Him and I

We lay on the bed, entangled with one another. I hold his hand, tracing it's dips and curves. His arms wrap around me, tightly, assuringly, healing the loneliness that had etched itself on me. We couldn't say anything, we didn't want to say anything because words made it real, they affirmed our greatest fears, forced us to think of a solution. We didn't want to think, we'd been thinking all our lives.

"If you could live in any moment for the rest of your life, When would you live?" I whisper, tilting my head toward him.

His eyes, half-lidded and red, stay with me, his aching soul searching for salvation. "When I saw you in that bookstore, I thought time, for all its cruel tricks and hurt, had finally rewarded me. Everything was planned to the littlest detail until... You. You, with your firey gaze and magnetising disposition, rendered me helpless. I felt weak. Life was reduced to nothing but the flutter of your eyes and the tilt of your lip. You threw my world off it's axis, Eleanor, and its still spinning. When you walked into that lecture hall... God, my heart beat so fast I could hardly breathe. No one had ever made me feel so exposed, I hated it. I fought it."

I had made him feel like that?

He didn't hate me. He hated that he couldn't hate me. My brows rise in amusement, in wonder. He smiles at me.

"When I first met you, I was barely hanging on. Did you know that?" I say, unsure of what else I'll admit. He just looks at me, listening intently. "You lit up the cold, dark hollowness within me with a blazing fire. I never wanted to admit it to myself but you, Silas, saved me. I held onto the light you sparked with everything in me and I still am. I'd convinced myself that I loathed you and yet, I'd look for that infuriating smirk everywhere I went. Without meaning to, I began to rely on you and I fought it, until I couldn't anymore. Unwittingly, I allowed the gates of my heart melt down to the heat of your flame."

His forehead rests on mine, "I guess we're both fools then."

I let out a laugh, hands holding his neck as he brings his finger to my face, tilting my chin upward to meet his lips.

"Search every blasted inch of this place. I want that bastard found before nightfall." Howls an eerily familiar voice. We whip our heads to the command, scrambling to the ground to hide.

"Fuck." Silas curses, peering out the window. "It's Hart."

Everything replays in my head. The night at the station, the burning house- the documents. Sonders read them.

They know its Silas.

"We have to leave, now. They know it's you, Silas." I whisper sharply.

He balls his fists in frustration, manically concocting a plan. "Alright, alright."

Ducking under the windows, he used his elbows to writhe toward me. I grasp the edge of the bedside table to prop myself up a little, looking out the other window to count the number of officers searching the camping grounds.

I signal him to the back door and he nods, approaching warily. "Run toward the blue cabin with the boat upfront, knock and say I sent you."

"What? No, what about you?" I question, grabbing the edges of his shirt.

"I've always loved watching Hart fall flat on his face. Let's see how badly they want me." He whispers, a wicked smile creeping up. "Dont worry, my love. I'll find you. You know I will."

Before he utters another word, I pull him by his shirt, lips hovering above his. "Don't die just yet."

His eyes study me intently as he drags his thumb over my mouth. "How can I? When only you can kill me."

His palm trails down my back, my waist, lingering there for a moment before he pulls away, slipping through the back door and running opposite of the scattered officers.

Within seconds, gunshots fire in the air. A sign. A distraction.

"What was that?!" Yells one. A mess of confused and fearful voices sound.

"All units south of the grounds! Now!" Barks Hart.

That's my cue. The second I see movement away from my line of sight, I bolt out of the door. Without another thought, I sprint deeper into the woods. Breathlessly, I search for a blue cabin. The trees grew taller and more threatening the closer I got, it's branches casting a shadow as it hid the sun.

"Hart! I think I see something here." A female voice announces, paralysing me in my spot.

Scratchy with static, Hart responds. "Check it out, Sanchez. Radio in if you need back up."

I clasp the trunk of the nearest tree and launch myself behind it, clutching my mouth to silence the heavy breathing.

I battle the heavy beats of my heart to listen to where her footsteps lead her. She nears to the tree I hide behind. As she comes closer, I dig my nails into the bark and tip-toe around it.

One step, clear. Two steps, clear. In my periphery, I see her lower her armed hand. I take a short breathe-

I lose my footing and stumble, a branch snapping loudly, jabbing foot.

