Part 4

The room was dimly lit, with the golden glow of the setting sun filtering through the half-closed blinds, casting long shadows across the walls. Yok sat on the edge of his unmade bed, wearing nothing but his boxers, his skin still damp from the hot shower he had just taken. His hair was dripping wet, strands sticking to his forehead and neck as he lazily dragged a towel over it, barely making an effort to dry it properly. His body moved slowly, as if weighed down by an invisible force, the towel occasionally falling limp in his hand as he stared off into the quiet, cluttered space.

The room itself was a mess-clothes scattered across the floor, sketchbooks and half-empty paint tubes strewn about, and canvases leaning haphazardly against the walls, some half-finished, others painted over in frustration. On one wall, a large, chaotic graffiti piece splashed with vibrant colors stood out, a stark contrast to the otherwise disorganized space. The mattress lay directly on the floor, rumpled sheets spilling over the edges.

Yok tossed the towel aside, running his fingers through his hair. He leaned forward, elbows resting on his knees, his gaze unfocused. In the stillness, an image crept into his mind.

**Longtai.**

He blinked, trying to shake the thought away, but it lingered-persistent. He could see Longtai clearly, walking ahead of him, just like in the bookstore. His long, slightly messy hair swaying gently with each step, the pale nape of his neck exposed beneath the dark strands. Yok's brow furrowed as the image of Longtai's back became clearer, his slender frame hidden beneath an oversized shirt that seemed too big for him. The way his shoulders moved, so delicate, almost fragile.

Yok bit his lip, his fingers twitching as if they were itching to move. He imagined tracing a line down the back of Longtai's neck, over the soft skin where the hair met his collar. His eyes narrowed in concentration as he visualized the curve, the way the light would fall on that spot. The thin frame, the way Longtai's shirt draped over his body-it was all so vivid in Yok's mind.

Without thinking, Yok threw himself back onto the bed, tossing the towel aside. He reached for his sketchbook, flipping it open to a fresh page. His fingers moved on instinct, grabbing a pencil from the nightstand, and he began sketching.

His hand moved swiftly, fluidly, as if it had a mind of its own. The pencil traced the delicate curve of a neck, the slope of a shoulder, the soft lines of hair falling around it. Yok's strokes were bold but precise, capturing the image of Longtai's back that had burned itself into his thoughts. His eyes flicked back and forth from the paper to the mental image, his brow furrowing in deep concentration as the form took shape on the page.

He sketched the hair first-loose, soft, and slightly messy-before his pencil moved lower, outlining the narrow shoulders and the oversized shirt that hung loosely on Longtai's body. The more he drew, the more vivid the image became in his mind. The thin fabric of the shirt clinging just barely to the outline of Longtai's frame, the way it dipped at the back, revealing the graceful curve of his spine.

Yok paused, his pencil hovering over the paper as his breath caught in his throat. He stared at the half-finished drawing, his mind racing. What the hell am I doing? He blinked down at the sketch, realizing just how intensely he had been focusing on Longtai's back, his neck, his shoulders.

His chest tightened as he leaned back, tossing the pencil onto the bed beside him. He stared up at the ceiling, his sketchbook resting on his chest. He let out a deep, frustrated sigh, his fingers brushing against his forehead as if trying to clear away the thoughts that were swarming in his mind.

Why can't I stop thinking about him?

His mind replayed the scene in the bookstore-Longtai's soft smile, the way his hair fell messily over his forehead, the gentle way he spoke, almost too shy to hold eye contact. Yok groaned, throwing his arm over his eyes, trying to block out the mental images.

But they wouldn't go away. Every time he tried to push them down, they resurfaced with more intensity-Longtai's quiet voice, his delicate posture, the way his eyes flickered with nervousness whenever they spoke. Yok's thoughts lingered on the way Longtai had smiled at him when he'd shown him the paint section. It wasn't much, just a polite, quiet smile, but it was enough to stick in Yok's mind.

