Chapter 27

“I like using my body.”

“Really? Can you dance at all?” Jihyun asked.

“Yes,” Jia and Yoojin answered at the same time. They both giggled and jinxed each other. I put my head in between them.

“Hey!”

“You guys really like skinship, don’t you?”

“What’s wrong with that? We’re both girls.”

“I know I said this before, but even guys don’t do that with other guys.”

At those words, Jia pouted.

“When did you even learn to dance? Well, good luck, I guess,” Jihyun muttered before turning to look back at the TV. We all did. To curse out Jinwoo and C-Night, that is.

“There’s no hidden cameras, right?” Jia asked, looking around. She should worry. She’s the one who cursed out Jinwoo the most.

The program soon ended and the voting began immediately afterwards. As expected, everyone took out their phones to check out the voting. To no one’s surprise, Yoo-young, Jihyun, and Jia were immediately in the Top 3. Jihyun was first. Then, it was Yoo-young. Jia was third, but then went down to fourth, then fifth. Hainan took her spot. She kept going back and forth between third and fourth. Meanwhile, Jia and Jumi were battling for fourth and fifth. Jumi. She was sexy in this last mission. I guess the male viewers really liked it. Maybe she got a lot of sympathy of them because of C-Night’s harsh comments. But what was my rank…

“Oh!” I shouted as soon as I saw mine. If I could see my name, that meant I was in the Top 10. Yes, I said that right. I was definitely in the Top 10!

“Yipee! Yahoo! Yipee ki yay!” I was so excited that I began to cry out strange words. But I wasn’t the only one who was happy. Hainan ran towards me to give me a hug and Jia did the same from behind. Unfortunately, not all of us were celebrating. Not all of us present had made it into the Top 10.

“Eunmi, don’t worry. Your name will show up next time.”

I approached Eunmi and patted her on the back. She was still young at nineteen. As far as she was concerned, this was the worst thing that could happen.

“I wasn’t in the Top 10 last time either,” Eunmi snapped as she continued to cry.

“I’m sure you’ll make it next time.”

“What if I don’t?”

“Then you will after that.”

“And what if I get eliminated?”

“Join a different company,” I said wisely and Eunmi nodded. Huh. I was kidding. Now I felt bad since she was taking it so seriously.

“I’m kidding. You can just try harder and grab the next opportunity that comes along. But there’s still a lot of episodes left. I’m sure you’ll get into the Top 10.”

“Thanks, Sian.”

What is she thanking me for? Was she really comforted by what I said? Or is it because I told her to go to a different company? Well, anyways, it wasn’t my problem anymore.

After an hour so, the rankings were pretty much decided. The fact that none of us looked away from our phones was in itself pretty impressive. The rankings were as follows:

Jihyun Yoo

Yoo-young Lee

Hainan

Jia Lee

Jumi Yeom

Rhinzi

Jimin Kim

Yoojin Jeong

Sena

Sian Lee

Jimin, who used to be tenth, managed to go up to seventh and Ara was kicked out. I took her spot, making up the overall Top 10.

“Today was unbelievable.”

I can’t help but worry that the results will change overnight. The voting hasn’t finished so I couldn’t get too comfortable. The chances aren’t likely, but still.

“Sian, are you going to work out?” Jia asked.

“No.”

“Why not?”

“I don’t need to anymore.”

It’s true. I’m now exactly 50 kg. Oh, happy days.

“Still, come with me. I don’t want to by myself. I’m scared.”

Jia quickly grabbed me by the arm and pouted, hinting at a full-blown tantrum if I didn’t say yes. Somehow, I ended up humoring her. Hey, I do have a mentality of a guy. If a pretty, young girl was clinging onto me, how can I be expected to turn her down?

“Fine, let’s go. But we have to be back by midnight.”

“Ok!” Jia exclaimed, skipping joyfully out.

***

Walking out at night can be scary. But if Jia was scared, she didn’t show it.

“Why do you want to work out at night if you’re so scared of going out in the dark?”

