Chapter 34: My Mascara Might Run
This Girl
Buzz. Buzz.
I groan into my pillows and pick up my phone, fumbling around on the bedside table for it with my head still in the pillow. I check the time first and realize its eight o'clock. I've woken up twice before this morning, only to drone off back to sleep within a minute. I unlock my phone and open the messages app.
Its a text from Alex. I move myself into a sitting position with my back against the wall and my legs stretched out in front of me. I click on his name and look at the text.
Wake up, I miss you.
I smile at the message and put my phone on the table beside me. I swing my legs off the bed and head downstairs for breakfast.
"Hi, Mum," I say, sitting down at the bench and pouring myself some cereal.
"Hey Nat. Get dressed, we're heading to the airport at ten," she says, looking up from her computer.
"Airport?" I ask, now pouring milk into my bowl.
"Alex is coming home today," she says, typing something into her computer.
"Really?" I sit up straighter. She eyes me over the top of her glasses.
"Don't look so sad about it," she says, trying to hide her smile. I just look down at my cereal and spoon into my mouth. She continues typing on her computer and Lucas walks into the room. He hops onto the stool beside me and pours out cereal.
"Hey, Lukey," I say as he rubs his left eye.
"Hi, Nat. Mum, what're we doing today?" he asks, pouring in his milk.
"Well, first we're going to meet Alex at the airport, then we're all going to this aqua park together," she says.
"We are?" Lucas and I both ask. Mum nods and takes her computer into the other room, since we must obviously be distracting her. Lucas and I eat our breakfast until Paul comes in, grumbling about how Lucas woke him up. I roll my eyes and rinse my plate before taking the stairs two at a time to get to my room.
I shut the door behind me and walk into my closet. I hear Mum yell up the stairs, "Nat! Wear something nice!"
"Its the airport," I mumble under my breath and walk to the section of clothes I hate.
"We're going to lunch after!" she yells up. Oh, that's why.
I pick out some jeans and a white off the shoulder blouse and my sunnies. I put on the outfit and some studded earrings and some white joggers. I comb my hair and tie part of it into a bun.
Then I sit down on my bed and take out Percy Jackson: The lightning thief and start reading.
I think I read for about an hour and thurty minutes since before I know it I hear a knock on my door and it opens.
"Nat, honey?" I look up. Mum's head is poking through the doorway. "You ready to go?"
"Yup, I'll just get my phone," I say and grab it off my desk, shoving it into my pocket and following my mother out of the room.
We all pile into the car and set off.
"Nat, you should put on some make up," Mum says, turning around in her seat and looking at my outfit. I don't think she approves. I shake my head firmly and Mum glares at me.
"No! Please no!" I say quickly.
"Please? Just a little mascara?" she pleads. I shake my head firmly and we bicker for five minutes straight until I finally agree to some lipstick. She hands me a compact mirror and some pink lipstick. I glare at her and take them.
I put on the lipstick and see Mum looking smug in the rear view mirror. Then she turns around when I hand it back and says, "Now, that just looks weird, you need some mascara."
I glare at her again. This must've been her plan all along. She hands back the compact mirror and a black tube. I put it on and she turns around, giving me the 'you look ok' look. I narrow my eyes at the back of her head when she turns back around and take out my sunglasses, slipping them on and staring out the window.
***
We arrive at the airport a few minutes later. We all walk over to the Collins who are standing at the entrance of the airport. Leo and Callum are also with them along with...... Amanda.
"Amanda?" my mum asks when we reach the group. "Sweetie! I haven't seen you in so long."
"Hi Sarah," Amanda says before continuing to talk to Jackson, who has a 'I really don't want to be here right now' look on his face. Mum frowns a bit before turning to greet Michelle. I walk over to Felecia, Leo and Callum.
"Hey guys," I say, waving awkwardly.
"Nat! Thank God you're here, take the toddler," Felecia says handing Liam to me. "Wait, are you wearing make up."
"I was forced into it," I grumble. Lucas and Paul walk up next to me and say high to Felecia, who introduces them to Leo and Callum. Amanda walks up beside me and glares at me.
"What are you doing here?" she spits. I look down at my feet.
"My parents wanted us to come," I say. The others are having a conversation, and so Amanda steps in front of me.
"Listen here, you fat, ugly cow, if you lay a hand on my boyfriend ever again, I will make your life miserable. More miserable than it already is. You need to take the hint, sl**, he hates you. If you know what's best for you, you'd stay away," she hisses. I nod, biting my lip.
