Chapter 16

Helen was glad that she had told Alice the truth about her relationship with Ralph. Alice had listened sympathetically to her confession without feeling the need to pass judgement. Even though she was a countess and lived her life within the bounds of polite society, she was not critical of those who did not. She had offered Helen what she needed more than anything else; her friendship. Helen knew that it was not an offer that had been made glibly or in the heat of the moment. Alice was a woman of her word and would not break a promise once pledged.

After the confession had been made and both women had sheds tears and comforted each other with a sisterly embrace, the mood in the bedchamber soon lightened. She was not ashamed of becoming Ralph's mistress, it was no worse than anything else she had done in the past. In fact, she was looking forward to spending time alone with him. There were certain advantages in being a rich gentleman's mistress. One still maintained a level of independence that one could never have had within the bounds of a respectable marriage. She was going to enjoy every second of their time together while it lasted.

Whether it was the effects of the tea that had been generously laced with brandy or Alice's amusing anecdotes, they were soon giggling again like schoolgirls. Alice was a never-ending supply of diverting stories about her past.

'I sees you two are enjoying yourselves,' Phyllis said, as she entered the bedchamber, 'I can hear you cackling all the way down the corridor. It's six o'clock and its high time the both of yous got ready.'

'Come on, Helen,' Alice said as she stood up and stretched, 'you cannot disobey a direct command from my dear Phyl.'

As Helen stood up, she felt a little light-headed from the effects of the brandy. She rarely drank alcohol, and it had made her feel pleasantly giddy. She steadied herself using the back of the chair as a support. 'Do excuse me,' she said laughing, 'I think I have drunk a little too much brandy.'

'So have I,' Alice said, as she walked across the room towards the full-length mirror. 'I blame you, Helen. You are a bad influence on me.'

'You were the one who suggested the brandy,' Helen said with mock indignation.

'So I did,' Alice said. 'Therefore, I conclude that it was an excellent suggestion.'

Helen watched with amusement while Alice put a blanket over the mirror. 'Why are you covering the mirror?' she asked curiously.

'There will be no peeping,' she said, her voice a command. 'I want the dress to be a surprise.'

An hour later, after Phyllis had laced them into their stays and had arranged their hair in the most fashionable styles, Helen sat exhausted on the bed. Alice was the first to don her dress. It was a gorgeous rich cobalt blue that matched the vibrant blue of her eyes and the enormous sapphires that sparkled brightly around her neck. As she stood in the centre of the chamber, she looked every inch the regal countess.

'What do you think?' Alice said as she twirled around to let Helen see the back.

'You look sensational,' she said.

'My dear Helen, just wait until you see your dress,' she replied excitedly. 'Now stand up,' she ordered, 'it's your turn.'

Helen stood up and walked over to Alice. 'Turn around,' Alice said, as she lightly tied a blindfold that Helen suspected to be a silk stocking, around her eyes. 'I told you,' Alice said sassily, 'I want no peeping.'

Helen had not seen the material since the night Alice and Phyllis had come to her room to make the initial measurements. A few days later, when she had had a fitting, Alice had also insisted that she wore a blindfold. She had known then by the soft, sleek texture of the material that it was of the highest quality and must have cost Alice a small fortune.

Phyllis and Alice carefully put the dress over Helen's head, protecting the sheer material from the elaborate hairstyle Phyllis had constructed. The silk felt smooth and sleek to the touch, and Helen felt a strange, almost sensual feeling flutter through her, as the silk glided down her body towards the floor. Then, she felt Phyllis lace the back of the dress and arrange the skirts.

'Phyl,' she heard Alice say, 'be a dear and fetch my drop pearl pendant.' She then felt Alice's deft fingers fasten the pendant around her neck. 'Perfect,' she heard Alice say at last.

'Am I allowed to look?' Helen said, 'I feel like I am about to play a game of blind man's bluff!'

'Yes, I think we are ready,' Alice said.

