Cocky Romance: Chapter 5
Cocky Romance (Billionaire Dads)
Keep breathing.
Inhale, exhale. Inhale, exhale. Inhaleâ
Crap.
Doing the breathing exercises I learned from Darrel isnât working. I have to call the therapist again. Find another way to calm down.
At least I can have my meltdown in the privacy of the makeup room rather than in front of the director who likes to yell âcutâ, the photographer hurling instructions I donât understand, and Max Stintonâs chilly blue-eyed stare.
The gorgeous fiend.
He completely took me by surprise today.
Most of the time, he glares at me with cold contempt. It feels like heâd rather scrape my dignity off the floor than try to treat me like an equal. But he didnât hesitate to take my side when the crazy hairstylist attacked my hair, and he was something close to sweet when he gave that pep talk during the photoshoot.
I almost wondered if heâd turned into a human being.
Almost.
But one glance at his scowling face when he returned to his seat beside the director and I knew the Ice King had returned.
I donât get him.
Not that I want to get him.
Itâs justâ¦
Urgh.
Thinking about Max is not helping my anxiety whatsoever.
And rest assured, I need to be calm in front of the camera. Because weâre not just taking photos now. Every word I say, every gesture of my hand, every part of my face and body is about to be recorded and sent out to the world.
I feel anything but ready.
My eyes skid to the mirror as I behold the results of a five-man makeup and wardrobe team. I had no idea stylists were so⦠ferocious. The whirlwind of activity that descended on me for the interview nearly knocked the breath out of my lungs.
Makeup brushes and powder whipped particles in the air; the hairstylist raked my hair with conditioner and Eco-styler gel; a frantic aide went on and on about interview etiquette.
I didnât hear a word of it.
This isnât my world.
All I want is a misbehaving car and some tools.
Instead, I have a face that doesnât look like mine and heartburn.
My fingers tremble as I reach out to the mirror.
Shimmer on my eyelids. Lashes that curl way longer and thicker than mine ever could. Red on my lips. Gold on my cheekbones.
This isnât who I am.
Iâm notâ¦
This.
Glamorous.
Itâs why I fought to keep wearing my over-alls when the stylist tried to stick me in a dress. Iâm only sacrificing so much of who I am for the spotlight. Iâm not ready to leave the comfort of a jumper yet.
My hands flutter over the shiny white top. The wardrobe director had a mini-breakdown when I refused to wear her gown. I almost had a flying fit when she tried to force me into a mini-skirt.
We reached a compromise.
Iâm wearing a âtrendyâ top with my jumper as trousers. The sleeves of the over-alls are tied around my waist. I donât mind. Iâve worn my jumper like this before. Especially when itâs hot. Auto shops can turn into a boiler room every summer.
Iâm glad she agreed to work with me.
Although I wonder if she would have been so accommodating if not for Stinton throwing out the first hairstylist. His actions said a whole lot to the wardrobe and makeup artists. Theyâve been tiptoeing around me ever since.
Why am I thinking about Stinton again?
I havenât forgotten my promise to defy him.
Heâs still a Stinton. Heâs still the grump-hole whoâs holding my daughterâs wellbeing as ransom.
Besides, itâs not like heâs treating me semi-decently because he has a heart somewhere in that gas chamber of a body. Itâs because, like heâs mentioned a million times, Iâm a company asset.
From today onward, Iâm not only representing Stinton Auto but, by extension, all of Stinton Group. If I screw up, he does too.
Thatâs all it is. No need to get all soft and lose my objectivity.
My phone buzzes from my purse.
I leap out of my seat and reach for it, frowning when I see an unknown number. Since I donât have a habit of picking up strange calls, I let it die out.
A second later, my phone buzzes with a text.
Stinton.
Itâs like he can sense how nervous I am and his âjerkâ sensors went berserk.
STINTON: Pick up when I call you.
I stare at his message and annoyance claws at my chest. If I thought he was abrupt and bossy in person, his texts are ten times more uncivil.
Should I ignore it or send him a virtual slap upside the head?
With a sigh, I choose neither.
ME: What do you want?
STINTON: I have an emergency to take care of. I wonât be there for the interview.
ME: Perfect. I wonât have to stare at your scowling face the entire time.
STINTON: Very funny. This is important. Donât screw up.