Dammit. Yok clenched his jaw, feeling a strange mix of confusion and frustration. Why did Longtai keep invading his thoughts like this? Why was he so drawn to him, to his soft, almost fragile presence? Yok didn't understand it, but there was something about Longtai that kept pulling him back, no matter how much he tried to ignore it.

He closed his eyes, letting the weight of the sketchbook settle against his chest, his breathing slowing. His mind drifted back to the drawing-Longtai's back, the gentle lines of his neck, the soft fall of his hair.

Yok could feel his body relaxing, the tension slipping away as he imagined Longtai again. I have to draw him properly, he thought, a small part of him already anticipating the next time he'd have the chance to see him.

But for now, as sleep began to tug at the edges of his mind, he let himself give in to the thoughts of Longtai.

Just for tonight.

With one last deep breath, Yok drifted off, the sketchbook rising and falling with his chest, and in the quiet of his chaotic room, the image of Longtai lingered.

~

It was a typical afternoon in Longtai's bookstore, the soft hum of an old melody floating from his lips as he organized the new arrivals on the front shelf. The air smelled faintly of old paper, and the sunlight filtered in through the windows, creating long golden streaks across the floor. Longtai had always found a quiet comfort in this space, where time seemed to slow down amidst the shelves of books. The door chimed softly as it opened, and Longtai turned, his usual polite smile already forming.

To his surprise, it was Yok.

Longtai blinked, slightly taken aback. Yok looked different today. Gone were the rebellious clothes-no oversized tank tops or ripped jeans. Instead, he wore a simple white shirt, clean and crisp, tucked into loose denim jeans. A cap, matching his jeans, sat low on his head, hiding his messy hair. It was a far cry from the usual image Yok projected, and Longtai couldn't help but feel a flicker of curiosity.

Yok shifted his weight awkwardly, a slight hesitation in his step as he approached the counter. Longtai raised his eyebrows slightly but kept his expression neutral.

"It's you," Longtai greeted softly, the usual calmness in his voice.

Yok gave a small, quick nod, rubbing the back of his neck. "Yeah... uh, hey." He cleared his throat, glancing briefly around the store before continuing, "You said you'd look for those books I asked about... you know, art history and stuff. I was nearby, so I figured I'd drop by and take them. If you found them." He shifted again, clearly uncomfortable, his voice not as steady as it usually was. His words came out almost rushed, a stark contrast to his usual laid-back attitude.

It was a lie, and both of them knew it. Yok was never the type to be "just nearby." He was deliberate, bold, never nervous. Yet here he was, standing awkwardly in the middle of the bookstore, fidgeting with the hem of his borrowed shirt as if he was a completely different person.

Longtai blinked at him, a faint smile tugging at the corner of his lips as he nodded. "Of course, I remember. I've got them set aside for you. Follow me." He gestured for Yok to come along, heading towards the back of the store.

Yok followed, his eyes tracing Longtai's frame as they walked. It was unsettling, how familiar this felt-the way Longtai moved ahead of him, his long hair brushing the back of his neck, the oversized shirt swaying slightly with each step. The same image flashed in Yok's mind again, just like the last time, and he quickly diverted his gaze, his heartbeat quickening for reasons he didn't understand.

Longtai turned slightly as they reached the back, pausing to look up at Yok. "We usually keep the history and art books downstairs," he explained softly.

Yok's eyes flickered down to Longtai. From this angle, he could see the height difference between them more clearly-Longtai's lips were just about level with Yok's chin. The thought came out of nowhere, and before he could stop himself, Yok imagined how small Longtai looked beside him, how delicate. He swallowed hard and quickly looked away, clearing his throat. "Lead the way."

Longtai nodded and led him down the narrow staircase. As they descended, Yok found himself staring at the back of Longtai's head again. He couldn't help it-the way Longtai's hair framed his neck, the soft rise and fall of his shoulders as he walked. The strange tension building in Yok's chest only intensified with each step.

Once they reached the lower floor, Longtai gestured to a specific shelf. "I arranged all the art and history books here. You should be able to find what you're looking for."

