sixteen

Alice Jones

It felt like my head would explode any moment as I walked out of the classroom. It's done. I did it. I'm done with my finals. Now I just have to wait for the results.

Mom, I did it. All for you. I hope you're proud of me.

I didn't even notice that tears started rolling down my eyes, shit.

I sprinted towards the restroom and locked myself up in one of the stalls. Calm down, Alice. Calm down.

I heard the door of the restroom opening, two female voices laughing. "She seems to be such a slut. Saw her making out with Caddle and Anderson." Suddenly everything around me stopped.

Are they talking about...me?

No way. This can't be. "Who's she anyway. She just came, got Mrs. Adams favorite and fucks the most handsome boys at our school."

I hear the other girl scoffing. "Such a slut." The tears that just stopped rolling down my cheeks started flooding my cheeks down this time.

I held a hand in front of my mouth to muffle my whimpers and sobs. The door fell shut and shortly after I was ugly crying in that stall.

Is this how they all think about me? Is this how Tyler thinks about me? My friends? Do they know I hooked up with Tyler?

My body rushed hot and cold, hot and cold in seconds. I lifted myself from the toilet, wiping my tear flooded cheeks. Okay, you'll just go home immediately.

I took deep breaths and left the restroom. My steps fast as I walked towards our big doors. Maybe I should be forgotten for some days.

I made my way out of the school building and onto the streets. Making my way home.

And who would've thought I'd lay in bed with fever all week. I threw up twice today, cheeks burning red, dark circles under my eyes because of the lag of sleep and coughing like crazy.

I think I got the flu or something. There's a soft knock on my door before my aunt walks in. "Hey, I made you a soup." She smiles softly as she places the bowl onto the night stand.

"Thank you but I don't know if I'm able to eat it." I smile softly, she sits down on the edge of the bed, her eyes scanning my face. "I'm so sorry, darling." She runs a soothing hand over my head.

I close my eyes, enjoying her soft touch on me. She reminded me of my mother so much. It felt scary sometimes because I saw my mother sitting in front of me instead of her.

"Will you be fine if me and your cousin go to that event tomorrow evening?" I nod. "Of course, I'll be fine. Go and enjoy yourselves." She gently gets up from my bed.

"Thank you. Try and eat something. I'll leave you alone." She smiles softly, closing the door behind her.

Everything's so messed up. I keep having weird fever dreams. About Tyler and about school. Them hating me, them lying to me and betraying me and them pretending to be my friends.

It all seemed so messed up. I haven't replied to Cassie's messages or Tyler's calls. I didn't even text them I felt sick and had been staying home all week.

____________________

I thought the day after would be the day I'd feel better but I slept all day after my lack of sleep over all these nights.

Susen and Brian left for their event an hour ago but I kinda slept through it and didn't notice them leaving.

It was raining heavily outside, slight summer rain and the sky was painted in pretty pink and orange tones as I looked outside the window.

My cheeks were burning again. I could swear my fever kicked in again. Forehead sticky with sweat. Please let this end. I'm tired.

My eyes slowly started growing heavy again. I wanted to sleep forever and never wake up again. Never go to school again, never see Tyler and the other again and never face anyone again.

Everyone knows I'm a slut now, right? The one who fucked the handsome guys in school. Such a slut... My breath hitched in my throat, thinking about what these girls said.

I quickly drifted off to sleep my mind immediately returning to my weird dreams.

"Why would I want to talk to you?" Tyler spits out as he stands in front of me. His eyes travelling up and down my body in disgust.

"No one wants to hang out with a slut. You tryna come back to me after you fucked my best friend? Sorry, Alice. Not working." My cheeks wet again, tears streaming down.

"But I thought we had something-" He laughed loudly. "You thought. Never happened." His finger twirled a strand of my hair around it.

"You're disgusting." He whispered only for me to hear. I almost choked on my breath. Did he really just say that?

"Fucking. Disgusti-"

I gasped, body drenched in sweat as I sit up in my bed, flinching as a thunder rumbled through the air. I looked around my room.

It was just another dream. Calm down, Alice. I flinched again when I heard the door bell ring. Is this some kind of horror movie?

I got out of bed and made my way down stairs. The door bell rang again and when I opened it I saw a tall green eyed young man stand in the doorway.

His hard expression immediately softening when he saw me, his eyes scanning my body, seeing me sweat drenched and my flushed cheeks.

"I thought you wouldn't open the door." He held his helmet in his hand, behind him his motorcycle. I stepped aside to let him in.

"Why haven't you answered my calls? I was worried sick about you." His hand ran through his hair as I closed the door behind him.

"I wasn't feeling well." His tall figure hovered over me as he placed his cold hand on my cheek. "You're fucking hot." Concern painted his face.

"Thanks, not in the mood right now." A smirk ghosted his lips. "Didn't mean it like that, gorgeous. Even though that's true too." He cupped my face with his cold hands.

"Do you have a fever?" I nod. "I've been not feeling well for a few days. Puked and stuff..."

He frowned at my words.

