CH 7
101st Confession
âCount, I thank you for taking such good care of my wife and children. You have done me a great favor, and I, Hail Phoenaeus , will come whenever Count Agnes calls.â
Soon after Hailâs arrival, the Phoenaeus family prepared to sail north like beans on a stick.
After a year and a half on the islands, their luggage was already overstuffed, but they packed it all in a week.
Thereâs no sense of urgency. They see theyâre on their way to the North, a place theyâve been looking forward to for so long. They canât say itâs a quick trip.
âSo, Herwin, you are going north now?â
ââ¦â¦Yes.â
âGo and take care of yourself. Send me lots of letters.â
ââ¦â¦Yes.â
Lucia and Lucas continued to speak to Herwin, but he responded lukewarmly.
âSis, Sis, do you want to go with us?â
Just then, Henry, who was playing alone a few feet away, walked over and ran into Luciaâs arms.
Even when he couldnât speak, he still liked her, just as he had kissed Lucia.
âNo, Iâm not going.â
Herwin stiffened when he heard the words from beside him.
âWhy? Letâs go with us.â
âUhm, thatâs not a good idea.â
When he didnât get the answer he wanted, Henry pouted his mouth to show his frustration.
âHenryâs going to go north with his sister!â
âNah, there goes the little guy again.â
Lucas smirked and pulled Henry away from Lucia.
It was Lucas and Herwinâs job to pull Henry away from Lucia when he clung to her, but today, Herwin just stood by and watched his brother.
âCome on, kids, letâs go!â
âAh, I see youâre ready.â
Herwinâs face darkened even more.
âSo, little one, youâre going to the North, too, to get along?â
âShhhhh, shhhhh, Iâm going with my sister!â
Lucas scooped Henry up in his arms and left first. Lucia watched them walk away, her gaze drifting to the side.
âArenât you going?â
Herwin didnât answer Luciaâs question, but jumped to his feet and walked away, slowly, at the slowest pace he could manage.
âHerwin, why arenât you coming!â
Scarlettâs urging slowed him down even more. Looking at the ground, Herwin finally stopped walking. Lucia followed suit and stopped as well.
âHerwin, are you hurt?â
ââ¦â¦Lucia.â
âHuh?â
He lifted his head and faced the blue eyes. He wanted to say something, but he couldnât, because he didnât know what it was.
Herwin finally managed to get the words out.
âHerwin!â
âYou must go. Your mom will be furious.â
Unaware of Herwinâs feelings, Lucia grabbed his hand and ran outside.
Was it the sudden bright light? Herwin could barely see Lucia in front of him.
âItâs late, you have to hurry.â
Scarlett urged Herwin into the carriage. Inside the carriage, Henry was sobbing and exhausted.
âThank you for everything, Julian. Weâve had a great time.â
âYouâre welcome. Take care of yourself. Come hang out again!â
Now it was time to say goodbye. Scarlett and Hail said their final goodbyes to Mr. and Mrs. Agnes and climbed into the carriage.
Yikes!
The coachman cracked his whip and drove the carriage. As the carriage slowly moved, Herwin, who had been looking down at his hands in his lap, looked up.
âMy God, Herwin!â
Herwin knew he was being rude, but he climbed onto Scarlettâs lap and poked his head out the window.
âLucia! Brother Lucas! Donât forget me! Do you understand?â
âYes! Bye-bye, Herwin!â
âWeâll send a letter!â
Thankfully, Herwinâs voice reached Agnesâ siblings. Herwin was relieved, but also saddened to see Lucia, who had gotten so far away that he could hardly see her anymore.
She hadnât cried once when he told her he was leaving. Not that he wanted her to cry, but at leastâ¦.â¦
âI thought youâd be sad like meâ¦â¦.â
He felt bad that he was the only one who seemed to be sad about leaving for the north.
Early summer at the age of six.
Heâll never forget that day when a particularly cool breeze blew.
* * *
Since Herwinâs departure for the North, time had passed both slowly and quickly.
In the days after his departure, Lucia was often lost in thought.
The seat next to her, which had always been occupied by someone, was empty, and nothing seemed to interest her.
But it was only for a moment. A childâs memory was short.
Still, she and Lucas hadnât forgotten their memories of Herwin.
Whenever they reminisced about the days they spent playing with him, a letter would arrive from the north, and Agnes and Lucas would be delighted to receive it.
A month, two months, and three months passed, and then the seasons changed, and their correspondence became less and less frequent.
Their vivid memories gradually diluted until they could barely remember anything, and they were too busy enjoying the present to dwell on the past.
One day, when they were satisfied with their lives, the letters stopped coming.
It was a year after Herwinâs departure.
Another year passed, and Lucia was eight years old.
âWeâre going north?â
Lucas asked in astonishment as he and his parents enjoyed tea.