She quickly click-clacks off to talk to the adults. I re-join the conversation. I notice Leo and Callum giving me questioning glances and I just shrug at them.
"C'mon, kids," Jackson eventually says. Alex just texted. Everyone leaves except Amanda who pulls me back by the arm, her nails digging into my skin. She waits a few seconds for everyone to step inside before she turns me towards her.
"Stay out here, I don't want you seeing him before me," she says and leaves quickly. I sigh and walk over to the wall, taking my phone out of my pocket and playing a game. When I get bored, I slip my phone back into my pocket and look up at the clouds.
A crowd of boys walk past and see me. "Hey sexy!" one of them yells out. I look at them with a disgusted expression on my face. The guy winks at me. I try not to barf and look away.
People keep coming and going for about half an hour. I'm starting to get hot in the mid-spring heat, and I keep pulling my hair to one side since my neck is getting sweaty. I eventually take out my phone and the process is repeated, sans the perverted group of boys.
I'm just about to take my phone out again after about an hour when I hear running footsteps around the corner.
I turn my head to the side, still leaning it on the wall. Alex is standing there. He's wearing a pain or jeans and a white shirt, his leather jacket thrown over the top. His hair is messy and his sunglasses are propped on top of his head. He's eating a toothpick and I notice the light stubble on his face.
My mouth spreads into a smile before I can register what its doing. Alex smiles right back at me, taking the toothpick out. He throws it into a pot plant.
"Babe! Don't litter!" I say, pushing my self off the wall and walking over to the plant. I'm about to pick it up when his hands snake around my waist and he pulls me into him. I wrap my arms around his neck and bury my face in his shoulder. He rests his cheek on my head and I smell the intoxicating smell of his cologne and I try and breathe in lightly so that he won't know I'm smelling him.
We finally pull apart. "Mum said Amanda told her you'd been on the phone."
"Yeah, I was," I say. He moves his hands to my face and tilts it up so I'm looking at him square in the face.
"Is there something you're not telling me, dude?" he asks softly, his thumb gently rubbing against my cheek.
I look up at him and realize this is not staying away from him. I push him off me, untangling my arms from around his neck. I walk backwards and pick up the toothpick, quickly walking to the nearest bin and throwing it out.
I walk back to him and see the concern on his face. "What is it? Did something happen while I was gone?" he asks.
"No," I shake my head. "Why would you think that?"
"Because..." he trails off. I'd say the end of that sentence would be: you never move away from me when we're having a moment, you're always hanging around with me and now you don't want to. But he wouldn't admit that, it'd be too awkward.
I try and forget when our lips brushed two weeks ago. I almost kissed him. And I wanted to. But do I really want to be with someone who's willing to cheat on their girlfriend? What if he does that to me? I need to stay away from him. As far as I can with our houses next to each other. Along with our bedrooms.
"I'm just going to stay out here for a little while," I say. He looks at me with a confused look again before a muscle in his jaw clenches and he flips his sunglasses down over his eyes.
"Suit yourself," he says and walks away. I let out a sigh and lean against the wall again. I take out my phone and play games for the rest of my time waiting.
***
Lunch is awkward. We're all sitting at a large table, Callum and Leo have gone home for the day, but Amanda is still with us. Everyone's chatting away to different conversations. The mums are talking. The dads are talking. Amanda and Alex are talking. Felecia and the twins are talking. Everyone except me is talking. I'm just slowly eating my pasta, not saying a word. Michelle and Jackson asked me a couple of questions and I chatted with them for a little bit, but then I got rejected when they started talking about work and business and adult stuff.
Alex is sitting beside me with Amanda on his left. They're holding hands, too. We bumped knees once under the table and quickly moves our legs to opposite sides. I could feel the blush spread across my nose and cheeks while I ignored Alex's unwavering stare I felt burning into the side of my head. There was another incident when I reached for a garlic bread at the same time Alex did, and we brushed hands. After that I didn't touch anything. What'll be next? Slurping up the same piece of spaghetti? I think Felecia and Mum noticed the tension between us, but they didn't say anything.
Desert arrives later and I'm about to dig into my cheesecake when I hear my phone ping. I look around and check if anyone's watching before I pull my phone out of my back pocket. Its a message from an unknown number and I slide to open it, tapping the home button with my touch ID.
