6: Beyond the Pale

The crowd swelled around Alex, moving with the rhythm of the music, and he pressed back into the wall to avoid being trodden on. Perfume and sweat hung heavy in the air, but whilst misses and young gentlemen grinned and giggled through it, Alex found it suffocating. His hand drifted to his collar, tugging at the cravat his mother had insisted upon, and wishing it did not feel so very much like a noose.

As another group hurried past him, a foot collided with his, sending the smaller individual stumbling forwards. Alex's hand shot out, gripping the young lady by the elbow in an effort to prevent her from careening into another guest. She let out a gasp, her lips forming a perfect O as she raised her face to look at him through her raging blush. A young thing, barely out of the schoolroom, Alec thought as he withdrew his supporting hand and inclined his head at her.

"Be careful, miss," he said, forcing his lips into a polite smile. "The crowd is all but dangerous tonight."

There. He'd spoken to someone.

His mother would be ecstatic.

Oblivious to his thoughts, the girl clasped her hands genteelly at the bodice of her blue gown, her gaze lowering slightly. "Thank you, sir. Both for your assistance and advice."

The song finished with the rustle of instruments being set aside and musicians stretching aching limbs, letting the roar of gossip and flirtation take its place. Alex's gaze flicked to the doorway; perhaps, if he moved quickly, he could be out of the room before his mot-

"I'm afraid my friends have quite abandoned me. Would you be so kind as to escort me to the refreshments table?"

Alex blinked, having almost forgotten about the young woman standing before him. Her brown eyes were trained on his face, shadowed by fluttering lashes as she awaited his response.

"Susan!" Another woman, with the same dark hair as the alleged 'Susan', popped free of the crowd, her hand latching onto the other girl's wrist with an urgency that seemed out of place in the busy ballroom. "I was afraid I'd lost you completely. Come along, our mother wishes to speak with us."

The woman turned to leave, but Susan held firm. "This is my elder sister, Mary. Mary, this is..." She blinked slowly, innocent to the point of scandal. "I apologise, sir, but I do not think we've been introduced."

Alex inclined his head; half for propriety, and half to hide the smile tugging at the edge of his lips. For all she seemed guileless, this young woman was staring social convention in the face by demanding an introduction with him. It went against decorum...

Accordingly, Alex approved.

"This is Mister Kilroy."

Mary's sharp words interrupted Alex before he could do more than part his lips, and he glanced at the woman in surprise. Her grip on her sister's forearm did not soften, even as her forced smile wavered under his scrutiny.

"Kilroy?" the other girl asked.

If there was any place where the name would garner recognition, it was in his brother's home. Susan's stare swung to her sister and back, settling on Alex with wide eyes.

"You are Lady Cordelia's son?" Susan's wide eyes flitted across his face, perhaps realising that although his skin was many shades darker than his mother's, he had inherited every iota of her bone structure.

As he watched, Alex saw Mary's hand tightened further on her sister's arm.

"Mister Kilroy is the son of Mrs Cordelia Kilroy and Mister James Kilroy, Susan." Her tone was polite, explanatory, the words carried on a whisper that suggested she was embarrassed her sister didn't know the parentage of the man they were talking to.

It was well done. Mary was a master social graces.

But Alex had borne witness to this conversation before.

Susan blinked for a moment. "Oh..."

Alex let his eyes fall closed in the silence that followed, taking a subtle, slow breath to calm his racing heart as we waited for the inevitab-

"Oh!"

He forced his eyes open, fighting to keep his expression neutral even as he watched the mortification colour Susan's face pink. Luckily, the three of them did not need to continue this doomed conversation.

"Now that you're reunited with your sister, Miss Susan, I will take my leave."

He sketched a half-bow, wishes for a good evening dying on his tongue in the favour of expediency. When he straightened, Susan had done a decent job of collecting herself, her cheeks having faded to their normal colour. If the edges of her smile had not been so strained, Alex might have forgotten her reaction entirely.

But they were. And he had not.

With a twitch of a smile at Mary, Alex turned on one heel and set about forcing himself into the crowd, his hope of escape set on the arched doorway across the room. He stepped around a larger gentleman, putting a physical obstacle between him and the sisters, but that did not prevent their whispers from reaching him.

"Susan, I leave you alone for a moment and you find the most unsuitable man here! He's not even a gentleman, Susan, let along titled!"

"Then why is he even in attendance?" There was an indignance in her tone that had Alex picturing her with a stubbornly raised chin, even as he fought to press through the crowd and not hear the reply.

"I imagine he's trying to climb above his station just like his father did."

