Chapter 12

All the Fifteen members gathered in the waiting room on filming day. The stylist and wardrobe team was taking a look at our outfits, and we were helping each other out as well.

Jumi, who was in the other dorm, was especially surprised when she saw me.

“Omg! Sian!”

Jumi was a girl of average looks and a slightly chubby figure. But she had become quite slender. I guess she also had been dieting. Anyway, she came and gave me a hug. Her ample bosom pressed against mine once again, and I gave her a thumbs up at her impressive volume.

“Jumi, have you been good? You’ve lost a lot of weight!”

“You’ve lost even more!”

She scanned me up and down. I guess she was able to see the change in me too. Well, she and I did spend two years together, so she knew my body well.

“I’m glad you noticed.”

I said with a smile. It was satisfying to have my hard work validated.

“You might as well have shrunk in half. Did those comments hurt you?”

Jumi knew that there was a significant amount of hate directed at me, and she had sent me multiple text messages after the first episode aired. But I definitely did not shrink in half.

“It wasn’t really the comments… But more so the way I looked on camera.

Yes. It was my body, but I had never seen such a pig before. I was mortified seeing myself on screen.

“Anyway, good job! Producer Park will be really proud!”

“Or will he?”

I scoffed. Producer Jinwoo Park. Would he even be able to tell that I had lost weight? As I said before, the difference wasn’t quite visibly noticeable yet. But still, if he had a keen eye, he’d be able to spot the change. I was kind of excited. Our manager Hak-gyu came inside the waiting room.

“It’s almost time to start! Finish up getting ready! Chin up, everyone!”

Hak-gyu cheered us on.

***

We entered the Fifteen audition studio. There was a star-shaped stage in the center, and two longer stages on either side where we could stand in a single-file line. Above that was the judge’s panel table. Producer Jinwoo Park sat there.

“Yoo-young’s dorm members stand on the right, Jiyeon’s members to the right.”

The program producer in charge directed us to our spots. We moved as he told us, and waited in our respective lines.

“I’m so nervous, Sian.”

Rinzhi said next to me. It was her first time experiencing something like this. Of course she’d be nervous. But it was the first time for me too. And I wasn’t nervous at all. I had gone through all sorts of experiences in my life. This was nothing to me.

“Don’t worry. All you have to do is perform exactly as you practiced. Nothing more, nothing less. As long as you try your best, the rest is up to destiny.”

“You’re right. Let’s do this!”

Rinzhi clenched both fists, determined. It was a bit cringey… I guess women like this kind of stuff…

I scanned the girls on the right side stage as we were standing facing each other. They were standing in this order: Jumi Yeom (21), Ara (21), Jimin Kim (18), Jihyun Yoo (22), Jia Lee (21), Eunmi Lee (19), Liang Liang (21).

Jumi (21) and Jihyun (22) were the vocals of that group, so there was a good chance they’d be compared to Yoo-young (22) and myself. Jumi and me, Yoo-young and Jihyun. Especially Yoo-young and Jihyun, who were the same age and the oldest of their respective dorm groups. Their roles were overlapping, but at the same time they were completely different.

If I were to judge them objectively using my memories, first I’d say Yoo-young is a good singer. She led Lovely Girl in its trio days as the main vocal, and her talent was probably within the top 10 in Korea. And she had a pretty face on top of that. The great personality was a special bonus. If I were to pick the idol star of idol stars, it’d be Yoo-young Lee. Cons, she didn’t make for good TV. She was more on the serious side. Jumi and I were the same in that regard, which could be another reason Lovely Girl was a flop.

On the other hand was Jihyun Yoo. As I’ve said before, she was a student at a prestigious university. She had a very pretty girl-next-door type of look, and somehow had secured a great number of male fans even before debuting. Compared to her looks, her vocal talent was mediocre, but the points I mentioned previously gave her a great bias. However, she had a nasty habit of jumping from guy to guy, constantly seeking attention of all male figures. There were rumors that she was quite promiscuous, but let’s just say those were just rumors… But one thing was certain, which was that she was always involved with someone.

Well anyway, I was very curious who would come out victorious out of the two.

Just then, a spotlight dropped down upon the judge’s table, and Jinwoo Park appeared.

“Hi girls.”

He smiled his best “caring dad” smile as he waved. He made eye contact with each one of us, but skimmed by me. I cursed at him inside.

‘Why that bastard.’

I didn’t really care, but at the same time I was a bit hurt.

Anyway, we all greeted him in return. The air was a mixture of nervousness and excitement.

“Have you all prepared for the mission I gave you?”

“Yes…”

We replied nervously. Jinwoo smiled.

“Don’t be so nervous. Just show me what you practiced. I already know that you are all so talented. That’s why you were able to participate in Fifteen in the first place, out of all those trainees out there. Right?”

Everyone nodded. It was true. All the girls here in this room were talented. They were all ready to debut today, if need be. Although of course, some were more talented than others.

Anyway, he blabbed on about this and that before finally starting the audition.

“Okay, then let’s get started. Week 1’s mission was what I can do best. I will choose the order of performance randomly.”

The screen on one of the walls turned on as soon as he completed his sentence, and all eyes turned towards it. There was a big question mark on the screen, which then turned into a 5. It began to count down.

[5!]

[4!]

[3!]

[2!]

[1!]

[Sian Lee!]

The countdown stopped and my name appeared. I was the first to go. Everyone turned to look at me and I laughed. Might as well get it over with first. I was glad to go first.

“Okay, so Sian is first. Will you come to the stage?”

I made my way to the star-shaped stage. My housemates cheered me on, and I thanked them with a smile. I stood on the stage.

I looked at Jinwoo Park, and he looked back at me before bursting out in laughter. The meaning of that laughter. I knew what it was. But I didn’t want to satisfy him with a response. I was at a disadvantage here.

“O, okay...Sian. Looks like you’ve gotten even bigger.”

‘Motherfucker.’

I cursed him out inside before I could help it. I lost 14 kg. But what? Got even bigger?

“It’s just a joke, hahaha.”

He laughed again before continuing.

“So Sian, what are you best at?”

The snide undertones of his words read, “What else could you be good at besides singing?” I restrained myself. Thinking about it now, I realized that what I was best at, at least during my time here, was restraining myself. Anyway, I answered his question.

“Losing weight.”

“Pft.”

Jinwoo covered his mouth as he guffawed out loud. It wasn’t just him. Even the Fifteen members on the right-hand stage were unable to suppress their laughter. Yeah, laugh all you want.

“Ah, I’m sorry Sian. We’re not laughing at you...Pft!”

And he laughed again. Was it that funny? Anyway, he laughed for quite awhile before catching his breath and looking at me again.

“Alright, Sian. Losing weight? Sure. It’s honestly a little surprising. I thought that you would sing for sure. You really are a great singer. But losing weight? As far as I know, you’ve only lost up to 2 kg during your 2 years after debut. Did you lose more than that?”

He looked me up and down as he talked, as if he just couldn’t believe it. Even I myself couldn’t see a big difference. How would others be able to? If a pig lost 14kg, is it not still a pig?

“I’ve lost more than that.”

“Really?”

“Yes.”

“Then will you show us?”

He asked dryly, clearly not expecting anything amazing. I nodded.

“I’ll show you.”

I looked towards the screen, and everyone else’s eyes followed. The screen split in half. The left side showed my body at 95kg, and on the right side was a question mark. In place of the question mark would be each milestone I hit, with the date and weight of each one. No one looked excited. How much could the pig have lost? They were doubtful. The question mark disappeared and my Day 1 weight appeared.

The End