Part 13

The soft chime of the bookstore's bell echoed through the room, and Longtai lifted his head from his thoughts, surprised to see Yok standing in the doorway, panting slightly, as if he had been running. His dark hair was plastered to his forehead, and water dripped from the ends, trailing down his face. Paint smudges clung to his hands, bright against his skin, and his black, rolled-up sleeves revealed the tattoos he usually kept hidden under long sleeves. Rainwater streamed from his drenched clothes, pooling at his feet on the hardwood floor. His soaked shirt clung to his chest and arms, highlighting his lean frame, while his shoes squelched softly with each step he took inside.

Outside, the rain was pouring heavily, the sound of it drumming against the windows and drowning out the usual quiet of the bookstore. Flashes of lightning briefly lit the dark sky, followed by the rumble of distant thunder. Yok looked like he had braved a storm just to get here, and he carried the chaos of it with him-wild, unfiltered, and impossible to ignore.

Yok's chest heaved as he caught his breath, his sharp eyes fixed on Longtai with an intense frustration that Longtai had never seen before. Water continued to drip from his soaked sleeves and pants, the droplets hitting the floor with a soft, rhythmic patter. "I couldn't take it anymore," Yok said between breaths, wiping the rainwater from his brow with the back of his hand. "I had to come."

Longtai's heart skipped, his chest tightening. It had been easy to ignore Yok's texts and calls, easier to push him away from the safety of his distance. But now, with Yok standing right in front of him, looking so disheveled, so real-water clinging to every part of him-he didn't know what to say. His instinct was to flee, to disappear behind the walls he'd built for so long.

Yok stood there, unmoving, his hands balled into fists at his sides. Water continued to drip from his soaked hair, trailing down his temples and disappearing into the collar of his drenched shirt. His gaze was locked onto Longtai, as if he was searching for answers in his face. "Are you going to answer me or not?" Yok's voice was tight, frustration laced in every word. "Why have you been ignoring me for days? I've been calling, texting... and nothing."

Longtai swallowed hard, his throat dry. His eyes flicked to the door, then back to Yok. The reality of Yok's presence made his heart race, panic swirling inside him. This was what he was afraid of-Yok was here, confronting him, and there was nowhere to hide.

Longtai's lips parted, but no words came out at first. His mind raced, trying to piece together some sort of explanation, but all he could think about was how vulnerable he felt right now. Maybe... maybe he could test Yok. Push him a little, see how far he was willing to go before he gave up.

"What do you want to know, Yok?" Longtai's voice was low, guarded. His eyes locked with Yok's, though there was a coldness in his tone, a distance that hadn't been there before. "What are you really here for? To ask about that person?"

Yok's expression hardened, his brows furrowing in confusion and frustration. He took a step forward, closing the space between them. Rainwater splattered onto the floor with every movement he made. "I don't care about that guy, Longtai. I don't care who he was or what he said to you. The only thing I care about is that you've been ignoring me, and I don't know why." His voice cracked slightly, betraying the vulnerability he had been trying to keep hidden behind his anger. "It's like you're shutting me out, and I don't even know what I did wrong."

Yok's eyes softened, and the raw emotion in his expression made Longtai's stomach churn. It wasn't just frustration on Yok's face now-it was something deeper, something more personal. Yok wasn't just upset; he was hurt.

Longtai felt his throat tighten. He hadn't expected this. He hadn't expected Yok to care this much. "You didn't do anything wrong," he muttered, barely audible.

"Then why?" Yok asked, his voice breaking through Longtai's defenses. He stepped closer again, his eyes scanning Longtai's face as if searching for the answer. "Why are you pushing me away? What are you so afraid of?"

Longtai's chest tightened at the question, and for a moment, he couldn't meet Yok's gaze. How could he explain what he didn't even fully understand himself? How could he tell Yok about the fear that gripped him every time he started to feel something for someone, the fear that once they saw the real him-the broken parts, the darkness-they would leave just like everyone else had?

"I..." Longtai hesitated, his fingers twitching at his sides. His heart was racing, and he could feel Yok's presence pressing in on him. "I don't know," he finally admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. "I don't know what I'm afraid of. But every time I get close to someone, it feels like... like I'm waiting for them to leave. Like I'm setting myself up for it."

Yok's eyes flickered with understanding, his frustration melting into something softer, more compassionate. He reached out, his hand hovering just above Longtai's arm as if unsure whether to touch him or not. "Longtai..." Yok's voice was gentle now, quieter. "Whatever it is you're afraid of, I'm still here. I'm not going anywhere."