âYes. Do you remember the Phoenaeus family who used to stay at our house?â
âUhâ¦ahâ¦you mean Herwin and Henry?â
âYes. Theyâve asked us if weâd like to spend the summer in the north.â
âThey said that unlike here, the North is as cool in the middle of summer as it is in spring and fall and that there are places where the snow hasnât melted.â
âIf we go north, weâll see Herwin and Henry for the first time in a long time.â
âHerwin⦠itâs been a long time. Right, Lucia.â
âHuh? Huhâ¦â¦.â
Lucia trailed off, still sipping her orange juice.
He thought sheâd be happy to see him since theyâd been best friends since they were kids, but her reaction was odd.
Lucas frowned, then his eyes widened as if he realized something.
ââ¦â¦You, by any chance, donât remember Herwin?â
âUm, I do remember who he isâ¦â¦.â
âMaybe itâs because you were so young, but we were together for over a year.â
âNo, I remember him, but I donât remember everything exactly.â
âWell, Iâm glad you remember. Because I donât remember much of what it was like before I was seven, either.â
Lucas patted his sisterâs shoulder in understanding.
Lucia took the cookie from his hand and thought back to her memories of Herwin.
âI remember thinking he was an angel.â
She doesnât remember any details. She can only see bits and pieces.
He had black hair, red eyes, and was so good-looking youâd think he was an angel, and she think he was also a little bit crankyâ¦.â¦
She remembers him getting angry when kids said things to her.
âHe didnât like being called girly or pretty, didnât he? Maybe.â
Now that sheâd put it all together, he doesnât seem like a very nice person, but she canât help but feel good when she thinks of him.
Her parents and Lucas had told her that Herwin looked out for her a lot, so they must have gotten along well.
Lucia tried to recall Herwinâs face, now a blur.
âHmm, I wonder.â
Lucia stamped her foot with excitement. She couldnât wait to see what life would be like up north.
* * *
âBrother, what are you doing?â
âDoing my homework. Henry, why? Do you need to see me?â
âNah, I just wanted to see you.â
Henry smiled, his round eyes twinkling. Herwin smirked and stopped his quill.
Clink.
He slid down from his chair and rubbed his stiff shoulders.
At eight years old, Herwin had grown to be so handsome that no one would mistake him for a girl.
He had been learning the sword for over two years now, and even at his young age, he was well-built for his age, and he was taller than his peers, thanks to his parentsâ larger-than-average genes.
He was tall, handsome, athletic, and studious, and Henry loved it.
For 5-year-old Henry, Herwin was a source of great pride.
âOh, thatâs right, Mommy told me today that we have a visitor from the Islands!â
âReally? So theyâll be here soon?â
âYes! She said thereâs a big brother too, but who is it, big brother, do you remember him?â
ââ¦â¦I remember.â
âWhat about you, are you both good?â
âI think so, but I donât remember all the details, so youâd have to meet them to know.â
âIs that so?â
Herwin listened to Henryâs constant chattering without getting angry once.
As they walked down the hall, hand in hand, they heard a commotion near the stairs leading down to the first floor.
âSomethingâs making noise.â
âYeah, whatâs going on?â
The brothers looked at each other and then headed toward the source.
âTheyâve grown up. Time flies so fast.â
âItâs been a long time, Mrs. Phoenaeus.â
âLucas is all grown up. How old did you say he was this year?â
It seems that the guests from the islands have already arrived. While Henry scrambled to announce their arrival, Herwin stared blankly at the people in the hall.
The blurred faces of the men gradually became clearer.
Countess Agnes, who had been so kind to him, Lucas, who had followed him around, andâ¦.â¦
âHuh? Finally, there they are. Come down and say hello, kids.â
Scarlett looked up to find Herwin and Henry on the second floor.
She stepped aside, revealing a girl who had been hidden from view.
His eyes locked with those within the walls, which looked as clear as a cloudless sky.
âHerwin?â
The voice from the memory overlapped with his own.
ââ¦â¦Lucia?â
âWow, itâs Herwin?â
Lucia, the girl heâd mistaken for a fairy when heâd first met her, was smiling brightly at him.
Subconsciously, Herwin felt the memories that had sunk beneath the surface gradually resurface.
âWowâ¦sheâs pretty.â
Herwin snapped out of his reverie.
He looked down to see Henry staring down the hall with a twinkle in his eye.
Before Herwin could realize what was happening, Henry released his grip on Herwinâs hand and hurried down the stairs.
âWow, is this Henry? Heâs grown up.â
Lucas marveled as he watched Henry approach Luciaâs side.
Henry jumped up and down, wiggling his chubby cheeks.
âAwww!â
âPretty sister!â
And then he lunged for Lucia. Herwin looked up just in time to see Henry in Luciaâs arms.
âHenryâ¦â¦!â
âHahahaha, Henry still likes Lucia, huh?â
Herwin called Henryâs name, but it was drowned out by Scarlettâs voice.
âHeâs still the same. Lucia, remember? He used to have a huge crush on you.â
âHe did?â
Lucas nudged Lucia from the side.