I wouldn't eat that if I were you.
I frown at the cheesecake before looking over at Amanda. One hand is still placed in Alex's while the other is slipping her phone into her handbag. I ask Dad if he wants to eat my desert and he happily agrees.
I can feel Alex's gaze in the back of my head and I turn my head to look at Liam in the high chair next to me. I play peek-a-boo with him until I feel a hand softly touch my waist. I blush slightly and turn around.
Alex has let go of Amanda's hand and is looking at me with a worried look. "You didn't eat your desert. Are you ok?" he asks.
"Just because I didn't eat desert doesn't mean I'm dying," I say harshly, crossing my arms over my chest. I'm about to say something else when I see Amanda glaring at me. I quickly continue to play the game with Liam.
We leave the restaurant at around one thirty. Amanda decides to return with Alex to his house so that she can come with us to the water park place.
We all go back to our separate houses to collect our bathing suits and towels before meeting on the path with two cars. Jackson says Alex can drive his own car with seven seats, including Liam's baby vessel thingo.
The adults go in Dad's car, and we follow them.
Amanda moves to go into the front but Alex stops her.
"I thought you'd like to sit with Liam, since you love him so much. Nat can sit shotgun," he says. Amanda's neutral scowling face quickly morphs into a mad expression.
"Its fine Alex," I sigh, opening the door to the middle and pulling forward the seat so the boys can jump in the back. "She's your girlfriend."
I look up at him as the boys clamber into the back. His jaw is clenching and there's hurt in his eyes. I look away and pull the seat up so I can get in. Felecia follows with Liam, who she hands to me, and I strap him in.
The trip is mostly silent, the boys and Felecia are having a quiet conversation and the music is playing some weird new pop song. Amanda and Alex don't speak, but I can feel him looking at me through the rear view mirror as I stare out the window, chewing on some extra with my sunglasses covering my eyes.
"Who wants McDonald's?" Alex asks after about five minutes. Paul, Felecia and Lucas all chorus: "me!" and Liam gives a little clap with his rattle toy and says , "ma."
Alex turns on his blinker and makes a right at the next exit. "Nat, can you text Dad?" he asks.
"No, no Alex, let me," Amanda says, trying to grab his phone out of his pocket for him. But he does it himself and hands it back to me.
"Nat knows my password," he says, looking at me through the rear view mirror. I grab his phone and make sure not to lock eyes with him. I don't know his password! I look up at him and he raises his eyebrows before looking back to the road. Amanda gives me a death glare when Alex isn't looking and Felecia flips her off.
I turn on his phone and see the picture of us on the lock screen. I quickly swipe and type in 0000. The phone opens and I look up at Alex when Amanda isn't watching. He grins at me through the mirror and I mouth, 'idiot' because it is a pretty stupid password.
I look back to his phone and see another picture of us on the home screen. If Amanda saw, she'd probably freak out. I quickly hit the message app and click on the 'Dad' contact typing in, Stopping at McDonalds. Cya there.
I don't know if that's what Alex would write, but I send it anyway. I return to the main page of messages and See my contact sitting at the top. I click on it and look at the contact picture. Its of me at that second modelling shoot. I'm making a face with my sunnies perched on top of my head with a straw in my mouth connected to a bottle of water. I don't remember when he took it, so I must've been thinking he was just playing or texting on his phone. My contact name is: Dude.
I click rename on the contact and name myself, Amazingly talented ambitious and beautiful dude called Natalie. And add a few emojis.
I switch the phone off and hand it back to Alex. He smiles at me and I quickly look away after seeing Amanda's glare.
We drive into the McDonald's drive thru and Alex asks everyone for their orders. I say I don't want anything when he addresses me and he gives me a skeptical glance. Amanda just looks smug.
Liam gets a happy meal toy from Lucas's meal - a cheeseburger and fries. Paul and Felecia both get nuggets and chips. Amanda gets a small packet of chips. Alex gets a Mcflurry, a Big Mac, a large fries and a coke.
I'm surprised when Alex hands me a packet. I take it hesitantly. "I didn't order anything."
He just shrugs and I open the bag. There's a lemonade, an Oreo McFlurry and a medium chips. Just what I would've wanted. I look up at Alex in the mirror and suppress a smile and he bites one back himself.
We eat our meals in silence with the music in the background until we arrive at the water park place. It's got about ten or twenty water slides/rides and two swimming pools, along with seven water obstacle courses.