Longtai blinked, taken aback by the certainty in Yok's voice. No one had ever said that to him before-not like this, not with such sincerity. Yok wasn't promising that things would be easy, but he was saying that he wanted to stay, despite everything. Despite the walls Longtai had built around himself.

Yok continued, his hand finally settling on Longtai's arm in a firm but gentle grip. Water from his sleeve seeped into Longtai's shirt, cool against his skin, but the warmth of Yok's touch grounded him. "I don't care how many layers you have, or how many walls you put up. I just want you to stop shutting me out. I want to be close to you, but I can't if you keep running away."

Longtai's heart raced at Yok's words, the sincerity cutting through his fear. For the first time in a long time, he felt seen-truly seen. But that was what scared him the most, wasn't it? The fear that if someone saw all of him, they'd leave.

"I..." Longtai's voice wavered, unsure. "I don't know how to... how to let someone in."

Yok's expression softened, his grip on Longtai's arm tightening just slightly. "Then let me help you. I don't care if it takes time or if it's hard. I just don't want you to push me away."

The silence between them grew heavier, filled with unsaid emotions, with everything Longtai was too afraid to voice. Yok's eyes were full of something Longtai hadn't seen in a long time-understanding, patience, and something else he didn't dare name.

Finally, Yok let out a deep breath, his voice lowering as he leaned in just a little closer. "I know you're scared, Longtai. But I'm scared too. This-whatever this is-it's new to me too. But I'm willing to try if you are."

Longtai's heart raced in his chest, the weight of Yok's words settling over him like a warm blanket. He had spent so long being afraid, so long pushing people away before they could hurt him. But maybe... maybe this time could be different.

Looking into Yok's eyes, Longtai nodded-just a small, barely noticeable movement-but it was enough. He didn't know what would happen next, but for the first time in a long time, he wasn't ready to run.

--

Longtai sat at his desk in the lecture hall, his notebook open in front of him but barely touched. The professor's voice echoed through the room as he droned on about the fundamentals of lighting in photography, but Longtai's mind was elsewhere, far removed from the technical details of exposure and shadows. His pen idly twirled between his fingers, his gaze drifting to the window where the sky remained a dull gray, remnants of yesterday's rain still hanging heavy in the clouds.

He kept glancing at the clock on the wall, waiting for the class to end. Normally, Longtai found solace in the quiet concentration of his lessons, but today, he was distracted-his thoughts consumed by a lingering sense of unease. He couldn't stop thinking about Yok. It had been a full day since Yok had come to the bookstore, drenched from the rain. He had been so flustered by Yok's presence, so overwhelmed by the unexpected gesture, that the words of gratitude had stuck in his throat. Now, sitting here, he regretted it. Yok had gone out of his way, and Longtai felt guilty for not expressing his appreciation sooner.

With a sigh, he pulled out his phone, deciding to text Yok. He tapped out a simple message, re-reading it a few times before sending it.

Longtai : "Hey!."

He hit send and stared at the screen, waiting for the familiar double blue checkmarks that would indicate Yok had read the message. Usually, Yok replied quickly-sometimes even before Longtai had finished typing. But today, there was nothing. No checkmarks. No "typing..." bubble. Just silence.

Longtai frowned, his thumb hovering over the screen. He locked his phone and set it face down on the desk, trying to push away the nagging disappointment that crept into his chest. Yok wasn't even online. Longtai had gotten so used to the way Yok always seemed to be there, always ready with a quick response or some silly joke to break the tension, that the sudden silence felt jarring.

The class continued on, but Longtai couldn't concentrate. His mind kept wandering back to his phone, to the unanswered message. He tapped his fingers on the desk, frustration mixing with the growing worry in his gut. Was Yok upset with him? Had Longtai done something wrong? Maybe Yok had grown tired of his dry, short responses-of the way Longtai often struggled to keep up with the energy Yok brought into his life.

_Longtai bit his lip. Maybe Yok was done with him._

He'd been cold, hadn't he? Distant, too caught up in his own anxieties to realize how he might be pushing Yok away. It wasn't that Longtai didn't enjoy Yok's company-quite the opposite. He had come to look forward to those moments when Yok would burst into his quiet world, disrupting the stillness with his bright laughter and playful teasing. But Longtai didn't know how to show that. He wasn't used to opening up to people, to letting someone else in. And now, maybe it was too late.

The clock ticked loudly in the background, marking the minutes until class would end. Longtai's foot bounced anxiously beneath the desk, the tension in his shoulders growing with each passing second. He kept checking his phone, hoping for any sign of life from Yok, but the screen remained dark. Nothing.

