Chapter 233

Megan 5- Will or won’t I have trouble getting out of bed on my own wedding day. I was up late with Darrien, cleaning up the mess Bellamy made in the kitchen. I think he’s been in his office pretty much all night, although I heard him stomping up the stairs a few minutes ago. I quickly shower and let Lauran in. She is awesome at hair and makeup and agreed to help us get ready today. Only a few minutes after she arrives, Ryan turns up. Early, which is odd for her. Particularly since I know she had a late night. I hug her and immediately drag her into getting ready. She looks as tired as I feel so Lauran has her work cut out for her.

Hours later, our hair and makeup are done and I’m struggling to button my dress. I call Ryann in to help. She seems to be struggling with something. She looks conflicted and she’s opened her mouth to say something at least three times.now then not gone through with it.

Ry? What is it? It is because of my brother again? He messaged earlier, he’s already headed down to the hall.” I feel bad for making her deal with him and I still feel like their fight is kind of my fault.

“No, for once this has nothing to do with him, well not directly anyway. I… I wanted to tell you something, but I’m worried about how you’re going to react.” Well that doesn’t sound good. She isn’t pulling out of the wedding is she?

“What is it?” We head back into my room and she clutches my hand tightly. I can tell that she’s shaking and it’s making me even more nervous.

“You shouldn’t get married today.” She blurts out.

“Tristan isn’t your fate. He’s already met the person he’s fated to be with but it isn’t you. The reason your brother bought me here was to try and get more information on him and to confirm what he already suspected because he doesn’t trust Tristan. They’re fated to be enemies. I was there the day Tristan proposed and because you’re meant to be my friend I wrote you a note telling you that he isn’t right for you and left it in your bag, but you didn’t find it. Bellamy did. We wanted to get proof about Tristan, find some kind of evidence that he’s doing something wrong which is why neither of us said anything to you, but we haven’t been able to. So now there’s nothing else I can do but to ask you, beg you, to please trust me.

He isn’t the one for you. I’m so sorry I waited this long to say something. I should have told you from the start but I was so.caught up in my own emotions I just didn’t know what to do.”

Megan 5- Will or won’t I need a second to process this. I pull away from Ryann and start to pace. I’m upset that she didn’t tell me this. But I’m more upset that I’m not… more upset. I think deep down I knew that Tristan isn’t right for me, why else would I be getting so jealous of Ryann and Bellamy, at least I was before they were fighting. No, if anything, I feel relieved. I couldn’t admit it to myself but I’ve wanted to end things with Tristan for a while but I couldn’t think of a single good REASON. Ryann has finally given me one. I keep my back to her when I ask, feeling a little ashamed of myself.

“Ryann, did you ever wonder why I haven’t asked you about my own thread or fate?”

“I always assumed it was because you were already sure of Tristan.” I whirl and face her.

“That’s the same thing that I told myself. That I didn’t need to ask because I already knew. But, that’s not true. I never asked because I was scared you would say what you just said. That you would tell me I’ve messed up, wasted the last year and a half of my life on a man who isn’t right for me. He is just so perfect, we’ve never fought or yelled at each other. Everything has always been so easy with him.” I sigh. I should have known better. Nothing is that easy. It was only easy because I don’t care enough to argue. I suspect he doesn’t either.

“No one has ever said anything negative about him, until this moment I couldn’t think of a single reason why I might not be in love with him. I’ve been perfectly comfortable.” I collapse backwards into my bed, suddenly exhausted..

“But watching you and Bellamy, I’ve been starting to think that’s a problem. Comfortable is good, great even. But comfortable doesn’t challenge me, doesn’t encourage me to be better. I’ve been thinking that never fighting might not be a sign of compatibility but rather a signi that there is no passion, for anything, including each other.” Ryann is staring at me in shock. I suppose she expected a different reaction.

“What are you going to do?” She asks.

“I’m done lying to myself. I need to tell Tristan I can’t get married today. It’s going to be hard. I’d be lying if I said I don’t care about him. Ten minutes ago I had every intention of marrying him. I guess I just needed… permission. Permission to change my mind. Or maybe just support to do what I want.” I confess.

“What can I do to help?” Ryann immediately offers and I appreciate her so much.

Megan 5- Will or won’t “Help me out of this dress? It definitely sends the wrong message. Then we need to get over to the wedding so I can apologise to Tristan. Could you maybe call Bellamy, let him know?” 1 say thoughtlessly then immediately regret it.

“Never mind, I can do that 1-” She interrupts me.

“I can call him.” She tells me firmly. I let out a sigh of relief. Finally, it looks like things are changing. No more being stuck in this endless loop of nothing.

Bellamy returns and Ryann heads out to speak with him. I take a minute to compose myself. I have no idea what I’m going to say to Tristan, or to everyone else for that matter. They are probably all waiting for me already. I step into the hall and I take a minute to lecture Bellamy. He couldn’t have mentioned something sooner? With my brother and my best friend at my side, I head to my wedding. We pause at the doors.

“Wait here? I think I need to do this myself.” Bellamy looks unhappy with this plan, but after a glance at Ryann he agrees.

“Well, here I go.” I slip through the doors, trying not to draw attention to myself. I’d like a chance to tell Tristan without everyone watching, but I’m not that lucky. The door squeaks. and everyone turns to look at me. One look at my casual clothes artd they know something is wrong. I freeze up in the doorway as I see the horror and disappointment on everyone’s faces. Maybe I should have had Ryann and Bellamy come with me. Just one person. I just need one person to look supportive. I look around the room until my eyes land on Darrien. We make eye contact and he doesn’t look horrified like everyone else. He just gives me a sad smile and nods his head. I let out a sigh of relief. I can do this. I hurry down the aisle to where Tristan is waiting for me..

“I’m so sorry Tristan. But… I can’t do this. Can we go somewhere and talk?” I ask. I expect him to be upset, or angry. I don’t expect him to react violently. He lashes out and before I can react, he smacks me across the face, making me stumble back a few steps. Darrien is at my side in a second and growling angrily. I glare at Tristan.

“Stand down.” I order, putting every bit of dominance I have behind the words. But dammit, he might not be my soul mate, but he is my equal in dominance. He stares back at me defiantly and I can feel the pressure as we both stare at each other. Neither one of us willing to give.