Chapter 19. Never Fall In Love

🎶 Jhumritalaiyya

Published on 16.06.2022

| AUTHOR'S POV |

Distance is a funny thing. It makes you realise a lot of things that you didn't even know you need to know. It makes you realise how little or more value a person holds in your life. It's strange how some people can be a part of your daily life and when they get distanced, you don't exactly feel their absence. Life goes on with or without them just as smoothly. You don't feel a void.

And then, there are some with whom you don't even get to spend much time yet you feel as if you've known them forever. When you've to part ways or stay away from them, it's tough. It's not the easiest thing to do when your day finds a way to go back to the seconds spent with them. It's like they've slithered their way in your life and occupied a place and then claimed it as theirs and in their absence, you feel a void and you feel a needle poking that void, making you realise a part of you is empty and can't be filled by any other person.

It's pathetic, isn't it?

How a person can steal a part of you and make it theirs, right under your eyes and you don't even notice. How you suddenly have no control over certain things. And then, it makes you do things that you never believed you would do.

It makes you go to the library because you had heard he does come there sometimes in the morning. So, you visit that place in the morning intentionally in the hope of seeing him. You don't spend time thinking about your behaviour because you know that if you do, you'll end up regretting and chastise yourself labelling your actions as creepy and sick.

It's crazy how you were the one who was impatient and desperate for that one month to be over and get away from her and now you're impatient and desperate again but to simply get one glimpse of her. You know her college timings, you know when does it start so like a fool, you deliberately pass through her college road, lingering a bit around there, hoping you could get lucky.

But fate is a cruel thing. It suddenly seems to hate you two. From making you meet coincidentally when you two didn't even want to doing every possible thing to not make you two run into each other when you both fiercely wish for it, it really played its cards well and is now taking pleasure in your misery.

Surely, you two text each other, have small talks and sometimes even call each other but it isn't satisfactory. There's also more that you want, that you crave. None of you takes an extra step and ask to meet each other because it feels weird and awkward and silly and scary and there are a hell lot of emotions you're dealing with and maybe you're scared to name it or maybe you don't even know what to name it. So, you wait. You wait for the period of time to end because you don't have any other choice. And when you make through it somehow, there's no better feeling as Aristotle said, "patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet".

Inaaya's exams end. They plan to meet in the morning at six thirty which is quite early but Inaaya has classes in the evening and Ayansh needs to report at work at nine in the morning. He texts her the place which is close to her house. It's deliberate and it's a little thing but he found and chose a place which is near to her house, at a walking distance for her. There's this whole area where there's a large ground and park and roads where work and construction is still going on and people come to jog, children come to play, some ride bicycles and some just walk.

Ayansh had been there fifteen minutes earlier in his black t-shirt and grey joggers; a little too excited to meet her after almost a month. She comes five minutes earlier than their discussed time in her orange jumper and black tights only to find him already there. There's hardly anyone beside them this early and those present are taking a walk at a decent distance away from the corner Ayansh chose for them to learn a bike.

He sees her. She sees him. They don't have to call each other out to make them aware of their presence. There's no second thought that passes through their mind when they simply run towards each other, throw their arms around the other person and embrace. It's instinctive and natural and comforting and calming. It's like the way the rain meets the barren land after a long wait and relieves it. Her arms wound around his neck, his arms wrap around her waist, it feels just right.

Efforts. It's what has got them so far from having a horrible start. Efforts from both ends. So when they finally separate after the feeling of warmth that has replaced the feeling of longing has seeped to their very bones, it's not awkward between them. They don't let it become awkward. There's a smile on their faces, a happy, soft, heart fluttering smile and there's no attempt to hide it.

"It's good to see you again." Ayansh is the first one to say and a laugh follows it.

"I missed you." Inaaya mumbles back. "Weirdly," she adds and laughs.

"Well.... ," he drawls sheepishly. "I missed you too. Weirdly." He confesses, raking a hand through his hair nervously.

Inaaya laughs, genuinely.

"So, should we start or you would like to eat something first?" He inquires.

She cocks her head to a side. "You think we would get something this early?" He opens his mouth to speak but then shuts it because he has nothing to say. "Moreover, you need to speak to someone." She starts dialing a number on her phone.

"Who?"

Inaaya hands over her phone to him. "My brother." She beams.