ME: By screw up do you mean mention that the head honcho of Stinton Group has a penchant for hurling threats at innocent women in elevators?
STINTON: You have a way of making reality sound far more dramatic than it is. Curb that. It wonât translate well on TV.
I dig my fingers into the phone.
Scum.
Handsome scum but stillâ¦
I picture him sitting rigid and regal in his expensive car, looking out over the city like a brooding Batman. Heâs twirling his fingers the way he did in the elevatorâthat hint of a smile on his lips and his eyes narrowed like they always are, like he knows heâs better than everyone else and he couldnât be bothered.
ME: Itâs not like youâll be here to stop me.
STINTON: Just assume Iâm always watching you, Banner.
I stare at the message.
Then I swallow hard and glance over my shoulders.
Thereâs no one there.
ME: Stalker alert.
STINTON: For the next few months, you are Stinton Groupâs property. Watching you is in my job description.
ME: Iâm no oneâs property, Stinton.
STINTON: Bring that confidence to the interview. Donât wimp out on me, Banner.
I throw a punch at my phone screen, pretending itâs his obnoxiously gorgeous face. Somewhere beneath my belligerence, I can tell that Stinton is intentionally provoking me. He wants to distract me from my nerves. Or maybe Iâm giving him too much credit. Maybe he just delights in ticking me off.
The door cracks open and a confused-looking crew member tells me itâs time for the interview.
âIâll be right there.â
She nods and closes the door, probably wondering if Iâve completely lost my mind.
Maybe I have, lady.
Never in a million years did I think Iâd be in front of the camera. I used to run from things like this growing up. I wasnât that girl. The one with the long flowing hair, the perfect smile, the penchant for dressing up.
I didnât even have the body for it. While the other girls in school were developing curves, I was stuck trying to figure out where my back stopped and my butt began.
It didnât help that my wardrobe was heavily inspired by my dadâs âgrab anything clean and nearbyâ style of clothing. Soon, it became very clear to me that it was better to stay as far away from the limelightâand peopleâas possible.
Now, Iâm about to offer myself up to the jerks who never grew past high school. Iâll expose myself to the cesspool that is the social media comment section, facing keyboard warriors who will have no problem tearing me apart from the comfort of their parentsâ basement.
âI can do this. Iâll be fine.â Taking another breath, I stomp out of the room and almost trip.
Heat floods my face and I glance down at the heels. Theyâre like stilts strapped to my feet and so damn uncomfortable. Why do other women subject themselves to this?
Legs shaking like a newborn deer, I make my way slowly to the front of the warehouse. The backgroundâs been transformed. Now, thereâs a couch, greenery and a giant bookshelf. The lights and cameras are closer too.
My heart slams against my ribs.
I can do this. I can do this.
The interviewer is a chirpy brunette in a sharp blue pantsuit. She senses my nerves and pats my hand. âItâs okay.â Her smile is practiced and her teeth are so white, theyâre almost blinding. âI wonât ask you too many hard questions. Today, itâs all about getting to know you.â
âKnow me. Right,â I mumble.
âCan I get makeup? Sheâs sweating!â
Someone rushes up, dabs my forehead with a brush and then scurries out of sight.
âAction!â
The interviewer turns up the charm on a dime, speaking to the camera like itâs an old friend. I dig my fingers into the arm of the chair and hope I donât look as panicked as I feel.
She drones on and on.
I have no idea what sheâs saying.
Finally, she turns to me. âSo Dawnâcan I call you Dawn?â
âY-yes.â
She laughs and the sound peals against the rafters of the warehouse. âDid you know that female mechanics make up less than five percent of the industry? What made you choose to don these adorable overallsââ she cracks her mouth open to release another headache-inducing laugh, âand fix cars for a living?â
A sarcastic comment leaps to the edge of my tongue. Who is she calling âadorableâ? I suck the words back in, compose myself and answer as neatly as I can, âCars have always fascinated me. I knew I wanted to do something with them when I grew up.â
âBut you didnât just wake up one morning and decide on this path. How did that decision come about?â
I glance at the camera. Back to her. âMy father was a mechanic.â
âOh.â She leans her elbows on the chair and rests her chin on her fist in a classic tell me more pose.
