Chapter 49: Like a Hurricane

I'm so startled I drop my towel and the locket. It lands on the ground with a bang. The sound brings me back to life.

What the actual nugget farts?

What is happening?

How is this happening?

This cannot be happening!

My heart keeps pounding against my chest and I turn to look behind me, as though he might be there. He's not. He's carrying on as he usually would down at the creek. As though everything's normal.  As though everything is fine. Everything is not fine.

I bend down, picking up the towel and locket. I stare at it. Is there a chance that he didn't know what the locket contained? He can't have. Right?

I turn the locket over. There's a picture of us engraved on the pack. Not in colour, just etchings of our faces, smiling brightly together. I stare at the picture, tracing my fingers over his face. I thought this locket was expensive, I just didn't know how expensive.

I start walking towards the creek again, clipping the locket back onto my neck and shutting it. I walk back down to the place in a daze.

Does he love me?

No. Damn. Way.

Damn, I have so many questions.

I emerge into the clearing and see him sitting in the sand, playing with the sand and some sticks like a four-year-old. He looks up.

"Naw, C'mon," he whines. "I liked you better in a bikini."

Usually, I would shove him.. but not now. I nod awkwardly and sit down on the grass. I start twiddling with my locket, but then remember what it contains. I awkwardly put my hands down at my sides, playing with the sand.

"Well," he says, looking suspicious. "Let's eat."

I nod and he pulls out two sandwiches, two Fanta's and two cupcakes Felecia and Mum made.

"Alex-" I start.

"Eat some!" he says shoving a sandwich straight into my mouth. I laugh, which makes me want to cry at the same time. We eat out meals in silence until Alex finishes, wrapping his arms around his legs and looking up at the sky.

"It's so beautiful," he whispers.

"Yeah," I say quietly.

"Just like you," he says. Almost too casually. Without looking at me. I look down at the ground and play with the sand. God, I'm hysterical. He looks back to me, placing a hand underneath my chin gently. "Is there anything wrong?"

"No," I say quietly, shaking my head.

"Then why would be waste the perfect opportunity to go swimming?" he asks happily, standing up and offering me a hand. I take it, setting down my half-eaten cupcake and standing up. Thank God I still feel like eating.

WARNING: FIFTY SHADES OF GREY IS COMING UP. SKIP IF YOU'RE INNOCENT AND EASILY DISGUSTED... SKIPPPPP.

We walk into the water. Alex dives under and comes up, shaking his head like a dog. I smile a bit.  He walks over to me.

"C'mon Nat, what's up?" he asks. When I don't reply, he takes me by the hands. "Do I have to dance with you to make  you happy?"

I roll my eyes. He starts moving our hands back and forth slowly. "Do do do do do do," he sings slowly, playfully. I try to roll my eyes but a smile gets in the way and I give up. He grins and starts moving our hands faster. Then he pulls me into him and wraps an arm around my waist, the other still holding my hand.

I lay my head on his shoulder, forgetting about the locket for one second. "This is so weird."

"I don't care. So long as you're being weird with me," he whispers into my ear. I sigh.

"Alex, I-"

"Yeah?" he asks, his blue eyes looking down at me. I take my hand off his shoulder and my other out of his. "What's wrong, Dude? You're not acting like your usual, amazing self."

"Alex, please. I told you yesterday to stop being so damn sweet! You don't have to do anything to impress me! You already do! You freaking packed us lunch because you wanted to! Not because you wanted to impress me, but because that's who you are! You buy me way too much stuff, babe! I don't need it! I've already got you! You don't have to use cringy pickup lines on me to make me love you!" I say. His bottom lip drops so he's gaping slightly.

"Nat-" he starts, but I interrupt him.

"Alex... the locket..." I say. His eyes widen. I don't finish my sentence. He pulls me into him.

"I love you," he whispers. My heart rate starts to increase as I look into his eyes. They're soft but hard at the same time.

Before I can open my mouth to reply. He tightens his hold on my waist and crashes his lips into mine. I'm shocked, not moving.

And then I wake up. Alex is kissing me. Alex freaking Collins.

I wrap my arms around his neck and kiss him back. His lips are soft but kind of chapped. They taste salty because of the water, but I don't care. I don't care about anything anymore. Only that Alex is kissing me.

I close my eyes and move my lips along with his. Dayummmmmm, he's a good kisser. It felt like he'd transported me into fairyland and possibly into the best moment of my life. He tastes like mint and sugar. He moves his lips roughly against mine, as though he's been waiting for this moment as much as I had.

I pull him into me further and move my hands to cup his face. He responds by pulling me into his chest so there's barely any space left between us. I can barely focus on anything except him. He bites down on my bottom lip and my mouth parts.