We all pile out of the car and slam the doors. Alex locks the car and puts on his sunglasses. Jerk. He thinks he's so cool with his Ray Bans and lather jacket and hot girlfriend.
I walk beside Felecia and we talk about school and some random stuff. We meet the parents at the the entrance and Alex gets scolded for taking us to the McDonald's. We pay for our entrance and slip on some paper bands around our wrists.
I'm walking in after everyone else after checking a text from Adele when Alex slows down and walks beside me. I don't say anything. He takes my hand and pulls me over to the side. He leans on the wall next to the toilets and I stand awkwardly beside him.
"You're being weird," he states. I don't say anything, I just make a motion like 'we should go follow them.'
He pulls me back by the waist when I start to leave. He pulls me into him and I look up. "What's up?"
I look at our group's retreating backs. Amanda doesn't notice Alex is missing. I look back up at him. "I just... Why do you wanna hang out with me? I mean, don't you hate me?"
"What?" he asks. "Why the hell would I hate you?"
"I just thought..." I drone off. "Uhm... don't I annoy you?"
"What the heck? Are you serious, Nat? Why would you annoy me? You're just... you! You're beautiful, smart, funny, why would I hate you? God, Nat, you're f***ing awesome! I wouldn't ever want to be away from you! It was only two weeks, and I missed you like hell. I can't be away from you. When you weren't talking to me, it did annoy me, since you weren't around me. It was literally freaking only two weeks and I wanted you with me! I'm crazy Nat, I literally am! I don't hate you. Why the hell would you say that?"
I open my mouth to form an 'o'. Alex is breathing heavily after his small speech. Maybe Amanda typed those messages to herself and changed her contact name and deleted some texts. Alex isn't that good at acting. Its gonna be so hard to stay away from him. I might as well spend as much time with him as I can before Amanda and him break up. If I keep hanging with him when they're done, Amanda will attack me even more.
I put a hand on his cheek and feel the stubble there. "You need a shave."
He laughs at me and pulls my hand off his face. "I will."
He throws an arm around my shoulder and we walk off. We see the group sitting on the grass behind one of the swimming pools. Amanda is glaring at us. But I'll roll with the punches. It'll feel better if he's with me.
"Seriously though, if there's anything you need to tell me, you better say it now," he says. I side ways up at him. From under his sunglasses, his eyes search mine.
"No," I say. "There's nothing."
***
Mum packed the swim bag. I should've known she wouldn't have pack my swim shirt or one piece. Instead, she chose some kind of mesh-y aqua bikini thing that I didn't even know I owned.
I feel extremely uncomfortable. The bottoms are ok, since they're boyshorts. and they're also black. The top is one thing that's annoying me. Its tied together at the back. Its got straps holding it up and the bottom bit around my ribs is patterned with a black circle/geometric pattern. But that's not what's the most annoying. Its how much skin the thing reveals. Its not like I'm really pale, but I don't like showing this much... stuff. I don't have any bad tan lines or anything, but seriously, Mum could've picked something less revealing. I tie my towel around my like a dress, tucking in the corner. I really wish they had life jackets or something so that it could cover me.
I walk out of the change rooms and meet everyone else, holding the towel around me close. Amanda's wearing a very revealing red bikini. I walk up to Mum.
"Mum!" I hiss. She turns around.
"Yeah, honey?" she asks.
"This is.... disgusting!"Â I whisper-yell.
"Its not that bad, Natalie. It was on sale, and its in right now!" she says. I roll my eyes. I feel a presence behind me and spin around.
"What's in right now?" he asks, smirking down at me. I glare at him.
"Nat's bikini," Mum tells him.
"Bikini?" he asks and wiggles his eyebrows at me. I roll my eyes and shove his head back. My hand is off my towel and it chooses that moment to fall off. I quickly drop to the ground and pick it up.
Amanda glares at me. And I wrap the towel around my shoulders. Alex raises his eyebrows and smirks, propping his sunnies on top of his head.
"Shut up, babe," I say. He smiles and starts taking off his shirt. I look away.
Michelle hands Liam to me, who's got two lines of sunscreen on each cheek and a little baby cap with flaps blocking his face from the sun. He's got on a grey swim shirt with a foam shark fin on the back with blue shark board shorts.
I take him and Michelle says to Alex and I, "Make sure he stays safe! I'm trusting you two. Alex be good."