I lick my lips. âHe taught me everything I know.â
âIâm sure heâs proud of you for all your accomplishments. What does he think of you becoming the face of Stinton Auto?â
Dad wouldnât have let Stinton Group get close to me in the first place. âHe, uh, died about eight years ago.â
âIâm sorry to hear that.â She pouts. âIt must be hard.â
Her sympathy feels fake. It makes it difficult to be sincere with her.
âI bet you dedicate every car you fix to him.â She bats her thick eyelashes.
âWellâ¦â
âI just love,â she reaches over and clasps my hands, âthe way youâre defying all the odds as a female mechanic. Itâs hard enough to make your mark in an industry thatâs dominated by men. But to know that youâre doing it for your late father,â she presses her lips together and shakes her head, âthat just makes it even more heartwarming.â
âThanks?â
She looks at me like Iâm an orphan who needs a family for Christmas. âI, for one, applaud you, Dawn. And I know that this great nation is ready to get behind the woman leading the charge for ladies in the industrial field. Ladies who are defeating the odds. Ladies everywhere.â
âI really wouldnât say that Iâm leading anythingââ
âCut! That was great.â The director applauds.
The interviewer drops my hand like itâs a hot potato and swishes her fingers together. Giving me a condescending smile, she mumbles, âYour hands are so rough, dear. You must let me recommend my salon.â
My jaw drops in shock.
Did she just⦠insult me?
Her assistant jogs toward her and hands her a bottle of sparkling water. She uncaps it, takes a sip and then smiles at me. âYou should also do something about your nails. I know it must be hard to clean them, but youâre still a woman, dear. And now youâre the face of Stinton Group. There are standards to uphold.â
My nostrils flare. âExcuse me?â
âA little nail polish will get rid of that stain real quick.â
Before I can launch to my feet and show her what these oil-stained hands can do to her nose job, the director approaches us and whisks her away, chatting about some upcoming project that he wants her to star in.
The stage crew whirls around me, clicking off lights, disconnecting wires and dismantling the backdrop. The lights shut off, flooding my âstageâ in darkness and shadows.
Voices volley back and forth, shouting instructions as they continue to deconstruct my surroundings. No one says a word to me. No one even looks at me.
For a split second, I was the center of their universe.
Now, Iâm just another prop.
Property of Stinton Group.
I curl my fingers into fists. Sure, I signed up to be Stintonâs little puppet, but I didnât realize how demoralizing it would feel. Nothing like being set on a pedestal, pumped for all the value you offer and then thrown aside like a busted-up fruit basket.
I renew my vow to never let Beth anywhere near this filth.
The world the Stintons own is fake and heartless.
No wonder Max Stinton is so comfortable here.
âHey.â
I turn and nearly explode with relief when I see Jeffersonâs face. The young driver looks vastly out of place in his blazer, skinny tie and long trousers amidst a blur of creatives in scarves and berets.
He lifts a hand in a self-conscious wave. âLooks like filmingâs over. Ready to go?â
âHell yes.â I smile.
He returns it and gestures to the door.
I walk out of the warehouse and into the sunshine. Lifting my head to the warmth of the real world, I take a deep breath and remember who I am.
Dawn Banner.
A true mechanic.
Not a gimmick.
Not an asset.
Just a regular woman who loves fixing things that break.
When I straighten, I catch Jefferson looking at me intently. âWas it that tough?â
âUnbelievably.â I rub the back of my neck. âI hate the cameras.â
âCome on. Youâre⦠I mean⦠youâre gorgeous. You must be used to all this attention.â
âThatâs not attention. Thatâs a circus.â I hook a finger over my shoulder.
âYou didnât enjoy it?â
âNot really. It reminded me of why I havenât taken a picture since⦠since I graduated technical college.â
âWhen was that? Last year?â
âYou sweet boy.â I motion to him as if Iâm pinching his cheeks. âNot even close, but thatâs nice of you to make me feel younger.â
âYou canât be that much older than me,â he mumbles, a red flush spreading over his cheeks.
I laugh. âThe fact that youâre blushing right now tells me exactly how much older I am.â
He scrubs his cheek. âIâm not blushing.â
âIâm in the bracket where most folks have experienced too much to blush anymore. So there you go.â
âJust because you feel old doesnât mean you are.â He opens the back door for me.
I shake my head. âSince He Who Shall Not Be Named isnât here, Iâd rather not stand on ceremony.â Gesturing to the passenger door, I ask, âIs it okay if I ride up here? I donât want to feel like Iâm catching a cab.â
âSure.â He slams the back door and moves to open the other one, but I beat him to the punch and slide into the seat that feels like butter.
