#018 – Sweet, sweet loot!

#018 – Sweet, sweet loot!

I let out a sigh as I plopped down on my butt and blinked at the window and the chest.

My mimic senses were tingling, wanting me to make sure that giant chest wasn’t one, but part of me doubted that a boss chest would be a mimic, especially since this was supposed to be a D-rank dungeon.

Still, I took no chances, I kept my eyes on it while I crawled around to retrieve my bucket, hunched down behind the table, and then grabbed some Life ooze from my bucket to munch on it.

I probably looked like a hobo.

“What was this achievement…?” I murmured. “I can guess, but… hold on, three skill points?!”

Tier 2:

I’m the boss now - Defeat any floor boss solo. [COMPLETE]

“Oooh! That was a tier two achievement! Whoa! Didn’t expect that at all!” I grinned.

“And floor boss, huh? I guess that door leads to the next floor then?” I idly mused. “Still, I had no idea I could complete a tier two achievement…”

Truthfully, I hadn’t really checked out many of the tier two achievements since I hadn’t expected to be able to do any of them considering how difficult or time consuming even tier ones could be. Probably should do that now, though.

KaiEbikoOfficial: ooooh more skill points!

KaiEbikoOfficial: what are you gonna get now?

I hummed.

I briefly considered getting new skills, but quickly discarded that idea. I already had full skill slots and I would have to juggle them all the time, which wasn’t very practical because of the twenty-four hour cooldown. That was probably why the cooldown existed in the first place, now that I thought about it. It forced me to get upgrades rather than new skills.

“Probably going to upgrade some skills… Wait, didn’t all the Streamer upgrades cost three? I could get admin rights or group chats!”

I quickly opened the upgrade descriptions for Streamer just so Ebi could see as well.

Extra features - Grants access to direct messaging, polls, subtitles, and group chats with selected viewers.

Admin rights - Allows banning, muting, and timing out viewers, and giving moderator rights to them.

Stream history - Allows you to watch the past records of your own stream and chat.

Faithful cameraman - Allows you to stream from a different point than your own position. You can freely move this point in a ten meter radius around yourself.

KaiEbikoOfficial: oh the cameraman would be cute

“Yeah, but it doesn’t really help right now… Extra features would at least let me better communicate with chat. I can barely read anything right now…” I once again glanced above Ebi’s messages and grimaced as I spotted someone spamming walls of emojis and someone else spamming links. “Admin rights could work too… I could get more mods and ban the worst spammers.”

KaiEbikoOfficial: that’s true

KaiEbikoOfficial: omg

KaiEbikoOfficial: woooooo

“Hmm? What?”

KaiEbikoOfficial: lawyer just donated twenty subs!

“Huh?! Really? Thanks Lawyer!” I beamed, before I stopped and frowned. “Wait. Why can’t I see that?”

I momentarily tried to give a mental command to show me recent donations but the system ignored me. It was as if such a thing didn’t even exist.

“...Hold on… I can’t… I can’t even do anything with the donations, can I…?” I slowly said. “It’s not like I can access my bank account that’s on Earth from here… and even if I could, what could I do with it…?”

KaiEbikoOfficial: oh

KaiEbikoOfficial: right

KaiEbikoOfficial: damn

I deflated with a groan.

“I still appreciate it, Lawyer… Just… yeah. I can’t actually do anything with it…” I shook my head. “Ah, well… Let’s look at what other things I can upgrade… Oh Empower for Craftsman has an upgrade for three…”

Empower - Infuse Ether into the resulting product, making it sturdier and more powerful.

“That could be useful!” I smiled. “But probably not right away. I haven’t even used this skill for its intended purpose yet… What else do we have…? Fire breath has an upgrade…”

Flame bullet - Reshape your Fire breath into a stable projectile capable of traveling much further. One bullet uses double the Ether than a normal breath would.

“This could be really good! I don’t really have any long-range options right now… But it costs double the Ether and I already have problems running out with a few breaths…”

KaiEbikoOfficial: fireballs!

KaiEbikoOfficial: sounds useful

KaiEbikoOfficial: you can snipe enemies from a safe spot

“Yeah, that’s true,” I admitted. “I just don’t know if that’s gonna be possible. It probably wouldn’t have helped much against the coins…” I briefly considered a strategy of staying in the hallway and sniping the coin through the window. “...Or maybe it would have. Hmm… Let’s check out the other stuff first. Appraisal has one upgrade for one and another for three skill points…”

Assess - You can now use appraisal on living beings.

