Chapter 218
Life, Once Again!
âAlright, Iâll handle Jiyoon first.â
Maru called Daemyung out to the hallway with his phone.
âHowâs the club right now?â
âTheyâre all asking Bangjoo a bunch of questions.â
âJiyoon?â
âA lot better than before. Sheâs smiling at least.â
âThatâs good. She was really hard to approach a while ago.â
âYou really should be the one talking instead of me...â
âNope, this needs to be done by you. She told you her story, so handing the baton to me is going to hurt your credibility. Youâre also the president.â
Daemyung paused at the word âpresidentâ.
âUm, Maru...â
Maru knew exactly what the boy wanted to say, so he cut Daemyung off.
âJust take this to the end, Iâll help you. You should talk with Jiyoon. Sheâs calm now, so this shouldnât be as difficult as before.â
âI donât know what I should say. I feel like Iâm going to give her useless advice again.â
âIâm not telling you to go in without a plan. Here, Iâll give you some useful advice. You guys need to talk about her relationship with her parents first. The thing with her heart during tests might actually be a real health issue, so we can worry about that later.â
âWhat do I tell her?â
âYouâre not bad at talking as long as you stay calm so just remember two things. First, find out if Jiyoon has bad feelings against her parents. If she hates them, cheer her on a bit and end the conversation. We definitely canât touch that.â
âIf she doesnât?â
âIf she likes them, but sheâs in constant turmoil with them, ask her this.â
âWhat?â
âAsk her, âhave you ever told them what you want face to face?ââ
* * *
Daemyung looked at Jiyoon nervously.
After coming back to the classroom, Maru dismissed the club. By the time everyone started leaving with their bags, Daemyung asked Jiyoon to come to talk with him privately. This was because Maru believed that Jiyoon might feel pressure from being singled out of the group with everyone present. After that, he moved forward with the conversation according to Maruâs advice. Since Jiyoon was a lot calmer than before, things went pretty smoothly. Daemyung was able to learn some new things and he could carry through with the conversation with the new information.
He was able to get an understanding of how Jiyoon thought of her mother. Surprisingly, Jiyoon cared a lot about her mother. She was beating herself up too much because of her inability to meet her motherâs expectations, this feeling of hers exploded when the guests came over last time.
Daemyung was enraged from hearing what the guests said about her, to think they would look down on someone elseâs child just because they were so proud of theirs⦠Daemyung even called them âdamned cackle of cronesâ out of sheer anger. His face reddened with embarrassment when he saw Jiyoon staring at him in shock, but he was satisfied with what he said after seeing a smile float on her face.
Their conversation continued, Jiyoon started telling him more and more things after a certain point. Daemyung listened quietly. Jiyoon started dialling further and further back into the past into her memories with her mother. At the time, her father was in Korea as well, so they went travelling a lot. But after her father moved to Japan for work in sixth grade, she started getting sick during tests.
Jiyoon looked very bright when she talked about her past. She didnât stutter either. Daemyung had a feeling that this was an easy problem like Maru told him. The trouble only began because her communication with her parents was severed, so Daemyung asked Jiyoon a question. The one that Maru told him about.
â...I donât think I have. Mom didnât look like she wanted to talk to me.â
âHow about you try it, then?â
Jiyoonâs mother in her memories was a person who kindly listened to their childâs words. Maybe they were just misunderstanding each other deeply? Even parents and children misunderstand each other from time to time. Actually, it was probably because they were so close that they got so many misunderstandings.
âIâm afraid my mom might get disappointed. Sheâs already disappointed about having a daughter like me, so if I rebel...â
âI was actually the same...â
Daemyung smiled, thinking back to himself before meeting Maru. Jiyoon apologized. She was a nice kid. She apologized too much, but Daemyung could tell that they were all sincere. Meaning, Jiyoon still had the energy to empathize with others when she was already going through so much pain. Could parents so easily hate a child who was as kind as this? No. No way. There had to be a misunderstanding.
- If you decide to help someone once, you need to take responsibility until the end. Thatâs what it means to help. At least, to me.
Daemyung felt a lot of things from that line Maru told him. He really wanted to help this girl, not just give her his condolences. He wanted to truly be of help to this person.
âIâm not actually good at many things, but Iâm good at listening. If nothing changes after talking with your mother, Iâll listen to your story many times over. You can just complain to me all day if you want. So could you please try this once?â
Daemyung felt his cheeks burn up with embarrassment, at least he was being honest. A silence formed between them. Jiyoon only opened her mouth after two minutes of staring at the floor.
âIâll try it. I think Iâm getting a bit of courage thanks to you. Breathingâs gotten easier for me as well.â
âR-really?â
He got the answer he wanted in the end, Daemyung felt the energy sap out of him. He had no idea consoling someone was this difficult. How did Maru manage to do all of this? Being a wall for someone to lean onto meant that you had to share their pains, Daemyung had no idea how Maru could shoulder so many painful stories from other people.
âIf I take on consoling as a job...â
He had no idea how much the club members would even rely on him, but at least he could try to be of help. For Maruâs sake.
â...Thank you. This is the first time I talked like this.â
âNo, thank you for telling me your story.â
Jiyoon smiled, making Daemyungâs chest flare up with pride.
âLooks like itâs over for now, thankfully.â
He told her everything, so he just needed to send her back now. Daemyung turned to look at Jiyoon.