I wait for Jefferson to join me before I ask, âWhere did Mr. Perfect run off to earlier?â
He wraps his hands on the wheel and stares straight ahead. âThe police station. I think it might have had something to do with his brother.â
âTrevor?â I stiffen.
Jefferson nods.
I wait for the usual disgust and annoyance that hits whenever I think of Elizabethâs father.
It doesnât come.
Instead, I start thinking about cobalt eyes darkening with worry. I think about firm pink lips disappearing into an anxious mouth. I think of a loosening tie and a perfect jaw line covered in stubble.
Oh, hell no. I shouldnât be giving any concern to what a Stinton might be feeling.
Iâm almost certain than Max Stinton has no feelings. Heâs just a walking-talking chasm wrapped in a face hand-hewn by the gods.
He doesnât have emotions.
Even if he does, I shouldnât give a ratâs behind about them.
âHeâs been like that since Trevor Stinton went missing.â Jefferson flicks the indicator. âOne tip about his brother and he drops whatever heâs doing to pursue it to the end.â
âAny tip? From anyone?â
âYup. Reliable or not.â Jefferson sighs heavily. âI almost feel sorry for him. Heâs been nothing but disappointed every time, but he still treats every tip like thereâs a real possibility. Then he puts his all into the search.â
âHe has to,â I say stiffly. Do not feel sorry for him. Do not feel sorry for him. âHe canât really redeem Stinton Group until his brother apologizes for what he did.â
âI donât think heâs doing it for Stinton Group.â Jefferson rubs his clean-shaven chin.
âWhat makes you so sure?â
âHe follows those tips personally.â
I snort. âThatâs it?â
His eyes flicker to me and then back to the road. âMr. Stinton has a million things to do every day. Heâs always on the phone or planning Stinton Groupâs next steps. Just watching him while I drive makes me tired.â His quiet laughter tightens the knots in my stomach. âYou know when he cares about something because he doesnât hand it off to his team. He drops everything and does it personally.â Jefferson juts his chin down like a wise old man. âThatâs how I know.â
The weird ache in my stomach climbs all the way up to my chest.
I bat at my curly ponytail. âCan I turn on the radio?â
âSure.â
The talk about Max Stinton drifts to nothing.
Music is the only sound in the car while Jefferson drives me to the garage. I stare at the auto shop and feel a piece of me that went missing return.
âThanks for the ride, Jefferson.â I open my door.
âRumor is that weâll be seeing you a lot more now that youâre working with Stinton Group.â
âThatâs true.â
âI look forward to it.â He gives me another smile and waves.
Isnât that cute?
The smell of car oil hits me square in the nose when I enter the workshop. I stand. Close my eyes. Inhale deeply. Just let the smells and the sounds of car engines rumbling fill my senses.
This morning has been such chaos. I need this.
âBanner, are you wearing makeup?â Willis swaggers toward me, his hand on his paunch and his eyes glittering like a rat.
My calm evaporates and a potent annoyance takes its place. âShut up, Willis.â
âYou were gone yesterday afternoon and again all this morning. Looks like somethingâs going on.â
âYouâre keeping tabs on me, Willis? I didnât know you cared so much. Iâm touched.â I make sure to dip those words in sarcasm.
âCare?â He snorts. âWhat I care about is the rumors Iâve been hearing.â
I bite his bait. âWhat rumors?â
âThat youâre taking over this place.â
I freeze. âWho told you that?â
âWord gets around in this industry, Banner. Plus, I heard you were at Stinton Group yesterday. What else would you be there to do?â
Signing away my face to Stinton Group, obviously.
âNone of your business.â I try to stalk past him.
He lifts a hand so I canât pass.
Alarm bells clang in my head. Willis has been grumbling about me for a long time. Mostly because Clint favors me and tends to give me the more technical jobsâwhich also happen to be the more expensive jobs.
I know Iâve been trampling on his fragile male pride ever since I started working here, but itâs the first time heâs shown such outward aggression.
