King of Depravity: Chapter 17

Those words explode something inside my brain.

Take whatever you want.

My mother killed her first two marriages by taking what she wanted. And the third, she let me pay the price for her needs.

It’s a thing with me, and I get it. But I can’t just take from people around me. It fills me with loathing and dread. “I would never⁠—”

“Abuse what I offered,” he finishes for me, grabbing the soap. His hands come to my back as he starts to scrub down my body. “There are takers, Chloe, and you aren’t one of them. You could take to what feels like excess to you and I would still be like, baby girl, take more.”

He’s scrubbing the blood from my thighs as he says these words, and I feel the tears that prick at my eyes.

I hold onto his shoulders, gripping him like I’ll collapse without his strength. That’s the thing about Killian. I can put my weight on him, he’s strong like that. I feel myself curling around him. “I’m not sure it works like that.”

Very gently he rubs the blood from between my legs, before he looks up at me. “Tell me how it works.”

“In the beginning it’s all take whatever you want. Here’s my credit card. And then soon it’s, I can’t afford that and how can you be so selfish…”

He chuckles then, and the sound of it, like he’s very amused, makes me stop, frowning at him.

“Sorry,” he says, though he doesn’t stop laughing as he stands. “I lack a lot. And you should be guarded with me for many reasons. But money is the one thing I have in abundance. Well…that and muscles. You can’t use those up either, sweetheart.”

The words make my knees weak, I appreciate them so much. But in terms of really believing them, I’m still not sure.

When we’re done in the shower, I collect up the comforter and Killian shows me to the laundry room. All this man does is take care of me, the least I can do is treat the stain.

But I step into his laundry room, my eyes going wide. The washing machine is huge, there’s a folding table and racks for hanging clothes. I search through the cleaners, finding one for treating stains and then wet the blood spot in the large sink, scrubbing the blood.

Killian must have put a spare comforter on the bed, because he comes back to the laundry room, lounging in the doorway, one shoulder against the jam as he watches me.

“I hope it comes out,” I say, stopping up the sink, to let the stain soak over night.

“We’ll just get a new one if it doesn’t. Maybe I’ll get red, then we can fuck even when you’ve got your period.”

I straighten, my eyes bugging out. “How long do you think I’ll be staying here?” What I really mean, is how long does he think we’ll be seeing each other…

But he must think I’ve meant something else. He shrugs as he answers, “Might be a while. Mason moves fast but the Russians are like the ticks of Vegas. They’re burrowed in deep, and they might be difficult to pull out.”

I shake my head. “You’ve got a way with words, you know that?” But I lick my lips. “And I didn’t mean to insinuate I’d be staying. I meant how long do you think⁠—”

“Of course you’re staying,” he glares at me. “You have no protection at your place. There is no way you’re going back there.”

“Killian,” I start. He’s not actually proposing that I should live with him, is he? “I can’t…”

“We don’t have to move into one of Mason’s buildings, but you’re not going back to that shit apartment with feeble locks and girls who will cower in their rooms if there is trouble.”

“I appreciate what you’re saying but⁠—”

“If you’re trying to tell me I can’t order you around, I should remind you, I’m not much for following rules.”

“You can’t order me around, actually,” I straighten, throwing a glare of my own. But his points about my apartment not being very secure are sound. I’m just not sure I’m ready to uproot my life and live with a guy I just met.

“I know how to piss people off, or make them nervous, that’s for sure.” He pushes up to standing, his feet spreading out into a wide defensive stance. Does it bother him?

“You don’t make me nervous. I like that you say what you’re thinking, because then, I never have to guess.”

Then I lean back over the sink, pushing the comforter deeper into the hot water.

But before I’m done, Killian is behind me, his arms wrapping around my middle, his stomach and chest pressing to my back. “Thank you.”

I cover his arms with mine, wet hands and all. Because I’ve just realized that I’m giving him something that’s been in short supply in his life. Acceptance.

“It’s just a big step to live here and we just met…” I look back at him asking him with my eyes to understand.

“Let’s just take it a day at a time. How about that?”

That seems reasonable. It would be nice to paint when I want, take long, hot showers. Sleep in Killian’s arms. I’m not ready to commit, but I can enjoy the moment. “I’m hungry again. Want to get something to eat?”

“You never ask me to feed you,” he murmurs into my hair.

I smile, sinking into his embrace. “I could cook.”

“Tonight, I feed you, you’ve fed me enough today.” And then he straightens but keeps an arm around me to lead me toward the kitchen.

I could argue. Say that all he does is feed me. But I think I’m beginning to understand my value to Killian is beyond his fixation with my ass.

“What do you feel like?” he asks. “Pizza? Thai? Sushi?”

I wrap an arm around him too, burying my nose into his chest. “Pizza. It feels like a carb kind of night.”

He orders up a pizza and we sit in the semi dark, watching the lights of the Vegas skyline shine bright.

I never get to see Vegas like this. My view of the city is usually grit and hardship. From up here it twinkles and glitters. I finally get to see its beauty.

It’s been the strangest, most wonderful day. I’d like to freeze this moment and replay it again tomorrow.

But tomorrow will be a new day and who can say what it will bring…