The man blocking his path moved suddenly, and Alex took an unexpected step forward, catching himself on a straightened leg. Sharp pain shot up through his knee, and he hoped that any stranger who caught a look at his grimace would think it was because of his awkward landing and not the words that were ringing in his ears like church bells.

Unsuitable.

Above his station.

Just like his father.

More than the words, he was furious at the pain they inflicted on him. Why should the opinions of two ignorant misses affect him so?

He should never have come to this blasted house party.

If anyone had wanted to speak with him, it seemed his thunderous expression kept them at bay. He made it to within a foot of the door before him mother stepped into his path. Cordelia stood firm, even as he caught himself on the doorway to ensure he didn't trample right over her, not the least concerned by the fury etched across his brow.

"Hello, my boy!" she said, patting him gently on the forearm. "Are you having a pleasant evening?"

He was not. But then, he supposed she knew that.

"If you'll excuse me, Mother, I-"

"Not so fast, Alexander!" She deftly wove her arm through his, turning him back to face the ballroom with one forceful tug. "You cannot run away just yet."

She stepped forward, stumbling slightly when he didn't move with her, but her words held him in place as surely as if a sword pinned him to the floor.

Run away.

He could not win. When he stayed, the Ton thought him a greedy social climber. And when he left... his family took it as a personal insult.

"Did it ever occur to you that I am not running away, but running to something?"

His mother reeled back, as if his words had been twice as loud and filled with twice as much rage. Her lips, so similar to his own, parted slightly, expelling a sharp exhale that stole the air from any reply she might have made. Alex couldn't watch the hurt play across her face, and he squeezed his eyes closed quickly.

"I apologise, Mother. How may I assist you?"

She shifted, separating their arms so that she could grip his hands instead. She squeezed. "Alex, I-"

There was too much emotion in her tone for her son to manage in that moment. His eyes flashed open, fighting to put a neutral smile in place as he shook his head.

"Please, Mother, do not mind me. What can I do for you?"

Mrs Cordelia Kilroy did not look convinced, but she let her son loop her arm back through his and direct their attention to the overflowing ballroom once more.

"There's someone I'd like you to meet." She moved slightly further into the room, Alex falling into step easily beside her, and as she spotted her quarry her pace increased slightly. "Oh, Miss Archer!"

The young woman who turned their way, initially with a bright smile which set into perfected politeness almost instantly, was very pretty. Her hair was so blonde as to almost be considered white, with tight ringlets framing a slender face with long lashes. Her dress was a shade shy of mauve, hugging a delicate figure, and the fan that fluttered in her hand was a complementary purple.

"Miss Archer, please allow me to introduce you to my youngest son, Mister Alexander Kilroy. Alexander, this is Miss Madeline Archer."

Alex managed a nod in greeting – stiff and abrupt – and a flash of distaste in the young lady's eyes suggested she was not impressed. Her curtsy was executed to perfection, a governess' dream, and when she righted herself she was smiling docilely at Cordelia.

"It's my absolute pleasure to make Mister Kilroy's acquaintance. I believe I now have the honour of knowing all three of your charming sons."

Alex had never felt more like a decoration. Even as his mother smiled, enjoying the pretty compliment, he let his gaze fall to the tips of his boots.

"You are very kind, Miss Archer. Oh!" Her arm slipped free of Alex's, and he glanced up to make sure she was alright, only to find her attention fixed on the other side of the room. "Oh, you will have to excuse me, my dears; I've just spotted an old friend who I must go and speak with." She was already a step away from them when she turned back. "Miss Archer, my son has not yet made it to the dance floor this evening. I would be so indebted to you if you would do him the honour."

And with that she was gone, scampering off to no doubt watch her matchmaking play out from a safe distance.

In her wake, Alex let out a sigh. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Miss Archer's mouth open, and he quickly interjected before she could speak.

"Forgive me, but my mother is mistaken: I am not in the mood for dancing this evening. I'm sure you will find a much more willing partner."

For all his mother had good intentions, Alex was not of a mood to indulge her meddling.

Miss Archer's lip twitched. "Excuse me?"

He forced a smile. "I apologise, but I-"

She snapped her fan between them, the loud crack drawing the attention of those nearest them.

"I heard you, Mister Kilroy." Mis Archer raised her pretty chin, staring down her nose at him. "But how do you, of all people, refuse a dance with me?!"

Alex might have laughed. What had he done, in this life or the one before it, to bear so many insults that evening? Whatever guilt he'd felt at snubbing the young woman drifted away. Instead, he lifted the lid on the rage he kept buried within him, letting the smallest tendril sneak out and wind its way up his spine and into his brow. His glower was enough to frighten Miss Archer back a step, blanching until her skin was almost the same wan colour as her hair.