âWhat are you doing?â I spit. âGet out of my way.â
âYou and me, weâre gonna have ourselves a little talk.â
I hold my ground even though everything inside me wants to step back. Clenching my teeth, I warn him, âYou better get the hell out of my face.â
âOr what? You gonna cry to Clint?â
My eyes dart to Clintâs office and a pang of fear swirls in my stomach when I realize itâs empty. Damn it. Heâs probably at the bank. Clintâs old-fashioned that way. He still makes his deposits himself. He loves standing in line and chatting with the cashiers.
Willis hovers over me, his eyes narrowed and his grizzly cheeks sucked in. âSee, this is what I donât like about you girls trying to take over the world. You canât do it on your own. You always want the world to bend and twist for you. Problem is, you canât have it both ways. Either youâre one of the guys or youâre a woman. But no, we gotta coddle you and pretend your feelings are fragile, and then we gotta give over our jobs to you just because youâre a woman. Is that fair?â
âBack the hell up!â My voice squeaks at the end. Crap.
Willis laughs.
I take a step back. Look around for something to defend myself with. If Willis gets physical, itâs game over. Iâm not stupid enough to think that my sheer will can block a punch from a man his size.
âCome on, Willis.â Marco, one of the newer hires whoâd been watching the whole thing, grabs Willisâs shoulder. âThatâs enough ragging, man. Banner does good work. Same as the rest of us.â
âThen youâre part of the problem.â He shoves Marco off roughly.
While Willis is distracted, I keep backing up. My tool trolley is just a couple steps away. If I can get to it, I can find something thatâll knock Willis out if he gets crazy.
âYouâre the reason she thinks she can prance around in here and take over.â Spit flies from Willisâs lips. âWhat if she turns this place into an all-female mechanic haven, huh? Whatâchu gonna do when she puts you out of a job?â
âWillis, you have no idea what youâre talking about,â Marco snaps.
âDonât I? Tell him, Banner.â Willis spins and notices my frantic search for a weapon. His eyes take on a crazy gleam and he sprints toward me.
Panic surges through my body. I whirl around, not bothering to hide what Iâm doing. In frantic movements, I dig through the tool trolley.
My fingers lock around a spanner just as Willisâs hand clamps hard on my shoulder. I spin and bring the spanner down, intending to whack him over the shoulder, but a hand appears out of nowhere.
I hear the clang of metal slamming against flesh.
Then everything goes still.
Eyes widening, I slowly shift my gaze away from Willisâs chin to the expensive watch and the gold cufflinks beneath a thick jacket sleeve. I keep going. Past the broad shoulders. The thick neck. The square jaw and straight nose. To the pure cobalt eyes that watch Willis with an arrogance that has to be inherent. It canât be learned. It canât be taught. It just⦠is.
My shoulders stiffen.
âMs. Banner, our contract states that you are not to get involved in any altercations for the duration of your tenure with Stinton Group.â
Shock loosens my grip.
Stinton pries the spanner from my fingers, his eyes never leaving Willis.
I jump back when I realize this isnât my imagination.
Max Stinton is here.
In the flesh.
âHowever,â Stintonâs hawk-like gaze causes Willis to shirk back, âI signed no such contract.â He smirks and lifts the wrench over his head. âSo I canâ¦â
âAh!â Willis recoils and covers his face.
Stinton stops the wrench an inch away from Willisâs nose. He chuckles, but itâs a sound as cold and dangerous as the mob bosses in my favorite black-and-white movies.
Dragging the wrench softly over Willisâs face, Stinton whispers, âWho taught you to put your hands on women like that?â
Willis trembles and says nothing.
Anger burns under my skin as I watch him fall apart in front of Max. Willis was so tough when it was me. When it was just a tiny and helpless woman. He could rant and rave about how much damage I was doing to the world of auto mechanics. Words seemed to be bubbling out of him.
Where is it now?
Whereâs the victim-whining gone?
Rage builds and builds inside me.
I want to snatch the spanner from Stinton and teach Willis a lesson. I want him to fight back and talk smack again. I want him to face me and give me respect, not because the owner of the company is here but because I deserve it. I earned it.
âAh ah.â Stintonâs blue eyes swerve to me as if he can read my mind. âCalm down, wolverine.â
I scowl at him.
He gives me a pointed look.
Jerk.
I take a step back even though it kills me and I let him play the hero.
âDoes anyone else want to share their disapproval with having a lady lead the shop?â Stinton swings the spanner. The fingers wrapped around the tool are long and elegant. Relaxed. Yet thereâs a control to his movements that give him a scary finesse.