He moves his tongue into my mouth and I move my hands back to where they were before threading my fingers through his hair. He smiles against my lips and kisses me harder.

I tugged on his hair gently and he moans against my lips. I smile and he moves a hand up to hold my cheek. I move one of my hands out of his hair as the other falls lifelessly behind him. I pull his hand off my cheek and he slows the kiss down. I kiss him once more before pulling away and letting out a sob.

"Alex," I cry.

"Nat? Nat? What's wrong?" he's quick to move both his hands up to cup my face. That only makes me cry harder. He gently wipes my tears away with his thumbs. "Baby, what is it?"

The word 'baby' makes more tears pour down my cheeks. He wipes them off with ease, his eyes searching mine. I put my hands over his and pull them down. "Alex," I sob. "W-we c-can't."

'What?" he moves his hands up to my neck and stares at me blankly. "WHAT?"

"I - I don't-" I hiccup. He puts a finger over my mouth and silences me.

"Before you say what I know you're going to say... Do you remember when you promised me that you'd do anything for me? When I gave you my jacket?" he asks. I nod. "Does that offer still stand?"

I bite my lip. "Yes."

"Anything?" he whispers.

"Anything," I nod.

He pulls me back into him and kisses me so aggressively the only thing that keeps me standing is the arms that he's wrapped tightly around my waist. I wrap my arms around his neck and thread a hand through his hair, tugging on it. He moans again and I let him slide his tongue into my mouth and groan when he bites down on my bottom lip. He kisses me for a while before I pull away to catch my breath. I lean my forehead against his, breathing heavily. He's doing the same.

"Nat," he whispers. I close my eyes, letting a tear roll down my cheek.

"We can't," I say. "We're just friends."

"You can't say that!" he yells. "You can't! I'm in love with you, Dude! I cannot be away from you. And you kissing me back just says otherwise! We're not just friends, Nat! We can never be just friends. You're far too goddamn beautiful and funny and kind and smart. God, I was such an idiot to think someone like you would want someone like me!"

"Alex, Alex, babe," I say, pulling his face back towards mine with my hands. "You're amazing. You wouldn't ever want someone like me. You're way too good for me. There's a girl out there -" I sob, stroking his cheek with my thumb. "There's a girl out there who'll make you so, so, happy. But I'm not her. I'm sorry."

"Yes. Yes, Nat! You are! You make me happier then I've ever been before, don't you understand that?" he asks, pulling out of my hold to grip my hands. "I'm addicted to you. I'm in love with you!"

"Alex," I sob, my tears pouring down my face like a hurricane. "We can't."

"Yes. We can. We can, Nat! Baby, please just give me a chance," he pleads. I cry harder.

"We're just friends Alex. I'm sorry," I say, pulling out of his hold. I unclip the necklace and put it in his hands, closing his fingers around it. I walk away. My tears fall like rain and I cry all the way up to the house.

No one's home. I retire to my room and scream into my pillow.

That stupid stupid stupid boy.

***

Alex's POV

"F**K!" I yell when I'm sure she's safely a hundred feet away. My voice echoes around the small space and I trudge out of the water. I look at her half-eaten cupcake and the locket in my hand. I pull the two edges apart and stare at the three words engraved into it before flipping it over and tracing her features with my finger.

I'm so freaking stupid. Though her tears told me otherwise, she doesn't love me.  She totally rejected me. I don't blame her. I'm a bloody idiot. Never ever in my life will I ever be able to have her. She's too pure. Too good.

I sigh and cradle my head in my hands. The only sound is the pitter-pattering of the small waterfall. I close my eyes.

The only thing I can think about is the way she tasted. How good her lips felt against mine. Her eyelashes glittering with moisture as she stared up at me. I curse under my breath a few times before opening my eyes again and looking up.

She's not standing there begging for mercy. She's not next to me with her head on my shoulder. And she's definitely not wearing my clothes that somehow managed to turn me on way too hard. I groan and lay back on the sand.

I'm a bloody, f***ing idiot.

_________________________________________________________________________

EW. EW. EW. EW. EW. EW.

OK. SO. THIS. WAS. THE. MOST. DISGUSTING. THING. I. HAVE. EVER WRITTEN. IN. MY. LIFE.

SORRY. I WAS AVOIDING IT FOR WAY TOO LONG SO #NOREGRETS!/ #IHAVESOOOMANYREGRETSI'MJUSTGONNAPRETENDTHISNEVERHAPPENED

DOUBLE UPDATE!

Are you proud of me? (for the double update... not the other... stuff.. ek)

Sorry, this chapter was only 1800 words... The next few will have more.

I'm gonna go. heh. Don't think any less of me people. I am not gone yet. There's still more to come (hopefully less gross stuff)

byeeeeeeeeee

-you're very ashamed of herself Abbey