Alex rolls his eyes and turns his back on his mother. Amanda walks over. I busy myself in tickling Liam. I see Amanda whispering things in Alex's ear and trailing her hands down his chest to his six pack.
I look away and start singing 'baby shark' to Liam, moving him around to the beat of the song. His cute little smile is too adorable and I laugh when he does his little laugh.
I wrap my towel around my waist and prop Liam onto my waist, hoping to God he'll cover most stuff.
Liam throws his hands around my neck and his curls tickle the bottom of my chin. I run my hands through his hair. He giggles and leans his head on my collarbone.
"You're hair is just like your brother's," I say to him in a whisper, bouncing up and down so that he laughs a bit. Alex whips his head around, leaving Amanda with her lips in a kissing position, kissing thin air.
I look at him then flick my sunglasses down and walk after Felecia, Lucas and Paul. I throw my towel down beside the parents, since I can't go down water slides with it on. I quickly catch up to them and Lucas drags us over to some kind of ride, which has a small line waiting for it.
"What's this?" Felecia asks.
"I think its just a slide you go down with a double doughnut thing," Paul says. Alex and Amanda catch up to us.
"I'm not going on this," Amanda says. "My mascara might run."
Then why the hell are you at a water park?  I silently question. "What?" Alex asks, giving her a confused look. "All the rides are water rides."
Amanda shrugs and kisses him for a while before winking at him and walking off. I don't know, but I swear I see him roll his eyes.
"I'll go with you," he says and hooks an arm around my waist.
"No thank you," I say. "I'm going with Felecia."
Alex pouts. "Its fine, you two go together, Liam might vomit, and I don't want that on me," Felecia says.
I make a face and look down at Liam, who's resting his little hands on my chest along with his head, eyes open, mouth stretched into a smile. I shuffle him a bit and he moves his head and closes his eyes. I look at Alex.
"He's got your eyes," I say.
Alex looks at me with an expression I can't place. He tightens his hold around my waist. "You're wearing a bikini," he says.
"Yes, I am," I say grouchily and slouch a bit.
"No, it looks good on you, so don't slouch," he says, looking straight ahead. I look at him with a funny expression, but he doesn't look. I shrug and turn back.
Finally, we're allowed to go up the stairs, and Alex carries our inflatable up the stairs, since I'm carrying Liam, and he insisted.
We put our double doughnut in the water atop the slide. I hand Liam to Alex. "If he pukes, its on you."
He shakes his head, taking the baby and smiling. I get into the hole bit and wait for Alex to get in. The people on the top push us off and we go sliding down the slide.
Amanda is missing out. Its fun.
***
After around fifteen rides and a turn on the obstacle course, along with a relay race in one of the pools.
Amanda didn't touch the water at all, and when we all came back Michelle asked why (nicely, of course, as she always is) and Amanda just shrugged.
We all walk out of the place together. Alex slows down in front of me and lifts me up onto his back. I laugh and he piggy-backs me the whole way to the cars. Amanda glares at me when no one's looking, but I haven't been piggy backed in years, and its fun.
We ride home, in the cars our family have, not kids and parents. I get home and unpack my bag. I take a shower and slip into some sweatpants and a baggy hoodie. Then I jump over the railing onto Alex's balcony and opening his unlocked door.
The curtains are closed and I walk through them. What an idiot I am. The curtains were closed for a reason, obviously.
Amanda's lying on top of Alex. His shirt is off and hers is half unbuttoned. They're kissing on his bed and haven't noticed me yet. Maybe Amanda has actually, and she's kissing him for that reason.
I can't compare to her. Me, just standing here with my knotty hair undone and my baggy hoodie and sweat pants on. And then there's her, queen bee, popular, pretty, his girlfriend.
They haven't noticed me, so I slowly back out, but I trip over a pen left on the floor. Alex pushes Amanda off him and props himself up on his elbows and he looks at me.
"Nat?" an emotion crosses over his face and if I didn't know better I'd think its sadness, but obviously, I do, its probably just confusion.
"Sorry, I thought you were sleeping or something," I say and duck through the curtains.
"No, Nat! Wait!" he calls after me, but I'm already up on his railing, leaping over and locking my door and closing the curtains so he doesn't see my pacing.
This is a very unknown emotion to me. I've never really been jealous, especially not because of a guy. But it hurts and its not good.
I need to remind myself that she's his, and I won't ever be her.
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heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeyyyyyylo
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