The other mechanics enter the mechanic bay, probably drawn by all the shouting. They look at Willis, me and Stinton casually holding a spanner like a gun.
âWhatâs going on here?â
Marco shakes his head as if to say âdonât askâ.
Willis starts laughing.
My head whips around and my eyes narrow. What does he think is so funny?
Willis smacks his knees with a flat hand and bends over as if heâs stumbled on the worldâs best joke.
Swinging to face the other mechanics, Willis points at Stinton. âIâll tell you whatâs happening. Banner remembered sheâs a woman long enough to get her promotion the good old fashion way.â
My heart pounds hard and fast. A grim anger hardens inside me, bringing ugly feelings to the surface.
Iâve heard these accusations before.
Whenever I do well, my enemies always fall back to this.
âWhat way is that?â Stinton asks in a cold, deadly voice.
Willis must have figured heâs already screwed because he opens his mouth in a wild grin and whispers, âYou should know that better than me, Mr. Boss Man.â
Stintonâs lips curl up at the corners, but itâs nothing like the amused smirk that he wears around me. This one is tinged in poison. Something so dark and sharp, it makes me shiver.
Without warning, his fist flies forward and connects with Willisâs jaw. Itâs so quick that the other man is knocked out on the floor before I can blink.
My inhale is sharp and stunned.
Stinton calmly hands the spanner back to me, ignoring the man writhing on the ground. âAs of today, this man is fired. Iâll have his severance package arranged right away, although giving him anything would be generous of me.â
Willis groans and picks himself off the floor. His angry eyes are intent on Stintonâs back and he seems to be contemplating whether he should rush him.
I jump forward and swing my spanner like a bat. âI suggest you get out of here before we call the cops.â
Willis spits out blood. âGo ahead and call them. Heâs the one who punched me because I said what was on everyoneâs mind.â
âSpeak for yourself,â Marco says.
I whip my head around to stare at him in shock.
âYou donât speak for us,â Marco adds.
Willis reels back, his gaze darting to Marco. Then he starts laughing again. âMarco? You hit that too? Was it in the employee lounge or back behind the lift?â
Marco scoffs and rolls his eyes.
Stintonâs chuckle is a vibrating threat. He takes the spanner from me and stomps forward. âIt looks like we need to have another conversation.â
I launch my arm out to stop him from going at Willis again. I donât need him to rescue me. My work speaks for itself. My conduct and character canât be torn down this easily. The boys have this.
Willis throws his head back and laughs. âGo ahead. Hit me again. Itâll just line my pockets with more money when I sue you.â
Marco turns his face to the side. âSue him? For what?â
âHe punched me!â Willis shrieks. Sticking a finger at the bruise starting to form on his jaw, he croaks, âYou all saw it!â
âSaw what?â Henricks smacks his lips together.
Fuentes scowls. âYeah, I didnât see nothing.â
âWillis, you sure you didnât knock into a door or something? You gotta be more careful in the workshop.â
Laughter bubbles in my chest. I donât try to hide my amusement and let it sing through my voice when I gesture to the door. âI suggest you leave now before youâre escorted out, Willis.â
He curses up a storm and disappears. I hear his engine starting a moment later. His tires spit gravel as he tears out of the parking lot and drives out of the gravel path that leads to the street.
Silence falls on the shop.
No one moves.
Willis was one of the boys. Even if they stuck up for me, Iâm sure theyâre going to feel that loss. I glance at each man and try to find the right words to convey my gratitude. Before I can, Stinton and his big mouth steps in.
âIf anyone else has a problem with Ms. Bannerâs leadership, thereâs the door.â He gives them all equal glares and stomps toward Clintâs office.
I scowl at him. Did he really think that was the best time to say nonsense like that? After what just happened?
I let out a deep breath and face the other mechanics. âThanks, guys.â
âAnytime.â Marco looks me up and down. âYou okay?â
âYeah.â
âI meant with him.â He points to where Stinton is rummaging through Clintâs desk. âI can handle Willis-types all day, but the suits⦠theyâre sneaky.â
âDonât worry. I can handle Stinton.â
âThen weâll let you get to it.â Marco grins and nods. âBoss.â
Something warm fills my chest. I dip my chin and then seek out the bane of my existence who also happens to be the real boss and the man I just canât figure out.