23.Powerless

Joel

''What do you mean you got zero points?" father yells and the three of us flinch.

''I... I don't know...I did all of the questions, but I don't...'' Luke stutters trying to answer.

"Shut up. I don't want your explanations.'' father yells raisin to his feet. ''I didn't send you to that school to embarrass me for God's sake! I sent you there to ruin the Meyers. And all of you disappointed me. You disappoint me in every way you could.'' he says, and needles pinch my chest.

''Lucy Meyer gets a hundred points and my son gets zero? Are you that stupid?'' he yells.

''Father, I...''

"Shut up, I don't want to hear your voice.''

''How can't you beat two small stupid girls? Two dump girls who have no idea what life is, and yet they still rule in that school. You spent all of your life preparing for this moment. Preparing to ruin them. And now that that moment came, you're not doing anything. Why? Because the three of you are too weak and too nice.'' he says, his voice full of hate.

Something in my heart twists. It's like an invisible knife stabbing me in my heart and then being twisted in its way out.

''We're not nice.'' I swallow.

''Oh, really Joel? You're not nice?" he asks laughing humorlessly.  ''Then why aren't you doing anything to Olivia Meyer? Why are you showing mercy to her?"  he yells.

"I'm not showing mercy to her.'' I quietly say.

''Prove it.'' he says, his voice calm and my blood runs cold.

I look at him in confusion.

''By the end of this week I want the Meyers ruined and you have to show me that you don't have mercy for Olivia Meyer.'' he looks at me with challenge in his eyes.

He comes closer to me and grabs my shirt. "Stop being nice to the Meyers and show them who the real Cullens are. Love is for the weak ones, son, do you hear me? Don't let it control you.

Ruin the Meyers. Ruin Olivia. Show me that you are a Cullen.'' he says, and I nod.

Love is for the weak ones.

Don't let it control you.

''Are Christian's daughters better than you Avril?'' father asks Avril in a sudden.

She looks at him in fear and doesn't answer.

''Answer me! Are they better than you?" he yells.

"N-no.'' she stutters.

''No, they're not. You're so much better than them.  They are princesses but you are a queen!'' he says. ''Stop hiding and start being a Cullen. You're born to be a leader, never forget that.''

Avril nods over and over and raises her chin.

''Luke.'' he calls.

"Yes, father.''

"Come to your senses'' he says, '' Start working smart and beat Lucy Meyer. Destroy the Meyers.''

"Yes father.''

I'm sick of this.

I'm sick of being someone I'm not.

I'm sick of trying to be his perfect child and still can't reach his expectations.

I'm sick of being a disappointment.

I'm sick of being afraid I'm not doing enough to deserve my last name.

This last name is too heavy on my shoulders.

Avril touches my hands and I realize that they have turned red because I'm scratching them with my nails.

''This is the last time I say it. By the end of this week, I want the Meyers ruined, especially Olivia Meyer.'' he looks at me. '' I don't care what you will do, I only care one thing, them being ruined. Understood?"

"Yes father.'' the three of us say.

''Luke.'' he calls.

"Yes father?"

"Go to your room.''

No.

''Yes father.''

No, no, no.

He can't do that.

I have to do something.

I have to speak.

But there's a lump in my throat and it's not letting me speak.

Stop, I want to say to him.

You can't do this to us, I want to scream at him.

Treat us more as your kids, I want to shout at him.

But as always, I said nothing.

As always, I stay here and watch.

As always, I stay silent.

This, my dear friends, is being powerless.

Power is a huge thing.

Without it, you're nothing.

I look at Luke and he's standing there emotionless.

Not any trace of emotion is traced on his face.

Not fear, not anger, not hate.

Nothing.

''If I see any grade below a hundred again, we will have problems. Got it?" he says.

"Yes, father.'' Luke answers.

''You're all free to go.'' he says.

We nod and walk toward the door of his studio.

''Joel.'' he calls when I reach the door.

Don't disappoint me.

''Stop this stupid game you're playing with Olivia Meyer and stay away from her. Your only job is to destroy her not anything else. Start being her real enemy and show her that you are a Cullen not some dump Loverboy.'' he says.

For once in my lifetime, I didn't predict my father's words.

''Yes father.'' I say swallowing.

He knows.

Why am I surprised?

''Joel, honey?'' my mom's voice comes through my room's door. I take a deep breath and regulate my emotions.

''Yes mom?" I say trying to make my voice sound nice.

"May I come in?'' she asks, her voice insecure.

"Yeah.'' I say and sit straight on my bed.

She comes inside and sits on my bed, close to me.

She kisses my cheek and hugs me.

My mom loves us, I know it.

She tries to protect us, but she can do nothing in front of our father.

So, she waits until he finishes yelling at us and then comes in each of our room's, trying to make us feel better.

Just like now.

''I love you, my baby, you know that right?" she says.