Inspiration - Appraising an item will now tell you about its possible uses. Uses more Intra.

“Waaait, isn’t Inspiration really good with Craftsman? If I knew how to make stuff, I could start crafting my own gear! Or the Life ooze! Maybe I could refine all the pools into more potions!”

KaiEbikoOfficial: that would be cool

KaiEbikoOfficial: Nana the potion maker

“But I don’t have that many materials… Hmm… What else do we have…? Oh, heat vision had some upgrades too. And they both cost three! Let’s see…”

Zoom - Focus on a point further away to see it more clearly in exchange for a temporarily lowered field of view. Can be used with or without heat vision. Increases Intra usage.

Cold stare - Sap heat from any object you look at to warm yourself up and regenerate a small amount of Ether. You can also use it in reverse, setting things on fire by using your body heat and Ether.

“Wait, hold on… That actually sounds pretty useful! Cold stare especially! I could refill my Ether mid-fight! Ugh, but I would need to exchange it for another skill… Not to mention it’s still on cooldown…”

KaiEbikoOfficial: zoom would be nice for exploring the world

I hummed.

“That’s true… Maybe I’ll swap Heat vision back in and get zoom later then… But yeah, probably not what I need right now.” I nodded to myself and then looked over my options again. “Right, so… I think it’s either Extra features or Admin rights… just for convenience, or it’s Flame bullet for combat… Or third option, I can save the skill points to get something more expensive later… like fusion!”

KaiEbikoOfficial: third option is lame

KaiEbikoOfficial: just saying

I rolled my eyes.

“Lame? Oh, you know nothing, Ebi! Look!”

Fusion - Combine two items together to fuse their function and quality. Resulting item quality is capped at rare. Fused items cannot be further fused but can be separated again. Uses a varying amount of Ether based on the quality and size of items fused.

KaiEbikoOfficial: what

KaiEbikoOfficial: it’s a video game crafting mechanic

I grinned. “Right?! Imagine what I could do with this!”

KaiEbikoOfficial: combine mop with sword and become the ultimate battle maid!

I blinked, then let out a snort of amusement.

“Uh, yeah! Sure! I was hoping to get another weapon and combine that with the sword, though.”

KaiEbikoOfficial: but… ultimate battle maid

I sniggered at the thought.

“Where would I source the maid outfit? I doubt this dungeon is gonna drop me one.”

KaiEbikoOfficial: I bet the chest has one

I glanced at the giant chest that I’d been completely ignoring and hummed in thought.

“Speaking of which, I should probably check it out before I decide what to do with my skill points…”

I did my usual routine of carefully approaching the thing and poking it with my sword, just in case. Once again, the chest failed to open its lid to reveal sharp teeth and eat me alive.

KaiEbikoOfficial: Nana really?

“Look! I’m scarred, okay?! I have PTSD! I should never have played Mimic Nation!” I said as my cheeks grew red. Good thing nobody could see me.

KaiEbikoOfficial: I mean

KaiEbikoOfficial: just use appraisal

“...Y-Yeah. I knew that. I was just testing you.” I thanked god for the lack of reflective surfaces nearby and quickly fired off appraisal.

D-rank dungeon floor boss chest

A loot chest containing floor boss loot.

KaiEbikoOfficial: uh huh

“...Okay! Neat! Let’s open this sucker!” I cheered, ignoring Ebi’s judgemental comments.

Unfortunately, the damn thing was bigger than the other chests and it took even more effort to open.

“Stupid short legs…!” I said with a grunt as I finally got the lid to move and it slid open just like the other chests.

I immediately hopped up, leaned over the frame, and peered inside. There were two small objects as well as a pile of the now familiar coins.

I began firing off appraisal on everything, starting with what looked like a wristband.

Waterproof Key bracelet

A bracelet used to navigate Floor 2 of this dungeon. It also has a built-in clock, stopwatch, and an alarm.

This object is a Key item.

I blinked.

“Okay… Key item, interesting,” I murmured as I grabbed the thing. “I’m guessing it means I can’t beat the dungeon without this…? Or does it mean I can’t lose it…? System…?”

The system ignored my pleas for an explanation.

I huffed in annoyance.

KaiEbikoOfficial: probably both

KaiEbikoOfficial: maybe it opens that big gate?

I pursed my lips.