His eyes widen and he shakes his head. "No." He denies.

"Ayansh?" Someone on the phone speaks and he clenches his eyes shut.

"What should I say?" He mouths to Inaaya and she looks at him weirdly, urging him to talk on the phone.

"Ayansh?" Kartik again calls out.

"Yes, sir." He hisses and scrunches his face immediately. "I mean- yes, yes Kartik."

Inaaya blows out a breath exasperatedly looking at that exchange.

"I'll get straight to the point." Kartik says and Ayansh listens and Inaaya hopes her brother doesn't scare her tutor away. "I'm really not fond of the idea of you teaching my little sister how to ride a bike. But she's stubborn and stupid and foolish and wants to learn from you and says that she has already given you a commitment which again is stupid. I can't go against her, I can't change her mind," his voice softens as he says that and then again he goes back to his threatening mode, "but if my sister as much as get a scratch, I'll break your bones and make sure you never get to ride a bike again. Understood?"

Ayansh doesn't speak. He's too terrified and his mind is still processing everything that has been said to him.

"Understood?" Kartik asks again, agitated.

"Yes." He answers meekly.

"You better understand." With that, Kartik cuts the call.

Inaaya wiggles her eyebrows, inquiring Ayansh.

He shakes his head. "We aren't doing this. You go home. Go and sleep."

"Ayansh, shut up." She gives him a pointed look.

"Your brother is scary. He's going to kill me."

"Stop panicking." She grits. "He's just a concerned brother."

"He threatened me and now, I'm scared. This is risky and we shouldn't do it." He asserts his point by holding her shoulder.

"You've to be fucking kidding me." She looks at him incredulously.

"I'm not, Inaaya."

"Fine. Go." He sighs in relief listening that and takes his hand off her shoulders. "But then don't talk to me ever again." She turns around and starts walking away.

"Hey!" He shouts, baffled. "You can't do this." He rushes and stands in front of her. "This is emotional blackmailing."

"It is and your point?" She crosses her arms.

"You siblings are blatantly threatening me!" He accuses.

"And you're chickening out and being absolutely ridiculous."

He looks at her like a petulant kid and then exhales loudly. "Make sure you don't fall or injure yourself because I really want to live long." He starts walking towards his bike.

Inaaya grins. "So how many kilometres are we gonna cover today?" She inquires excitedly, pulling her sleeves till her elbows as she follows him.

He gives her a bored look. "You really think you're funny?"

"I do." She nods. "But Alisha keeps saying I don't have any sense of humour."

"You should listen to her. She's damn right." He tries to keep a straight face but a smile slips away.

"Ouch." She keeps a hand over her heart. "You're offending me now." She giggles.

Ayansh shakes his head and rolls his eyes. "I, too, don't have any good sense of humour if that makes you feel any better."

Inaaya laughs. "That means I have a competition now. Uff! That's stressful."

The next hour they spend together where Ayansh introduces her with the various bike parts and systems. He tells the working of each part and she listens attentively and grasps the information. He teaches her how to balance and that's all they do for the remaining time. It annoys Inaaya but Ayansh reminds her that he's her tutor and she needs to follow him so she reluctantly agrees.

Then, he takes her to a nearby tea stall on his bike where she sits behind him not before warning him to not get into an accident.

"Do adrak vali chai bhaiya. (Two ginger tea please)." Ayansh tells the one who's making tea and goes back to stand near his bike because Inaaya wouldn't get down since she thinks sitting on his bike is more pleasing than sitting on the bench.

It seems they're more comfortable with each other after staying away for a month than they've ever been. Usually, people seem to be adrift and they try to connect with their old selves, their old ways but Inaaya and Ayansh seem to be an exception to everything. Distance has just strengthened the budding attachment. And sometimes, you just find people with whom it's easy to be your own self, to reveal your own self and sometimes, you just cave into that urge which tells you to trust the other person and let go off the inhibitions that has been holding you back. It's like letting go off the oxygen support and breathing the free air. It's not only liberating but also addicting.

"It doesn't feel as if we met after a month." Inaaya looks at the bright sun behind Ayansh with squinted eyes.

"It feels as if we just met yesterday." Ayansh simplifies what she tries to explain.

She smiles. "Honestly, yes. It feels as if we picked up from where exactly we had left."

