingers.

I stood up slowly, taking a deep breath to fight back the tears before I reached for the lip of the grave. A strong hand grasped mine and Jace helped haul me out. He pulled me tight to his chest, thumping on my back hard before he let me go. Davin held out a shovel, his eyes showing the empathy that he was feeling. I wasn't the only one who had lost a mother.

I took it and moved over to the dirt pile, digging the shovel far into it I pulled out a large shovelful of earth and gently poured it into the grave. I could hear other shovels digging into the mound of earth and I mindlessly continued my filling of the grave. I ignored the others and heaved heavy shovelfuls of dirt to the grave, burying the last of my family.

Sweat beaded on my forehead and my palms started to ache before Jace stopped me, prying my fingers off of shovel and pushing me back towards Maricella. He took my spot, taking over filling the grave. I watched the level of the earth in the grave rise steadily before my gaze wandered over to Shey. She was staring at the grave, unconsciously leaning towards Azrael who wrapped an arm around the back of her shoulders and squeezed her bicep gently. My wolf surged forward and my eyes went wide before I shoved him back hard.

He snarled at me and paced back and forth in the back of my head, his presence pushing down on me. He wanted her in our arms, not Azrael's. I understood it, I truly did but he lacked tact and reacting violently towards Shey and Azrael would only spell disaster. I focused on keeping him back as I watched as Shey seemed to let out a heaving sigh. Azrael squeezed her bicep again before his pulled his arm away. It was getting hard to hold my wolf back as he watched Azrael with a touch of menace.

He was too possessive, too much for Shey to deal with in her current state, too much for me to deal with at the moment as well. I couldn't let him be the one to deal with the problem when rational thought was the only way that could fix the issue. I rolled my head, trying my hardest to push him away. I closed my eyes, trying to focus on breathing. If I relaxed, it I calmed my emotions he wouldn't be able to push through everything. I breathed slowly and evenly. In and out. Each breath helping me construct a wall between us.

I wasn't sure how long I had stood there breathing, trying to calm my wolf and my my emotions. It wasn't working, he was still testing me, pushing against the wall I had created. His anger was too much to attempt to cage, to reel in or stop. He wasn't listening to reason, his instincts were driving him forward, feeding his anger, flaming it high and out of control. It took everything I had to hold the wall in place.

"We are heading to the house, Luka." Jace grasped my shoulder and I opened my eyes as I nodded. The grave was filled and most of the pack members had already left. "You head in when you're ready." He nodded at me as he squeezed my shoulder before he patted it gently, letting his hand drop as he walked away. I stared at the empty grave, clenching my teeth tightly as my wolf battered at my defences. I could hear footsteps approaching and I glanced over. Azrael was leading Shey over to me, his hand on her shoulder in what appeared to be comfort. I swallowed heavily and looked at Azrael, his dark blue eyes were sympathetic as he stared at the grave.

"I was blessed to have known her." His voice was gruff as he cleared throat gently. I nodded at him, trying to ignore how my wolf pounded against the wall I had carefully erected between us. I flicked my gaze to Shey who was staring at the ground, her head bowed and her shoulders hunched. She looked deflated and broken. Azrael pushed her closer to me gently. "Family helps." I stared at my pale mate and she finally looked up at me, her eyes were red and I could see that she had been crying. I wanted to wrap my arms around her, to pull her to my side but my wolf was relentless. My body shook from the strain of holding him back. He wanted to prove a point and I wasn't letting him.

Shey moved closer to me, a small shuffling step forward. Wariness radiated off of her and I swallowed again as she moved even closer. I couldn't help it and inhaled deeper. I brought her fresh scent into my lungs, it relaxed my wolf. I inhaled again but this time there was a distinct small wrapped up with hers. Slightly embedded into her skin, a showing of another person lingering around her after a bath or a shower. It was Azrael's scent. He had taken care of her.

My eyes went wide and I shoved my wolf back right as he snarled. He threw all he had at the wall and it crumbled and my vision went dark as he shoved me back and away. I was no where but every where at the same time. I could hear muffled shouting, muted growling rattling my throat, and could taste the faint metallic taste of blood on my tongue. I fought back for control but he wouldn't let me have it. There was satisfaction rolling through him and I struggled to see what he had done.

I struggled against the hold he had on me, fought to get him to let go of the control. I needed out of the darkness and I needed to see the damage he was causing. There was a faint fluttering on the outside of my mind before a torrent of potent emotions surged through my skull. Panic, horror, and terror were prevalent and there was a sharp metallic taste of pain to them. They made my skull hurt and I jolted when I realized they weren't my emotions.

The bond that was twisting at my insides suddenly disappeared and I was slammed back into my body as my wolf retreated. My canines were dug into flesh and blood coated my tongue and teeth. There was a pain filled whimper from the warm body I was holding tight to my chest and my nose caught the scent of citrus and sweetness underneath the cloying scent of blood. I immediately removed my teeth and let Shey go in shock. A large fist snapped my head to the side and I practically saw stars as I stumbled backwards.

"Run!" Azrael's voice was a growl and I shook my head to stop the ringing in my ears. Someone grabbed me roughly by the shoulders, shaking me. I blinked and my gaze fell to Shey as she backed away. A bandaged hand clasped her the crook of her neck where my teeth had just been, blood flowing from the wound steadily. She seemed almost fuzzy as my vision went funny. Terror flooded my head and it was hard to pick out her emotions from my own. My wolf tried to swarm me with a feeling of satisfaction but the intense emotions Shey was putting off made him whimper and pace frantically, unsure of what to do.

He had claimed her.

The thought was enough to bring reality to a sharp, horrific focus. I stared at Azrael as his voice suddenly found it's way through the ringing in my ears. "What the fuck, Luka? What the hell was that?" His voice demanded obedience and I felt the colour drain from my face as I realized what had just happened. My wolf had claimed Shey, against her will. He had physically hurt her to prove a point. Azrael shook me again and I blinked at him.

I felt suddenly sick. "You have to help me." I could barely recognize my own voice as it came out. Horrified, breathy and pleading. Azrael froze. "I can't keep doing this. I can't do this. Help me." I looked at him, silently begging him to help me. The taste of her blood was still in my mouth and I leaned over and gagged. I wiped at my mouth, her blood smirked on my hands and they shook violently as I looked at them. "Oh goddess. Help me!" I looked between them and Azrael before showing him. "Help me." I couldn't do it to her anymore. I couldn't keep hurting her. I couldn't trust myself with her. I couldn't force her to be with a person she could never trust. Tears filled my eyes as her emotions rolled through me just as thick as my own.

"Luka. What do you mean?" He grabbed my shoulders gently and I lifted my hands.

"Help me become the person she can trust. I can't do this to her anymore. I keep hurting her, I can't keep fighting with him." I stared at the blood coating my hands, my breathing stuttering in my chest. I was so horrified at what he had done. I had been warned. I had been told. You can't push your wolf away because they will always push back. "Fix me." It was a whispered plea and Azrael grabbed my hands, wiping the blood off. His movements were almost frantic and he looked at me.

"Tell your guardians you will be leaving. Do not say where you are going. We don't need your pack following us." He grabbed my arm and I didn't protest as he started dragging me through the trees.

I'm going away. Take care of Shey. I sent it to both of them before I shut the down all the mindlinks, leaving me with a rather empty feeling in my head. If it wasn't for Shey's tenuous emotional state I would have been completely alone. Guilt burned in my stomach and I spit on the ground, trying to remove the taste of blood that lingered in my mouth. We made it to Azrael's humvee and I quickly climbed in.

I would do right by her. Everything I would do from this point forward would be for her. For Shey.