“I have you, so what’s to be scared about?” Jia said, linking her arms with me once again. True, I am here. Maybe it’s because I portray such a strong, confident figure that the trainees seem to feel safe when they have me around.

“But you know, you’re pretty amazing.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, with what you did with the sword. And losing all the weight. And now you’re going to dance too.”

I felt a smile creep up my face at Jia’s compliment. A compliment is enough to make anyone’s day, as they say.

“You saying you didn’t expect me to be this cool?”

“Honestly, no. I thought that you could just sing and that’s it.”

Okay, I had to give her that. I knew she wasn’t the only one who thought that either – that I was just some fattie who could sing. But now, I’ve changed. And everyone could see that now.

“Let’s promise each other to get into the Top 8 and debut as Lovely Girlz together.”

“Alright,” I answered, ruffling Jia’s hair. That’s when we heard it. Somewhere in the distance, a group of guys were chatting loudly, coming closer with every second. Judging by the amount of curse words and lewd comments these guys were making, I’d say they were definitely drunk. They were walking with this arrogant swagger that seemed unsuitable for how young they looked.

Soon, we were passing them. But of course, they had to stop and see us. And call out to us.

“Hey, you!”

One guy called out and I turned to look at him. He was tall, but really skinny. He had tattoos on his arm and a face that just made me want to punch him.

“What?” I snapped. Jia immediately tried to pull me away, fear evident in her eyes.

“Sian, let’s…let’s just go…okay?”

“Hang on.”

I pushed Jia behind me and she gladly hid herself behind my back.

“Damn, this one’s feisty. What’s your name, kitten?”

Another guy spoke as he leered at me. He and three others stood in front of us, blocking our way. It was dark. We were in a residential alleyway. There was no chance of other people coming by.

“I like this one. She’s just my type.”

One guy reached out to touch Jia. I pushed his hand away so hard that it nearly broke.

Crack!

“Ah!”

The guy cradled his hand and stepped back, glaring at me furiously.

“Bitch! You’re crazy!”

“Aw, come on, Sanghyun. Don’t be like that. The kittens will get scared.”

Another guy stepped up and put his hand on my shoulder. He said, “You guys busy? Come have a drink with us? Just one drink, please?”

The guy leaned closer, reeking of soju. I smirked.

“You laughing at me?”

“I’m calling the cops.”

I gave them one warning, to be nice. Hey, I have some decency. I can’t just hit anyone just because I’m in a bad mood. That’s just rude.

“Aw, come on. No need for the cops. It’s just one drink. Come on. Be a good girl and come with us, okay?”

Then, this bastard grabbed my wrist and tried to pull me away. I took my other hand and punched him in the face.

Pow!

The sound was explosive and the guy staggered backwards, almost falling to the ground. He cried out in pain.

“Aah! Fuck! My tooth!”n/o/vel/b//in dot c//om

He spat out the tooth and blood from his mouth along with a string of curse words. It loked like a molar. I guess I hit him a little harder than I intended. Then again, I had gone easy on him. If I’d hit him with all the strength I really had, his head would’ve done a full 360 and snapped his neck.

“This bitch needs to learn some respect.”

Another asshole put his hand on me and I kneed him in the groin.

Wham!

“Agh!”

His hands flew to his crotch and he fell to the ground right there. It didn’t explode or anything, did it? Aw, well, who cares? I was acting in self-defense and the security cameras were capturing everything anywhere.

Anyways, another guy came running and I aimed a kick to his chest. Then another side kick to the throat. The last guy got a Brazilian kick to the chin and another one straight to the jaw for good measure.

“Fuck! This bitch!”

The bastards began to run, cursing at me the whole way. No doubt in shock. I’m sure none of them expected to be dealt with by a delicate-looking thing like me.

“Fucking assholes.”

I shook my hands off.

“Sian! That was so cool!”

Jia squealed, giving me a hug. I immediately pushed her off.

“Get off me.”

And that concluded our walk. I was the only one who got a workout that evening.