'I'll go an uncover the mirror,' Phyllis said as she walked across the chamber.

She felt the blindfold loosen and fall away from her eyes.

Helen's eyes widened as she clasped her hands to her chest when she saw a stranger looking back at her.

'I told you, Phyl,' Alice said triumphantly, 'that silk was made for Mrs Wakefield.'

Alice was right. The vibrant, almost orange, bronze silk that shimmered gold in the candlelight, suited her complexion perfectly. 'I...I don't know what to say,' Helen stammered, as she admired the workmanship that had gone into its creation.

'I am very pleased that Phyl did not add any frills or flounces. I always say that you cannot beat a plain well-cut dress, made from the finest material. Though I am glad, I managed to persuade her to lower the neckline and make the dress a little more risque. You have such a lovely décolletage, and it would be a shame to hide it away.'

The neckline had indeed been cut lower than she had expected. She suspected that Alice had not made that suggestion in front of her because she would have complained. Indeed, any lower, and the dress would have been deemed scandalous. The single pearl pendant lent to her by Alice, rested just above the cleft of her breasts, drawing one's eye to their firm mounds that had been further augmented by her stays. She had become so used to wearing dowdy, unfashionable clothes that she had forgotten what it was like to wear a gown like this. It gave her a feeling of sensuality that she had not felt for years. It had been just another emotion she had buried from the world.

'Thank you,' Helen said, her voice unsteady, 'both of you. It is so lovely. I do not deserve such kindness.'

'Nonsense,' Alice said firmly. 'I want no tears. Splashes of water will only ruin your lovely dress.' She went over to Helen and enveloped her in her arms. 'Now, now,' she said softly, 'you'll start me off, and that will never do.' She released Helen and smoothed the wrinkles from her own skirts. 'Anyway,' she said brightly, 'Phyllis and I enjoyed the project immensely, didn't we Phyl.'

'That we did, your ladyship,' Phyllis said proudly, 'I likes nothing more than to dress a woman with a good figure.'

'I don't know how to repay you,' Helen said, still looking with awe at her reflection.

'Now, Helen,' Alice said earnestly, taking her hands in hers. 'There is something that you can do for me. Well, actually, two things.'

Helen smiled. 'Name them, and they shall be done.' Helen knew from the saucy smile on Alice's lips that they would be impertinent requests.

'First,' she said, in a commanding voice, 'I want you to dance every set, including the waltzes. Second,' she stopped and looked at Helen, there was a sparkle of mischief in her eyes, 'I want you to have an assignation in the garden with a certain gentleman, who will remain nameless. There is nothing more romantic than a stroll in the moonlight with the man you love. You must, at the very least, kiss him.'

Helen smiled. 'Only if you will do the same,' she replied.

'That, my dear,' Alice said laughing, 'is a deal.'

'If you go off sneaking into the garden with his lordship,' Phyllis chimed in, 'mind you don't ruin that lovely dress. I dread to think about what you got up to last time, but I could not save the yellow silk from ruin.'

'What I get up to with his lordship is my own affair,' Alice said tartly. 'And, if I ruin a dress in the process, so be it!'

Phyllis looked a little crestfallen at the rare rebuke dealt out by her mistress. 'I suggest,' Alice said softly, 'that you enjoy the rest of the evening.'

Phyllis blushed and smiled. 'Yes, my lady,' she said, 'but what about tonight. Won't you be needing me later.'

'Neither his lordship nor myself, will require your services,' Alice said imperiously, 'now go and enjoy yourself.'

'Yes, my lady,' she said as she curtsied.

Helen had been true to her word. She had danced every set in the arms of a different gentleman. When she had been standing at the edge of the ballroom, at the beginning of the evening, she did not think that she would be asked to dance. It was well known that she was the companion of Lady Helford, and everyone knew that companions sat at the sidelines observing. However, in her dashing new gown, and with the confident Lady Emley standing by her side, she had been inundated with offers.

