Lesson #7: Act Like it Doesn't Hurt

"Today is the day," Derek reminded me with one of his proud smiles. I wasn't sure why he was so proud, or why he was in my room at seven in the morning, but here he was, wide awake and full of freaking joy. "Try outs for lacrosse are after school. Are you ready?"

I yawned, still tired from just having woken up thirty minutes ago. "How did you even get in my house?" I complained, changing my shirt as I turned away from him. I hadn't forgotten about try outs, nor was I any happier about them today than I was last week when Derek told me about them.

"Your dad let me in," he answered nonchalantly. "I just told him I was a friend of yours and he sent me up here." Great, now my dad was letting just anyone into my room. What if Derek had been a freaking murderer? I'd be dead. I almost would have rather been dead at that point. "Stiles, why do you seem so depressed? The plan is running smoothly."

I shrugged, putting all of my things into my backpack as Derek crossed his arms. "I'm just a little nervous about today. And maybe the plan is running smoothly, but how do we know it's working? I haven't even gotten a glance from Lydia in the hallway."

Derek rolled his eyes, which were still glued to me when I turned around to face him again. "You're doing everything right," he assured me. "If this plan doesn't go accordingly, I'll owe you. Whatever you want. A different girlfriend, a hundred bucks, whatever you want."

"If it doesn't work out with Lydia, I want to publicly be your friend," I said, though I probably should have put more thought into what I wanted. He had already given me so much and spent so much time and money on me, what else was there? If we were friends in public, I'd be popular too. "Not just to get Lydia, but so people don't just see me as a loser anymore."

Derek grinned, shaking his head. "So you want to use me for my popularity, huh?"

I was clearly joking, and Derek knew that, so I went with it. "What else are you good for?" I teased, trying not to fall over while putting on my socks standing up. Derek came to my rescue, offering his side to hold me up, despite me having just insulted him. "What would I do without you?"

Derek laughed as I put on my shoes, still holding me up. "Still be a loser, that's for sure."

"Not cool yet," I reminded him, shoving him to the side after getting my shoes on. Apparently, he didn't appreciate that, because he tried tackling me to the ground. I was getting real tired of him using his multi-sport thing to one-up me and knock me over. Luckily, I held my ground this time, so we just ended up pushing each other. In reality, Derek was stronger, but I had a feeling he was going easy on me. What finally got him off my ass was my dad flinging the door open, breaking us apart. "Dad, what's up?"

He stared at us for a moment, as if deciding what was going on. "I was going to see if you boys had time for breakfast before you left for school?"

"Actually," Derek interrupted, before I could say yes. I was always down for food. "I've got breakfast in the car for both of us. But maybe another time? I appreciate the offer, Sheriff." He was so damn polite, it made me want to roll my eyes.

Dad smiled, but he still seemed to be confused about something. Maybe because Derek was a new friend and who would have thought I'd ever make new friends? I couldn't blame him for the confusion. "Next time, then," he agreed, giving Derek a head nod before closing the door behind him to leave.

After he was gone, I got the rest of my things, still trying to figure out why Derek would have bought me breakfast. "You brought me breakfast?" I asked, just to make sure I heard him correctly. I flung my backpack on, staring at him as he smiled. "Why are you smiling? You're freaking me out."

"I stopped by the bakery this morning before coming over here. I thought it might be a good pick-me-up for you since today is a big day." He seemed so sincere, which made my stomach feel all fluttery for some reason. He was too sweet to be in with the popular crowd, who were all assholes by the way.

I pushed away all the weird, unfamiliar feelings, but let the smile go, because there was no holding it back. "You're so sweet, Derek," I said jokingly, though I sort of meant it.

"Only for you," he teased, bumping my shoulder with his. "Now let's go, so we can eat before class starts." I followed him downstairs and out to his car, sliding into the passenger side. We still had about fifteen minutes before we had to leave for school, so I figured I'd eat breakfast with him in his car, then take my own to school. That way, no one would be able to see us hanging out.

Derek handed me a Styrofoam box which clearly had a cinnamon roll inside because it was hard to mistake the smell of  a cinnamon roll for anything else. "That smells amazing," I mumbled, gratefully taking it from him. He handed me a fork before I could start devouring it with my hands, which would have made me look like a fool, but it just smelled and looked so good!