***

The next day, we all headed back to the studio.

“Sian, you’ll be in the center.”

Jia ordered.

“Can I be in the center?” Yoo-jin asked hesitantly.

“Yoo-jin, you want to be in the center?”

“Yeah. You ranked fourth. I’m eighth. I’m scared that I’ll go down.”

“Hey. I’m tenth.”

I pointed out.

“If your rank goes up, then I’ll be ninth. I won’t make it to the group!” Yoo-jin said loudly. I grabbed her by the scalp.

“Who taught you to speak like that, huh?”

My outburst made Yoo-jin shrink back and she lowered her eyes with regret.

“Well, what should we do?” Jia asked worriedly.

“Whatever. Let her have it. I don’t care,” I asked, letting go of Yoo-jin. The center. The position that gets all the focus and attention from the audience. That’s why everyone wants it. I’m not saying that I should have it, but Yoo-jin really didn’t have the visuals for the center position. Not everyone can be the center. You have to be the most popular or the most attractive out of everyone. But all Yoo-jin had for her was her curves. No charm, nothing special. Still, since she wanted it so badly, I guess she could have it.

“Fine. Yoo-jin can be center.”

“Thanks, Jia!”

Yoo-jin brightened up considerably.

“And let’s stick with the song this time. If we change to another one, we won’t have time to practice.”

I pointed out. We’ve already tried and canceled two songs. They didn’t really fit. ‘Fire Dance’ was our third song. We don’t have time to change to a fourth. Especially since we were supposed to meet with the dance teacher tomorrow for evaluation. That’s why we planned to practice all night if we had to.

***

Midnight.

We were still practicing.

“I still can’t get it.”

I tilted my head this way and that, as if that would help me make some sense of this choreography. It was harder than I thought it would be. The moves were confusing. How can I turn my pelvis right when my torso is going left?

“It’s hard, isn’t it?” Jia said, wiping the sweat off her forehead. She wiped the sweat off mine as well.

“More than I expected.”

I’m good with average choreographies, but this one was a killer.

“What about the body roll?”

Jia said, demonstrating it with her own body. I shook my head. I can’t even make a limb move that way, much less my whole body.

“What about popping?” Yoo-jin asked, doing a popping move. She pumped her chest as an example.

“Yoo-jin, stop.”

“Sorry.”

Yoo-jin stopped moving her chest. I hate to say it, but I was grateful for that.

“What are we going to do tomorrow?” Jia said, obviously worried.

“I’ll keep trying,” I said firmly. Of course, whether I’ll be able to pick it up by tomorrow is another matter…

“But who’s going to evaluate us?” Yoo-jin asked.

“I heard we’re getting Mi-hyang Kim, the dance teacher.”

At Jia’s answer, Yoo-jin gasped with a look of horror.

“What? What’s wrong?” I asked.

“Ms. Kim is known for being really strict and mean. She’s not going to go lightly on us!”

“That’s why I’m worried too,” Jia replied, giving me a pointed look. It was obvious why she was so worried.

“It’s fine. If we get criticized, then so be it.”

I spoke like it wasn’t a big deal. If I don’t do well, I’ll receive some harsh feedback, and if I do well, I’ll receive good feedback. That’s what learning is.

“She can be really harsh...You know what she said to me once? She smirked at me while asking me if I had shit for brains. It was so bad.”

“I mean, it’s true.”

“Sian!”

Yoo-jin interjected, shocked. I turned to her and spoke, “Look, why don’t you guys go and get some rest. I’ll stay and practice some more.”

“You want us to leave? At this time? No way! It’s scary!”

Jia insisted. That was true. It was late. It would be dangerous for two girls to be out alone at this time.

“Should we just sleep here? It’s pretty spacious and there’s a bathroom and shower and everything.”

Yoo-jin suggested, and also true. The agency did have nice rooms that were pleasant to sleep in. There was AC too.

“Let’s do that! But first, I’m hungry.”