"Have you eaten?" I shake my head. "Did you sleep enough?" I shake my head again. "Took some medication?" My head shook again.

"God dammit, Alice. Why not?" I shrugged. Sorry, I keep having dreams about you saying I'm a slut. I can't sleep because of weird nightmares.

"You're sweating. What happened?" His hand softly ran through my hair. "I had a bad dream and stuff..." I couldn't really look at him.

"You should change or you'll not recover. You can't stay in these wet clothes." He gently gripped my chin, lifting it, forcing me to look at him.

"You're so beautiful, even when you're sick." He chuckled, his thumb rubbing my cheek.

"Come on. Let's put some fresh clothes on you." He suddenly lifted me up into his arms with ease.

"I'm too heavy, this won't work." He looked at me in disbelief. "You haven't eaten properly in days, plus, I work out for this, Alice., You're not too heavy. Shut up." Tyler carried me into my bedroom, gently placing me onto my bed.

His thumb brushed over the lamp on the night stand as he turned it on. "Stay here, I'll look into your closet."

"Why are you here?" The question came out rude. I didn't want it to sound this rude. "I was really worried because you didn't answer my calls or Cassie's texts. I thought something happened to you because you also stopped coming to school." He turned around to face me, leaning against my closet.

"And I needed to talk to you about that little adittude of yours." Right...

"I'm sorry. I really am. I just... I felt like I didn't want to continue what we had. It felt wrong."

His face softened at my words.

"You should've talked to me about your feelings. I would've excepted it, not make out with my best friend..." Please don't say it. Don't say it. Don't say it. Don't. Say. It.

He pulled something out of my closet. "If that's what you want then I'll accept it but don't ignore me like that." He sat down next to me.

"Arms up." I stopped, looking at him. "I have no bra underneath." He chuckled softly. "I don't care, Ali. I've seen you like this before. Arms up." I slowly lift my arms, allowing him to pull the wet t-shirt off me.

He gently tossed it aside and pulled the fresh one over my head and body. "There you go." His hand gently stroked some sweaty strands of hair out of my face.

"You shouldn't see me like this. I look awful." A smile tucks on his lips. "You don't. You look beautiful. Let me get you a wet towel. Where's your bathroom?" I smiled at him, he's so caring and I was a total bitch towards him...

"When you walk out of my room, left door." He nodded, getting up from the bed and leaving my room, coming back a few minutes later with a wet towel and some pain killers.

"Lay down." He softly said, placing the cool towel onto my forehead, handing me the pain killers and a glass of water.

"Take them. They'll definitely help. You shouldn't suffer like that." I kind of enjoyed the silence that suddenly happened between us and didn't say anything, gulping down the water.

"Good job, now, lay down and try to sleep." I kind of felt disappointed when he said that. He'd probably go back home, the rain stopped as well as the thunder.

"Will you go home?" He nodded, his hand playing with some of my hair. "It's getting late and me and the boys still wanted to game a bit." I nod, not really wanting to show my disappointment.

"Can you stay until I fall asleep?"

"Sure. I'll be here" My eyes fall close, exhaustion spreading through my body. I suddenly didn't want to fall asleep but my body had other plans and this time no bad dreams.

____________________

The days after I came back to school. I didn't come back because I wanted to. I came because our result from our finals came in.

"Congratulations." Mrs. Adams smiled at me, handing me the paper. "Best one in the whole year." She added. I couldn't believe it. I passed! I'd graduate. Mom, this is all for you.

"Thank you, Mrs. Adams." I smiled at her and left her office, my eyes locking on Tyler's who stood nervously in front of the office. No, I didn't go back to normally talking to him.

He'd also heard what some girls said about me. It's still hurt me, making me feel uncomfortable. Cassie told me not to listen to them but it wasn't that easy.

"And? Did you pass?" Cassie waited for me. "Yeah, best student in the whole year." I smiled and she pulled me into a hug.

I apologized for her when I came back to school. It was rude of me for not to answer.

"Didn't pass guys." Chris suddenly said, looking at his paper. "Let me see." I took the paper from his hands, my eyes scanning over it. "How did that happen?" He shrugged.

"Didn't put enough effort in it I guess. Should've taken lessons the way Anderson did." He sighed, shoving the paper into his bag. "I'm sorry." I patted his shoulder.

"What's wrong, Caddle?" I heard Tyler's voice behind me, my body tensing on the spot. "I didn't pass, man. I can't graduate with y'all." I heard Tyler curse.

"That's not what I wanted to happen. Fuck." He hugged Chris tightly. "Please tell me you passed." Chris looked at him with an curious expression on his face.

Tyler's face , light up, nodding. "Yeah, I did. I passed." The words rang in my ear. He passed. Thank god. He passed!

Two girls walked past me as they were whispering about something, immediately making me feel uncomfortable. "I'll head home now. I'm not feeling, uh, too good." Cassie looked at me worried.

"Okay, take care and text me." I nod and walk away, my stomach twisting as it felt like I had to throw up. Was I disgusted of myself?