Finally, the professor wrapped up the lesson, dismissing the class with a reminder about their upcoming assignment. Students began gathering their things, the sound of bags unzipping and chairs scraping against the floor filling the room. Longtai packed up his notebook, slipping his phone into his pocket as he stood. His mind was made up-he would head to the cafeteria and find Yok. Even if Yok didn't want to talk to him anymore, Longtai needed to at least see him, to know what was going on.

As he made his way to the cafeteria, the hallways of the university bustled with students, all hurrying to their next class or meeting up with friends. Longtai weaved through the crowd, his heart pounding a little faster than usual. He kept telling himself it was silly to worry so much-Yok was probably just busy or had his phone on silent-but the gnawing doubt in his mind wouldn't go away.

When he reached the cafeteria, he scanned the room, searching for any sign of Yok. But there was no familiar face among the sea of students, no bright smile or wave to greet him. He even looked for Emma or Gram, hoping one of them might be there, but the usual table they sat at was empty. Longtai's stomach twisted as he stood there, unsure of what to do.

Maybe Yok had already eaten and left. Or worse, maybe Yok didn't want to see him at all.

_Longtai's mind spiraled, a flood of negative thoughts rushing in._

He turned away from the cafeteria, his chest tight with disappointment. As he walked toward the exit of the building, he couldn't help but feel like he had messed everything up. Maybe Yok had realized that Longtai wasn't worth the effort, that it was too exhausting trying to pull Longtai out of his shell. Longtai had always done fine on his own, hadn't he? Being alone was easier. Safer. But now, the thought of being without Yok's presence in his life made something in him ache.

He pushed through the doors of the university and stepped outside. The rain had stopped, leaving the ground damp and the air heavy with humidity. Students milled about the campus, laughing and chatting as they went about their day, but Longtai felt disconnected from it all. His footsteps were slow as he walked toward the gate, his mind heavy with doubt.

That's when he saw Sean.

Sean was standing near the university gate, his phone pressed to his ear as he talked to someone. His easy posture and the way he nodded along to the conversation made it clear it wasn't anything too serious, just a casual chat. Longtai stopped a few paces away, debating whether to approach him or not.

He wanted to ask Sean about Yok, to see if maybe he knew where he was or if something had happened. But then the self-doubt kicked in again. What if Sean asked why Longtai wanted to know? They weren't exactly close-he and Sean barely spoke outside of the group lunches. And what would he even say? That he was worried because Yok hadn't replied to his texts? It sounded ridiculous.

Longtai took a step forward, then hesitated, his feet rooted to the spot. He was about to turn away when Sean's voice called out to him.

"Hey, Longtai!"

Longtai froze, his pulse quickening. He turned around, giving Sean a small, uncertain smile. "Hey..."

Sean pocketed his phone and walked over to him, looking casual as ever. "You looking for Yok?"

Longtai blinked, surprised by the question. "Uh... yeah, I guess. I didn't see him in the cafeteria."

Sean raised an eyebrow. "You didn't know? Yok's been sick since yesterday. He's been out of it all day."

Longtai's heart dropped. "Sick?"

"Yeah, didn't he tell you?" Sean tilted his head, clearly confused. "He was drenched from the rain yesterday. Probably caught something. I talked to him earlier, and he sounded pretty rough."

Longtai's chest tightened with guilt. How could he have not known? Yok had come to the bookstore yesterday, completely soaked from the rain, just to meet him, and now he was sick because of him.

"I... I didn't know," Longtai muttered, his voice barely above a whisper. He felt a rush of emotions-worry, guilt, and a strange pang in his chest that he couldn't quite explain. His mind raced, replaying the moment Yok had stood in the rain, smiling as if it was nothing.

Sean gave him a curious look but didn't press further. "Well, I'm sure he'll be fine in a couple of days. But you should check in on him."

Longtai nodded absently, his thoughts already elsewhere. "Yeah... yeah, I will."

As Sean walked away, Longtai stood there, staring at the damp pavement beneath his feet. He couldn't shake the guilt gnawing at him, the realization that Yok had been the one always looking out for him, always taking care of him-even when Longtai didn't ask for it.

And what had he done in return? Kept his distance. Pushed Yok away with his short, emotionless response. He had been so wrapped up in his own insecurities and doubts that he hadn't even noticed what was right in front of him.

_Longtai clenched his fists._ He needed to do something. He needed to make things right.

-

Author's Note :

"Hey there, curious? Will Longtai visit, or is he staying away? Keep reading to find out-there's plenty more to come!"

Don't forget to vote and comment -

Love Yoon -