Jia clutched her stomach and pretended to faint. I mean, we have been practicing for hours…

“I’ll go buy something to eat.”

“Do you have money?”

“Yeah.”

Of course I had money. Lots of it, actually. This girl has been active as an idol for two years, saving every cent along the way.

“I’ll get cup noodles and kimbap.”

“Yay! But, Sian, can you eat those things now?”

“Hell yeah! Look at how much weight I’ve lost.”

“Okay!” Jia exclaimed. I walked out of the studio. At the nearby convenient store, I bought three cup noodles, three rolls of kimbap, and added three bottles of sparkling water. Hmm, maybe I’ll get three hot dogs too...and some spicy galbi. And some rice and kimchi. Oh, and some seasoning. I added some chips as well.

“Won’t this make me fat?” I asked myself, but I decided I didn’t particularly care. My metabolism was at an all-time high now so I figured I’d lose the gained pounds instantly. I didn’t have to worry about such things anymore.

After the convenient store, I hit a nearby 24-hour bakery and I bought a cake. A chocolate one with strawberries on top.

I took my purchases and carried them back to the studio.

“I’m back~”

I put down the food and Jia and Yoo-jin came running over like hyenas. They immediately unwrapped the food.

“Oh my gosh! This looks so good!”

“Oh, but…is this a good idea?” Jia and I looked at Yoo-jin when she said that. I quickly asked,

“What do you mean?”

“If I eat all this, I’ll go up a cup size...”

And once again, Yoo-jin was spewing nonsense. I quickly shoved a hot dog into her mouth.

“Ah! Sian! You’re supposed to take the wrapping off firs!”

***

We ended up practicing until dawn before falling asleep. Soon, it was morning. There were showers and a bathroom so we didn’t need to go back to our dorms. It’s not like we needed all of our makeup either.

But then…

“Ugh. I need to shave.”

“You didn’t get hair removal?”

“No.”

I shook my head. Ugh, why does my body hair have to grow so fast?

“After evaluation, let’s go do it together.” Jia suggested.

“Doesn’t it hurt?”

“They use a laser so it doesn’t hurt. It’s like a pinprick.”

“Okay, let’s do it. I’ll just try to hide it for now.”

Obviously, since I couldn’t get rid of it now, I had to try and hide it. The VJs soon arrived to film us.

“Good morning, Sian!” Jun-jin greeted me energetically. I felt a twinge of regret when I saw his arm still in a cast.

“Hi.”

“How’ve you been?”

“Good. What about you?”

“Me too!”

“You’re here early.”

“The early bird gets the worm.”

“But it’s the second mouse that gets the cheese.”

“....”

“I’m kidding. Have you eaten?” I asked.

“Oh, yes, I did. What about you?”

“I’m about to go have breakfast.”

And with that, I headed towards the cafeteria with Yoo-jin and Jia. But to my dismay, the VJs remained right behind us. Were they planning to follow us around all day?

The food in the cafeteria was actually really good, but it was hard to enjoy it with the VJs surrounding us.

“You seem to be enjoying it,” Jun-jin said as he sat next to me and shoved the camera into my face. With no other option, I winked at the camera and continued to eat, but in a more composed manner. If this were to be broadcast, there’s no way people would be able to look away. I knew I looked beautiful at the moment. My face size was currently the same as Jia’s, but my body was more glamorous. That plus my girl brush image. I had everything going at the moment. I already couldn’t wait for the next rankings.

“But you lost a lot of weight. I almost didn’t recognize you.”

“It’d be better if you didn’t.”

“Oh, heh heh...”

“But do you really have to film us eating?” I asked because I really was curious. I didn’t understand why they would film something like that. What’s the point?

“The fans like to know what you guys are like behind-the-scenes.”

“Really?”

Interesting.

“That’s what creates a fandom. The public really likes those who are more relatable and seem normal.”

I nodded at that. A fandom, huh? Does that mean I have one too? I wonder how happy the original owner of this body would be if she knew? But then, would I have to lie my whole life as a woman? Even the Heavens would get tired of that