Derek waited until my mouth was full before talking, knowing I wouldn't be able to reply right away. "So, you want a ride to school?" he asked, giving me a sly grin. I almost spit my food out, but I restrained, instead swallowing the huge bite in my mouth with a grimace. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Why would you give me a ride to school?" I retorted, turning in the passenger seat to face him better. "You don't want people at school to see us together."

"I'll park in the back," he shrugged. "If anybody asks, I'll come up with something. Don't worry." He tried to give me a reassuring look, but it didn't help me. I was already stressed about tryouts after school, and now Derek was offering me a ride. Things just kept getting weirder with him and I couldn't figure out what I wanted to do about it. I didn't want him getting the wrong idea about our professional relationship, but I also wanted to be friends with him. He was fun to be around, but I didn't want our relationship getting in the way of my future relationship with Lydia. "Come on, put your seat belt on."

I sighed, giving in because there wasn't much of an option. "Fine," I mumbled, clicking my seat belt into place. Derek finished shoving his cinnamon roll into his mouth, drank half of a water bottle, then pulled away from the curb. "So are you gonna watch the lacrosse try outs? I might be less nervous if you're there secretly cheering me on," I teased, trying not to sound like I actually meant it. I did, clearly, but I didn't want him to know how much I needed him there.

Without even glancing at me, he nonchalantly answered, as if it were nothing. "Well since Lydia will be there, that means I'm going to be dragged along too, so I'll be there. Not that you need a cheerleader, because you're going to be great."

For a few long seconds, I processed this new information. Finally, I stared at him, jaw dropped, searching for something to say without sounding like an asshole. "You never told me she was going to be at tryouts," I said through my teeth. If I wasn't nervous enough before, I was screwed now.

"You will be fine," he insisted, glancing at me with a small smile which did nothing to reassure me I wasn't going to make a fool out of myself. "She goes to all of the sports try outs. It's how she finds her next victim." He paused, sighing a little. "I mean boyfriend. Not victim."

I groaned, throwing my head back against the headrest. "Derek, why didn't you tell me! What if I make a fool of myself out there? What if I don't make the team? She'd never talk to me then!" He glared at me, but I didn't care. I knew my capabilities and making the lacrosse team was a long shot. I was only doing it to make Derek happy so we could move on to better and easier lessons. "I'm such an idiot."

"No," Derek argued, his voice firm. "You WILL make the team, Stiles. I taught you everything you need to know. The only thing you have to remember?" I raised an eyebrow, waiting for him to continue and stop being so mysterious. "Lesson number seven. Act like it doesn't hurt."

"Meaning?"

He rolled his eyes as he pulled into the school parking lot, taking a spot at the very end of the parking lot where no one else ever parked. "Meaning if you fall down, get pushed, miss a goal, whatever. . . act like it doesn't hurt. If you go out there and start crying the first time you get knocked down, you won't make the team or impress the girl."

I let that sink in for a few long seconds, taking a couple deep breaths. Derek unbuckled my seat belt for me, then took my hand in his. My first instinct was the jerk away, but I let that feeling pass and let him do whatever weird shit he was doing. Our hands were on the middle consul and Derek faced the steering wheel, his eyes closed. "What are we doing?" I wondered, very confused.

He half smiled and cracked one eye open to look at me before closing it again. "Meditating. It helps calm you down. Just try it for a minute." I nodded, taking a deep breath as I closed my eyes. If there was anything I needed most right now, it was to calm the fuck down. Thinking about Lydia Martin watching me fall on my face was stressful. Somehow, holding Derek's hand while we sat in silence, was not helping. It only made my heart faster and somehow I could hear it beating in my chest. I quickly pulled my hand back to my own lap, clearing my throat. "Not helping?" he asked, a little disappointed.

I tried to ignore the heat in my cheeks. "Not really," I mumbled, reaching for the door. "I'll see you at try outs. Thanks for the ride." And after that, I stumbled out of the car and bolted into the building. Whatever the hell was getting into me needed to stop. Derek was only nice to me because we had an agreement, right? Our relationship was strictly business. Even if I wanted to be friends with him, it wasn't a good idea.

I quite literally ran into Scott on my way to my locker. "Woah, buddy, you look like you've seen a ghost!" he laughed, wrapping an arm around my shoulders as we walked together to my locker. I was still a little shaken up about being in Derek's car, holding his hand, and not being able to explain my feelings.

I faked a small laugh, stopping in front of my locker to put my things away. "I'm just a little nervous about try outs after school."