She had remembered, with pleasure, the look of disbelief on Ralph's face when she had descended the stairs with Alice. When he had kissed her fingers, she had seen them sparkle with desire. The combination of his gentle touch and the intense passion in his grey eyes had sent a pleasurable wave of warmth through her. Even through the material of her gloves, his touch could elicit a response deep within her.

Later, at the side of the ballroom just before the first set had begun, he had asked her to waltz with him. Even though Alice had forced his hand, she knew that he had been looking for an excuse to ask her himself.

Lady Helford, who was sitting with the other dowagers, looked on with deep disapproval. She had tried several times to get Helen to leave the growing court of gentleman admirers that had gathered around Alice and herself. However, Alice, in her usual style, had quashed the indomitable Lady Helford's plans.

After an energetic set of country dances, Helen was escorted back to Alice, who was still at the side of the ballroom. As usual, Alice was surrounded by her admirers and was amusing everyone with her wit. Tom, who had danced the opening set with Helen, had disappeared into the card room as soon as it was over. He seemed to be quite happy to allow his vivacious wife to be the centre of attention while he melted into the background. Helen could see no reason for him to be jealous, Alice only had eyes for him.

'You look like you are having a wonderful time,' Alice said, 'I told you you would dance every set.'

Helen nodded. 'I am quite exhausted,' she said breathlessly.

'I hope you are not too exhausted. The next dance is the waltz. Ah! Perfect timing. Here comes Tom and Huntingdon. I knew they would not forget.'

The magnificent ballroom and the rest of the guests melted away when she saw Ralph coming towards her. He was looking extraordinary elegant, dressed in black and white evening clothes.

'My waltz,' he said, as he took her hand and led her to the dancefloor.

He had placed one of his hands on her waist and took her left hand in the other. He held her so close that she was aware of her skirts brushing against his legs. The wonderful sensation of the rippling silk caused a frisson of gentle heat to pulse delicately through her.

'You must forgive me if I am a little rusty, but I have not waltzed for years.'

He smiled warmly into her eyes. 'Do not worry, my love,' he said softly so no one could hear the endearment, 'it is a little like swimming. One never forgets how it's done.'

A flush crept into her cheeks, as he referred to the afternoon they had spent together at the lake. She remembered how he had held her close when they had been in the water, their desire soon overtaking them. During those blissful hours, she had certainly not had the chance to discover whether she could still swim.

The music started, and he led her expertly across the ballroom. He was right. She had not forgotten how to waltz, and soon she had lost herself in the magic of the moment. As he expertly twirled her around the edge of the ballroom, light from the candles, split into a multitude of colours, making her feel delightfully giddy. As he guided her around the corners, he held her close. And, for a moment, their bodies pressed together, sending more shards of pleasure coursing through her.

Helen did not care what the other guests, including her employer, Lady Helford, thought. She was living in the moment and had no intention of spoiling such a glorious evening.

As the music drew to a close and the dance slowed, Helen felt the cool evening air on her cheeks. She opened her eyes and saw that Ralph had led her onto the terrace. When they were outside, he let go of her waist and took her hand in his. 'Come, follow me,' he said, with a sense of urgency in his voice, 'we do not have much time.'

They quickly walked across the terrace and down the steps into the garden below. There were several other couples walking arm in arm around the lit gravel paths, but Ralph led her away from the lights to the deserted part of the garden. They eventually reached the seclusion of the enclosed rose arbour. Even though the summer was nearly at an end, the garden was full of the floral scent of the beautiful flowers. Helen found the whole experience intoxicating.

Ralph led her into a recess that was shielded from the rest of the garden. The moon was bright and illuminated the roses with a silvery brilliance that gave them an ethereal, unworldly quality. Alice was right, there was indeed nothing more romantic than a stroll in the moonlight with the man you loved.

'You are so beautiful,' he said, his voice a deep whisper, as he tilted her head towards him. 'You took my breath away when I saw you descending the staircase this evening.'

