Chapter 236

#Chapter 26 Too much on his shoulders William POV “You haven’t been acting like yourself, William.” Waylon, his wolf. said inside him.

“You know why. Don’t pretend I want to be like this.” William sneered.

“Don’t you think you’ve been a little hard on your mate recently?” Waylon said. William sat on the edge of the bed while Doris slept soundly behind him.

“What do you mean?” William raked his fingers through his hair that just wouldn’t say calm. “I just took her out to dinner—“

“T can feel her uncertainty around you when you push her away—“

“You are the one that told me a father needs alone time with his infant son to bond.” William growled.

“You told me that these months are the most important in his life to bond with his parents. I’ve carved out every minute I can for him to be alone with me.”

William didn’t need to remind his wolf what happened with his own father. After his mother died, he pushed William away at such a young age and never once tried to bond with him again. And all the years since, William felt that pain set deep inside him like a wound that just wouldn’t heal. William was not about to let that happen with his own son. His son would know he was loved.

It was a strange thing being a father. All the feelings he had before he met Doris were gone, and permanently destroyed when Alec came. He didn’t care for women that batted their lashed at him anymore. The only thing on his mind was his son and lady.

“«.... admit I was wrong about the maid situation.” William grumbled. He glanced back at Doris to see her beautiful face sound asleep. William leaned across the bed to brush her hair from her face lightly.

He knew he had to get up soon and deal with the kingdom business—but he wanted a few moments more to savor this moment.

“You let your pride keep you from truly making it up to her.”

“T apologized—“

“Sometimes apologies aren’t enough, William. You know that.” Waylon said calmly.

“She knows I love her. Look at everything I did to get her here with me. I tore through villages and brought down everything in my path to keep her safe. And now she is going to be my queen soon.”

William stood from the bed and went to look at a sound asleep Alec.

“Just because you feel that you’ve proved your love in the past, doesn’t mean our mate doesn’t like being reminded. If you keep pushing her to the side and expecting her to be your punching bag, you’re going to wake up alone.”

William curled his hands into fists at his sides. Doris would never leave him. She loved him—she understood that he had a lot on his shoulders. He didn’t mean to push her aside and blame her for things, he didn’t even realize he was doing it half the time.

It felt good to put his anger on someone instead of bottling it up but he didn’t realize until it was too late that it wasn’t the right thing to do. He was still working on that part of himself since he became a father.

William fixed Alec’s blanket before he unlocked their balcony and stepped out for some fresh air. The sun hadn't fully peaked over the mountains yet, but the sky was lightening faster than he liked.

“I feel as if I worked my entire life to get where I’m at. And now that I have all that I wanted... I don’t know how to feel anymore.” William admitted. It was rare for him to become vulnerable with anyone, but his wolf knew every part of him. “I thought I would have my brothers by my side when I was younger. I used to imagine that Martin would see that I was better fit for this and he would be there to give advice or just... be there when I was uncertain.”

“You feel alone as king.” Waylon said. William rolled his eyes to the sky. “Don’t make me sound weak.”

He growled. He wasn’t weak—he was far from it and he didn’t have to lift a finger to prove that. “I’m trying to make the right steps where my father made his wrong ones. Some days are harder than others.”

William sighed. He was once known as reckless to this kingdom. He was a prince that had nothing on his shoulders to weigh him down and got everything he wanted without having to work for it—at least in the outsiders eye.

He swore he wouldn’t be that prince anymore when the crown was placed on his head. He swore he wouldn’t be reckless and put his kingdom at risk now that it was all his responsibility. He used to act on his emotions instead of thinking things through—kings didn’t let their anger drive them. He couldn’t punch a villager for disagreeing with him or ban a servant because they looked at him the wrong way.

Everyone calculated his every move when they used to ignore him.

They wanted to see if he could grow to be the king they needed. And they didn’t need a reckless prince even when that part still thrived inside him.

His possessive, reckless side still existed for his family even when he tried to shove it down. They ignited it in him like nothing else ever could. He knew that he wouldn’t hesitate to burn down a building to get to them or tear out a hundred throats. it hummed to remind him that they would always be his weakness.

“Perhaps it is time to let her join you by your side in your meetings.” Waylon said.

“i don’t like the way they look at her as if she knows nothing. It makes me want to strangle the life out of them. I almost lost it when they tried to call her a liar and I realized what they were doing. I took out my anger on her when I should have banned them then.” William gripped the railing until his knuckles turned white. “I need her to stay away from the rulers of Eldon. I don’t trust them and I know she will see right through them and speak her mind. I need them to think that we don’t suspect a thing.”

“How much longer will you allow them to stay?”

“Not much longer.” William said and glanced back towards his room. “J still have a lot to do before they go. I know what they want from me and this kingdom, but I want something from them that they won’t expect to lose.”

Waylon chuckled inside him. “Are you going to let Doris in on your plans?”

“I will when the time is right. I can’t risk anyone overhearing us and lately I’ve felt as if every room I’m in is being listened in on. It puts me on edge.” William sighed and shrugged on his coat. “I’m not worried about her keeping my secrets, I’m worried that someone will try to force them out of her if they think she knows something.”

“You’re lucky to have a mate like her. Don’t wreck this for us, William. Be careful how you play this game.” Waylon warned.

William glanced back at Doris as she shifted in her sleep. “I would go through hell to keep her at my side and rip apart this planet to find her if she ever left. Don’t doubt my love for her.”

“It is not me that doubts it. I can sense her sadness when you leave.”

“Once these rulers are dealt with, she will be my main focus again. Until then, I know she understands that I have something to deal with. If I do this right, I could become the king of two kingdoms and her my queen. But only if I do it right. One wrong move could lose me this kingdom and make an enemy of one that has more allies than I do. She knows I love her.” William stepped out the door and had four guards already on his heel. “She might not understand why I act this way now, but she will learn it was worth it in the end.”

Waylon hummed. “J think she only cares that you are by her side, not what kingdoms are yours.”

William silenced his wolf just as he stepped into his first meeting for the day.