Scott slapped my shoulder with a grin on his face. "Don't be, man. You're going to kill it." I shrugged, not really wanting to go into detail. "I'll see you at lunch," he promised. "And stop worrying. It's not good for you." And then he ran off towards his own class.

I went through the motions all day, but when the last bell rang, the nerves became worse. I walked to the locker room, changed into shorts and a t-shirt, and when Coach came in to pass out practice jerseys and pads, I put those on too. Coach gave a long speech and some rules about lacrosse, called a few peoples names, the usual. Suddenly, we were walking out onto the field. I stared at the back of Scott's jersey, trying to stay focused. Stupidly, once I got to my position, I glanced at the bleachers, my eyes finding Derek before anyone else. He was looking at me too, so maybe that was the reason I found him before Lydia. She wasn't right next to him, but she was sitting in that section with their group of friends. Great. Every popular kid in the school was going to watch me fail. Even after Derek gave me a thumbs up, I still knew I was going to get myself killed out here.

For the first half of try outs, I made a complete fool of myself. I fell multiple times after getting plowed into by Jackson, Danny, and even Liam, who was a freshman. I made a point of not looking at Derek or Lydia the whole time, mostly because I couldn't face the disappointment. But after the first half, I started getting the hang of things. What Derek taught me was making even more sense. I started making goals here and there, blocking the hits, and I managed to stay on my feet for the most part. Basically, I didn't absolutely suck.

Once it was over, I rushed my ass back to the locker rooms. We wouldn't find out who made the team until Monday after school and honestly, I didn't know if I would make it or not. I was happy try outs were out of the way, at least. I was in a fine mood, until I saw the love of my life hanging all over another guy.

I hadn't even seen her walk over towards the locker rooms, but there she was, right outside the locker rooms, her hands all over Jackson Whittemore. To say I was devastated was an understatement. I thought my heart had stopped beating. My mouth was dry. Obviously, she wasn't going to talk to me yet, but to be flirting with Jackson? Did she not have standards?

When I finally managed to tear my eyes away from that horrible scene, I turned to find Derek, his hands in his pockets as he stared at me. He nodded his head to gesture behind the locker rooms, so I followed him, making sure no one could see. I wasn't exactly in the mood to talk after seeing Lydia with Jackson, but maybe Derek could help.

He was leaning against the wall when I got back there. He grinned when I stepped closer, holding his hand out to stop me from coming closer. "Woah, slow down, you smell awful." He laughed, but it faded when he realized I wasn't in the mood for jokes. "Alright, I get it. You're depressed because the girl you like was doing the thing she always does."

"I know she doesn't see me yet, but watching her fall for that jerk? It hurts, okay?" I was being childish, but I couldn't help it. Jackson was an ass and Lydia deserved so much more.

Derek rolled his eyes, which didn't make me feel better. So much for him helping. "Stiles, it means nothing. She just likes to flirt. If it has a dick and sits at the popular table, she'll flirt with it. Do you remember today's lesson?" He crossed his arms, waiting for me to stop moping, but I wasn't ready to stop yet. "Stiles, do you remember?" he repeated.

I sighed, looking away from his judgmental eyes. "Act like it doesn't hurt," I mumbled, digging my toe into the grass. "So what?"

"So," he said firmly, stepping closer to grab my shoulders. He waited for me to look at him, so I did, even though I really didn't want to. "Act like it doesn't hurt," he repeated. "This isn't the end of the world. You still have a chance, and a pretty good one too. You're a great guy, Stiles. She just hasn't had the chance to see it yet. But I promise, she will."

I bit the inside of my cheek. Our eyes were still locked, but he was getting blurry as my eyes filled with tears. I blinked them away, letting Derek pull me closer until we were within hugging distance. I wanted to, but I didn't. If I gave in to that urge, there was no telling what else would happen. Not in that way, but you know, people might see or something. I don't know. Derek had been giving me confusing feelings lately. "I don't know what to do now," I sighed.

He finally dropped his hands back to his own sides, now wearing a small smile. "Well, first you're going to go shower. Then, we're going to get ice cream, go back to your place, and have a classic movie marathon."

"Are you sure? Don't you have homework?" I laughed, shaking my head. I liked his plan, even though I still had yet to talk to him about how our relationship was getting too personal. For one more night, I could just enjoy his company and let myself feel better. Right?

Derek nudged me back towards the locker rooms. "Yes, but I have all weekend to do it. Now go clean yourself," he retorted, waving me off. I grinned, but listened without arguing any more. He was right. I did smell bad.