"Yeah mom, I know. I love you too.'' I say hugging her back.

''Don't be mad at your father, okay? He loves you so much and he tries to protect you, in his own way.'' she says stroking my hair.

"It doesn't seem like that to me.'' I sigh.

''Oh, but it is Joel.'' she says and kisses my forehead. ''Your father is trying so hard to protect you and he's scared. That's why he acts that way.''

''Protect us from what?" I ask.

''Oh, honey there are so many things that you don't know.'' she says with a glint of sadness.

"Tell me then.'' I say my voice vulnerable. ''Tell me mom.''

''I can't'' she says. ''You'll hate me if I tell you.''

My brows furrow.

''Why would I hate you mom? '' I hug her, ''I love you so much, I would never hate you.''

"Really?" she asks her eyes shining with tears.

I nod and kiss her forehead.

''Don't hate your father either. He's a good man and he loves you three so much.'' she says.

Sometimes we want to see the good in people we love the most that we even pretend that is there, living in all the layers of cruelty.

That's what my mother does.

She believes it too much that our father is a good person.

But he's not.

Or maybe he was when she met him.

Growing richer and gaining enemies made him the man he is today.

I'm not a fan of this version.

''Don't be mad at him, okay?" she says at me.

"I won't.'' I lie.

There is no point arguing with her.

She believes in him too much.

And it's too hard to make a person change his mind when he believes in something.

''I want to talk to Luke too.  But I'm not allowed to see him.'' she says sad, ''But it's okay I'll talk to him tomorrow.''

You'll talk to him when father allows him to get out of his room.

I don't say that to her.

It would break her heart.

Mom gets out of my room with a goodnight kiss.

I wait until the lights are all out and everyone is asleep and walk out of my room.

Turning on my phone's flashlight I tiptoe downstairs toward the kitchen.

I don't turn on the lights because it might alert my father.

I enter the kitchen and head toward the fridge, getting the dinner's leftovers I close the fridge and turn around.

Right when I turn around, I see a person standing in front of me with the phone's flashlight in front of his face.

I jump, scared and almost drop the plate I'm holding.

Avril jumps too and her phone falls from her hands.

The sound of it echoes in the silence.

Holy fuck she scared the fuck out of me!

''Shhh, are you crazy?" I whisper.

"You scared me, idiot.'' she says picking up her phone.

''I scared you? You were standing in front of me like a ghost. Who keeps their phone flashlight like that?" I whisper yell and she rolls her eyes.

''Do you have the key?" I ask her.

"Yes.'' she answers.

"Good, let's go.''

We walk quietly upstairs and head toward Luke's room.

Avril gets the key out of her pocket and opens the door.

And yes, we do have other keys for our rooms.

Secret ones.

''Finally.'' Luke says getting up from his bed. ''I'm starving.''

"I'm sorry.''' I say and give him the plate with food.

This is our father's detention.

You get to eat only one meal, which is lunch. You're not allowed to get out of your room. No phones, no TV, no technology. And no one gets to see you.

It's like being in jail.

''Bro, how is it possible you got zero points? You're a genius in math!'' Avril says.

''I have no idea. I answered all of the questions, and I was sure they were correct.'' he answers while eating.

"But how is it possible you got zero?" I ask and he shrugs.

He said he did all of them, so how...

Oliva being at Luke's class comes in my mind.

And she was hiding something behind her back.

Fucking of course!

How can I be so stupid?

''The Meyers did it.'' I say raising at my feet.

"Huh?" Luke looks up at me.

''She did it. She replaced Luke's homework with the wrong one.'' I say.

"Well, of course.''  Avril says angry.

"Lucy?" Luke says his voice cold.

"Olivia.'' I say, her name sounding bitter in my voice, ''But Lucy might be in it too.''

"She wouldn't do that.'' he says.

"Yes, she would. She's a fucking Meyer!" Avril says.

''Father is right.'' Avril says pacing around the room, ''We were too nice with them. It's time to show them what we can really do.''

I nod.

''Wait, we're not sure if it was them.'' Luke says.

"Oh, trust me, it was them.'' I say.

''We're going to destroy them and you're going to do nothing to stop us, okay Luke?'' Avril asks him and he nods.

''Good. So tomorrow we start showing them who the Cullens are.'' she says.

''Yes.'' I say.

It's time to show this sweet Olivia who the real Joel Cullen is.

The one for her to fear and fully hate.

She's that cute little princess living under her father's kingdom, but I'm going to destroy everything around her until she's all alone.

I'm not the prince who saves the princess, but the villain who will ruin her.

I'm going to ruin every part of her, until there is nothing left.

I was born a villain.

My father is raising me to be a villain.

A little princess can't change who I am.

Enjoy those good days left, princess, darkness is coming for you.

My phone vibrates in my pocket, and I get it out to check the message.

Katrina sent you a message.

All about time.