{65}✔️

Billie's POV

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Day 6 of cabinchella.

"Dude, get the fuck away from me! Little weirdo!"

"Just fucking kiss me back! You did at the party, why won't you now?! And don't say it's because of Luna because I told you she clearly doesn't want you!"

"Okay, and that may be, but you happen to have a girlfriend who does want you!" She yelled as she slapped my cheeks lightly and shoved me off of her bed. "And above all else, you have a fucking cold! My immune system is trash, I honestly shouldn't even be in the same room as you!"

"Dahlia doesn't want me, she cheated—"

"Dahlia wouldn't cheat on you. I think it's pretty obvious that Luna pushed herself onto Dahlia. She's your ex for Christ sake, you have to know what she's like!"

"You don't understand, Bea. Luna always gets whatever the fuck she wants." I cried. She sighed and leaned over to grab another tissue to hand me.

I didn't think Dahlia would actually fall into her trap, but I guess she did. I was stupid to think she'd stay with me when Luna was coming onto her.

I know Luna has her ways, I know how persuasive she is, and I know she'll do whatever she can to get what and who she wants, but I still thought that maybe Dahlia wouldn't cheat on me. It hurts, but I'm glad I tested her. Now I know I can't be with her. She's a cheater.

"You're a damn fool." Bea shook her head, crossing her arms over her chest before sliding down in bed. "You know damn well that Dahlia wouldn't do something like that to you. If you knew Luna liked her, you should've known she'd try something. It doesn't mean Dahlia likes her back and it doesn't mean Dahlia cheated on you. It just means Luna made a move on Dahlia. It's not your girl's fault."

I have a hard time believing that. Dahlia could've pushed her away if she really wanted to. I only saw them kissing for a few seconds, but it looked as if they'd been at it for a while.

"Bea, please—"

"You're being absolutely ridiculous. You're in here trying to make a move on me because you're hurt because you think Dahlia cheated when it's clear that she didn't, and even if she did, what exactly would kissing me help? Would it make you guys even? Would it make you feel better? No. Not at all. It'd just make the situation even worse. Dahlia's my friend now and I'm not gonna do that to her. If you wanna make the situation more complicated and kiss someone, you're gonna have to find someone else."

I huffed as I sat back on her bed and crossed my own arms. I came here last night because I thought Dahlia might go back to our room, and I hadn't slept all night. I just kept thinking about what Dahlia did and how I could get back at her. I figured that I'd just get Bea to make out with me again whenever she woke up, but clearly, that isn't happening.

"You're supposed to be my friend, not Dahlia's." I muttered.

"I am your friend. That's why I'm not gonna help you fuck this shit up," She rolled her eyes. "If you'd just stayed and listened to her I'm sure she would've explained what happened and all this shit would've been solved in just a matter of minutes. It's not too late to find her and listen now, though. I strongly suggest you do that."

"I don't wanna listen to any of her bullshit. She cheated on me and that's that."

"Why are you so convinced that she cheated on you? Does that seem like something Dahlia would do?"

"Maybe when she's drunk." I grumbled, remembering the whole Kai situation. Bea sent me a look. "You two weren't officially together then. Now you are and she hasn't done anything like that since you guys became girlfriends."

"Except last night. Just two months in."

"Dude...I think you're just looking for a reason to push Dahlia away at this point. You and I both know that she didn't cheat on you. You let Luna continue to hang around her despite the fact that you knew she liked her. Now you're in here trying to kiss me. You're just scared because the relationships getting serious. Your feelings for her are getting stronger and you're scared."

I stayed silent as I looked down and began to play with my rings. I don't know how she knew, but I think she's spot on.

Dahlia and I have known each other for less than a year and I'm already obsessed with her. I really liked Luna. I loved Luna. But my feelings for her don't even begin to compare to how I feel about Dahlia.

I feel so damn stupid, though. I'm moving way too fast and I'm scared I'll scare her off if I tell her how I really feel about her.

I wish I didn't feel this way. I wish I didn't always fall so damn hard.

"If you wanna slow things down, you can tell her that," Bea said softly. "I'm sure she'd understand. But if you don't want to slow things down, I'm sure she wouldn't mind that either. Just talk to her."

"You're right and I hate you." I rolled my eyes. She grinned as she threw the covers off of her and stood up. "I always am. Anyways, get the fuck out. I have to take a shower and cry."

I frowned as she walked toward her suitcase to find some clothes. I was so damn worried about myself that I didn't even think about Bea's feelings. I just flat out told her about Luna and Dahlia and then tried to make a move on her. I didn't even think about the fact that I was hurting Bea's feelings. She really seemed to like Luna.

"I'm so sorry, Bea. I shouldn't have told you about Luna like that. I'm such a dick."

"It's okay. I like having the bandage ripped off anyway." She shrugged, smiling tearfully. "I feel pretty stupid, but I'll bounce back."

"I need to talk to Dahlia, but after I do would it be cool if I came back in here? We could watch movies all day."

"That would be nice," She smiled. "Thanks, Bil."

"No, thank you." I sighed as I stood up and went over to give her a hug. "I'm really glad we're friends."

"I'm sure you are. I am the best."

***

I was kinda surprised to see Dahlia sitting there when I opened the door to our room. I thought she might be in the twins' room or something.

"Hi." I mumbled.

"I realize you're supposed to be mad at me for supposedly cheating on you or whatever, but I'm pretty damn mad myself. So, let's argue." She stood up quickly, her eyes narrowing as I slowly closed the door.

"I guess I understand you not trusting me, given the fact that your ex was a cheating ass bitch, but the fact that you decided to test me was so stupid. Like...I can't put into words how stupid that was. Instead of talking to me about how you felt, instead of telling me about your worries, instead of communicating with me like people in a relationship should, you decided it'd be better to let me hang around a bitch that you knew wanted me and see if I'd get with her. I'm so fucking pissed, Billie, oh my god. If I'd known she felt like that I would've distanced myself from her! That's not even the icing on the cake, though, is it? No, the icing on the fucking cake is you getting pissed at me because a bitch you knew liked me made a fucking move on me. Make it make sense, Billie Eilish. It's like me getting mad at a monkey for eating a banana that I put in front of it! Why the fuck—"

She stopped talking as I let out a small laugh. She clenched her jaw and sent me a mean look and I just shook my head before walking toward the bed.

"Is this fucking funny to you?" She glowered.

"I'm not laughing at you, I'm laughing at me," I told her as I sat down. "I'm ridiculous. I ruin everything good. I love you."

"I—You—What?"

"I love you. And I'm really sorry about that, by the way."

"Why the fuck are you sorry? What the fuck do you mean?"

"I don't think I should love you this early on, but I do. I'm sorry if that freaks you out. It freaks me out a lot too." I mumbled.

"Billie..." She smiled before sighing and coming to sit next to me. She grabbed my hand and looked at me before shaking her head. "I...I've never been with someone that I could love, and I don't know what it's like. I don't...I don't wanna say this at all, but I don't know if I love you. It's not bad that you love me! I just don't know what my feelings are. I'm really sorry. I just don't wanna say something I don't mean, you know?"

"I totally get it." I smiled. And I was telling the truth too. I'm not even hurt that she doesn't know if she loves me back or not. I'm happy she told me the truth instead of telling me she loved me without really knowing.

She leaned over and kissed me softly. The kiss was slow and sweet and so relieving. I'm glad this fight didn't last that long. I'm glad I had that talk with Bea.

"We haven't officially made up until at least one of us gets eaten out, you know?" Dahlia smirked, pushing me backward.

"Maybe we should fight more often."