"Thanks," Yok mumbled, turning towards the shelf. He started scanning the spines of the books, but his focus wasn't there. His eyes kept darting back to Longtai, who had begun rearranging a few books on a nearby shelf.

Yok's mind raced, his thoughts in a disarray. Why am I acting like this? He had never felt nervous around anyone before. He was always confident, always said what was on his mind, no matter the consequences. But with Longtai, everything felt different. His palms felt sweaty, his heart was beating too fast, and his usual calm composure seemed to slip away the longer he stayed in the bookstore.

Finally, Longtai finished his task and turned to walk back up the stairs. Without thinking, Yok grabbed the first book he could find-an art book he hadn't even looked at properly-and called out, "I found what I was looking for."

Longtai turned around, his soft, neutral expression unchanged as he nodded. "Alright, let's get that checked out," he said quietly, leading the way back to the counter.

Yok followed, staring at Longtai's back again as they climbed the stairs. His mind kept returning to the same thought-the strange sense of familiarity, the inexplicable pull he felt towards Longtai, and the gnawing confusion as to why he was even feeling this way. When they reached the counter, Yok placed the book down, and Longtai scanned it.

Yok tried to think of something to say, but the words wouldn't come. His eyes landed on the university brochure sitting on the counter-the same one he'd noticed the last time he was here. An idea struck him. Clearing his throat, he asked, "So... have you decided? About the university?"

Longtai paused, looking at the brochure thoughtfully. For a moment, Yok saw something in his eyes-hesitation, uncertainty. "I've thought about it," Longtai replied softly, his voice more measured than before. "I think I might enroll... it's the only one that seems convenient, given everything."

Yok felt something stir inside him-an odd sense of excitement, or maybe happiness. He didn't know why, but the thought of Longtai attending the same university made him feel... lighter. He quickly masked his feelings with a small, nonchalant smile. "That's good. You should go for it."

Longtai's lips curled into a shy smile, his cheeks faintly flushed. "Thanks."

Yok nodded, feeling the tension ease slightly. He grabbed his book, trying to suppress the strange warmth spreading through his chest. "Well, I'll see you around," he said casually, turning to leave.

Longtai smiled again, his eyes flickering up to meet Yok's. "See you again soon."

Yok's heart skipped a beat at the words, but he forced himself to stay composed, flashing a quick smile before heading for the door. "Of course," he replied, the words slipping out before he could stop them.

As he walked out of the bookstore, Yok glanced back one last time, his eyes lingering on Longtai's figure behind the counter. He couldn't explain it, but there was something about that soft, shy smile that stayed with him long after he left.

With a sigh, Yok shoved his hands into his pockets, walking down the street with a strange mixture of confusion and anticipation swirling in his chest.

~

Longtai sat cross-legged on the floor of his small apartment, his camera resting in his lap. The soft glow of the late afternoon sun filtered through the thin curtains, casting warm golden hues across the room. He swiped through the photos on his camera, a gentle smile tugging at the corners of his lips. The neighborhood cat had become his latest muse, and he had taken a dozen shots of its various antics. One photo showed the cat lazily stretching in a patch of sunlight, its sleek fur glistening. Another had the cat perched on a windowsill, gazing out at the street like a sentry.

As he flipped through the photos, Longtai found himself lost in the serene moments he had captured-a flower blooming by the sidewalk, an old man reading in the park, a sunset over the rooftops of the city. Photography had always been his quiet escape, a way to freeze the fleeting beauty of the world around him. But as he swiped to the next image, his mind suddenly conjured an image that wasn't on his camera-Yok's face.

He blinked, momentarily startled. Yok's broad smile flashed in his mind, the way it had lingered when they said their goodbyes at the bookstore. Longtai hadn't expected to remember that smile so vividly. Then there was that small mole on Yok's chin, one he had only noticed in passing but now seemed to stand out in his memory. It matched his beauty in a strange, understated way. The thought struck him out of nowhere, and Longtai's fingers instinctively hovered over the camera, imagining capturing that face with the lens. But then he shook his head, frowning slightly.

