Twenty - Five

Everyone loses something each passing day. A favourite accessory, a book or a brand new pen. From trivial things to important things. We all lose something at some point. Whether it be a coin you dropped and rolled into an unreachable corner or something of fragility that got broken. No matter how much you curse your clumsiness or stretch your arm to unreachable lengths. How many of us actually retrieve back the things we lost.

They could sulk all they wanted but it wouldn't bring back the favoured piece of item they lost. Buy a new one or just forget about it all together. That's all that needs to be done if you can't get your hands back on said item. But what happens to those who loses something irreplaceable. Something that you can't just walk into a store and buy. How do you retrieve back something that was unique and only had only one of said thing in the world? That was the difficult part. No matter how hard someone try to replace what they loss it would never be the same because whatever it was, was unique and special in its own way and no one or nothing could replace it. They could only try and fill that void while slowly forgetting only for an instant.

Scott had lost many things in his life. From his wallet to his favourite pair of jeans. Simply things that he could always buy back. There was one thing he lost and never wanted it to be found again. It was toxic and deceiving. Heart aching and meant to be left unfound. But it wasn't, it was found again. Scott was just a fool to think he had left it all in the past with no more worries.

He was losing all he had in just a mere second. A simply sentence within a second could rip away everything. Like a wave crashing to shore, pulling away all the land bear and left it bare. It was too much to for Scott to live in a world with nothing worth fighting for. Was he even willing to fight? He was too scared of what could happen. Each scenario that flashed through his mind was dreadful and did him no justice. His fear was controlling him and he felt helpless and useless. Like a man stripped of his clothes and left bare. Scott was being stripped of his love and left as the empty shell he once was.

The universe was testing him. Scott was failing the sudden pop quiz. With no time to study and with no notes in his notebook. How did he expected to pass? If he thought about it he didn't need any notes to challenge the test life threw at him. All he needed was courage and the will to not let such a hate filled person ruin his life. But there was his demons, telling him how he didn't have a chance against him. How he should just bend to his will and all would be well. How he didn't deserve Elijah's love and would only hurt him. Scott was starting to think that the voices in his head was.....right.

He didn't know how long he was in his room for after that night. He's lost his sense of being. Scott was alive but he wasn't living. He was living with Elijah. He made Scott feel the warmth of the sun rather than the cold droplets of rain. No matter how hard he tried to forget about Elijah. Try to forget his love for him every passing aching feeling in his chest. Everything led back to Elijah and he hated it. Elijah deserved better than the weakling Scott. Elijah didn't deserve to be hurt. Scott will continue to hug himself and try not to think how he would rather be safely wrapped in Elijah's arms. How he wanted to feel his lips against his and Elijah telling him everything would be okay. He wanted Elijah to tell him how much he loved him.

If he closed his eyes tightly and force the memories out of his mind. It would all pass. Every painfully thing he felt will slowly pass like the wind.

Scott's phone was ringing once again. The very first photograph him and Elijah took flashed across the screen along with Eli. A genuine chuckle passed through Scott's lips as he hugged his knees and looked at the phone to his side. The tears were flowing again due to unforgettable moments at the sight of Elijah's face. Scott's eyes were puffy and red. He didn't know how much longer he could cry for. Elijah was calling again even though he hasn't received an answer from Scott. The countless missed calls, text and voice messages. Elijah wasn't giving up. That made Scott wondered why should he? Then he remembered how much of a trembling leaf in the wind he was. How he couldn't defy him. That was why he was sitting in his home town. He was running away and didn't even know he was being chased.

"I'm sorry" Scott said through his muffled cries. He repeated it over and over as he rocked back and forth. Scott was a mess.

A knock sounded from behind his door as it does any other day. It was likely his parents or Maddie being concerned with him. How could he tell them that he was back in town and that he was longing for Elijah knowing he could no longer have him if he wanted him to be safe. Scott dried his tears as he looked towards the door.

"Who is it?" he asked, his voice shaky, evident that he was crying.

"Maddie" he heard her reply. Scott could here the concern in her voice. "Can I come in?" She asked.

Scott didn't want that. He didn't want Maddie to see him like this. He didn't want the questions. He just wanted this painful moment to pass. Before he could mutter a 'no', his bedroom door was being flung open. It was suppose to be locked. Locking him away from anymore harshness the world had to offer. Maddie pushed herself in. There was no time for Scott to collect himself.

"What happened in here" Maddie said after closing the door behind her. Stepping over a mountain of used tissues on the floor. She had yet to look up at her older brother.

"What happened to you?" Maddie said after she locked eyes with Scott's saddened and puffy ones. "Are you okay?" She further asked, making way to Scott's messy bed.

"I'm fine" Scott replied his voice just above a whisper.

"You know I'm not going to believe that" Maddie informed him, pushing a tissue away scornfully as she took a seat.

"You should because I'm fine" Scott tried assuring her. He just wanted her to leave so he could wallow in self pity some more.

"Is it about Elijah?" Maddie said, pointing to the ever persistent Elijah who was calling Scott again.