Shit.

"Whose there?" A cautious voice asks.

I bite my lip to smother the whimper of pain that tugs at me. The sharpness of the twig digs into my skin and I am all too aware of the tenderness of the wound as warm blood trickles down.

Leaves crunch beneath her boots, "Come out, now! You're surrounded by-"

Just as her threats begin, the radio sounds. "Sanchez, do you copy? We have an injured officer. Report back immediately."

She mumbles a reply that I barely hear as I ball my fists in pain. I see her figure withering away into the distance when I let out a grunt and force myself off the tree, hobbling forward.

I inhale deeply to centre myself. I have to get to that cabin.

Listening carefully, I hear sounds of gushing water in the distance.

Where there's water, there are boats.

I shove down the throbbing pain, forcing myself toward the sound.

The sky bleeds into a burnt orange, strokes of pink and purple follow in suit, preparing for night.

Within moments, the river Thames reveals itself. I speed up to a blue cabin with a small motorboat attached to a car. I let out a sigh of relief, limping toward the door.

"Help!" I yell, knocking and twisting the handle, helplessly.

The door flings open to reveal a stubby, young man. "What is this?!" He gasps, hooking his arms under mine and helping me onto a chair inside.

"Golding sent you?" He whispers, whipping his head from side to side as he hurriedly shuts the blinds and locks the doors.

I nod my head, nauseous as droplets of sweat stream down my face.

He twists open the tap, filling a cup with gushing water.

"Here." He says, passing it to me.

I gulp it down with one hand and with the other, grip my thigh to distract from the throbbing pain shooting up my leg.

"Do have a first aid kit?" I ask in between sharp breathes.

"Right, yes." He leaves for a moment before reappearing with a kit in his hands.

I grab my calf, pulling it up to rest on my knee. I double over in pain, the wound, red and tender as a large splinter sticks out.

"Do you need help?" The man asks worriedly, unsure of what to do.

Biting my lip, I wave him away. I hold my heel tightly, bracing myself before I pinch the edge of the stick and yank it out.

I stifle the whimper of pain that escapes me. Lightheaded, I grab the gauze and spill the remaining water from my cup on it, cleaning the blood. I pull out the bandage and wrap it around my foot.

Sighing a breath of relief, I melt into the seat.

~~~

"Load the car, Oscar."

Hushed whispers pull me awake.

"I didn't agree to any of this, Silas! Do you hear me?! I just wanted some money. I thought it was going to be a simple job but now you want me to hide from cops? No. I'm out." The other halts at the door.

"How long are you going to be a coward, Oscar?" Silas questions, unlocking the barrel of a gun and reloading it before swiftly tucking it under his shirt.

"What's going on?" I rasp, their heads jerk toward me.

"We need to leave." Silas asserts, walking toward me. I stand up to meet him, stabbing pain pushing me back down.

He catches my back with an arm, stabilising me. "Hey, hey, what happened?"

"I'm fine. Where are we going? What happened with the police?" I say, looking up at him, moonlight reflecting in his dark eyes. I pull my hands off his chest, limping outside.

"Every inch of Oxford is swarming with them. We need to leave the city, tonight." He explains, following me out to the car.

"Then what are we waiting for?" I reply, opening the car door.

"There's just one thing." He says, reaching his arm to close the door as he looks down at me. "I can't come in that car with you. Oscar's going to drive you to the abandoned helipad past the airport and I'll meet you there."

Before I ask why, it dawns on me. "The main roads are being monitored."

He nods. "I have to take another route, find some other way."

"No! No, I'm not doing anything." Oscar's refusal steals our attention.

"Get in the car, Eleanor." He says, opening the door.

I slip in as he seals it shut. "I don't do threats, Oscar. So, I promise you if anything happens to her," He pulls out his gun and holds it against his head. "I will empty every bullet in your head."

Oscar stares him down for a moment. Giving up, he scurries to the other side of the car, entering into the driver's seat as he mumbles something. Sticking the key into the ignition, the car rumbles as I look out the window, Silas holds the roof with an arm as he looks back- so much swirls deep in his eyes,  Fear? Hope? Whatever it was, I felt it too. Driving off, I watch as his figure grows smaller and smaller with the distance.

That's it.

It was him and I, come what may.