“Eh, maybe? You think floor two is beyond that gate? That feels totally wrong, but with how weird everything has been, I wouldn’t be surprised…”

I put the thing around my right wrist and fastened it before looking at the display. It read 16:21 in big bright blue numbers.

“Huh… Is it really that late…?”

KaiEbikoOfficial: yeah it’s accurate

I hummed before frowning.

“So the time of both of the worlds is synced?” Did that mean that the days on this world lasted exactly as long…? Going even deeper, was the sun in this world identical to the one on Earth? Was this some kind of parallel dimension Earth where humanity had died out? Was that why this dungeon was a water park? Had an actual water park used to be here? The spaceship too…

I shook my head.

I was not ready to delve into that can of worms. Maybe later when I wasn’t starving and in the middle of a dungeon.

“Well, whatever… What do these buttons do…?” I fiddled with the four buttons in each of the corners of the display and quickly learned how to use the extra functions Appraisal had told me about. “This is super convenient! Look! I have a speedrun timer now! Maybe I can speedrun this dungeon once I clear it once!” I joked.

Truth be told, I was more excited about something that felt sort of normal after all the nonsense I had to face in this world, than the actual utility of the thing.

KaiEbikoOfficial:

that would be cool!

KaiEbikoOfficial: you can fix your sleep schedule too

I scoffed.

“Ebi, I’m a Vcuber! I don’t even know what a sleep schedule is!” I said in a faux proud tone before putting on a more suspicious-sounding one. “Do you know what this mythical sleep schedule is, Ebi?”

KaiEbikoOfficial: no idea

KaiEbikoOfficial: I just heard you need an alarm clock to obtain one

I hummed, pretending to be deep in thought, before bursting into giggles.

Nothing like a little silliness to offset the nonsense that was my situation.

“Anyway… What is this then…?”

I leaned over the frame again and fired Appraisal at the other unknown object inside. It looked vaguely like a wallet.

Dimensional wallet

A wallet connected to its own pocket space that can hold any small metallic objects and strips of paper.

“...Huh. It’s like the bucket. But for money.”

KaiEbikoOfficial: better than a credit card

I hummed and grabbed the thing before opening it. It had several small pockets for cards, one bigger pocket for coins, and then a big pocket to fit bills. Just like a normal wallet. I wouldn’t even suspect anything if it wasn’t for the unsettling black void in aforementioned pockets.

I stared at it for a moment.

KaiEbikoOfficial: stop staring into the void

KaiEbikoOfficial: what if it stares back

I scoffed. “Stared at by a wallet. That’s probably also some metaphor for capitalism.”

Wanting to test it out, I reached out to the last pile of items in the chest – thirteen of the Divine copper coins – grabbed one, and then dropped it into the coin pocket. It disappeared into the void without a trace or sound. The lack of sound was actually kind of unnerving.

I hummed and then proceeded to feed the wallet all the other coins as well. It gobbled them up like an afternoon snack.

“Now for the real test…” I murmured.

KaiEbikoOfficial: Nana no

KaiEbikoOfficial: don’t pet the void

I rolled my eyes but still reached into the void with my tiny fingers. As soon as my fingers entered the void, they hit something solid. It was even in the perfect position for me to grab it, which I did.

When I pulled out one of the copper coins and inspected it, it looked identical. No traces of being in the dark void of the wallet.

“Well… I guess I have a wallet now.” I shrugged.

Again, not the most useful of things, especially since I didn’t even have any use for coins, but hey.

I put the coin back into the wallet, stepped back from the chest, and put the wallet into my pocket. As soon as I did, the now empty giant chest shimmered and poofed into mist.

“Huh. Convenient.”

Unfortunately, none of the loot from the chest was super useful for fighting and not dying, but I wasn’t going to complain. The bracelet was neat, at least.

I clapped my hands.

“Anyway! I think I’m gonna keep the skill points for now and see what the next floor is about first.”

KaiEbikoOfficial: I don’t know

KaiEbikoOfficial: sounds dangerous to go right away

“Just a peek. I want to see what the next floor looks like at least.”

KaiEbikoOfficial: well alright!

KaiEbikoOfficial: shrimp fairy Ebiko shall assist you!

I grinned and walked back to get my bucket before heading for the door next to the oversized desk. I briefly checked whether the desk had anything interesting, but all its drawers were  completely stuck. It was like a prop in a video game.

With nothing else left to check, I walked to the door, stood on my tiptoes again, grabbed the handle, and opened my way to the second floor.