"Please don't say his name" Scott told her. He could feel the tears welling up in his eyes. A dagger being plunged in his heart and being twisted ruthlessly by the holder. Just hearing his name was enough of a heartache for Scott.

"Did you two break up?" Maddie sent another question his way, shifting in a more comfortable spot to look at her distressed brother.

Scott didn't reply. They might as well be broken up at this point and it was all for the best. For the both of them. Maddie sat there in silence, taking Scott's silence as a yes though she could never be sure enough since Elijah was calling non-stop.

"What happened?"

"Nothing happened" Scott said, pushing his phone further away. He could always just turn it off. All he was doing was torturing himself further.

"Whose going to believe that? You've been evidently crying and you've locked yourself in your room for the last few days. Then I see Elijah calling your phone nonstop. Of course something happened Scott. You can always talk to me"

"Maddie please...."

"What happened to no secrets between us" Maddie continued ignoring her brother plead.

"Maddie"

"I hate seeing you like this" Maddie said. "I want to help you."

"Could you shut up for a minute" Scott snapped, his sadness was being morphed into anger at Maddie ignoring the fact that he was not up to talking about his problems right now.

"Scott"

He knew his younger sister was just concerned for him. Scott just wanted to be alone for just a bit more. "We aren't some siblings who share everything that happens in each other life" Scott said, regretting each word as it slipped out his lips but he couldn't stop. He was frustrated. "You've kept things from me for years Maddie. You've been.....with Mikey of all people."

"You don't get to do that Scott" Maddie replied, getting up and facing Scott. "You don't get to throw my mistake in my face. I told you because I knew you would be there for me not because of this" Scott could see the tears forming in her eyes. "Carly's here to see you. I'll send her up" Maddie wiped away a tear. "We'll talk when your not going to belittle me" with that Maddie left.

Scott was feeling even worst with himself. First Elijah then his sister. He didn't mean to say those things. His mind wasn't inline with his heart. Scott knew Maddie didn't regret her choices and he was making her feel that way. She loved Simon and if Mikey was a better man then she would allow him in her life and Simon's. Scott ran his hand up and down his face in frustration. Things were going downhill for him and he hated it. He felt like he did before he moved back home. Alone in his apartment wondering what life had in store for him.

A knock came from behind his door again. This time he knew it was Carly. What could she possible wanted to talk to Scott about. Could it be about Elijah since they were both friends. Everything just went back to Elijah even though Scott didn't want it to.

"Come in" he muttered. Getting up off his bed. He looked like a mess and felt like a mess.

Carly soon emerged from behind the door. She looked better than the last time Scott saw her. The dark circles under her eyes were disappearing and her short hair was left flowing on her shoulders. Carly looked around the room, wondering what storm had passed by. Carly gave Scott a weak smile, holding onto her bag as if it was her life.

"Hey" she greeted, sending a wave Scott's way.

"Hi" Scott replied weakly.

"I want to talk to you about something but it could wait if you're not doing so well" Carly said, seeing Scott's distress. Who couldn't?

"No, I'm good. If it's about Elijah then--" Scott found himself squeezing his eyes shut at the calling of his name.

"This has nothing to do with Elijah" Carly waved a dismissive hand. Scott chew on the inside of his bottom lip. Did he wanted Carly to be here for Elijah. He's stopped by a few times but Scott refused to meet him. He couldn't find it in himself. "I'm here to talk with you about something else. About Clover"

Scott felt his breath caught in his throat. The trembling of his fingers as his eyes met Carly's, "H-How did you....how did you know about that?"

"I'm a journalist, it's my job to know" Carly replied, reaching in her bag for something. Handing Scott a photograph.

"Where did you get this" Scott looked between the photograph and Carly. There he was, standing in all his glory.

"I took it" Carly sat on the chair situated around Scott's desk. "As I figured, you know him don't you" Scott could only nod.

"Why did you want to talk to me?" Scott gripped the photograph until his knuckles turn white.

"Where should I start" Carly allowed her bag to fall to the floor. "It all begun with Mrs. Hampton. No, that's not it" Carly corrected. "It all started the moment you came back home."  Scott knitted his brow in confusion. Where was Carly getting at.

"Did you know the night Mrs. Hampton died it was all a mistake. " Everyone in town knew the guy panicked and did the unthinkable resulting in Mrs. Hampton death. "Not just a robbery gone wrong" Carly added, making Scott all the more puzzled.

"That night, the guy was suppose to pay you a visit Scott. He just got the wrong house and delivered the wrong message"

"Why would he want to sneak into my house?" Scott asked. Knowing he was the cause of Mrs. Hamptons dead made his heart plunge into further darkness.

"To tell you Clover was here in town" Carly said. "Which now made me ask, What do you know about him? Why is he here?"

"Does Elijah know about this?"

"No he doesn't" Carly told him. Elijah was always the first to hear about Carly's lead in a story. Today Scott got a early visit before Elijah.

"C-Can you not tell him about any of this" Scott requested. "I'll tell you what I know about him"

"I won't tell him but he's going to find out at one point"

Scott didn't want that. He didn't want someone else to get hurt because of him. Not Elijah.