'Do you like my gown?' she said coquettishly, as she wound her arms around his neck, 'it was a gift from Alice.'

'I prefer what's underneath,' he said, with a grin, looking down at her décolletage.

He was so close that she could smell the expensive masculine cologne that he wore. As she breathed in his heady scent, every nerve in her body seemed to come alive with anticipation. She closed her eyes and savoured the gentle touch of his fingers as they ran down her neck, across her collar bone to the neckline of her gown. Her breathing became ragged as his fingers traced the line where flesh met silk. His gentle touch slowly lingered as he reached the firm mounds of her breasts, and she took in a sharp intake of breath as her body responded.

Gentle waves of pleasure rippled through her as his lips grazed the base of her neck and slowly moved up towards her ear. 'Exquisite,' he whispered, his voice low and husky, 'absolutely exquisite.' The sound of his voice sent a shiver of blissful warmth down her spine to the core of her femininity.

If Helen could have stopped time and preserved that moment forever, she would have done so. It was perfect. The combination of the distance sound of chatter from the dining-room, the silvery moonlight and the scent of the roses mingled with his cologne, gave the moment a magical feel.

He lifted his head and looked at her, desire smouldering in his eyes. Her hands caressed the back of his neck as she savoured his touch. His hand that had been tracing the outline of her breasts slipped slowly down her body to her hips. Pools of liquid heat continued to ripple through her as he pulled her closer, so her body was flush against his.

She relaxed as she felt his lips kiss the sensitive flesh of her neck just below the ear. The moment felt perfect, just as Alice had told her it would be.

'We will have to go soon,' he said softly, breaking the kiss.

'Not yet,' she said, desperation creeping into her voice.

She turned around in his arms so that her back was against his chest. His hands rested lightly on her hips, and his cheek touched hers. They both looked up at the night's sky, towards the large full moon that was surrounded by a myriad of stars. 'It's wonderous,' she said in an awed whisper.

She felt him draw her closer, as they continued to gaze at the night sky. 'Ralph,' she said regretfully, 'I wish this moment could last forever.'

She felt a sensation at odds with the elation she had just experienced. It was a strange feeling and one she did not like. A cold fear, with its icy tentacles, had begun to wrap itself around her heart. Where a moment ago, she had felt an unbridled joy, she now felt sorrow and loss creeping in to replace them. She tried to ignore the feeling of foreboding that she now felt. What if she were to lose him now? What if after tonight, she would never see him again? She felt a wild, uncontrollable need to feel him close welling up within her.

'Ralph,' she said, as she turned back to face him, 'before we go, kiss me one more time.'

When their lips met, Helen could not help but think that this would be their last kiss. To drive out the fear, she poured all the wildness of her passionate soul into that kiss. She felt Ralph match her intense ardour with his own until they were both on the edge of a precipice, at the point of no return. Then, suddenly, he withdrew, and she felt strangely bereft and alone.

'Don't stop,' she pleaded, her breathing irregular. 'Please, Ralph.'

Ralph closed his eyes and brought his arms down by his side. He breathed deeply to regain control of his scattered thoughts. 'No,' he said firmly. 'Not here; not like this.'

'But, Ralph, I...' she whispered softly. How could she explain her fear for the future? The sense of loneliness that she felt creeping back into her heart. She had hoped that a moment of intense intimacy with his body joined with hers would dispel those fears. However, she knew deep down that was a forlorn hope, it had never done so in the past. What was different now?

'We will be together soon,' he said, as he affectionately brushed her cheek. 'I have no intention of hiding you away from the world.'

She smiled wanly at him, hoping that he was right, but knowing deep down that something was about to ruin it all. She reluctantly withdrew from his touch and stepped back.

'Come,' he said, taking her hand once more, 'we must get back to the ball. Supper must be nearly over, and I don't want us to cause a scandal; well, not just yet.'

Helen nodded. She pushed the fear to the back of her mind where it belonged. Anyway, she thought to herself, what could possibly happen that could ruin their plans for the future?