Ayansh sees the man bringing them tea in paper cups and goes towards him to take it. "Thank you." He mumbles and gives him a grateful smile.

"Here you go. Tapri vali chai." Ayansh forwards one cup towards Inaaya.

She takes it and moves slightly backwards to keep the cup on the bike seat but when she places it down, it somehow slips and falls on the ground or more precisely Ayansh's foot.

"Fuck!" He curses due to the stinging sensation.

"Shit!" Inaaya exclaims in horror and gets down. "I'm so sorry. Water someone please."

The man at the stall brings a water bottle quickly and Inaaya spills it on Ayansh's leg. "Does it hurt a lot?" She asks in concern and guilt.

"No, it's fine." He tells lowly and tells the man to take away the water and thanks him again.

"I'm sorry." Inaaya murmurs, trying to gauge his expression but he had his head hung down.

And then, suddenly, he laughs. A chuckle which is followed by a proper laugh.

"What's- what's wrong with you?" She inquires, bemused.

Ayansh looks up at her with an amusing expression. Her scared face makes him want to laugh even more. "You really love to spill something or the other on me, don't you?"

She opens her mouth but then closes it like a fish. "Does it burn?" She asks instead, looking at his foot.

"I'll wear shoes from tomorrow. And maybe gloves on hands so there's not much damage." He stops when he notices the guilt still painted on her face. He sighs. "It doesn't burn or hurt. Don't feel bad. I'll bring another cup for you."

"No." She denies quickly but the man was already there with another cup.

Ayansh gestures to take it and she huffs and holds the cup of tea.

"I didn't do it intentionally." She grumbles.

"I know." He says softly. "And now, focus on drinking the chai. It actually tastes better than what you get at five-star hotels." He adds enthusiastically and takes a sip.

Begrudgingly and yet stupidly, a chuckle leaves her lips and she shakes her head when he gives her the brightest smile. She blows air and then takes a sip of her tea. It makes her feel calm, the feelings that were weighing her down, leaving her as the time moves forward. The morning seems perfect. Meeting Ayansh, spending time learning how to ride a bike, bickering and talking and laughing with him and now drinking tea together. It's all beautiful and soothing. She looks at him with a tender gaze and he raises his eyebrows.

"Thank you." She softly whispers.

"For?"

"For the brithday gift. For agreeing to teach me how to ride a bike." She blinks at him gleefully and goes back on sipping her tea.

But for Ayansh, the time seems to have taken a pause. She looks happy, content even. The way she looks at him with so much warmth and gratefulness, nobody has ever looked at him in that way. He doesn't have to question if she enjoys his company considering he's an introvert and shy and nervous and boring because she really does. It's in her stare, her smile, her words, her actions. She makes him want to open up. She doesn't seem to have any bitterness that holds her back off late. He noticed that even when they used to chat or talk over phone. She's more lively, more cheerful than the Inaaya he knew in the initial days. Maybe he had been ignoring it or maybe he had been too busy to even notice it.

But for the first time, the realisation hit him.

And now he isn't sure much about what he was very certain about earlier. He believed it was impossible but now, he doesn't know what to believe anymore. The possibility which he earlier felt was completely blocked seemed to be looking blurred now. And that's scary. It scares him.

"Inaaya," he calls out, a certain urgency underlying in his tone. She looks up at him, her eyes still holding that twinkle that has been since the moment she saw him in the morning. Ayansh swallows inaudibly before he adds slowly, "Don't ever fall in love with me."

Inaaya looks at him with a scrutinizing gaze but finds nothing on his impassive face. She doesn't say as a moment passes between them and then, she snorts. "Haha.. itne bure din bhi nahi aaye hai mere. (I'm not yet having such bad days)." She mocks and laughs playfully.

And just like that, Ayansh finds himself smiling to her tunes.

"You really have a bad sense of humour." She comments and shakes her head incredulously, believing that what he said was nothing more than a lame joke and failing to identify the solemnity behind his words.

***

This is that chapter which was something completely else in my head and is entirely something else over here and I feel like laughing because I really don't know if this chapter actually goes with the flow or seems like a misfit. Anyways, I'm excited to write the further chapters, had always been before I even started writing this story because this might be my favorite phase of this story. Love and take care everyone :)

Vote and comment ❤️

• Thank you for reading •