âIâve kept you a while. You should go now.â
âWhat about you, senior?â
âI need to organize some of the props.â
âIâll help.â
âNah, itâs just sweeping the floors, really. You should go. You have something to do, donât you?â
Daemyung spoke as he opened the classroom door, Jiyoon hesitated for a second before grabbing her bag. She stopped in front of the door to look at Daemyung, her cheeks were a little pale.
â...Are you sick again? Tell me if youâre dizzy.â
âN-no. Itâs nothing like that.â
âReally? I thought you ran into another problem. Thank goodness. Take it slow just in case though.â
â...Right.â
Jiyoon turned back with her head drooped down, Daemyung waved her goodbye. Their eyes met for a second when Jiyoon turned her head, but for some reason, she immediately looked down again. She must be embarrassed after telling him her life story.
âI mean, I would be as well.â
âI wonât tell anyone your story from today, so donât worry.â
âWhat? No, thatâs not really a problem...â
âOh, really? Iâll keep it a secret anyway.â
Daemyung waved again, prompting Jiyoon to finally start walking towards the staircase. Only after seeing her walk out of his vision did he finally sigh, this took way too much out of him.
âPhew, at least I acted like a proper senior for the first time.â
The word âseniorâ sounded a lot different to him for some reason today. It made him⦠feel a sense of responsibility, he planned to be a good senior from now on.
* * *
Jiyoon was so engrossed in a single thought during her journey back that she didnât even remember her bus ride, she took a deep breath in front of the door before stepping inside. She took her shoes off and stepped into the living room. her mother was looking into the accounting book.
âWash your hands and have some fruit. I also found a list of academies so choose one from there. Your Mondays and Wednesdays will be math, and you will spend the other days working on English. Iâll also get a tutor in a bit, so keep that in mind.â
Jiyoon felt her heart start thumping loudly again, her eyes kept drifting back to her shoes at the front door. She could easily escape this if she ran away again. Maybe she should go on a walk? Her fingers started moving towards her shoes. Right then, a voice echoed in her head.
- No, thank you for telling me your story.
How would he look at her if she turned around now? Daemyung was listening to her surprisingly stiffly today, she could tell he was having a hard time listening to her. Despite that, he gently listened to her story with a smile. She didnât want his efforts to be for naught.
She balled up her fists as she walked up to her mother, she decided not to think about anything else at least for the moment. Her mother looked up with a straight face, itâd been a very long time since they looked at each other face to face.
â...Mom.â
âWhat?â
âI need to tell you something.â
Her mother frowned as she turned back to the accounting book.
âIf youâre going to tell me you donât want to go to the academy, Iâm not going to hear it.â
â...I donât want to go to the academy.â
She squeezed the words out of her, her mother slapped the accounting book closed with reddened eyes.
âWhat is wrong with you! Why are you hurting mom so much?! Why⦠How did you change like that?â
âMom...â
Jiyoon wanted to run away, she was scared. She was scared and angry at herself for making her mother like this. Right then, she noticed her own fists next to her. A sign of her having made up her mind, sheâd talk properly with her mother this time.
She wonât run.
Jiyoon sat next to her mother and looked directly at her, her mother was closing her eyes with a hand over her chest. That wasnât a sign of anger, but sadness. Jiyoon observed her mother for a bit more, sheâs never seen the expression her mother makes after this.
Her mother slowly opened her eyes after a shake of her head. Jiyoon noticed her motherâs eyes shake for a second. Was it because she was in front of her?
âMom, I need to tell you something.â
Jiyoon told her mother her story. The fear of tests that developed since middle school. Those moments when she couldnât breathe and started getting cold sweat. She told her everything.
âJiyoon⦠You⦠what...â
Mom stepped forward to look at Jiyoon more closely, her fingers were trembling. Why did she suddenly look so fragile to Jiyoon?
âWhy didnât you tell me? Why?!â
âBecause I thought youâd worry. You were really sad after dad left. I⦠I wanted to help you.ââYou still shouldâve told me if you were hurting!â
Mom slapped Jiyoonâs wrists in anger. Jiyoon was unable to stop her emotions after that, tears started flowing freely on her face.
âBut, but you always had this scary face on when I tried to tell you. And you kept scolding me when I messed up. I was scared. I was really scared.â
âJiyoonâ¦â
âI wanted to do well too. I wanted to do well! I wanted to be your proud daughter and I wanted to be someone you could brag about. But I canât! They looked down on me because I went to an engineering school! The other kids always tell me Iâm really good at studying. And I helped improve their scores with my notes! But I canât. I want to, but I canât do it. I hate it too. I hate that Iâm like this. But if I tell you, itâs so obvious that youâre going to hate me more, mom. Youâd worry about me too. I didnât like that. I⦠I⦠wahh..â
She wanted to sound logical. After a certain point words just started pouring out of her as they came. She couldnât even see well with her vision blurred over, she kept talking regardless. And after what felt like ages of her just talkingâ¦
Her mom hugged her.
Jiyoon didnât stop crying. The one thing she noticed in the chaos was that her mom was crying as well.
âI⦠mom was...â
She couldnât hear the rest of it, Jiyoon raised her hands to hug mom tightly as well. What would happen when they both stop crying?
There were a lot of uncertainties to her right now. The only thing that was certain though was that looking at her mother would no longer hurt so much anymore.
âMy daughter. My sweet, kind daughter.â
Jiyoon cried her heart out as she felt her mom stroke her hair.