He could feel the words on the tip of his tongue as he parted his lips, but there was no telling what might spring forth. Suddenly there was a barrier between him and the young woman; a pretty, smiling face with concerned eyes that had stepped bodily between them.

"You've caught the room's attention," Rosemary said on a whisper, her brow puckering as she scanned his face.

Alex swallowing heavily, taking a quick step backwards. With space between them – and, importantly, between him and the obnoxious Miss Archer – he managed to spit out: "I do not care."

There was a flicker in Rose's eyebrow, a tiny challenge that spoke volumes: yes, he did. She turned quickly on the ball of one foot, her grey gown rustling across the floor, and offering the other young woman, whose mouth was agape in a most unladylike fashion, a gentle smile.

"Forgive me, Miss Archer, but I'm feeling dreadfully unwell all of a sudden." She took a step closer to Alex, stumbling slightly and catching herself with her gloved hand pressed against his arm. Her fingers gripped him, drawing his gaze to hers. "Mister Kilroy, won't you escort me somewhere to recover?"

For every person in the room that was oblivious to the tension, there was another who watched the three of them with rapt interest, waiting for something scandalous to occur. For all his mother might be upset he'd slighted Miss Archer, Rosemary Albright had saved his family a wealth of embarrassment.

Yet all he could manage was a stilted nod.

Somehow, they crossed the ballroom, leaving a stupefied Miss Archer in their wake. Alexander was sure it appeared that he was leading, but in truth he had no idea where they were going. His heart thrummed in his ears, blocking out all sounds of the receding festivities, until the sudden thump of a closing door left him in silence.

They were in the library again, although this time there was no fire burning to illuminate the room. Instead, he stood in darkness, his chest heaving as he struggled to control his temper.

"Are you alright?" Rosemary's soft question startled him, and the shadows to his left danced as she shifted in place.

As he took in a deep breath, struggling to unclench his fists, he briefly contemplated lying. But there was little point when it was Rosemary, who it seemed had always been able to see through him.

"No." The word tore free from between his teeth, and he forced himself to take another breath in. "I am frustrated, and furious, and wish it was my place to stand toe-to-toe with prissy little misses like that and-" He bit off the rest of the sentence, not quite sure that what he wanted could be put into words.

Rose let out a sigh into the silence that followed, her hand finding his upper arm. "Miss Archer is a nasty little gossip, Alex. It's best not to antagonise her."

He pushed away gently, putting distance between her and the emotions that were threatening to overflow. "I've done everything in my power not to antagonise people like Miss Archer for nigh on 30 years now, and it has made absolutely no difference."

"What's the alternative?"

With a growl, Alex turned on the spot. "To be ourselves, Rosie! To not have to care what the Ton thinks of us and our choices." He closed the gap between them quickly, gripping her by the upper arms and locking their gazes together. "What would you do without society looking over your shoulder, Rosie? Who would you be?"

He could see the flecks of green in her eyes, caught by the moonlight as she blinked up at him. Her lips twisted at the corners, caught by humour or surprise at the earnestness of the question.

"I honestly do not know," Rosemary said softly, his hands moving with her as she gave a gentle shrug. "But I would be happy to hear your answer."

She tilted her head to the side, watching his face as she awaited his reply. With the movement, a whisp of her hair fell across her forehead and without thinking better of it, Alex reached up to brush it aside. The pads of his fingers grazed across her skin, sweeping the strand behind her ear, until he was all but cupping her cheek, his thumb resting a mere inch below her hazel eye.

It was the first time he registered their closeness. The warmth of her in the palm of his hands, the floral scent of her perfume so close to him that he could smell little else in the room, his head, bowed to look into her eyes as she looked up at him with a slowly fading smile. He swallowed heavily, heat gathering in his cheeks and then flooding down to pool in his belly as Rosemary wet her lower lip with the tip of her tongue.

"Rosie, I-"

He was interrupted by two soft sounds in quick succession, a click and a quick inhale of air, neither of which would have drawn their attention in any other moment. But then, in the tense quietude of the library, both Rosemary and Alex were compelled to look towards the door.

Then didn't expect to find Lady Elliot staring back at them with wide, horrified eyes and a slack-jawed expression, her withered face creased with outrage.

Andthey certainly didn't expect her to turn on one heel and march out of the roomand back towards the ballroom.

~~~

Hello Lovely Readers,

A surprise chapter - to you and me both! - for Alex & Rose. I discovered this was basically written and thought I owed you all an extra chapter after my long absence, but all I've gone and done is left you on more of a cliffhanger, oops...

I hope you enjoyed it!

xx Flo