What was I thinking?, Yok wasn't some subject for his photography. He was just another customer, another fleeting interaction in the routine of his day.

Before Longtai could dwell any further on that thought, his phone rang, snapping him back to reality. He glanced at the screen and saw Tian's name flashing.

"Hi, Tian," Longtai greeted, holding the phone to his ear.

"Hey, little cousin," Tian's voice came through the line, warm and familiar. "Just checking in. How are you? You sound distracted."

Longtai exhaled a soft laugh, leaning back against the wall. "No, just... thinking about something. I'm fine."

"Well, I'm not alone. Phupha's here too. Say hi."

There was a brief shuffle on the other end, and then Phupha's deep, steady voice came through the speaker. "Longtai, how are you holding up? You've been taking your meds, right?"

Longtai's smile softened at the sound of Phupha's voice. Phupha had always been like an older brother to him, protective and attentive. He had known him ever since he was a child, back when Phupha had been stationed in his village. Longtai had always been a frail kid, born with weak immunity, and Phupha had been there during his worst days, making sure he was well cared for. Even now, that care hadn't faded.

"Yeah, I'm taking them," Longtai said, though there was a hesitant pause in his voice.

"Good. Don't skip them, no matter how well you think you're feeling," Phupha insisted firmly. "We don't want you back in the hospital."

"I won't," Longtai reassured him, his voice quiet but sincere. He leaned his head back against the wall, staring up at the ceiling. "I promise."

There was a brief pause before Phupha's voice softened. "We worry about you, Longtai. I know you've been on your own for a while now, but don't hesitate to call if you need anything. Tian and I are always here for you."

Longtai's heart warmed at the sentiment, and he nodded, even though they couldn't see him. "Thanks. I know."

The phone shifted again, and Tian's cheerful voice came back on the line. "So, have you made a decision about the university? You've been thinking about it for a while."

Longtai sighed, glancing over at the stack of university brochures sitting on his desk. His fingers absently toyed with the hem of his sleeve as he answered. "Yeah... I think I've made up my mind. I'll probably enroll at the one you recommended. It's the closest, and it has a decent photography program."

"Finally!" Tian's voice lit up with enthusiasm. "You've been dragging your feet on this forever. You're going to love it, trust me. It's a great place to study photography."

Longtai chuckled softly. "Yeah, we'll see. It's still kind of nerve-wracking."

"Don't sweat it, you'll fit right in. And if you need anything, I'm only a few cities over, okay?"

"I know," Longtai said, smiling despite himself.

They exchanged a few more pleasantries before saying their goodbyes, and Longtai ended the call. He stared at the phone in his hand for a moment before letting out a long, deep sigh. The pressure of choosing his next steps in life weighed heavily on him. He got up and crossed the small room to his desk, pulling open one of the drawers. Inside, there was a small cluster of pill bottles, each with his name printed neatly on the label. He picked up two of them, shaking the contents before popping the required doses into his hand.

He swallowed them down with a glass of water, staring out of the window as the moonlight spilled into the room. The quiet hum of the city at night drifted in through the open window. The moon was full tonight, its soft glow casting a silvery light over everything.

Longtai leaned against the windowsill, letting the cool night air brush against his face. He didn't mind the solitude, but there were moments like this when he felt the weight of it pressing down on him. Still, he knew Phupha and Tian were always just a phone call away, and that was enough for now.

As the moonlight bathed his face, Longtai took a deep breath and turned back to his camera. He stared at it for a long moment, the urge to capture something meaningful tugging at him once more. But instead of grabbing it, he let it sit there, untouched.

For tonight, at least, he would let the world remain unframed.

~

Yok is drawn to Longtai in ways he can't explain, while Longtai imagines capturing Yok through his lens. What is it about their differences that fuels this fascination? And how will their art shape the way they see one another? 🎨📸

Thank you for reading :)

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Love Yoon ~